My current husband has ASD. He is an "Aspie". So are many successful alpha men. He heads a global team in tech for a Fortune 500 company, makes a solid 6 figure income, is an elite level athlete in an adventure sport, is an elite level skier as well, is tall, fit, stylish, very intelligent and extremely handsome. Does he struggle some socially because of the ASD? Yes he does. At dinner last night one of my friends and I were laughing about the adventures of being married to the spectrum. Her husband is a very handsome man who happens to be one of the top cardiac surgeons in our region...and also on the spectrum.
My husband is the furthest thing from a whiner imaginable, and I share openly here about some of the struggles that arise from the spectrum. That doesn't make him any less "alpha".
Perhaps you are not aware of the history with my first husband.
My first husband was a very successful nightclub owner running the most popular and well known venue in a city famous for nightlife when we met, dated, and married. His business partner was a friend he grew up with and knew since he was 10. The father of the friend and my first husband's father flew fighter jets together and were elite instructors for the military. My first husband's father was the pilot; the friend's father was the backseater. When the boys were 12 a low altitude training accident happened. The wing tore off the fuselage and the plane immediately flipped and spun. The friends father punched out a split second before my first husband's father, whose emergency eject trajectory sent him into the ground. The friend's father survived. The wing was found 3 miles away from the fuselage and the maker of the jet settled with my first husband's family.
Those two men had a strong bond (or so my first husband believed). My first husband had been through a tragedy losing his father; had seen the legal battle to do with responsibility, and had built himself into a successful businessman in spite of all that. THAT was who he was when we married. He NEVER saw the friend's treachery coming because they had known each other so long and been through so much.
After my first husband and I were married and expecting it became evident that the friend was mismanaging the books at the club. The ensuing business fiasco was ugly and my first husband was screwed out of the business in a very shady deal. My dad (a bad ass attorney) forced the partner to fairly compensate my first husband as the dust settled, but he never recovered from the betrayal of that friend/partner. He became depressed, lost motivation etc., but it wasn't that way when we married. He didn't drink at all when he had the club; thought it was bad form. Because he wasn't that way when we married I kept trying to help/be patient/encourage/etc. I thought he would pull out of it (the depression etc.) but he never did.
So take your potshots as you wish
@Divorced w 3 but understand you are taking things entirely out of context.
Obviously I divorced my first husband as a result of his behavior after it became obvious there was nothing else I could do, and I was not going to let the example of how to be a man stand for my children by staying.
The truly salient thing is that my son has developed into an alpha male himself. He was in leadership at his ROTC unit in college, has commissioned as a military officer himself, has gotten married to his high school sweetheart, they are expecting, and he has already started building wealth. He is respected everywhere he goes and amongst his peers and his elders. He following in the footsteps of his grandfathers, and sees his father's life as a cautionary tale.
He is 22. His wife is 21.
So if I've been able to raise a solid young man with the same principles I promote here I'd say my contributions might have some weight.
Very few here share as transparently as I do. No relationship is perfect and people all have their flaws. I share so others may benefit from my life experiences.
If you think that deserves ridicule? By all means please proceed.
Again. I was there. You were not.
