A
AJ84
Guest
I hear both men and women wonder why the other shows interest then flakes. That behavior is not limited to women.1. NO. the frustration about flaking comeS from the ambiguity of a womans actions. how often do you hear men on and off this forum, say things like "why is she showing interest at first and then playing games!? wth!!" or "if shes not interested why doesnt she JUST SAY SO!!?" its the inconsistencies in whats being said vs the actual behavior
2. i repeat, mens dissapointments comes from realizing that all the rules and myths they once believed about getting a girl to like them are innacurate. how can you NOT expect a guy to get mad who went from nice guy virgin who always tried to follow the rules and be a decent guy to the women around him only to be lead on with nothing to show for his efforts , to watching the same "good girls" he chased after, get pumped and dumped by guys who dont play by the rules? i am not saying the former is right and the latter is wrong i am simply explaining what is happening is here
3. see 2
Anyone who thinks doing x will lead to y is going to be disappointed when it doesn't. I learned that the hard way. Life isn't a colouring book that we get to fill with our favorite colours, unfortunately. There's uncertainty and risks. Being disappointed is a learning opportunity to get beyond it, not wallow and stew in negativity and cynicism. Yes men should get mad when they get duped by a woman, but there's getting mad and moving on and then there's living in that madness to the point where every encounter with a woman is filtered to feed a set opinion. Then they post on sites like this, to try to influence others on that opinion and anyone who disagrees is blue pill, white knight, gay or beta.
I'm not implying that you yourself are stewing, I'm just saying that both men and women have been sold on a BS notion of love and relationships, in addition to other crap we are sold on.
Now that some of us know that, do we stay bitter about it or do we see how we can use that insight to improve our lives?