The Alpha Male Myth!

Imbrondir

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Originally posted by Solomon79
Also, as BobDobbs has pointed out, many (if not most) women cannot snare an alpha male. They may get a kiss or a lay if the guy is desperate, but to actually catch a genuine 'alpha' is something only an elite band of girls can do.

The others have to come up with a set of reasons and explanations to justify to themselves why they don't go for that kind of guy. 'He's too nice,' looks 'too boy-band,' 'has long hair,' is 'arrogant' or 'full of himself' etc. etc., when none of this is necessarily true. She just HAS to think it because the truth hurts way too much.

SHE isn't good enough to get him, because there are other women who have more to offer. Ouch.

So every woman has some kind of sliding scale in her head of what she goes for and why, and what she doesn't go for and why. Everything must fit into this.

That's why they are such b.itches in high school. It's very difficult for a girl to get her ideal man, with all her friends agreeing that he's a great catch. Women want both- somebody they want, AND somebody their friends will be jealous of.

That's impossible because women DO indeed go for different men.

Any man who has an attitude to life, and does not transmit FEAR, will do okay with women. That's only because fear implies that you think you can't deal with a situation, and that YOU think there's somebody out there who is better than you who is judging your every move. If you think somebody is better than you, then they are. There you go. Being 'alpha' is not a defined set of qualities, it's just real self-confidence, that's it. There's not too much science in it after all.
LOL

I think your post there hit the nail. This works both way offcourse. I was talking with an AFC guy about 'the bachelor' yesterday. He was speaking of how dumb all these women was. 90% of the chicks there was total bimbo's with nothing in their head. Not only in the tv-show, but all the most gorgeous women was usually the most stupid. Altough I haven't been watching 'the bachelor', I knew at once what he really meant. He knows he can not get any of these beauties, so he convinces himself that he don't want them anyway.

Guess women ain't the only ones speaking in codes :(
 

DankNuggs

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The concept of alpha closely trails the concept of scarcity. As an economic reference, the law of scarcity means that we have limited resources, and unlimited wants. How we rectify the splitting of resources on a macro scale determines our economic mindframe, and on a micro level, can dictate actions and values.

Women in general can likewise be seen in the concept of scarcity, not in a chauvenistic territorial way, but in the grand scheme of being sought after, being recognized for having value in some shape or form.

Alpha refers in my opinion more to a position, than an adjective. Which means that there is no "aura or air" to the person. It is simply a delineation placed on performance. The Alpha is similar socially to the entreprenuer is economically...Takes the greatest risks, reaps the biggest rewards, is willing to challenge for what he wants. He can be imitated, but those who follow will never be as successfull as he was. The entrepreneurs inherit the earth. How this is accomplished goes beyond simply brains or brawn, it is simply a function of risk and return....
 

myfriendblu

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Originally posted by Shiftkey
Since when is an alpha male some macho tough guy? I think you're confusing alpha male with jerk (along with 90% of this board I might add).

An alpha male is simply a man with every trait perceived as desirable in their society. Kindness and compassion are some of these traits.
Good Post, your right on the money...

When I speak of Alpha Male, Im more in reference to a human type of alpha male, not some chest thumping cave man who beats other people up. Not as a title, but as TRAITS, that all of us possess. Some just have more than others.
1. Being an individial
2. Being a leader, not a follower
3. having a "Plan" in life
4. Placing yourself first. Be selfish. Your goals, dreams and plans come before EVERYONE else's.
5. Taking care of YOU.

Basically, being an alpha male boils down to being selfish, being an individual, and there is NOTHING worng with being that way. After all, who matters most in this world? YOU DO. not your friends, not your girlfriend, boyfriend,not your mom, dad, sisters or brothers wife husband or children.

I TRUELY believe the one single trait that all AFC's have, is a lack of individuality. They place themselfs second, behind there girlfriend, and usually other things in life as well.

Think about it - Who really matters most. Who can YOU really depend on? Who can really help YOU out. When your in a jam, crisis, or whatever the task may be. School, job, getting laid, working out. WHATEVER in life it may be, whatever obstacle, the thing that matters most is YOU. Be selfish!

I think the first and most important trait a DJ and Alpha male can learn is to start taking himself as the most important thing in life. To be SELFISH.
 

icepick

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Originally posted by Shiftkey
Since when is an alpha male some macho tough guy? I think you're confusing alpha male with jerk (along with 90% of this board I might add).
Hey, that is exactly my point here!

This Darwinism stuff has gone too far. This alpha male idea really got me down in my "AFC days", but now, my eyes are open, and I see all these hot chicks running around with pretty-boys! WTF? I thought they were only supposed to like the Alpha Male? (*NOTE: I talk about the POPULAR interpretation of it, not the pseudo-philosophical stuff that you guys are saying, defining the alpha male as the all around good guy.*)

I thought the idea was dead, but some things still live on, and we have very stubborn and confused people running around.

Even here on the forums, we are still confused. People claim that women are "biologically" predisposed to like tall guys, or muscle guys, or guys with big jaws, blah, blah, blah. They use evolution to back up thier claim.

Mr. P reiterated in a post once that women only like looks because they advertise personality, and I think that is dead right for both sexes.

If you look like Brad Pitt, but act like your grandmother, she will loose all attraction for you, and dump you! Also, if you treat her like 'another member of your b*tch harem', she will just cheat on you, and you will be left confused "but I was the alpha?" (Unless you mind-f*ck her first, like pimps, etc. do, but that is ANOTHER story!)

Women, I don't think have quite the RANGE of personality that men display. Don't get me wrong, there is still different personalities, but maybe they just don't express it as much. So we think that looks matter more then they really do, because women's personality conforms to thier looks.

Even so, you will still probaly dump her ass if she starts acting like she has a pair of nuts. (Maybe not, guys can sometimes get desperate?) All that I know, is that when I find out that a chick acts manly, my stomach churns at the thought of her, no matter WHAT darwinian fertility theory, or male-seed spreading theory they come up with to tell me that I should want her.

I am through typing for today, feel free to respond to my semi-random thoughts if you want. I know, this stuff has been rehashed over, and over, and over, and over, again...but no one forced you to read this sh*t!
 

Francisco d'Anconia

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It's not about what an Alpha-male does, what matters is how he makes a woman feel. If you understand how a woman wants to feel, you can be your own man and still make her feel like a woman.
 

Julius_Caesar

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READ MY FIRST POST. jeez. I said all that. But actually READ IT! I said that you don't need to be the strongest toughest guy! the alpha male is, and I quote: "the male that can best with cope and control its enviroment." So, to all those people that think brawny guys are the alpha, once again, I quote:"remember the biggest brawnist guy can't do a thing against an alpha male who can call in the help of a bunch of friends. So your MR. Toughguy thing is false, its nessisarily the toughest or "hunkiest" guy that gets the girls" The alpha is, and I quote: "the guy with the most power." So Bill Gates and all those rich guys ARE ALPHA MALES! why? READ MY FIRST POST! because they can best control there enviroment, with money! But blah blah, there are alot of exceptions and I am not going to go through them because you wouldn't read it anyway! lol! The alpha male is the one with CONTROL! now sometimes, in a group, the one who can bench press the most, might be the alpha male, the one who can control his SPECIFIC eniviroment. depends what you are relative to because.....ah what the hell, you don't really care do you?

Have, fun being alpha! or not alpha! Or a german shepard! I don't care! yay!

peace (Ave)
 

Julius_Caesar

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To any one who is listening, icepick, my friend
 

BobbDobbs

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Originally posted by DjDreamer
There are no natural born leaders...there is no superior race.....................leadership is simply luck of the draw...
Nonsense. There are certainly the breaks of fortune that propel one leader ahead of others -- but as was pointed out in other posts, there are many leaders of smaller groups, down to the interaction of any two people -- one of which usually ends up being the more dominant in the relationship. This includes husbands and wifes, and it certainly isn't always the husband who is dominant.
 

Peace and Quiet

If you currently have too many women chasing you, calling you, harassing you, knocking on your door at 2 o'clock in the morning... then I have the simple solution for you.

Just read my free ebook 22 Rules for Massive Success With Women and do the opposite of what I recommend.

This will quickly drive all women away from you.

And you will be able to relax and to live your life in peace and quiet.

diplomatic_lies

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Originally posted by Solomon79
Also, as BobDobbs has pointed out, many (if not most) women cannot snare an alpha male. They may get a kiss or a lay if the guy is desperate, but to actually catch a genuine 'alpha' is something only an elite band of girls can do.

The others have to come up with a set of reasons and explanations to justify to themselves why they don't go for that kind of guy. 'He's too nice,' looks 'too boy-band,' 'has long hair,' is 'arrogant' or 'full of himself' etc. etc., when none of this is necessarily true. She just HAS to think it because the truth hurts way too much.

SHE isn't good enough to get him, because there are other women who have more to offer. Ouch.

Exactly! The same happens with guys. Rare guys don't want to be an alpha male - but everyone else is jealous, but most use excuses to cover it up ("I don't want to be a brainless jock", "He's up himself, I'm more independent", etc).
 
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Originally posted by 00Kevin
yep.. the meek shall inherit the earth but not the girl.
And yeah the meek shall inherit the earth and I will be there to push them down and take it from them!


To the non alpha male dude...good argument except:

1. just because your one of those skinny socks around their ankle dudes don't mean you gotta hate.

2. alpha male isn't darwinism, it's basic human programming. Females are programmed to look for the dominante males to increase the species with...sorry if your not one.

3: Here is some food for thought:


What a Woman Wants to Feel
Women tend to have more preconditions than do men concerning sexual
contact. They need to feel that more criteria have been fulfilled. These
criteria, these values, these keywords you should allude to liberally in
conversation, so that the woman has the sense that they are being met.
You should stimulate and induce them, using images and metaphors. You
should reinforce them, using Proof by Enjoyable Analogy. What are these
criteria? Here are some common ones:
1. Physical safety
2. Emotional connection
3. Trust
4. Destiny
5. Surrender to something greater than herself
6. Emotional variety
Physical safety is important to a woman because she rarely loses
sight of the fact that she’s physically vulnerable. Almost any male she
encounters would be able to physically overpower her. Much of the function
of her male mate is to protect her, and having a man who can defend her
physically tends to be important, if not necessarily consciously. Talking
about physical safety directly tends to produce thoughts of physical
danger, and might even make her frightened by you, so it’s much better to
talk about states of relaxation and comfort. These states imply inducing a
sense of physical safety, without making her think of falling off a cliff or
being attacked while walking to her car.
“Destiny” and “surrender” are particularly revealing, particularly
important. Sex can be so meaningful for a woman, so dangerous and
powerful, that it’s easier for her to experience it if she can disown
responsibility. She’ll therefore rationalize: Sex wasn’t her idea, it wasn’t
your idea—it just happened. It was destiny. It wasn’t planned—she was
swept away. Her passions were overwhelming. It just happened. It was
meant to be. This also reflects the feminine emphasis on the irrational and
nonlogical, and the belief that the Unknown easily sweeps aside human
plans. Women tend to believe that when something is unplanned, when
something overpowers human thought and intention, it’s more valid and
more true. In fact, the notion of destiny is so commonly applied that it
seems to be a built-in category, a built-in criterion, a built-in test as to how
she feels about a relationship. When she feels really really good about a
sexual situation, then it was meant to be. If she stops feeling good about it,
then it wasn’t meant to be—but, hey, there’s this really cute, really fun guy




she just met—and maybe…maybe a relationship with him is just… meant
to be… Surrender is similar—sex, for a woman, should be a matter of
giving in to something overwhelming—giving in to an overwhelming
passion, to something that’s so right that she has no choice in the matter.
At most, her only choice should be whether, or when, to recognize the
inevitability of the situation. Look, this is not the most pleasant of thoughts,
but in the real world, in practice, most women, to feel as strongly as they
wish, need to feel that some outside agency is causing things to happen—
that they are passive and receptive, and that fate, or destiny, or passion, or
an overwhelmingly powerful man is taking responsibility for what she is
feeling. She wants to feel that the thing she’s dealing with is so powerful
that she can be passive and enjoy responding to the rich variety of feelings
this powerful thing is eliciting.
This brings up another matter: emotional variety. Women like using
all their emotional muscles—they like feeling happy and sad and proud and
humiliated and wanted and unwanted. They want to you hit every note on
the keyboard, at least once in a while. If you only seek to elicit happy-face
emotions in a woman, she will feel bored. She will feel unchallenged. She
will feel as if the relationship is incomplete, and that she’s not pushing
herself and not developing herself. And the negative emotions she
experiences as part of a relationship often validate the depth and
importance of that relationship for her. “Oh, if he can make me feel
Negative Emotion X and yet I still love him, this must be a really important
relationship! This is the real thing! This is fate! This was meant to be!”
When a woman dumps a man, it’s usually not because of the
negative emotions he was inducing—it’s usually because the positive
emotions he was inducing weren’t strong enough. Now, as a side note, I
don’t particularly like these conclusions. When I was very young, I certainly
wouldn’t have accepted them--I thought men and women were pretty much
the same, and any differences were just products of culture, early
childhood programming, etc. But no—culture has a strong impact, yet men
and women are basically wired in different ways. Behavior that can seem
rude and pointless to men—that is, being a ****-- can feel like an exciting
emotional workout to women.
A woman tends to yearn for a sense of safety—she therefore is
drawn to “strength” (e.g., dominance), and often needs to feel that the man
she’s with is strong. Oftentimes “*****y” behavior is an attempt to elicit a
show of dominance from you. Because a woman wants you to be “strong,”
she will also typically provide opportunities for you to demonstrate strength
and earn her respect; she can do this by playing the needy, helpless, Lost
Little Girl; by teasing you and inviting you to tease her in return; or by
seeming argumentative, hostile, and uncooperative.



A woman tends to identify with the “strength” of the man she’s
involved with—that is, when he acts in aggressive, resolute, forceful ways,
it makes her feel good. That often also applies to “strong” behaviors
toward her; a woman often interprets your ability to be aggressive/ resolute/
forceful/ dominant/ obnoxious toward her as a measure of how well you
could protect her from others’ aggression, if the need arose. Whereas a
man tends to choose a woman primarily for her beauty, a woman tends to
choose a man because that man embodies characteristics she would like
to embody; a woman wants a man she would, on some level, like to be. For
the record, the practice of identifying with the strength of another is of
course a fair description of the structure of masochism—and female
fantasies often have a strong masochistic element.
She will often enjoy it when you express dominance, relative to
others and to her. Mocking her and using baby-talk both tend to make her
feel good—or rather, reassure her of your relative power, and thereby
make her feel good.
Along with emotional variety and the sense that she’s on an
emotional roller-coaster, along with the sense of surrendering to something
greater, women are often inspired by competition, and more to the point,
competition for a particular man. Remember, whereas men tend to be
interested in having lots and lots of beautiful women, having more and
more external experiences, women want tend to be more interested in one,
infinitely deep experience—that is, capturing a man who can lead her to
ever more emotionally powerful experiences. Therefore, as we’ll discuss in
greater detail later, women want The One Perfect Guy—and see
themselves competing with other women for The One. Prior to sexual
involvement (and the intense emotions which sex can unleash in a
woman), it’s efficient for a woman to rely on the judgment of other women.
Prior to sexual bonding, the opinions of her friends, and of other women
around you, have a strong impact on her. If there’s evidence that other
women find you attractive, you immediately become much more valuable.
Though men tend to be the ones who get up and march across the
bar to meet women, women see themselves as catching men. They
therefore respond strongly to rejection. When there’s a subtle rejection, or
there’s less interest than expected, a woman often has an internal
response of “I’ll show him! I’ll make this guy like me!” Finally, a women
typically has the sense that somewhere out there is The One—the perfectly
fitting guy, the one who can make her feel challenged and complete and
fulfilled, the one who can hit every key on her emotional piano.
Also, remember that a woman wants more—she wants to be
reminded that she can feel more and deeper and more powerful emotions



than she’s felt thus far. Oftentimes, simply alluding to the idea of
experiencing more will induce strong rapport.


Don't bother posting a rebuttal I don't check back over old posts. If you have something to say email it too me. I have one more article for you to read:
 

Bud Wiser

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The Key Word Here is "FEEL:"

Originally posted by Francisco d'Anconia
It's not about what an Alpha-male does, what matters is how he makes a woman feel. If you understand how a woman wants to feel, you can be your own man and still make her feel like a woman.
You nailed it, Francisco! "Feel" is the operative word here. And how do we want a woman to "feel?" Freaking great, that's how.

For God's sake, guys, keep it simple. Do whatever you have to do to BE FUN and share the experience.

Not one woman alive wants her man to be boring. Who goes out to have a bad time? Sick-o's -- that's who.

Alpha-schmalpha. If you're fun to be with, and reasonably well-groomed and in decent shape, etc, you'll be the alpha, beta and omega of her world in short order.
 
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Holding Out for a Hero
Women, even the most independent of heterosexual women, tend
to respond very, very powerfully to a primitive archetype: the powerful man. When women get involved with men they don’t view as “powerful”— when they date “nice guys” and “good providers,” it’s often because they’ve been hurt by guys they’ve found more exciting. And that fantasy of the powerful, exciting man is almost always latent, and therefore something you can tap into.
Mr. Powerful is the guy you find in romance novels. Of course, in
romance novels he’s always rich and handsome, tall of stature, deep of
voice, and broad of shoulder, but those, for our purposes, aren’t his most important attributes. The important attributes are products of belief and behavior, and therefore, things you can adopt and demonstrate, in a way that excites the women you meet.
What are the attributes of the powerful man?
First, independence.
The hero doesn’t need her. Moreover, he frequently rejects her in subtle ways. He often leans away from her and moves away from her, out of arm’s reach. His body language, facial expression, and vocal tone frequently deliver nonverbal messages of “I don’t need you; you need me” or “You’re not important” or “You’re not good enough” or “You’re disappointing me.”
Second, the hero has plans and objectives, a path he’s chosen for
himself. These things don’t center around her. As far as the hero is
concerned, she can stay or go. Whatever she does or thinks or feels won’t sway him from his path. If she’s really, really lucky—if she proves again and again how worthy she is—maybe he will let her have a place in his life.But she will never be the center of his life.
Third, the hero is determined. The hero knows what he’s doing,
knows where he’s going, and goes after what he wants until he gets it.
Nothing sways him, and he doesn’t ***** or whine about mistakes or errors.
Make it absolutely clear that your aims are the only things that really matterto you.
Fourth, the hero is greater and more special than she is—he
doesn’t put her on a pedestal; instead, he occasionally lifts her up to his pedestal, and usually just allows her to fantasize him doing it. The rule is this: He must always demonstrate that he regards himself and his aims as more important than her aims and her needs. While women love intimacy,when it comes to love, they usually want intimacy with someone they see as greater, rather than someone they see as a mere equal.
Fifth, he challenges her. In practice, this sometimes means
undermining her confidence--and as we’ve mentioned, when you do this,
when you subtly or not so subtly reject or downgrade her, she’ll often find it stimulating and energizing. Use the following formulas: “Too bad you aren’t/don’t X” and “If only you were/could X”.
When you challenge her or criticize her, she’ll often become
motivated to prove her worthiness. You should occasionally point out her shortcomings, and most importantly, contemptuously point out her behavior when she tries to play games.
You can also be challenging by being a) volcanic and/or b) remote.
To achieve the effect of Amorous Vulcanism, you should raise your voice, make melodramatic physical gestures, be impatient, smolder, glower.
Occasionally act very angry. Your intensity will reinforce her sense that, in being with you, she’s part of something exciting.
To be remote, use silence a great deal. Silence, in combination with
eye contact, is very powerful. After you deliver a script, make eye contact and hold it silently—this will usually encourage her to process what you’ve said even more thoroughly. Also, don’t talk about yourself very much, except in relation to your plans and your objectives.
Your silence lets her project her romantic fantasies all the more thoroughly. Don’t talk about your doubts or errors. Silence can have the cruel but useful effect of heightening her anxieties. And in worrying about whether she’s about to lose you, she sees your value grow. And in seeing your value grow, she feels prouder of the relationship and more fulfilled.
Perhaps the best approach is to alternate Angry Intensity with Cold
Inaccessibility. These behaviors, of course, are the sticks—the carrots, which should form the basis of your relationship, are the good feelings you create through regular verbal stimulation. As much as possible, say only things that will induce strong states in her—induce strong positive feelings, negative feelings, positive feelings—and not much else.
Pump up her emotions, and then give her lots of silence. Ignore her. When you do venture something personal or reveal vulnerability, it’ll seem like a reward, and a mark of how Deep your relationship is becoming.
Bear in mind, though, that when women complain about a lack of
communication, they’re usually upset at the lack of pleasurable verbal
stimulation—that is, the lack of those kinds of experiences which this report has taught you to create. When you provide regular verbal stimulation and feed her plenty of bubblewords, “communication” will seldom be an issue.

One might think: Hey, you’ve pretty much just recommended
behaving like a Neanderthal.
Yes. Bear in mind that if you ask a woman about the sort of behaviors
described above, she’ll almost surely describe them as reprehensible and very unattractive. What does she like? Well, she’ll probably say, she really likes nice, patient, respectful, loyal guys who treat her really well…
On the other hand, if you simply manifest the sort of behaviors
described above, she’ll tell all her friends what an exciting guy she’s met.
Review
Women find you more attractive when you display the following attributes:
1. Independence. You don’t need her; she needs you.
2. Focus. Your goals are more important than anything else, including her.
3. Determination. You persist in the face of obstacles.
4. Superiority (to her and others). You’re the elusive prize; she should feel
that not losing you is a challenge in itself.
5. Alternating Intensity and Coolness. On occasion, be rude, challenging,
provocative, and/or frustrating—it’s much better to piss her off than to
bore her.

Ice pick did you write the following:

The Romantic Predator

The sexual predator, that dark and mysterious figure, the "stranger", unpredictable, hinting at danger, tinged with violence... what is there that so attracts women to him? Truly, there seems something almost magical about those few men who seem able to mesmerize women at will. What secret do they possess that gives them this power, this intensity, this animal magnetism?
Users and manipulators is the key phrase. Such men have learned to spot and sniff out vulnerable women, the "wounded birds", the ones most susceptible to their particular brand of sorcery. They have mastered the art of "pushing the emotional buttons" of their fellow humans, exploiting the feelings and weaknesses of hurt people (and is not most everyone hurt?), playing women like a musical instrument. In their single-minded pursuit of pleasure, of self-gratification, they leave behind them a string of victims. These are haters of women, exploiters of human weakness, parasites, sociopaths*.
These ... fancy-grade hit-and-run drivers leave numerous victims in their wake...
Roger Shattuck, Forbidden Knowledge
This little deviation into the dark alleys of the criminal mind and the underside of human nature yields insight into the sad emptiness of the career seducer. There is little to envy in these creatures. They lead meaningless lives, and each successive "conquest" does nothing to fill the screaming, hungry void within. There is little to admire, considering the pain and wreckage they leave behind. We shy men can pride ourselves in being truly different, in being perceptive, sensitive, caring human beings, in being lovers of women. We are the ones who clean up the damage left behind by the monsters and the misbegotten. We bring beauty and healing into the world.


This is actually my banner that I use in the first paragraph...I make all new players at Players University recite it up to where the author says these haters...since he is obviously the hater.


here is something that might help you become a alpha male, an old posting by me from another site:
 
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"The Alpha male - I use this phrase a lot... Here is quick run down of what it means to me. If you watch animal shows on PBS or Discovery Channel, many species have a dominant male who has sex with all the females in the group, while the other males get none while waiting for him to die or until they are tough enough to kick his ass and become the alpha male themselves. Many males never get to be an alpha male (never get laid, let alone get to the pimp status).

Often it seems like you know guys who are always getting laid and other guys never get laid. You'll even see women talking to/hanging out/being friends with the average guy, but then sleep with some other guy (even if he is a jerk, sleeps around and doesn't respect them). The guy who gets laid is playing the role of the alpha male, while the other guys are submissive males.

I'm saying be the guy who gets laid. That guy is confident that he's going to get laid, because he knows he's an alpha male. He knows that women and people in general want to be with him so he doesn't shy away from conversation and meeting new people. He doesn't worry what others think about him when he's doing his thing. He takes control of a situation with authority. He knows he's fun to be with because he is always having a good time and therefore he _is_ fun to be with. He knows that if he is in a group of guys and a group of girls, he will be the one the girls choose to be with, and by having this to be the expected outcome, it is a self fufilling proficy. (Sounds like pimp status to me-ZenMack)

Ok here's, how I did the Alpha/Dominant Male thing.... First I created a model of what I thought a Dominant Male should be. Much the same as the one stated before. Then I used it to change my frame of reference about myself, ie I stepped into my model of the Dominant Male. I claimed what I knew to be my genetic right. nd I didn't care who knew it. I didn't make excuses for it either. I just excepted it as the natural order of things. This is not an ******d thing that you do but rather an inward change that radiates ******d in everything you do.

Being the alpha male is all about attitude and projecting the image that you are fun to be with and the woman should want to be with you. Being the alpha male is self perpetuating. The more you believe you are the alpha male, the more you become the alpha male.


Like I said if you want to respond send me an email.
 

Just because a woman listens to you and acts interested in what you say doesn't mean she really is. She might just be acting polite, while silently wishing that the date would hurry up and end, or that you would go away... and never come back.

Quote taken from The SoSuave Guide to Women and Dating, which you can read for FREE.

cestmoi

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Who ever said the Alpha Male theory has anything to do with humans? It's a theory about the mating practices among animals such as Gorillas.

The only reason why the idea got into the dating/seduction world is because it was used as an example for some traits for nice guys to look up to. Its simply about telling the guys that supplicate to women that women by their biological nature desire a man that is more agressive and powerfull than herself. Its only a teaching aid for AFCs to learn the basic chemistry of mating.

In fact alot of the basic rules and theories on here are for total AFCs. Imeddiate nexting, the 3 second rule etc... All are irrelavant to someone who already knows what is what.

Its not about displaying to guys that you need to become the single most agressive and powerfull male and get every girl and leave none for the rest. Its about adopting some of the alpha male attitude. Otherwise this would be a forum about becoming an alpha male. So don't sweat. Not such a big deal Icepick really.
 

icepick

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1. just because your one of those skinny socks around their ankle dudes don't mean you gotta hate.

2. alpha male isn't darwinism, it's basic human programming. Females are programmed to look for the dominante males to increase the species with...sorry if your not one.
No, you misunderstand me, I am not hating. Hell, I think I even agree with YOUR definition of the 'Alpha Male'.

I was just saying that I don't really think it is needed to act like you are Mr. BigManOnCampus.

Look, there are people out there that misunderstand the Alpha Male dynamic, and when I see the women DUMPING them because of this...well, that shows me that it doesn't work.

What a woman wants to feel:

(...)

1. Physical safety
2. Emotional connection
3. Trust
4. Destiny
5. Surrender to something greater than herself
6. Emotional variety

(...)

Holding out for a hero

(...)

One might think: Hey, you’ve pretty much just recommended
behaving like a Neanderthal.
Yes. Bear in mind that if you ask a woman about the sort of behaviors
described above, she’ll almost surely describe them as reprehensible and very unattractive. What does she like? Well, she’ll probably say, she really likes nice, patient, respectful, loyal guys who treat her really well…
On the other hand, if you simply manifest the sort of behaviors
described above, she’ll tell all her friends what an exciting guy she’s met.
I got no problem with this stuff. Being a 'neanderthal' is cool. I am far from the 'symp' that you think I am right now!
Women find you more attractive when you display the following attributes:
1. Independence. You don’t need her; she needs you.
2. Focus. Your goals are more important than anything else, including her.
3. Determination. You persist in the face of obstacles.
4. Superiority (to her and others). You’re the elusive prize; she should feel
that not losing you is a challenge in itself.
5. Alternating Intensity and Coolness. On occasion, be rude, challenging,
provocative, and/or frustrating—it’s much better to piss her off than to
bore her.
Yup.

I got no qualms with this stuff.

I will tell you what I am sick of though. I am sick of guys getting all bent out of shape so they can be 'top dog', I am sick of hearing guys whine to me that thier girl cheated on them, I am sick of these stupid kids making pathetic attempts to 'get one up' on me.

Ice pick did you write the following:

The Romantic Predator
Ouch.

I would never write such a thing! That guy would not be a sexual predator, if anything he does the women a favor.

I have a couple of questions to ask you:

1. Have you ever gone OUT OF YOUR WAY to insult/harm a guy who bested you in something earlier?

2. Have you ever worried about another guy who may be more 'alpha' than you?

3. Have you ever ditched a girl for days, and then scratched your head when you found out she was f*cking someone else?

I could go on, but I guess the main point is this:

There are people out there who use this pop-Darwinism as fodder for the fact that they obsessively compete with other guys. They think they are being the alpha male.

If you want to define "Alpha Male" by what you wrote, that is fine. I start to have a problem when people say that the "Alpha Male" guy is a nasty person, who always fights for control.

Then I look around, and I don't more hot girls bonking YOUR Alpha Male then DARWIN'S pop-Alpha Male, and I have to point that out.

You aren't nasty to everyone, are you? You don't constantly fight for control, do you?

I would probably go so far as to say you are NOT an alpha male in the darwin sense either!

"A REAL alpha male would throw his computer out the window, and go out and KILL someone and rape his wife! Argh, argh, argh! Grunt! Grunt!"

Okay, just kidding. But you get the picture.
 

Solomon79

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Look, it seems to me that the real issue is, what do WE want to devote our lives to doing?????

A lot of the guys on this thread are very intelligent and capable of a lot. The trouble is, the more 'capable' you are, the more difficult it is to find something to devote your life to, which you REALLY feel is worth doing - and this is where motivation and determination comes from.

If you can't find something to REALLY believe in, then you don't need determination or motivation.

Now, could I - for example - spend the next 7 years of my life trying to become the fastest backward breast-stroke swimmer in the world? Well, probably not, but even if I could, what would that solve anyway?!!!!

This is what I mean, it's not easy for a young man to decide what the he.ll he wants to do with his life. There are people who have these ambitions, with sport or music and what not, and I'm not putting them down, those are the things they are aiming for, but for many more pragmatic types, it's quite frustrating trying to find a role for themselves where they are testing themselves and using their full potential.

Seriously, these soldiers who manage to come back from Iraq alive and well, will be alpha to the day that they die. Once you've been in an environment like that, you learn to take each and every moment as it comes, regardless of what 'direction' you are going in.

Anyway, the point of this post: women totally underestimate a lot of men. Men are not always motivated by what women think they are motivated by. Some men don't see the point in spending their whole life chasing money. Some do. Some men don't see the point in being the fastest sprinter or the best javelin thrower. Some do.

Who's right? None of them. But they're all people who know that they are going to die. Because of this, they pursue their goals without fear, knowing there's nothing to be worried about.

Deciding what your goal is going to be is the difficult part.
 

cestmoi

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Simply beatifull Solomon79. Thank you!
 

Oxide

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But spending a life in trying to make the decision is not a good thing either. I have no idea what job i want to have in this life, but i know, that i want to achieve this

Learn how to be a DJ
Learn how to play guitar
Learn how to skydive, and try all the exciting things this world has to offer (no drugs)
 
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