The woman should come out and tell us when they want sex

[corrector]

In my case, being on the spectrum makes me even more clueless socially than the average man.

In @Hamurabimbi specific examples, he mentioned women were groping him or saying they have no gag reflect. Has a woman ever groped you or whisper in your ear that she has no gag reflex (i.e implying you can deep-throat/throatpie) her?

Do you think being on a spectrum would matter in the above examples?

 

[GoodMan32]

In @Hamurabimbi specific examples, he mentioned women were groping him or saying they have no gag reflect. Has a woman ever groped you or whisper in your ear that she has no gag reflex (i.e implying you can deep-throat/throatpie) her?

Do you think being on a spectrum would matter in the above examples?

In the above examples, no, being on the spectrum wouldn't matter. Even I would know the gag reflex comment (or rubbing my inner thigh) was a sure sign of interest.

I would imagine lots of girls do more subtle signs, however (unfortunately).

No girl has ever told me she lacks a gag reflex. Then no girl has ever rubbed my inner thigh (other than escorts or girls I met on hookup websites, where I already know for a fact I'm getting sex).

I have had women touch me in less obvious places (back, arm)

 

[corrector]

From age 23 onwards (the age I first started using escorts), you're probably right (about how I fall back on the sure thing from the escort).

What about before I discovered escorts though? I think there's a decent chance I missed some opportunities back then (because I simply wasn't aware a woman wanted me to escalate)

How did you discover escorts at age 23? How old are you? The idea of prostitution (ie guy paying a woman for sex) is a very old idea.
In 1997, I remember the internet speed fast enough where you had various escort agencies populating the online world. You also had allot of classified adult ads in some seedy magazines. When I went to University in the 90s, I was bombarded by classified ads and yes, it was tempting to fvck an escort a day or so before an exam to relieve the stress. I'm like 19-20 years old around that time and I'm a gen-Xer.

May I ask, how did you find out about this? In my case its an off-shoot of a porn issue that was introduced by my dad. I would look at porn, and the idea would flash in my head, suppose I was able to pay someone like that to give themselves to me? That primed me for looking at escort ads when I started looking at classifies. I had $ 40 K access to credit cards at the time, and the thought must have crossed my mind, lets me try an escort. Since 1997 I had always been obsessed with the idea of visiting an escort. I ended up visiting one ventually in December, 2014 on the heels of a divorce and change of Canada law against buying sex the following day. But it took some extreme circumstances like that which are rather extremely one-off events to get to that position.

I'm just surprized you did discover them sooner. Do you regret discovering them in hindsight considering they may have spoiled your chances after discovering this with civvies?

 

[CAPSLOCK BANDIT]

@GoodMan32 can a zebra change it's stripes? A woman can't either. Don't expect them to come out and tell you they want sex. Don't ever wish the game was easier. Wish you were better and figure out how to get there.

Goated post

 

[corrector]

In the above examples, no, being on the spectrum wouldn't matter. Even I would know the gag reflex comment (or rubbing my inner thigh) was a sure sign of interest.

Those are the examples @Hamurabimbi used and is the type of interest he tends to generate of his looks.

I would imagine lots of girls do more subtle signs, however (unfortunately).

But they are not sure signs of interest. They could be doing that with anyone. They could be just their nature to be friendly. The fact is you really don't know. However, something say, like an invitation to a pool party is less subtle, for example.

No girl has ever told me she lacks a gag reflex. Then no girl has ever rubbed my inner thigh (other than escorts or girls I met on hookup websites, where I already know for a fact I'm getting sex).

Then you have not missed out like you are thinking you did. Being on a spectrum has nothing to do with that. Being a sub-8 normie who is not a chad or chadlite has everything to do with it. This should be liberating to know that your spectrum has not caused you to miss anything that wasn't there in the first place, at least that looks like sure interest.

Even in your examples, only a seasoned Don Juan, that's very skilled, and has had experience in nightgame settings, are going to be possibly good at picking up on those types of cues, and even they strike out more often then win. You can't compare someone with your skillset and experience to a more experienced guy. Either case, I don't feel that being on the spectrum has anything to do with your dating success or lack of it. You just need the looks to pull and to be in the right places where it's normal to guys to make approaches with women.

In this climate if a woman is not showing interest then day-game cold approaching is even more riskier. So, one of the beauty in how society has evolved, is everyone is so straighjacketed because of #Me-too and other trends that shame guys in taking action except for the most blatant expressions of interest, is that you can avoid the spectrum issue altogether because society itself has gone mad.

I have had women touch me in less obvious places (back, arm)

So have I, they are normally rapport/friendly touches. If you get too forward, or appear too hungry for that, then they will normally back away unless they are really interested.

 

[GoodMan32]

How did you discover escorts at age 23? How old are you? The idea of prostitution (ie guy paying a woman for sex) is a very old idea.
In 1997, I remember the internet speed fast enough where you had various escort agencies populating the online world. You also had allot of classified adult ads in some seedy magazines. When I went to University in the 90s, I was bombarded by classified ads and yes, it was tempting to fvck an escort a day or so before an exam to relieve the stress. I'm like 19-20 years old around that time and I'm a gen-Xer.

May I ask, how did you find out about this? In my case its an off-shoot of a porn issue that was introduced by my dad. I would look at porn, and the idea would flash in my head, suppose I was able to pay someone like that to give themselves to me? That primed me for looking at escort ads when I started looking at classifies. I had $ 40 K access to credit cards at the time, and the thought must have crossed my mind, lets me try an escort. Since 1997 I had always been obsessed with the idea of visiting an escort. I ended up visiting one ventually in December, 2014 on the heels of a divorce and change of Canada law against buying sex the following day. But it took some extreme circumstances like that which are rather extremely one-off events to get to that position.

I'm just surprized you did discover them sooner. Do you regret discovering them in hindsight considering they may have spoiled your chances after discovering this with civvies?

When I say I "discovered" escorts at 23, I suppose I make it sound like I wasn't aware they existed before then (so I see why you're surprised).

I was well-aware they existed (even as a kid). When I say I discovered escorts at 23, what I mean is that's when I first bought an escort.

I'm currently in my early 30s.

To answer your question of why my 23 year old self made the decision to hire my first escort, here's the story: At 23, I was coming off a long dry spell. I hadn't been laid since I was 21.

I finally met a girl (we met through a friend of hers) I thought was a sure thing. I ended up driving her away by escalating too quickly (Which is why I ended up developing a hesitation to escalate too quickly).

So I finally said to myself "The hell with it. I'm tired of having to wonder whether a civvie will give me sex. I'm going to buy some guaranteed sex." I then went online, found escorts galore, and ended up calling one.

One reason I never thought to hire an escort sooner: I wasn't exactly in a financial position to hire an escort until I was 23.

I don't regret discovering escorts. Do escorts make me lose some of my motivation to pursue civvies? Totally.

Have there been civvies I could have gotten something with, but ultimately ended up ignoring because I knew I could fall back on escorts? Possibly.

However, escorts come with many benefits.

-I know for a fact I'm getting laid.
-The sex happens when it's convenient for me. I contact an escort on my own schedule.
-I can pick my escort. Whereas with civvies, I have to take whichever civvie throws me a bone.
-The escort won't try to start a romantic relationship with me.

Then perhaps the biggest benefit: The amount of time I save. I think I've mentioned on this forum that when I used hookup websites during college, for every successful lay, there were many hours wasted on failures. Many civvies on the hookup websites either rejected me or ignored me.

I don't have as much free time as I did during college. I don't have time to spend hours every day on hookup websites.

 

[AmsterdamAssassin]

@corrector

Couple questions:

1. Would you wear a pink shirt?
2. If you're out with your woman and she asks you to carry her handbag for a few minutes, would you?
3. Let's say you're married; would you have issues carrying the diaper bag for your baby?
4. Would you carry your infant in a Bjorn or sling?

5. Your woman asks you to pop down to the store to get her some tampons, would you get them?
6. You're alone with a male friend who has pulled a muscle between his shoulder blades where he cannot reach and asks you to rub some juniper balm on the spot, would you?
7. A male friend has an anxiety attack in a department store and reaches out to you to hold his hand for a moment, would you?
8. You're in the hospital with a broken leg put in traction so you cannot leave the bed and a male nurse comes over to your bed to wash you, do you let him?

 

[corrector]

5. Your woman asks you to pop down to the store to get her some tampons, would you get them?
6. You're alone with a male friend who has pulled a muscle between his shoulder blades where he cannot reach and asks you to rub some juniper balm on the spot, would you?
7. A male friend has an anxiety attack in a department store and reaches out to you to hold his hand for a moment, would you?
8. You're in the hospital with a broken leg put in traction so you cannot leave the bed and a male nurse comes over to your bed to wash you, do you let him?

Would you wipe your male friend's a$$ after he takes a sh1t because he injured his hand? Even if there is no toilet paper?

The answers to the other questions is yes. I put my dad's socks on, help him with bandages and yes hug him. There is no male friend apart from my own dad.

 

[GoodMan32]

When I say I "discovered" escorts at 23, I suppose I make it sound like I wasn't aware they existed before then (so I see why you're surprised).

I was well-aware they existed (even as a kid). When I say I discovered escorts at 23, what I mean is that's when I first bought an escort.

I'm currently in my early 30s.

To answer your question of why my 23 year old self made the decision to hire my first escort, here's the story: At 23, I was coming off a long dry spell. I hadn't been laid since I was 21.

I finally met a girl (we met through a friend of hers) I thought was a sure thing. I ended up driving her away by escalating too quickly (Which is why I ended up developing a hesitation to escalate too quickly).

So I finally said to myself "The hell with it. I'm tired of having to wonder whether a civvie will give me sex. I'm going to buy some guaranteed sex." I then went online, found escorts galore, and ended up calling one.

One reason I never thought to hire an escort sooner: I wasn't exactly in a financial position to hire an escort until I was 23.

I don't regret discovering escorts. Do escorts make me lose some of my motivation to pursue civvies? Totally.

Have there been civvies I could have gotten something with, but ultimately ended up ignoring because I knew I could fall back on escorts? Possibly.

However, escorts come with many benefits.

-I know for a fact I'm getting laid.
-The sex happens when it's convenient for me. I contact an escort on my own schedule.
-I can pick my escort. Whereas with civvies, I have to take whichever civvie throws me a bone.
-The escort won't try to start a romantic relationship with me.

Then perhaps the biggest benefit: The amount of time I save. I think I've mentioned on this forum that when I used hookup websites during college, for every successful lay, there were many hours wasted on failures. Many civvies on the hookup websites either rejected me or ignored me.

I don't have as much free time as I did during college. I don't have time to spend hours every day on hookup websites.

@corrector Another benefit of escorts I forgot to mention: I've only ever had one escort turn down my fetish. Civvies, on the other hand, are a mixed bag (as far as whether they'll indulge in my fetish).

Then on the general topic of escorts and civvies, you were wondering (earlier in the thread) what type of woman I go for (looks-wise). I put some escorts I've been with into the AI looks rater.

The escorts ranged from 4 to 9.

Then I put some of my civvies into the AI rater.

Civvies I've banged ranged from 4 to 8.

Civvies I've had sexless dates with ranged from 4 to 7.

 

[HaleyBaron]

To resurrect and add to this thread, women are insanely at the advantage. Even if you do close her for sex and do all the proper steps, and you sleep together, she can still claim its rape either the next day or a week from now depending on her mood and/or the investigative pressuring from her peers. There is an entire subreddit showing stories of men who got falsely accused by the most ****ties of situations where the man was clearly in the right and their lives destroyed. So it's not like the man would win even if the woman openly pulls the man into her arms. I've recently seen male friends get rejected after being led on, and one has a rape accusation despite the girl letting him **** her.

I honestly believe that you only have these options:

• Get a gf and use her as your sex release. Hell, get several of them. Key here is that you have ramport with them, so it's harder to accuse you of rape.
• Become a celibate monk and sustain from women forever.
• Go international and **** escorts.

Otherwise, you are always rolling the dice in most first world countries. If you really do like *****, just accept that sometimes a girl can do whatever she wants and prepare for the rejection. And if you get accused of rape, stay firm and don't lose your mind. If you do ONS, keep it as far away from your friend group as possible to minimize social damage since the public does not care if you are guilty or not. You now have that mark while the girl gets to walk around with no consequences.

It is a ****ty deal and a ****ty world.

 

[Hamurabimbi]

To resurrect and add to this thread, women are insanely at the advantage. Even if you do close her for sex and do all the proper steps, and you sleep together, she can still claim its rape either the next day or a week from now depending on her mood and/or the investigative pressuring from her peers. There is an entire subreddit showing stories of men who got falsely accused by the most ****ties of situations where the man was clearly in the right and their lives destroyed. So it's not like the man would win even if the woman openly pulls the man into her arms. I've recently seen male friends get rejected after being led on, and one has a rape accusation despite the girl letting him **** her.

I honestly believe that you only have these options:

• Get a gf and use her as your sex release. Hell, get several of them. Key here is that you have ramport with them, so it's harder to accuse you of rape.
• Become a celibate monk and sustain from women forever.
• Go international and **** escorts.

Otherwise, you are always rolling the dice in most first world countries. If you really do like *****, just accept that sometimes a girl can do whatever she wants and prepare for the rejection. And if you get accused of rape, stay firm and don't lose your mind. If you do ONS, keep it as far away from your friend group as possible to minimize social damage since the public does not care if you are guilty or not. You now have that mark while the girl gets to walk around with no consequences.

It is a ****ty deal and a ****ty world.

I simply cannot comprehend this.

 

[Robert28]

To resurrect and add to this thread, women are insanely at the advantage. Even if you do close her for sex and do all the proper steps, and you sleep together, she can still claim its rape either the next day or a week from now depending on her mood and/or the investigative pressuring from her peers. There is an entire subreddit showing stories of men who got falsely accused by the most ****ties of situations where the man was clearly in the right and their lives destroyed. So it's not like the man would win even if the woman openly pulls the man into her arms. I've recently seen male friends get rejected after being led on, and one has a rape accusation despite the girl letting him **** her.

I honestly believe that you only have these options:

• Get a gf and use her as your sex release. Hell, get several of them. Key here is that you have ramport with them, so it's harder to accuse you of rape.
• Become a celibate monk and sustain from women forever.
• Go international and **** escorts.

Otherwise, you are always rolling the dice in most first world countries. If you really do like *****, just accept that sometimes a girl can do whatever she wants and prepare for the rejection. And if you get accused of rape, stay firm and don't lose your mind. If you do ONS, keep it as far away from your friend group as possible to minimize social damage since the public does not care if you are guilty or not. You now have that mark while the girl gets to walk around with no consequences.

It is a ****ty deal and a ****ty world.

I’ve probably lost more women due to not being aggressive on dates and just grabbing her and kissing her or whatever. But this is why.

 

[Hamurabimbi]

I’ve probably lost more women due to not being aggressive on dates and just grabbing her and kissing her or whatever. But this is why.

I go for the kiss. at least, on every first date. Otherwise. It’s non-sexual.

 

[Robert28]

I go for the kiss. at least, on every first date. Otherwise. It’s non-sexual.

I go for the kiss but 90% of the time it’s at the end. Most women want and fantasize about you grabbing them and kissing them middle of the date unexpectedly and that’s just not me on a first date. Had a date with a girl who friendzoned me but suddenly changed her mind and asked me out, I kissed her but it was at the end of the date. Still think I lost her interest because I wasn’t more aggressive but it was weird going from friendzone to a date for me. Oh well.

 

[Bigpapa]

I go for the kiss but 90% of the time it’s at the end. Most women want and fantasize about you grabbing them and kissing them middle of the date unexpectedly and that’s just not me on a first date. Had a date with a girl who friendzoned me but suddenly changed her mind and asked me out, I kissed her but it was at the end of the date. Still think I lost her interest because I wasn’t more aggressive but it was weird going from friendzone to a date for me. Oh well.

My dear friend, you made a lot of progress since I first saw your posts here

Congrats!

 

[Robert28]

My dear friend, you made a lot of progress since I first saw your posts here

Congrats!

Still swinging and missing a lot lol it bothered me for about 10 days with whatever I did to make the friendzone girl lose interest but whatever. She tried to re-friendzone me and I was like “nah I’m good”. Only reason she went out with me was because her co-workers saw me and some other people she knew and told her I was hot and she needed to give me a chance. So i guess pre-selection isn’t always fool proof.

 

[Bigpapa]

. So i guess pre-selection isn’t always fool proof.

Nothing is, but it works most of the time

In your case it kinda looks like there is / was another guy in the picture. Just Bad timing if you ask me

 

[Robert28]

Nothing is, but it works most of the time

In your case it kinda looks like there is / was another guy in the picture. Just Bad timing if you ask me

You are actually 100% right about another guy because she let it slip she have her number to another guy on our second date. I cut that date short and took her home and told her I don’t see any point in continuing this. Then she texted me “I hope this doesn’t change things between us, I didn’t mean to make you feel that way, are you not wanting to be my friend anymore?” And I just said “it changes everything, no hard feelings, and nah I’m good on being your friend or anything else. Good luck”

 

[HaleyBaron]

You are actually 100% right about another guy because she let it slip she have her number to another guy on our second date. I cut that date short and took her home and told her I don’t see any point in continuing this. Then she texted me “I hope this doesn’t change things between us, I didn’t mean to make you feel that way, are you not wanting to be my friend anymore?” And I just said “it changes everything, no hard feelings, and nah I’m good on being your friend or anything else. Good luck”

I would have not sent anything back to her on that last reply. Silence is always the best weapon.

 

[Robert28]

I would have not sent anything back to her on that last reply. Silence is always the best weapon.

Yeah hindsight is 20/20 but to be honest I was just done at that point. So I don’t care how I handled it because I didn’t want to talk to her ever again anyways.