she's done a cancel on me...

horaholic

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chance- said:
Like he said, why would any girl in her right mind keep calling a guy everyday and calling him hunni or babe or darling if they weren't serious about it?
What fvcking planet are you living on? That was the most AFC statement I've heard all week! Girls do that with their girlfriends! It means nothing at all.

I wouldnt go jump to the conclusion that she blew him off to bang another dude, but the op is definitely sinking into the friendzone, and its not the chicks fault, its his own. He didnt strike while the iron was hot, and if she had real interest, it is turning into a friendship real fast. There MIGHT still be a chance, if he can get her alone, build attraction, and properly escalate. other than taht, I think ganji games are in order here.

If she had interest, he would have been invited to the birthday party, or she would have met him later on.
 

tony-montana

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this is such bullsh!t. as if she would invite me to her brothers bday party. we've never met. she can't just bring a stranger from the internet on the first meet to a party! and whats this strike while the iron is hot crap. theres only so much you can say or do from a phone call and i've made it clear i am sexually attracted to her.. she now knows i want to make out with her. massage her topless. i cant keep sayin dirty sh!t to her on the phone.


WTF AM I MEANT TO DO WHEN SHE CALLS ME EVERYDAY THEN!? NOT ANSWER? THAT'LL FUK IT UP! WHY DO I GET ALL THE FUKED UP CHIX? I DONT LIKE ACTING LIKE A FUKING A$$HOLE LIKE MOST OF YOU .. SLEAZING AND PLAYIN. i swear to god if this fuking b!tch is messing with my head i will go nuts at her.

ALTHOUGH I DO AGREE THAT SHE SHOULD OF AT LEAST RESCHEDUELE OUR DATE. SHE HAS NOT ONCE SAID LETS DO IT ON THIS DAY OR WHATEVER. SHE JUST KEEPS SAYING. DONT WORRY WE WILL MEET.

please someone fuking help me. shes gonna keep caling me every fuking day and night with this love dove sh!t and i can't take it no more. i dont wanna do this sh!t until she decides to meet. then she can call me. help please someone... i havent been on a fuking date in a long time. i get attached easy and not to mention ive just moved and have no friends where i am!
 

nismo-4

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Seriously, you need to chalk this up as a loss and move the hell on. She flaked. You fed an attention wh**e. She's just not that into you.
 
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tony-montana said:
this is such bullsh!t. as if she would invite me to her brothers bday party. we've never met. she can't just bring a stranger from the internet on the first meet to a party! and whats this strike while the iron is hot crap. theres only so much you can say or do from a phone call and i've made it clear i am sexually attracted to her.. she now knows i want to make out with her. massage her topless. i cant keep sayin dirty sh!t to her on the phone.

http://img196.imageshack.us/img196/402/denialariverinegypt230x.jpg

You need to reach the point when an internet girl flakes you NEXT her unless she calls with a time to meet up. Just tell her "let me know when you find time to meet. later"

Then forget her and find a new one.
 

horaholic

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tony-montana said:
this is such bullsh!t. as if she would invite me to her brothers bday party. we've never met. she can't just bring a stranger from the internet on the first meet to a party! and whats this strike while the iron is hot crap. theres only so much you can say or do from a phone call and i've made it clear i am sexually attracted to her.. she now knows i want to make out with her. massage her topless. i cant keep sayin dirty sh!t to her on the phone.


WTF AM I MEANT TO DO WHEN SHE CALLS ME EVERYDAY THEN!? NOT ANSWER? THAT'LL FUK IT UP! WHY DO I GET ALL THE FUKED UP CHIX? I DONT LIKE ACTING LIKE A FUKING A$$HOLE LIKE MOST OF YOU .. SLEAZING AND PLAYIN. i swear to god if this fuking b!tch is messing with my head i will go nuts at her.

ALTHOUGH I DO AGREE THAT SHE SHOULD OF AT LEAST RESCHEDUELE OUR DATE. SHE HAS NOT ONCE SAID LETS DO IT ON THIS DAY OR WHATEVER. SHE JUST KEEPS SAYING. DONT WORRY WE WILL MEET.

please someone fuking help me. shes gonna keep caling me every fuking day and night with this love dove sh!t and i can't take it no more. i dont wanna do this sh!t until she decides to meet. then she can call me. help please someone... i havent been on a fuking date in a long time. i get attached easy and not to mention ive just moved and have no friends where i am!

First of all, dude, you never mentioned that you havent even met yet... Not to mention the fact that that makes this situation totally weird. She calls you every day, and calls you pet names, and you havent even met in person??? If she thinks she knows you that well, even though you haven't met, she shouldnt have had a problem inviting you to her brothers party. Thats what parties are for, to meet new people, right? And if it wasn't that kind of party, it should have ended earlier and she could have met you later. Seems to me, that she didnt want to.

And no, if you havent met in person, obviously my 'strike while the irons hot' advice doesnt apply, even though you can very well be putting yourself in the friendzone by talking to her on the phone all the time. Thats what she does with her FRIENDS. If you're ever in this situation again, keep the phone convos down to a minimum. Talk to her enough so she feels comfortable with you, and trusts you, and keep it to a bare minimum after that. DD says "Give her the gift of missing you." Dont be afraid to say "if you want to talk to me, it needs to be in person, Im sick of this phone only, crap." (c+f style, obviously)
 

tony-montana

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okay. i woke up and she was on msn. msg'ed me saying how are you. asked what i was doin today. i said "jack sh!t." she said shes goin shopping and relaxing... wtf? still doesnt offer to meet. i just said "come relax over mine."
she comes out with this: "my moms got my car."

i'm not answering her phone calls anymore. i told you guys i wouldnt take this sh!t much longer. thanks for the strength guys. i feel better already. i gotta stop tryin to meet girls on the internet. its bad.
 
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tony-montana said:
okay. i woke up and she was on msn. msg'ed me saying how are you. asked what i was doin today. i said "jack sh!t." she said shes goin shopping and relaxing... wtf? still doesnt offer to meet. i just said "come relax over mine."
she comes out with this: "my moms got my car."

i'm not answering her phone calls anymore. i told you guys i wouldnt take this sh!t much longer. thanks for the strength guys. i feel better already. i gotta stop tryin to meet girls on the internet. its bad.

I see you ignored my advice. Meeting chics over the internet is fine but you blew it. Right after she flaked you should have said

"let me know when you find time to meet. later"


But instead you stalked her with different accounts. No wonder she wont go out with you.
 

Vypros

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Sorry you're going through this man. We've all been there, and I tell you, it sucks. Because on the logic side of things we believe that because she's continously calling us and making the moves to communicate with us that it means she likes us.

WRONG!

It doesn't matter how many times a day she calls you. It doesn't matter what pet name she comes up with. All those things that lead you to logically believe she's into you? Toss them out the fvcking window right now because they are horsesh1t.

My thoughts as I was reading this thread? FRIENDZONE. And with your last post, I think you pretty much confirmed that.

Always, always keep it in the forefront of your mind that actions speak louder than words. Always. It doesn't matter WHAT she is telling you. What matters is what she DOES to you (or with you). That's all that matters in this game. Train yourself to forget about the things she's telling you and to focus on the way she's RESPONDING to you. Her words mean about as much as the weekly gossip column. (I mean, it's no coincidence that women say twice as many words as men do in a given day...and most men I know of talk out their ass all the time....so this means that women do it twice as much)

Actions. Your life should revolve around that word. Take action. Read her reaction. Take action. Read her reaction. And tone the rest of the stuff out.

Also, think of it like this...if she's calling you five times a day and you are ANSWERING, what does that tell her about you? Whether she realizes it consciously or subsconsciously, it tells her that you HAVE NOTHING ELSE GOING ON. How interesting can you be if you have all this time available to listen to her or talk to her.

My advice to you to avoid the friendzone in the future is to not talk to her longer than 10 minutes at any given time until you are ON THE DATE with her. Getting into the habit of having conversations with her on the phone (and IM/Email) is only hurting your chances of getting a date with her. And let's be honest, how much time do you REALLY want to spend on the phone anyway? You're a man. Most men I know can't stand talking on the phone anyway.

Reserve the phone conversations until she's gotten something invested with you. Meaning, save it for the relationship when it becomes exclusive. Until then, you should avoid phone and IM/Email/Texts like the plague. Well, maybe not that much, but keep them SPARSE. You NEED that physical interaction in the beginning to get her invested in you (and I don't mean that in the "sleezy" way either...I mean that get some legitimate face time and some excalation before you are willing to give up that type of intimacy beyond phsical interaction).

This is a clear cut case where you need to set a boundary. You aren't her phsyciatrist, so don't act like one. You don't have to be an a$$ about it either. You just need to get some priorities BESIDES her going in your life and maintain them. Don't drop your life for her. Slowly allow her to creep into your life....as you slowly evaluate her as "worthy" (for lack of a better, less sleezy word).
 

tony-montana

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well it's true i don't really have a life. i dont work atm, i dont have friends where i live. just family. i only moved here a few months ago. i just forced myself to go for a walk with my dog before. for about an hour... bleh. im back home and back to square one. shes still online chatting in rooms. i can see. she doesnt know i can see though. so that means shes been bullsh!tting me. why would she lie about a "brothers bday party" ? wtf. women are weird man. anyway im over it. im not messaging her or answering her calls anymore. i'll reply to her msn msg later on and tell her to stop calling unless its to arrange a date. thats it.
 

nismo-4

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tony-montana said:
well it's true i don't really have a life. i dont work atm, i dont have friends where i live. just family. i only moved here a few months ago. i just forced myself to go for a walk with my dog before. for about an hour... bleh. im back home and back to square one. shes still online chatting in rooms. i can see. she doesnt know i can see though. so that means shes been bullsh!tting me. why would she lie about a "brothers bday party" ? wtf. women are weird man. anyway im over it. im not messaging her or answering her calls anymore. i'll reply to her msn msg later on and tell her to stop calling unless its to arrange a date. thats it.
WTF? You're still messaging her? Stalking won't help anything. Try another girl. They say there's plenty of fish out there...
 
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tony-montana said:
well it's true i don't really have a life. i dont work atm, i dont have friends where i live. just family. i only moved here a few months ago. i just forced myself to go for a walk with my dog before. for about an hour... bleh. im back home and back to square one. shes still online chatting in rooms. i can see. she doesnt know i can see though. so that means shes been bullsh!tting me. why would she lie about a "brothers bday party" ? wtf. women are weird man. anyway im over it. im not messaging her or answering her calls anymore. i'll reply to her msn msg later on and tell her to stop calling unless its to arrange a date. thats it.

Thats no excuse for being an AFC bro. Whats the rule next time an internet girl flakes before you meet her?

NEXT.
 

tony-montana

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well she just msg'd me then "hey hun?"

should i just tell her now? to stop calling me unless its to meet? or block her and stop talking to her?
 
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tony-montana said:
well she just msg'd me then "hey hun?"

should i just tell her now? to stop calling me unless its to meet? or block her and stop talking to her?

YES tell her:

"let me know when you find time to meet. later"


And dont respond to her anymore unless its for a date. dont block her just ignore her unless she says when to meet.

If you reply to her again after this you are a chump.
 

tony-montana

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Vlad the 1mpaler said:
YES tell her:

"let me know when you find time to meet. later"


And dont respond to her anymore unless its for a date. dont block her just ignore her unless she says when to meet.

If you reply to her again after this you are a chump.
her: hey hun
me: let me know when you find time to meet. later
her: ok
her: bye
 
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tony-montana said:
her: hey hun
me: let me know when you find time to meet. later
her: ok
her: bye


good... just like that. if she says anything other than a time to meet IGNORE HER or you lose.
 

tony-montana

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Vlad the 1mpaler said:
good... just like that. if she says anything other than a time to meet IGNORE HER or you lose.
her: does that mean u dont want to tlak to me


ignored. aint replied :)
 
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tony-montana said:
her: does that mean u dont want to tlak to me


ignored. aint replied :)

PERFECT. She has been PLAYING YOU. KEEP ignoring her. Ignore her for months if you have too. Sometimes it takes them a month of missing you to come around.

Dont blow this. You have the power now. Got it?
 

tonyy-montana

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yep. she'll probably call soon. i won't answer. and what if she does end up texting me or msg on msn saying she wants to meet one day? when we actually meet what do i say about my behavior of what i just said to her? just tell her i was sick of playing around?
 
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tonyy-montana said:
yep. she'll probably call soon. i won't answer. and what if she does end up texting me or msg on msn saying she wants to meet one day? when we actually meet what do i say about my behavior of what i just said to her? just tell her i was sick of playing around?

You are going to crack and talk to her before it's time, arent you? Dont worry about that crap. Tell her what you want. Dont answer her calls. IF she messages you and says she wants to meet or anything like that its OK to talk to her. Its OK for you to name a place and time. DO IT but only when she sends you a message saying she wants to meet.

If she says she cant do it on the days you say, use that line again "let me know when you can, later"
 

tonyy-montana

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Vlad the 1mpaler said:
You are going to crack and talk to her before it's time, arent you? Dont worry about that crap. Tell her what you want. Dont answer her calls. IF she messages you and says she wants to meet or anything like that its OK to talk to her. Its OK for you to name a place and time. DO IT but only when she sends you a message saying she wants to meet.

If she says she cant do it on the days you say, use that line again "let me know when you can, later"
okay. i promise i won't crack. i'll update when something happens. she's offline now. i never said anything :)
 
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