Sick of hearing about ex.

dark god

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I dated a woman back in 2013 for about 3 months..didnt work out so just stayed friends. Now when I say friends I mean maybe once a year she or I would message each othe just to catch up. Anway I ran into her again last April, started talkin and she said she wanted to date again..I said screw it lets give it a try a again..It was slow at first but got more serious around mid september. Appearenly she dated this guy for like a year who passed away (weird medical reason) 4 months b4 I ran into her. Now heres the thing she brings this guy up at LEAST once a day. Now I understand she was hurt but its been over a year now and frankly Im tired of hearing about him. I mean if she wasnt ready to date and is still morning why get involved with me? Shes been with me for over 4 months now and Im sick of hearing his name. My question is am I being too cold hearted or am I right?
Thoughts?
 

Billtx49

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She’s using you as her emotional healing tampon. Once she’s done healing, you’re most likely gone. You’re right in your evaluation that she’s not ready to date yet…
Classic case of back burner guy promoted to front burner as needed.
 

dark god

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She’s using you as her emotional healing tampon. Once she’s done healing, you’re most likely gone. You’re right in your evaluation that she’s not ready to date yet…
I will screw ur head up more: 2 months ago she tells me she had a dream about the ex and how he came to see her. When he was departing said dream she was "Babe dont go!" ...I felt like chopped liver
 

derby1

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Shes been alpha widowed Literally,

there is a shrine setup to the guy in her head, and you will never match up to any of her idealistic views of him, where she uses her reminiscing card.

Dangerous waters, and theres nothing you can do.

Also shes taught herself she can dump you for 7 years and youll be ready to be a B/F at the drop of a hat. Believe me when I say this, women will do that forever....they will literally check in every few years, then lose interest.
 

Robert28

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I can’t remember the last time I met a woman who hadn’t just become single or didn’t tell sob stories about their recent ex. It’s like they become alpha widowed and THEN decide to cross my path.
 

dark god

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Shes been alpha widowed Literally,

there is a shrine setup to the guy in her head, and you will never match up to any of her idealistic views of him, where she uses her reminiscing card.

Dangerous waters, and theres nothing you can do.

Also shes taught herself she can dump you for 7 years and youll be ready to be a B/F at the drop of a hat. Believe me when I say this, women will do that forever....they will literally check in every few years, then lose interest.
How do you know she dumped me 7 years ago lol..but yea she did..dumped me hard..for another guy..yea i know Im a idiot.
 

2Rocky

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How do you know she dumped me 7 years ago lol..but yea she did..dumped me hard..for another guy..yea i know Im a idiot.
So where is your backup for her now? You should have a backup/prospect/plate number on speed dial and call her before she gets the words "Goodbye" out of her mouth.....

Exes don't get second chances at monogamy...
 

Krueg

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Hopefully you learned your lesson! Now time to start moving forward.
 

Tell her a little about yourself, but not too much. Maintain some mystery. Give her something to think about and wonder about when she's at home.

Quote taken from The SoSuave Guide to Women and Dating, which you can read for FREE.

Dr.Suave

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I would never go back to an ex. But at least I assume you are getting a bunch of sex out of this.
 

metalwater

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You assumed wrong (hangs head)
no sex.. get out now. she is doing bad stuff to you; again. she is literally stealing more of your life.

the only type of ex that we might take back is if we dumped her. if she dumped us for another guy, we NEVER take her back. it rots our soul and kills our heart. literally. get out now.
 

dark god

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no sex.. get out now. she is doing bad stuff to you; again. she is literally stealing more of your life.

the only type of ex that we might take back is if we dumped her. if she dumped us for another guy, we NEVER take her back. it rots our soul and kills our heart. literally. get out now.
Well Im gettin sex but not what Im used too..5 minute mediocore Bj's..standard missionary position..maybe once a day...If I didnt push the issue we would have sex like once a week like we were a old married couple.
 

You essentially upped your VALUE in her eyes by showing her that, if she wants you, she has to at times do things that you like to do. You are SOMETHING after all. You are NOT FREE. If she wants to hang with you, it's going to cost her something — time, effort, money.

Quote taken from The SoSuave Guide to Women and Dating, which you can read for FREE.

Dr.Suave

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Well Im gettin sex but not what Im used too..5 minute mediocore Bj's..standard missionary position..maybe once a day...If I didnt push the issue we would have sex like once a week like we were a old married couple.
You have to "push" the issue? One one hand, maybe once a day is more than you could get if you were single and spinning plates. On the other hand, the sex sound mediocre and she should want sex more or less as much as you do, otherwise, in my experience, its not gonna end well.
 

metalwater

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Well Im gettin sex but not what Im used too..5 minute mediocore Bj's..standard missionary position..maybe once a day...If I didnt push the issue we would have sex like once a week like we were a old married couple.
ok, still not perfect for all the other reasons. but I thought you meant NO sex and complete refusal.

do you want to improve the situation with who you have or find another woman? or both...?

her talking about her ex all the time and letting you know she is missing him... is not good for you. that will suck the life out of you.
 

Rakeboy

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your a rebound, like what my main plate did to me this January. The ugly thing for being a rebound is you was used as an emotionally tampon however, you also use her for sexual gratification and thats quits! The only thing you can do is move on, improve yourself and spin plates.
 

dark god

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You have to "push" the issue? One one hand, maybe once a day is more than you could get if you were single and spinning plates. On the other hand, the sex sound mediocre and she should want sex more or less as much as you do, otherwise, in my experience, its not gonna end well.
[/QUO
ok, still not perfect for all the other reasons. but I thought you meant NO sex and complete refusal.

do you want to improve the situation with who you have or find another woman? or both...?

her talking about her ex all the time and letting you know she is missing him... is not good for you. that will suck the life out of you.
I finally told her I'm tired about hearing about this guy..I'm mean he's been dead for a year now..if she had a problem with that then kick rocks..she shut up and stuck around..go figure
 

Glassguy

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I finally told her I'm tired about hearing about this guy..I'm mean he's been dead for a year now..if she had a problem with that then kick rocks..she shut up and stuck around..go figure
And what are you going to do when she brings him up again?
 

Well I'm here to tell you there is such a magic wand. Something that will make you almost completely irresistible to any woman you "point it" at. Something guaranteed to fill your life with love, romance, and excitement.

Quote taken from The SoSuave Guide to Women and Dating, which you can read for FREE.

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