Pettycoat Junction
Don Juan
- Joined
- Jul 22, 2004
- Messages
- 52
- Reaction score
- 0
5% sounds ****ty, but it really isn't. Think of all the other areas of life with a 5% success rate. When you find a new place to live you have to pick a place that has the right location, right number of bedrooms, and is the right price. 99% of places to live won't fit that bill. When a scientist creates something in a lab he has to pick a chemical out of millions that will have the right effect. You get the idea, there are tons of situations where you have a lot of filters that need to be used. Surgeons need just the right tools, and you need to meet just the right woman. You can't expect 'every' woman to like you because in this culture only a minority will like you back and be receptive to a cold approach. But if you're polite you can avoid alienating or pissing off the majority who aren't, and maybe make them feel more attractive while you improve your social skills.
The reality is life is filled with situations where only 5% of the things you are looking for (consumer goods, jobs) fit the bill. But because self worth is so strongly tied into dating people take rejection personally. You date to eventually pass on your DNA, a 95% rejection rate makes people feel like their DNA is worthless and not wanted by 95% of women. But thats not the case, its a complex situation with many factors. If you lived in a different culture you'd probably be alot more attractive to women, as attraction is to a large degree cultural. I have heard young white guys do alot better with women in some parts of asia, and I have heard heavy white women do alot better in some parts of the mediterranean. Even rock stars only get alot of sex and dates because they are surrounded by women who like what they have to offer. Send them to a different culture and they struggle like everyone else.
Just try to remember that you aren't approaching women to make everyone love you. The reality is the vast majority won't reciprocate your affection unless you're rich, famous or extremely attractive. You are just looking for that minority of women who you like, who like you back and whose personalities you get along with. But you have to filter through alot of women who aren't to get to that tiny number of women, just like you have to filter through alot of places to live before you find a good one, or filter through alot of jobs before you find one that fits you.
A guy who really, really, really wants to can probably get a date by the end of the day if he wants. Just approach 20-30 women, at least one will have the kind of personality that responds really well to you. BUt its emotionally draining to get rejected that often so most of us don't do it, myself included. I do do cold approaches, but never 20-30 in a day.
The reality is life is filled with situations where only 5% of the things you are looking for (consumer goods, jobs) fit the bill. But because self worth is so strongly tied into dating people take rejection personally. You date to eventually pass on your DNA, a 95% rejection rate makes people feel like their DNA is worthless and not wanted by 95% of women. But thats not the case, its a complex situation with many factors. If you lived in a different culture you'd probably be alot more attractive to women, as attraction is to a large degree cultural. I have heard young white guys do alot better with women in some parts of asia, and I have heard heavy white women do alot better in some parts of the mediterranean. Even rock stars only get alot of sex and dates because they are surrounded by women who like what they have to offer. Send them to a different culture and they struggle like everyone else.
Just try to remember that you aren't approaching women to make everyone love you. The reality is the vast majority won't reciprocate your affection unless you're rich, famous or extremely attractive. You are just looking for that minority of women who you like, who like you back and whose personalities you get along with. But you have to filter through alot of women who aren't to get to that tiny number of women, just like you have to filter through alot of places to live before you find a good one, or filter through alot of jobs before you find one that fits you.
A guy who really, really, really wants to can probably get a date by the end of the day if he wants. Just approach 20-30 women, at least one will have the kind of personality that responds really well to you. BUt its emotionally draining to get rejected that often so most of us don't do it, myself included. I do do cold approaches, but never 20-30 in a day.
