This is a great post. Way to completely tear apart the AFC mindset!
However, I want to comment on several points. Some of these you might have wrote to get a specific point across though.
Girlfriend material women ARE available in nightclubs and bars. Just because you picked her up at a club/bar DOES NOT mean that she is only interested in ONS. Conversely, just because you meet her at a church/yoga class DOES NOT mean that she is interested in LTR.
Through my social circle, I've picked up few girls who RARELY (once every 3-4 months and special events like birthdays) go to bars/clubs, and they turned out to be just as *slutty* and non-LTR material as the girls I've picked up at clubs/bars.
On the other hand, I've recently met somebody at a bar who is very much an LTR material. She goes to bars/clubs with her friends to hang with them and have a good time. She actually told me the other day that she still can't believe I was able to pick her up at the bar since she *always* rejects a guy's advance when she is at a bar/club.
My point is, do NOT limit yourself to venue...whatever it is you're looking for. The place that you meet a girl doesn't define the type of relationship (ONS/LTR) you will have with her. The type of person she is, and more importantly, your interest in her will define the type of relationship you will have with her.
On the same token, some guys will RELIGIOUSLY stick to meeting girls ONLY from the internet (myspace, eharmony, etc.). They think that approaching and meeting women in real life is too difficult because they don't know what to say, they think women in public aren't looking to get approached, etc. whatever bull$hit reasons they can concoct up. They preach on and on and on about how meeting women from online saves them time, the headache, lets them choose better, etc.
While the underlying truth is that they are just too afraid of rejection from approaching and meeting a woman in real life. On the internet, at least, the rejection won't be as severe because they've invested a whooping 2 seconds in sending their cheesy message. The less they invest themselves in the process, the less the impact of rejection.
Seduction community does NOT teach how to form and/or maintain relationships where you are the Man. Maybe the community's purpose ISN'T to form/maintain relationships. Whatever the case may be, the fact remains that very few guys on here know how to act/behave after you get in a relationship.
And you know what the paradox/irony is? It's that to remain the Man in a strong relationship...all you have to do is apply the basic principles and mindsets of DJ 101. This is why being a DJ is a lifestyle, and not a set of tricks and techniques that is so profoundly advertised on this site and others.
If everybody embraced this mantra, majority of their problems will become trivial.
And the interesting thing is that you have to go through certain experiences in life in order to know what you want or what you do not want. This is why I get irritated every time some rookie makes an extensive list about the qualities he is looking for in a woman. It's like, what makes you believe that you WON'T like a girl who doesn't fit most of the qualities that you pulled out of thin air?
Again, A+ post! Outstanding work, my friend. I just wanted to share some of my thoughts regarding those things above.
However, I want to comment on several points. Some of these you might have wrote to get a specific point across though.
The part in bold, I believe, is a HUGE misunderstanding that almost everyone on here has. As I said before, you might have wrote this to get a point across and if you have, then I'm glad we're on the same page. If not, then here is my thinking:Craig Reeves said:10. You're Pursuing the Wrong Women
People don't talk about this one much. However, it is one of the more common causes of lonliness, and could very well be the reason you have no woman in your life. You are pursuing women that you *know* aren't compatible with you. Women you *know* are in no position for a relationship. Women you know for a fact will only hurt you. A lot of this can come from not know what you want, which is actually something else I'll mention later on. You want a relationship with a woman yet you're only going to nightclubs and pursuing women that are only interested in a one-night hookup, or you're looking for a sexy fling yet you're pursuing women in churches or yoga classes. You have to know what you want and what you don't want or you're going to keep on pursuing women that will not get you what you want. Remember guys, if you want a girlfriend, the girlfriend you are purusing has to be girlfriend material, interested and available.
Girlfriend material women ARE available in nightclubs and bars. Just because you picked her up at a club/bar DOES NOT mean that she is only interested in ONS. Conversely, just because you meet her at a church/yoga class DOES NOT mean that she is interested in LTR.
Through my social circle, I've picked up few girls who RARELY (once every 3-4 months and special events like birthdays) go to bars/clubs, and they turned out to be just as *slutty* and non-LTR material as the girls I've picked up at clubs/bars.
On the other hand, I've recently met somebody at a bar who is very much an LTR material. She goes to bars/clubs with her friends to hang with them and have a good time. She actually told me the other day that she still can't believe I was able to pick her up at the bar since she *always* rejects a guy's advance when she is at a bar/club.
My point is, do NOT limit yourself to venue...whatever it is you're looking for. The place that you meet a girl doesn't define the type of relationship (ONS/LTR) you will have with her. The type of person she is, and more importantly, your interest in her will define the type of relationship you will have with her.
Exactly! Another term for this is "buffers" against rejection. Some guys will AVOID the club/bar scene like a plague simply because they believe that they don't stand a chance AND they falsely believe that girls at clubs/bars are not girlfriend material.8. You Avoid Taking Risks Because You Don't Think It's Going to Work
This is very common. Many times you don't want to try something new simply because of the fact that it's new. You read the books, you go to the seminars and workshops, but for some reason you don't choose to do them. And WHY? What I've found over the years is that anything you learn that involves risking rejection, you are CONVINCED that it will not work. OR...at least not work for YOU. The point here though is that you're convinced that *nothing* is going to work that involves risking rejection. Therefore, you've devoted your entire life to seeking out a system that completely removes the risk of rejection or suspicion from women that you're "gaming" them, or "using some kind of technique" on them. The problem, however, is that there is no such system and there never will be. You are just going to have to realize that no matter what, the risk factors for this game still exist. No matter how much training you get for instance, skateboarding will always be a dangerous sport. Apply that same principle to dating.
On the same token, some guys will RELIGIOUSLY stick to meeting girls ONLY from the internet (myspace, eharmony, etc.). They think that approaching and meeting women in real life is too difficult because they don't know what to say, they think women in public aren't looking to get approached, etc. whatever bull$hit reasons they can concoct up. They preach on and on and on about how meeting women from online saves them time, the headache, lets them choose better, etc.
While the underlying truth is that they are just too afraid of rejection from approaching and meeting a woman in real life. On the internet, at least, the rejection won't be as severe because they've invested a whooping 2 seconds in sending their cheesy message. The less they invest themselves in the process, the less the impact of rejection.
Bingo!5. You Don't Know How to Form Relationships
Perhaps you may not seem to have a problem meeting women, but you do have a problem with forming relationships with them that could lead to something deeper. You've probably been put in the friend zone so many times, or you've tried to pursue something romantic with a promising target but you only have it blow up in your face. You just can't "get the formula" for getting a girlfriend, mainly because you don't know how relationships are formed between men and women; what has to happen from first meeting her all the way to a romantic relationship. Most of what the media, and what others have told you has been very wrong, btw. This is completely understandable, because if you are never taught, you'll never learn. Once you learn how to go from one step to the next, things will work out much better for you in the furutre.
Seduction community does NOT teach how to form and/or maintain relationships where you are the Man. Maybe the community's purpose ISN'T to form/maintain relationships. Whatever the case may be, the fact remains that very few guys on here know how to act/behave after you get in a relationship.
And you know what the paradox/irony is? It's that to remain the Man in a strong relationship...all you have to do is apply the basic principles and mindsets of DJ 101. This is why being a DJ is a lifestyle, and not a set of tricks and techniques that is so profoundly advertised on this site and others.
"Don't wish things were easier, wish you were better."4. You're Mad That it's Not Easy
Another reason why you might be lonely is that you are out of touch with reality. You secretly wish this game were easier, and because it isn't, you've decided that you were just not going to play it. You look at other guys and they're all having fun, dating women and forming relationships, making it look so easy. You then look at yourself and how difficult it comes to you. Your resentment for the game caused you to grow in hatred for it. Causing you not to want to have anything to do with it. Unfortunately though, it isn't about loving the game, it's about realizing that unless you're playing it, you will never get a girlfriend.
If everybody embraced this mantra, majority of their problems will become trivial.
YES!!!2. You Don't Know What You Want
A wise man once said that if you aim at nothing, you hit it every time. This definitely rings true for women. You need to know what kind of relationships you are looking for with the women in your life or you're never going to have the kinds you want. Many guys wonder why they never landed that girl they had their eye on, and many times it's because they didn't really have their eyes on them at all and are just mad the girl got away. This constantly happened to me when I was first learning this stuff. It's very important to not only set goals on what kind of relationships you want with a girl, but also what you want from the girl. For instance, if you first meet a woman and you want to go home with her that night, there are going to be different steps that you take to get to that particular goal than if you were just trying to get her number. The point here is that you need to know exactly what it is you want from the women you interact with, that way you'll know what to do.
And the interesting thing is that you have to go through certain experiences in life in order to know what you want or what you do not want. This is why I get irritated every time some rookie makes an extensive list about the qualities he is looking for in a woman. It's like, what makes you believe that you WON'T like a girl who doesn't fit most of the qualities that you pulled out of thin air?
Again, A+ post! Outstanding work, my friend. I just wanted to share some of my thoughts regarding those things above.