Re:
The Trap of SoSuave or any Love site is that they HOPE to find the "truth" in the world. Some guide. Some light in the darkness. They seek an answer. The one crystallizing, missing piece that will help them make sense, give them direction, and a sense of self and purpose.
Lots of posts are dedicated to blaming the site, or congratulating, but why not point the finger at yourself when you fail or succeed?
Each guy takes what he wants from here, and there is no self-evident, universal truth about LIFE or WOMEN that you will find here, or locked inside the pages deep, created sometime ago by Pook, or Anti-Dump, or anybody.
It's in your mind. That's it.
The trap of sosuave is that men never unlock it. They lead a life on a path separate from what it is that's locked inside their mind and hearts.
They desire to be accepted socially, to lay hb10's, and forsake their true path. Or they forsake laying a few good girls here and there for pride, vanity, or their own ego's, just to FEEL the power of NEXTING a girl.
Every guy gets here by a different road or path. Some are dumped by an X. Some have a cheating X and don't know what to do. Some guys have never been laid and want to. Some guys want to lay more chicks and "up" their game. Each differing path reflects a differently desired outcome, yet 1 single source; happiness and contentedness.
They long for peace and control in THIS area of their life, because mostly, it's the one ALWAYS in flux.
And it always will be. There's no doubt there. Men press on and accept certain things in belief that somehow the problems will go away. That a LESS dramatic girl will arrive. That a mere copy of you will arrive with tits and an azz, and have the logical control we exemplify. Not happening boys. Never.
No, the Trap of SoSuave is that guys seek a truth, just like they seek in life. It may not be evident on the surface, but this is why MOST guys have posts creeping into the thousands, and several thousands. This is why NOOBS end up getting very HIGH with their post total, and spend countless hours here. Seeking the truth.
It's the great tribulation of life. Seeking. Never settling. Always going somewhere "other than here." Never happy with oneself. And yet, if you're not happy with where you are now, how will ever be happy with where you end up or with who you become?
Happiness is an eternal choice, it's not in what you own, who you date, where you live, or who your friends. That's only social contexts of the mind, by which your seeking mind continues to put you in pain. You've attached your definition of happiness to things outside yourself. Just like we do with love.
We pervert the meaning of love. Love encompasses all. Selfish love or infatuation says "I love this person BECAUSE." And then you provide reasons. But if the reasons change or fade, so does Love. So how can it be Love if those reasons FOR love can change? Love is widespread acceptance of a total thing or existence, not PREFERENCES for 1 thing or 1 person for any REASON. But people, women, guys, are sold this bill of goods with no means of payment in the foreseeable future.
So the bain Of SoSuave and ANY love site that has you biting for more is seeking a truth that does not exist. Guys come here and totally shread who they are to pieces, and sometimes, leave worse off because they can't make the change they want. Other guys come, make a change, and wake up realizing they never had to change to get girls. Only to awaken themselves that GIRLS exist and that GIRLS exist who will like them specifically if they just gave it a shot.
This is why guys always return to ask questions, big or small, smart or dumb, wise or foolish. They seek a truth. As if the woman will become perfect, or the knowledge will be perfect, or as if they will get to a place of Perfection and Settling. It won't happen.
Many enter the game for this reason, but as it was noted, the GAME IS an end in itself. It provides the player with what he seeks, the endless quest of fulfillment and settling, never to be found. That I can guarantee. Because the players and participants always change. The rules change. The landscape changes. But you never change. It's an endless conquest, like getting on a hamster wheel, believing someday you will beat the wheel and get your carrot. It never happens, though.
When you drop the pretenses of perfection and seeking, you can get on with REAL progress. But it's amidst this turmoil of searching that you can never move ahead of where you are. You're stuck, because you've entered the cycle of the game. There's no getting out.
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The best way I can compare the "mental mind game" this plays on a person was a little mental debate I was having of my own concerning finances and income.
There are those ambitious one's of us who seek to make fortunes, but initially limit ourselves based on what our parents make. Even the great Jim Rohn had the same "guilt" over it. He'd been raised in poverty and obscurity, and when he began making serious money, more per month than his family, a certain amount of guilt overcame him and he couldn't reveal how much he made to his parents.
I would even admit some guilt over it. Being half the age of my father, and making more and increasingly more than him because a guilty feeling. Especially because I went to college. But guess what?
It isn't about AGE? Or Job occupation. It's about VALUE in the market place. And if you're doing your job, and doing it well, and people want to pay you, then your value is high. That is why you get paid. But still, the mental battle is there if you're not from a priviledged background, or you begin making more than your father before you cross 30. Of course parents want the best for us, but still, when you return home for the holidays knowing you make more, and will likely make more in a few years than your parents, it does initially send waves through you. But it's a mental game, and to free you of it, we need to break a few IMPROPER thought patterns that lead to negative actions. Because until you do, your ceiling is set too low.
The same applies here, with dating, and the game. And women. Alot of guys HAVE wrong thought patterns. I do alot of thinking, and I sat down after having had sex and thought..."I have a lot of hopes and dreams. I do alot of talking and thinking. And here I am thrusting myself INTO possibly having a kid should anything go wrong. Am I ready for that responsibility with THIS person?"
It's over thinking a sitution, but I enjoy it. And quite honestly, REALITY sets you straight. Sex IS sexy, but it's also risky far BEYOND the scope of disease. It has the added benefit of emotional baggage as well as a possible child. And what then? You have 9 months to get your shyt together. Lots of guys talk of NOT wanting gf's, yet they hope and pray the Trojan company didn't send them the 1% of the lot of condoms that MIGHT fail.
During college, that happened to a friend of mine. He fvcked the young (senior in h.s.) friend of our's. She was up visiting 1 night, got tremendously bombed, and slept with my buddy. They used a condom, but his luck was that they'd always break. Whether he was stupid about putting them on or just unlucky at buying them, he always had broken ones. And this one night fling ended up resulting in this young girl's pregnancy. Because of their joint stupidity, they both agreed abortion was the right thing for THEM, and so she told him it was like $800, and so his piece was $400. Only, it was $400, or maybe 300, and she had him pay in full, or made some profit. The girl BECAME a total bytch, despite the fact she was good enough to fvck that night.
That was but 1 case. ALOT more guys get LUCKY after sex. They're not lucky before sex. That's just natural. The luck in sex COMES after sex is over. Because you never know if it's broken. Who she's been with. If she's on or off the pill (lots of girls lie, or don't take it regularly enough to be fully effective). Lots of girls just want to be pregnant now, despite the growing # of women in the workforce. Emotions do crazy things, and they don't have the benefit of CONTROLLING them like we do.
Food for Thought.
A-unit