The Marriage Goal

Interceptor

Master Don Juan
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Wyldfire said:
The focus should always be on becoming a complete person yourself rather than looking to a member of the opposite sex to "complete" you or your life. The main goal must be to get your life in order and pursue your goals in life. You're so much more likely to meet someone who will genuinely complement who you already are when you stop looking. When you look you end up trying to make every person you meet fit into a mold of your ideal person...and they never do.

IF a person gets married it should NEVER be because you have sought out someone TO marry. It should only happen if you've met someone already and you've got something that really works that you want to make that kind of a commitment to.

Great advice, Wyldfire.
Sure, we have to acknowledge that the vast majority of us WANT love in our lives.
But remember, Marriage does NOT guarantee UNCONDITIONAL Love for life.
Very important to remember this.

PLUS, Marriage ASSUMES that you are ready to consistently MAINTAIN the love, romance, and affection NEEDED for a long, healthy and successful relationship.
In other words, if you don't know what LOVE even IS, how can you expect your marriage to WORK?

Look at it this way...
Wouldn't you , as men, prefer an independent, confident, giver, and hot babe to be your Wife if you knew she had her Sh*t together?
Wouldn't that simple fact be much more enticing than almost anything else?
She was trustworthy, sexy, fun, and intelligent enough for you?

OK, then as men, BE that kind of person, so you can ATTRACT the same kind in a woman.

Be the person you WANT to be.
Not a programmed, insecure, self doubting drone. Who feels he "offends" women if he's attracted to them.
If you offend a woman because you're attracted to her, SHE'S the one withthe problem. Not you.
 

Bonhomme

Master Don Juan
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No man is an island to be sure, but the strong are strongest alone. Don't buy into the powder-puff idea that if you don't find your ONE by the time you're 30 and ASAP you'll tempt fate and risk a life of quiet desperation. This contrivance only serves the interests of women who's imperative it is to enjoy their party years in their 20's with as many Jerks as they can attract and have a stable Nice Guy who's petrified he'll live a life of loneliness and desperation waiting for them at 28-30 to marry and ensure their long term security.

Don't buy this lie. The man who is comfortable with himself and confident in his true independence is the one that women will want to be associated with and to share in it. How you handle being alone and what you do with that freedom is the real measure of a man.
Very true.

But not only does the poor sap who buys into the lie cheat himself, but the chances are he will (perhaps literally) cheat (not to mention be cheated on by) his wife whose shoulder he's always looking over.

The irony of it is that many of the people who have not gotten married until their 30s or later may be the best bets to honor the commitment they make if they do. One who understands the meaning of a commitment does not typically make one lightly...
 
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