The truth behind waiting for HER to call YOU.

[DonGorgon]

she does not ever need to call you.. and will only want u if you are in the top 5% of duds she knows..

 

[sageproduct]

Wow, this thread is spectacular. Backbreaker, your breakdown has really given me tons of insight into following up/playing the game between dates. That aspect is a huge sticking point for me right now, I have pissed away many good things with sh1tty mid-game.

 

[backbreaker]

yeah ghost.

sageproduct i like that term, mid game. never thought of it like that. and of the three it's my fav though I'm not bad at either.

OP what i am worried about is this... i think in your head that you have made the connection between you running proper game and the girl being a GF material.

under normal circumstances, i.e with you having 3-4 plates already i would hav emoved on. she's not GF material. a girl who tells you she's dating someone else, and has sex with you on the first night, is not GF material. I don't want to see you get head over heels for her only to find out 1. she isnt' leaving her BF or even worsae, she actually does leaveh er BF and you think it's all great and she goes bat**** crazy and does some stupid **** and hurtsy our feelings.

think of a girl like this like having an exotic pet. yeah you can tame it. but eventually that natrual instinct will come out and they will go nature on your ass eventually and it's nothing you can do about it. that cute little tiger pup you bought when it was 3 months old is now 3 years old and this **** you are talking isn't cutting it and it wants some ****ing meat.. and you have a lot of meat lol. **** it i will eat you. and it's not because it's a bad adnimal or that you are a bad pet keeper.. it's a ****ing tiger lol. it's what tigers do they eat ****.

this girl is going to ventuglaly go skank, becuase frankley she's a skank. even skanks like falling for a guy so you can manag ethem for a while but eventually she will revert to her nature and go skank. just be prepared.

 

[st_99]

this girl is going to ventuglaly go skank, becuase frankley she's a skank..

i dont think this sort of talk was in spiegals plans. why do i say that? because his posts sound very enthusiastic.

 

[backbreaker]

well calling her a skank is not nice.

i would say that she however has an extremely long way to convince me she is LTR material. it would be a pretty good amount of time before i was willing to be exclusive with this girl. it would take a few months of her being a good girl and convincing her cheating on her bf with me was a one time thing and that he is no longer in the picture in any way shape or form nor is any other guy.

this is the type of girl that you have to triple screen.

ST: OP really likes this girl. he doesn't have to tell me he does you can see it in his post regardless of what he is saying he is developing a small case of oneitis.

 

[spiegel549]

well calling her a skank is not nice.

i would say that she however has an extremely long way to convince me she is LTR material. it would be a pretty good amount of time before i was willing to be exclusive with this girl. it would take a few months of her being a good girl and convincing her cheating on her bf with me was a one time thing and that he is no longer in the picture in any way shape or form nor is any other guy.

this is the type of girl that you have to triple screen.

ST: OP really likes this girl. he doesn't have to tell me he does you can see it in his post regardless of what he is saying he is developing a small case of oneitis.

Backbreaker Your analogy with the "wild animal," is a very good case and point. She may start to calm down, start to enjoy seeing me, etc but then sooner or later she may eventually snap and go wild again.

So the solution to that is take things slow, and play how I have been playing it to the max correct? Don't invest my emotions, make her work for my attention, let her prove that she is worth my time right?

Honestly yeah I am developing a bit of one-i-tis. I dig this girl, its an old AFC habit that when I start to see a chick I let emotions come into play too early on and just get hurt. I do not, I CAN'T keep doing that same mistake over and over again.

Do you really think she has a boyfriend? Compared to just dealing with ex boyfriend drama? She originally said "I am dating someone else, and she bailed that 2nd time in the past due to "her ex having something to say when he showed up."

I know this all reeks of drama, and at this point she really does have to prove that she can be LTR material before investing my time and emotions and finding out 3 months later "sorry I am back with my ex." or some bull****.

The big question

I can't promise I won't get emotionally attached to some extent, but I will promise I will not get head over heals with this broad. I understand at any point she can drop out. So is there anything wrong with just riding it out? Seeing were it goes, seeing if she pulls a 180 and proves herself to be worth it?

she does not ever need to call you.. and will only want u if you are in the top 5% of duds she knows..

How can I achieve that??


I would hate to just drop it. Anytime I call she picks right up, the past 2 times hanging out were a blast, and the sex was ****ing amazing. I really feel she is still connected with her ex, maybe not officially still together, but definitely in touch..I know what a women says and does are two different things but she was lying on my bed the last time I saw her and she goes "You know I like you...you are starting to become important to me" I just smiled. At the end of the day I have a blast with her, don't need to spend any money on her, and the sex is ****ing amazing...

I still need to spin multiple plates, and she is not going to stop me from doing that. If this all fails I want to be able to tell myself that I played my cards perfectly, and I could not of done anything different. and move on if that happens. Who knows maybe i'll be the guy to turn her ass around, if not, onto the next.

My biggest regret always from a "failed chick" is that I made the wrong moves, the wrong game play. I want to stop this once and for all and be able to play my **** to the max, on my A++ game always.

 

[DonGorgon]

a girl who tells you she's dating someone else, and has sex with you on the first night, is not GF material.

dude.. women act different with different dudes... they have dudes they F n night one and dudes they dont F for 90 days... it just depends on how you make her fee asexually and is not and indicator or where she is god or bad... women who are GF material still are cheater and promiscuous..lol

 

[backbreaker]

dude.. women act different with different dudes... they have dudes they F n night one and dudes they dont F for 90 days... it just depends on how you make her fee asexually and is not and indicator or where she is god or bad... women who are GF material still are cheater and promiscuous..lol

bro with all due respect you have about as much game as regis philbin lol.

while a agree, sex is not an indicator of morality, i'm the spokesperson for that line, how you treat someone you are dating lol, is an indicator of morality. In other rods, it's one thing to fall out of love with a guy and start pinning for someone else. it's another thing to cheat on the guy for no reason when you clearly have lost interest and it's time to go.


I don't care that she is ****ing the OP. But cheating on her BF, constantly, on a whem, that's a huge red flag of moral character. not saying youc an't have fun with her but don't start a threat in 6 months asking how she could break my heart the way she did and not give a damn about it

 

[spiegel549]

bro with all due respect you have about as much game as regis philbin lol.

while a agree, sex is not an indicator of morality, i'm the spokesperson for that line, how you treat someone you are dating lol, is an indicator of morality. In other rods, it's one thing to fall out of love with a guy and start pinning for someone else. it's another thing to cheat on the guy for no reason when you clearly have lost interest and it's time to go.


I don't care that she is ****ing the OP. But cheating on her BF, constantly, on a whem, that's a huge red flag of moral character. not saying youc an't have fun with her but don't start a threat in 6 months asking how she could break my heart the way she did and not give a damn about it

LOL....I understand what your saying bro I do, your game play has been solid for me so far so I am sticking to it.

The only thing brother is why do you keep thinking she has a boyfriend? I know a lot of her friends male & female and no one has ever heard nor seen anything about a boyfriend.

She said she was "dating someone," maybe spinning a few plates, maybe re sparking with her ex, but do you really think she is in some 2 year LTR while she is coming over and ****ing me??

I may not be at your level of game yet, but a younger girl like this can't be THAT GOOD at hiding a current LTR. I may have to post on this site for help but I am not completely retarded. I pick and pry indirectly and she doesn't seem to mention anything at all about some long time BF she has been dating.

My last ex ****ed me on the first date and she had a few ex bf's she kept in touch with. I ended up having a LTR for 3 years, until she started talking about having a kid LOL which then I ran out the door.


Now don't tear me apart, I am not challenging your knowledge BB, I am just throwing this at you so you can please explain it to me, so I can get on YOUR level and see things more clearly.

Thanks Bro

 

[Young Juan]

Girls CAN be that good. In my mind, girls are naturally good at deception. Guys need practice.

When I first read the thread, what came to mind about why she got that "corrupt" vibe at first was either 1) Other dude found out (maybe a gf of hers) and tried to character assassinate you due to age difference or 2) she was paranoid from being too high and overthought. That ish has happened to me before. I was otw to a chicks dorm high, got super nervous for some reason and ditched her. Weed amplifies feelings of discomfort, at least in my experience.

You're on the right path. I think your on the verge of the upper hand situation where she's got you on the pedestal. From my experience, once you're there all you have to do is keep calm and carry on.

Honestly, you might already be there.

As far as GF material goes. I wouldn't ask. Not because I don't trust but because the "so, what are we"/"where is this going?" conversation is inevitable, no need to rush it. Let her lay all her cards out on the table first before you make a decision. Just my humble opinion

 

[spiegel549]

Girls CAN be that good. In my mind, girls are naturally good at deception. Guys need practice.

When I first read the thread, what came to mind about why she got that "corrupt" vibe at first was either 1) Other dude found out (maybe a gf of hers) and tried to character assassinate you due to age difference or 2) she was paranoid from being too high and overthought. That ish has happened to me before. I was otw to a chicks dorm high, got super nervous for some reason and ditched her. Weed amplifies feelings of discomfort, at least in my experience.

You're on the right path. I think your on the verge of the upper hand situation where she's got you on the pedestal. From my experience, once you're there all you have to do is keep calm and carry on.

Honestly, you might already be there.

As far as GF material goes. I wouldn't ask. Not because I don't trust but because the "so, what are we"/"where is this going?" conversation is inevitable, no need to rush it. Let her lay all her cards out on the table first before you make a decision. Just my humble opinion

Thanks for posting bro, dude she came over high as a kite, when she first showed up at my door her eyes were rolling to the back of her head lol...she was spacing out. I can easily see how your #2 thought could be accurate...later after we ate food etc she goes "I am starting to calm down now that I ate."

I honestly don't have knowledge when it comes to weed, I mean I enjoy a eatable every now and again but maybe she was so toked up that she was getting all worked up lol...very possible bro.

Like you said There is really NOTHING I can do but just continue doing what I have been doing, proceeding slow and steady and letting her bring up all the "were is this going" crap (if it reaches that)

Agreed?

 

[backbreaker]

Lol I don’t’ know why everyone thinks I’m an ******* I’m really not.

You’ve done, pretty much, absolutely nothing wrong. I would go so far as to say this thread should be sticked, not because of my contribution, but this is textbook how it should work. This is how you control frame, this is how you manage a girl.

This is all I am saying; you are going to have one of the best dates of your life next week. She’s into you, and she’s gonna miss you. She’s gonna dress up and look unreal, she’s gonna smell good, she’s gonna be flirty and touchy, you are going to have a great conversation, she’s going to **** your brains out. She’s gonna pretend to give a **** about the **** you give a **** about. She’s gonna like the same music as you. She’s gonna like the same TV shows as you. She’s gonna play up the good girl role because she likes you and she is dreaming of you and she wants to be with you.

This is the by product of running great game. You’ve pretty much got her. All I am saying is that, do not mistake what is about to happen, i.e agirl being head over heels for you, and her putting on her best good girl/interested chick front because she wants you with a woman’s datable qualities/character. Character is something that is judged in the long run, not a good **** and a girl laughing at your jokes. She does that because she’s into you, because you’v e done your job. Not because she would make a great GF. There is a big different. I expect girls to act that way around me because I blow them away. But it takes some time to judge a girls character.. how she treats friends, how hard does she work, does she use sex to get what she wants or does she enjoy sex? How she treats ex boyfriends, does she have any cobwebs that she is trying to hide, how is she with money? Is she a chronic lyer? Does she have a drug habit (you’d be surprised how many, and most can hide it for a month or so pretty easily)? Does she have a ****ty temper? Things are great now but what about 3 weeks from now when it’s a regular ass Thursday night?

Because what you are about to experience starting next week is dating equivalent of shock and awe lol. she is going to bombard you with everything you want because she had decided she wants you. But just because she wants you, doesn’t mean she is dating material.

 

[PrettyBoyAJ]

I just read the first post and one more post by the OP. I don't see what is so good about this.

This girl flaked out and gave you an excuse about her ex bf. This means that she is still talking/fkng this dude. and then she runs to you and you reward this girl with some d!ck? You should have told that girl to go to her ex and to leave you the hell alone. (AJ logically thinking).

But most dudes can't control their d!ck so whatever. Hit this girl once and kick her butt to the curb because their is no reason she can be long term material unless she is breaking bread. (This is what I would have done)

Then you actually spend money on her and take her out?? That's crazy. (This is what happens to people who can't control their d!ck!)

Value your d1ck fellas.

That's my two cents. I will read more in the thread if I missed something.

 

[backbreaker]

I just read the first post and one more post by the OP. I don't see what is so good about this.

This girl flaked out and gave you an excuse about her ex bf. This means that she is still talking/fkng this dude. and then she runs to you and you reward this girl with some d!ck? You should have told that girl to go to her ex and to leave you the hell alone. (AJ logically thinking).

But most dudes can't control their d!ck so whatever. Hit this girl once and kick her butt to the curb because their is no reason she can be long term material unless she is breaking bread. (This is what I would have done)

Then you actually spend money on her and take her out?? That's crazy. (This is what happens to people who can't control their d!ck!)

Value your d1ck fellas.

That's my two cents. I will read more in the thread if I missed something.

lol bro read the rest of the post. he's doing the damn thing now.

 

[spiegel549]

**Update**

Backbreaker I know your not an ******* bro haha, just blunt. I enjoy it the freshness of blunt advice.

I was put in a situation last night bro...the details on last night are endlessly long so I will just stick to main details.

I went out with my boys to a small dorm room party. Literally me, my 2 guy friends, and about 6 girls. After partying for a few hours I hear one of the girls say "Hey lets invite xyz over!" (the girl) and I'm thinking crap man...I wanted to keep GHOST and not see her until she was back! I thought to myself whatever man, its out of my control.

The girl comes over, and lit up when she saw me, gave me a kiss on the cheek. I was flirting with other girls, having myself a good time, partying. My buddy invites the whole party to head over to his house so we do.

The girl when we get there asks me if I can do a liquor run with her, so me and her go and when we get back and park, she jumps across the seat on top of me and starts kissing me (I was teasing her with Kino as she was driving)

So we go in the house and party, flip cup, beer pong, the works. Towards the end of the night since she drove everyone to the house from the dorm she asks me to drive her car, I drop everyone off and she goes "Do you want to come over tonight?"

The Judgment Call Bro there was no way I could of said no, no way. But I was cool the entire night and was like "yeah sure lets go."

Short & Sweet Details

We get to her place, and start going at it. All night we ****ed on/off.
I wake up in the a.m and she says "lets go take a shower" bro she washes my entire body head to toe, washes my hair and even when I got out started drying me herself LOL...

She makes me this BOMB ass breakfast, serves me all these different things.

After all that we go and lay back down and just kept it light and fun, shared a lot of laughs, had a great time.

She drove me to my car and she must of mentioned 3 different future plans "Oh next time I want you to come over and go in the hot tub!" "I know this great place up the street I have to take you next time you come over." etc.

Kissed her good bye, told her to have fun on her trip, and talk to her when we are both back from traveling.

Random Note

Somehow in between one of the **** sessions "dating other people" somehow got brought up, she was trying to pull out of me if I was seeing other girls. I was straight up and said "Until a woman proves herself to me to be with just her only, yes I date other women."

She goes "well I just want you to know I am not dating anyone else." I go "oh yeah what about that ex you said when I first met you." she goes "I do not have a BF, I am single."

Then we just started going at it again, and all of rest happened that you can read above.

I know I wasn't suppose to see her last night, but I didn't know that those broads at the party even knew this girl. Still I played it ****ing cool and relaxed the entire night. On my A Game. I know we had this power play set up but however last night turned into what it did, I get a positive vibe that last night did not hurt the current situation

What do you think BB??

 

[spiegel549]

Lol I don’t’ know why everyone thinks I’m an ******* I’m really not.

You’ve done, pretty much, absolutely nothing wrong. I would go so far as to say this thread should be sticked, not because of my contribution, but this is textbook how it should work. This is how you control frame, this is how you manage a girl.

This is all I am saying; you are going to have one of the best dates of your life next week. She’s into you, and she’s gonna miss you. She’s gonna dress up and look unreal, she’s gonna smell good, she’s gonna be flirty and touchy, you are going to have a great conversation, she’s going to **** your brains out. She’s gonna pretend to give a **** about the **** you give a **** about. She’s gonna like the same music as you. She’s gonna like the same TV shows as you. She’s gonna play up the good girl role because she likes you and she is dreaming of you and she wants to be with you.

This is the by product of running great game. You’ve pretty much got her. All I am saying is that, do not mistake what is about to happen, i.e agirl being head over heels for you, and her putting on her best good girl/interested chick front because she wants you with a woman’s datable qualities/character. Character is something that is judged in the long run, not a good **** and a girl laughing at your jokes. She does that because she’s into you, because you’v e done your job. Not because she would make a great GF. There is a big different. I expect girls to act that way around me because I blow them away. But it takes some time to judge a girls character.. how she treats friends, how hard does she work, does she use sex to get what she wants or does she enjoy sex? How she treats ex boyfriends, does she have any cobwebs that she is trying to hide, how is she with money? Is she a chronic lyer? Does she have a drug habit (you’d be surprised how many, and most can hide it for a month or so pretty easily)? Does she have a ****ty temper? Things are great now but what about 3 weeks from now when it’s a regular ass Thursday night?

Because what you are about to experience starting next week is dating equivalent of shock and awe lol. she is going to bombard you with everything you want because she had decided she wants you. But just because she wants you, doesn’t mean she is dating material.

Just wanted to add that this is a FANTASTIC post right here, makes a very strong point that TIME is the only thing that can/will determine if she is GF material or not. I remember one of my exes after 2 months completely changed how she was, almost like she was wearing a mask so to speak. So if everything continues the way its going, and I continue playing my cards like I have been, only time will tell.

 

[CaConfused]

Could I just text and say "plans changed. Ill be back around 8pm. Call me after"

 

[Young Juan]

When girls I've been fvcking (and have the upper hand with) want to confirm whether I'm dating other women or not, they either 1)Are starting to want me to themselves or 2) want me to start fvcking them raw w/o a condom. Obviously, if 1, you have to prove. I typically go with my 3 month rule. If she's still interesting after 90 days, I will consider going further. Obviously, character is what I'm really looking at underneath. If 2, you have to both get tested after deciding if she's trustworthy or not.

Just my experiences about what a woman's thoughts based on her questions

 

[sageproduct]

Please archive. This thread has been my Mid Game 101 course, seriously.

 

[zinc4]

bro you have a lot to learn


1. you dont' call a girl after you PIITB to "keep her interest up" lol you call her beucase that's the gentlemanly thing to do. we here at sosuave have a tad bit of class, and i mean, the woman just let you **** her the least you can do is call her the next day and say a few words. probably caught your load and all lol. There is nothing AFC about that at all in fact it's quite charming. You are missing the forest in the trees here. lol she let you **** and you are worried about keeping her interest up.

Understand what an AFC is. An AFC is someone who showers, UNEARNED attention on a woman. If a woman ****s your brains out, I am liable to say that she has earned a pat on the back or a doggy treat. you estbliash the reward system early on. you do something to make me happy I do something to make you happy. the AFC does **** to make her happy and hopes she does something to make him happy. But don't confuse doing **** tom ake her happy in general= AFC. lol that's not a DJ that's an *******.


If you don't call a girl after you have had sex she is going to fear that all you want is sex, and while some girls are in the back of their minds, fine with that, no girl i have ever met is that much of a ***** to just, let a guy put it all out there like that.. yeah ***** don't call me unless we are making plans to ****. that's not very polite, DJ, anything. that's a selfish individual.



2. this is somewhat advanced DJ tactics.. I eman pat your self on the back you got laid and that's good. But, if i have to use those type of silly ass tactics to get a girl in bed, that tells me a lot about the girl. i can't / dont' have time for girls that immature. not saying I have to have older broads, but that is an extremely immature girl who falls for bull**** like that. This is the girl that gets off on having her life a mini drama.

In other words, she liked you in the first place. The not calling a girl int he history of DJism has never sparked that level of response out of a broad. the girl did not **** your brains out beucase you did not call her. she liked you enough to **** you already. so with that in mind, what exactly was this entire play? who the hell cancels a date with a guy they like, just for ****s and giggles lol? a girl i don't have time for is the answer



anyway, keep on keepin on

This.....if you you really want her to chase you from the beginning then just text her or call her and say you had a great time with her...don't ask her anything...do this and then drop her from your mind...she will most likely be contacting you or ask you out right then...but there is a slight chance you will lose her but you will most likely be pursued by her...i like to take this route with almost all of my plates because it establishes supreme frame from the beginning...and shows that you are willing to lose her...and honestly, i am tired of working for women, i feel like they have to work for me...but this is me..

But.....if you really like her and want to play it safe...just call her and say you had a great time and ask her out again and repeat until you hook her...if you are any good in bed and have good convo going on then this should never fail...this is your safest bet...and admittedly the route i go with a girl who i actually really like...

And you should always call or text the day after the initial sexual encounter IMO....it shows that you are at least trying to act like a gentleman and that you don't just view her as a pump and dump....i mean this is basic stuff man...not calling/texting will hurt you more times than not...