The *No Contact* Challenge! ( Read this if you just got dumped)

[vato]

You're right. I should be glad. I am glad that she is gone.

I went out tonight with a friend and approached some baddies - explicity chose girls that looked better than my ex. It went really well. Was a bit nervous to approach after not gaming for 3 years. Exchanged some numbers and instas. One girl passed by and told me "what a beauty" - that's a first . Going out tomorrow again and doing the same thing. Feels good after feeling like sh*t for a week.

A little update. Doing better. Was out last weekend at a bar and saw her sister, said hi and kept it moving. I knew her sister was watching me at the bar so I scanned for the best lookin chick and approached her and exchanged insta. I know it's petty but it gave me satisfaction because I know she will tell my ex what she saw.

Guess who contacted me the next day? She wanted to see me and work things out. I told her "nope we're done, you crossed the boundary of no return" and that I would never have a child with someone who has flirted with my friend (she was always pushing for marriage).

Moral of the story, no contact and working on yourself works.

 

[soulforge]

View attachment 12190

A little update. Doing better. Was out last weekend at a bar and saw her sister, said hi and kept it moving. I knew her sister was watching me at the bar so I scanned for the best lookin chick and approached her and exchanged insta. I know it's petty but it gave me satisfaction because I know she will tell my ex what she saw.

Guess who contacted me the next day? She wanted to see me and work things out. I told her "nope we're done, you crossed the boundary of no return" and that I would never have a child with someone who has flirted with my friend (she was always pushing for marriage).

Moral of the story, no contact and working on yourself works.

Weldone man.

Truth is, once it's broken it's broken.

Wether she dumped you, or you dumped her because of her behaviour, going back will 99% of the time fail.

I especially would never got back with an ex who has been piped down by only god knows how many other men.

 

[Foe]

I know it's petty but it gave me satisfaction because I know she will tell my ex what she saw.

I dont think thats petty at all, good move as far as Im concerned with the expected results but you stood your ground. Perfect play.

 

[soulforge]

I dont think thats petty at all, good move as far as Im concerned with the expected results but you stood your ground. Perfect play.

I don't think it's petty either.

Do you guys realise how many women will dump a dude, break his heart & within days begin posting pics of herself on social media having an amazing fun time.. laughing, drinking, partying, knowing very well that the dude she has only just dumped will likely see her social.

They don't care bro.. Neither should you.

 

[Dr.Suave]

And you don't think women haven't had d*cks in them before you met them???

Some men will say stuff like "No fue en tu año, no te hace daño". Im not saying I agree, but most members here basically live by that.

 

[soulforge]

And you don't think women haven't had d*cks in them before you met them???

You been drinking? Any point in what you are stating & what relevence does that have to my point regarding.. they don't give a fuk.. neither should you give a fuk.

 

[soulforge]

I agree with you that they don't give a f*ck. You always tell everybody on here that you don't want exes after they have had d*cks in them after they have been with you but she had tons of d*cks in her before you so what's the difference?

Huge difference.. Once she has left you, and gone off and got diked down by Tyrone, Jamal, Chad, They all jizzed down her throat.. Rearranged her guts. Do you really want to kiss that mouth again?

But you're missing the biggest problem... This is bad new for you Hacker.

There is a very high probability that once your chick dumps you, the next dude she had sex with, he had a much bigger dik than you, he fuked her better than you ever did, he made her eyes roll back into the back of her head.. He was bigger and more muscular than you & was able to throw her around & pin her down much more effectively than you ever could.

Now add to this, that she left you in the face place, more likely because she lost feelings.. Do you really want to compete with Tyrone if she ever came back to you?

She would never feel the same way about you again, after Tyrone ruined her..

This is why you never take an ex back, because she probably experienced things that you will never be able to compete with or she will never feel the same way with you again.

 

[soulforge]

What an erotic female fan fiction…now do the version when you are the actor

You found this erotic. Very worrying & telling about you.

 

[vato]

Weldone man.

Truth is, once it's broken it's broken.

Wether she dumped you, or you dumped her because of her behaviour, going back will 99% of the time fail.

I especially would never got back with an ex who has been piped down by only god knows how many other men.

She's the one who dumped me after all the BS that happened. I'd rather drag my balls through broken glass than go back to her. Going out tonight and tomorrow to keep this momentum going.

 

[colouredpainting761]

Day 37

Had a LDR for around 9 months and we did not officially end it but she was taking longer and longer to respond to my messages for around 2 weeks, blaming it on “family”. She started playing up so i just said ok cool and goodnight. That was it. My intuition has turned out to be right, but it sucks. Was just going to message to see how she was but I know I’ll just get some cold ass response like “why are you messaging me” or just no response at all, so **** her. Women tend to get over break ups MUCH faster than men.

 

[Barrister]

Day 37

Had a LDR for around 9 months and we did not officially end it but she was taking longer and longer to respond to my messages for around 2 weeks, blaming it on “family”. She started playing up so i just said ok cool and goodnight. That was it. My intuition has turned out to be right, but it sucks. Was just going to message to see how she was but I know I’ll just get some cold ass response like “why are you messaging me” or just no response at all, so **** her. Women tend to get over break ups MUCH faster than men.

Women get over breakups much easier than men because women begin the detachment process during the relationship. Generally, they begin "breaking up" with you in their minds months before the actual breakup occurrs. Men aren't wired like this. Men see the break-up conversation as the "end" and they are then recovering for the next number of months after that point. Women, however, would have gone through that process months before. It is why they can seem so cold in how easily they get over you. You are pouring out your heart to her while she has already moved on and begun fantasizing about her co-worker (or began banging them even).

Keep this in mind for your future LTRs. It will save you a load of grief if you can recognize this dynamic at play during the relationship and know it is time to begin protecting yourself so you aren't caught with your pants down.

 

[jamesfromhouston]

Women get over breakups much easier than men because women begin the detachment process during the relationship. Generally, they begin "breaking up" with you in their minds months before the actual breakup occurrs. Men aren't wired like this. Men see the break-up conversation as the "end" and they are then recovering for the next number of months after that point. Women, however, would have gone through that process months before. It is why they can seem so cold in how easily they get over you. You are pouring out your heart to her while she has already moved on and begun fantasizing about her co-worker (or began banging them even).

Keep this in mind for your future LTRs. It will save you a load of grief if you can recognize this dynamic at play during the relationship and know it is time to begin protecting yourself so you aren't caught with your pants down.

@Barrister do you think believe or agree with the whole dumpers timeline concept? The idea that the girls only experience the pain, dumped men experience way, months later when the repercussions of their actions hit them. Or no? (Inversely, dumped men experience pain upfront but are better months later).

 

[Barrister]

@Barrister do you think believe or agree with the whole dumpers timeline concept? The idea that the girls only experience the pain, dumped men experience way, months later when the repercussions of their actions hit them. Or no? (Inversely, dumped men experience pain upfront but are better months later).

No - I don't buy that. I do think women will sometimes have "seller's remorse" if you will if the man is doing extremely well after the breakup and begin to put out feelers to him to see if he still cares about her. Maybe a bit more than just bread-crumbing. But the same pain the man feels? Not even close. Their female brain has almost fully detached at that juncture.

 

[jamesfromhouston]

Keep this in mind for your future LTRs. It will save you a load of grief if you can recognize this dynamic at play during the relationship and know it is time to begin protecting yourself so you aren't caught with your pants down.

I think there is a lot of truth in what you say based on my own personal experiences in LTR. Reflecting back on some of my break ups over the recent years. In hindsight, some of my exes started to look for exit signs and were slowly detaching themselves but I was oblivious to it at the time. For example, one ex I dated was constantly looking for signs that I was not good enough for her. Increasingly, she started to keep score only to use them as reasons to break up ignoring all the good. Another ex, began reading into personality disorders 1 month before dumping me and trying to fit me into one because I was a more confident person. Whatever amalgamations they made, when it was happening and underway I wrote it off, downplayed it or ignored it. But in hindsight, it was so clear, the detachment had begun and they were looking for the impetus to exit. Your words are gold.

 

[Barrister]

I think there is a lot of truth in what you say based on my own personal experiences in LTR. Reflecting back on some of my break ups over the recent years. In hindsight, some of my exes started to look for exit signs and were slowly detaching themselves but I was oblivious to it at the time. For example, one ex I dated was constantly looking for signs that I was not good enough for her. Increasingly, she started to keep score only to use them as reasons to break up ignoring all the good. Another ex, began reading into personality disorders 1 month before dumping me and trying to fit me into one because I was a more confident person. Whatever amalgamations they made, when it was happening and underway I wrote it off, downplayed it or ignored it. But in hindsight, it was so clear, the detachment had begun and they were looking for the impetus to exit. Your words are gold.

Women will look for anything to justify their actions so they can "save face" with the outside world. They are also masters of bending the truth (or outright lying sometimes) to make you sound like a huge a$$ to anyone who will listen. "I had to break up with jamesfromhouston. He was a borderline narcissist with mommy issues and never let me do anything I wanted. He didn't let me be ME."

Good riddance.

 

[NSX-R]

Women will look for anything to justify their actions so they can "save face" with the outside world. They are also masters of bending the truth (or outright lying sometimes) to make you sound like a huge a$$ to anyone who will listen. "I had to break up with jamesfromhouston. He was a borderline narcissist with mommy issues and never let me do anything I wanted. He didn't let me be ME."

Good riddance.

Came from a break up recently and i did make a post about it where i keep it updated but many of the details that you guys mentioned are spot on . My ex started pulling the plug 2-3 months before we really break up but she was weak to let me go cause i was always indifferent. The first and only time i was angy when we break up , was when things finished forever and gave her a concrete reason to go . That being said though, i don’t believe it’s a woman’s fault but it’s because of our weakness as men and that once we enter into a relationship we stop being competitive and we become complacent.
Women are wired to follow and men to lead . That’s human evolution. If the man stops being a leader then the woman has to take the leading role, and they are not made for this , so don’t scratch your head too much wondering what went wrong .
The buyers remorse thing as you guys explained, that women get when they see you getting better after breakup , it’s not because you are a different person ( that’s impossible cause people almost never change) but because the women see the person that they fell in love with , the person that used to put his best foot in front when they started dating. If the woman doesn’t have any mental illness, it’s almost always man’s fault that relationships fail and everybody knows how weak today’s men are in comparison to many years ago .

 

[Divorced w 3]

Ah, you can see this one has a fair amount of skill in the dark arts. You aren't dealing with a rookie here.

Please, for the love of god, do not fall for this bait. Do not respond, and move on with your life.

‘Dark arts’… lol what a term. Maybe she was covering something up but the imagery of it being dark arts, lol

 

[DreamAgain]

‘Dark arts’… lol what a term. Maybe she was covering something up but the imagery of it being dark arts, lol

Euphemism for being a good emotional manipulator lol.

 

[manfrombelow]

Hey Dude. Try not to be so hard on yourself. Take it from an old-timer. This same thing has happened to me several times and they always came back. Only thing is... I was over them and didn't care enough to take them back (Including my ex-wife a few years ago) I HAD MOVED ON. and remember what the Great Yogi Berra said "IT ANINT OVER TILL IT'S OVER".

I was doing No Contact back in the 80's

How old are you, grandpa?

 

[vato]

Update:

She broke no contact.

I've been doing a lot better lately. (She still comes to mind, just in case someone comments: "u sTiLL cAre aBouT heR!!!!").

Went out with friends this Saturday to my usual spot. It's a bar she never wanted me to go to during our relationship because it's always packed with stunners. Anyways, I was having fun, laughing, dancing and socializing with random people.

The day before, I had approached an Albanian hottie and texted her to come this place.

In my drunk state I saw my ex's face in the crowd and saw her eyeballing me across the bar. I turned my back, went to my friends, grabbed a drink and just chilled until the Albanian chick showed up.

When Albanian showed up I sat with her, talked, bought drinks and homerun. Closed the deal.

3 am I get this text from my ex:

"I hate you, I hate you more than words can explain. The only time I go out, you're there right in front of me. I hate you, I wish I never met you, I regret every single thing I did for you. You don't even deserve this text. You knew this would break me. You knew it, that's why you did it in front of me. You don't deserve and have never deserved someone like me. So ****ing disrespectful. I've thought about you every day, I've missed you every day, I've wanted to text you, call you EVERY DAMN DAY. But you??? No, you're the wh*re I knew you were but didn't want to believe you were. But thanks for this. This was EXACTLY what I needed to actually get over you."

I didn't reply to this text. And on Sunday she sent me another text:

"I would never do this to you. You were standing in front of me, messing around with that girl??? Do I deserve no respect at all? I would NEVER do this to you. N E V E R. I've tried to get over you but I can't, but you? You're out every weekend and yesterday you behaved like that. I've been sitting at home every weekend, everyone's been out but I've been at home, I've been depressed. WHY AREN'T YOU HURTING? WHY WAS THIS SO EASY FOR YOU? WHY? WHY ARE YOU FEELING GOOD? WHY ARE YOU HAPPY? YOU SAT THERE AND HELD HER IN YOUR ARMS RIGHT IN FRONT OF MY EYES. WHY DID YOU LEAVE WITH YOUR ARMS AROUND HER? I HATE YOU!!!!"

I replied with "my intention wasn't to hurt you" and this is a fact.

She kept texting, saying things like "you were the one I was supposed to marry", "you were the one I was supposed to have my children with".

Then she blocked me.