She never loved me..

[ChangePages]

Lately I have been thinking very deeply about the past as a part of coping method to move on with my life but lately the past has been bothering me. I don't even know how to put this in words.

Even tho this was my first girlfriend, it bothers me to know that she never really loved me to begin with. This has something to do with me failing, I don't like failing, especially in a relationship. Her not loving me just tells me that I failed and it bothers me. Women are so quick to leave and jump on the next guy that I know most of the people here know what I'm talking about.

How do you cope with girls never being in love with you? Do you care?

Especially if it's girlfriends you put in time for, only to realize she never gave a **** about you, she was just using you to begin with. Then for her to later come back and say 'I miss you I always loved you' ect. What gives.

I realized this is what makes most red pill men. So enlighten me on the process.

 

[resilient]

Change, you got to live life for yourself, man.

Women are chasing Disney feels. When they get bored, they ramp up their monkey branch schema. On the flip side, if you're never getting laid by her while she's bickering or giving mixed signals, gas-lighting, you start looking for better options.

I don't call myself a red pill man. I'm just not as apt to saving a sinking ship as I used to post-divorce. I know as I improve myself, there will be better options when I least chase em'.

Women compliment your life, not the sole companion we were brought up to believe they would be. It's a different world today, with technology they could ramp up branches with text, social media apps, and begin looking for the next challenge.

Unhappy women and society tell them they need to trade in the car for the bigger better deal. The challenge is finding the secure woman [to a degree...] who's heavily invested in you and doesn't want to risk losing you.

Remind yourself that you're the prize when you're feeling low. I'm in a similar boat.... so rise up and rebuild the confidence. DJs here got your back.

 

[wifehunter]

True love is extremely rare. It's the burden bearing kind of love. Selfless giving. Actions are the indicator.

You find it when you realize you are no better than anyone else (fundamentally speaking, off course... some people are smarter, better looking, more skillfull) True love is blind to those things, and sees the person as a unique and valuable individual. I recommend "The Four Loves" by C.S. Lewis

 

[Trump]

Lately I have been thinking very deeply about the past as a part of coping method to move on with my life but lately the past has been bothering me. I don't even know how to put this in words.

Even tho this was my first girlfriend, it bothers me to know that she never really loved me to begin with. This has something to do with me failing, I don't like failing, especially in a relationship. Her not loving me just tells me that I failed and it bothers me.

Failed at what bro? Girls just use. If you are useful to her, she will say she loves you. If you are not useful to her, she will say anything to put you down/insult you/get rid of you and make herself the victim.

How do you cope with girls never being in love with you? Do you care?

NOPE. Bro you should be concerned when they ARE in love with you. If they are in love with you, they will constantly nitpick about:

- your money
- your job
- your look
- your weight
- your friends
- and more

Especially if it's girlfriends you put in time for, only to realize she never gave a **** about you, she was just using you to begin with. Then for her to later come back and say 'I miss you I always loved you' ect. What gives.

Manipulation. They will change colours and moods and looks in an attempt to get want they want.

I realized this is what makes most red pill men. So enlighten me on the process.

The only thing you should do is your own thing and have the girl come along for the ride. Do you not rely on girls to bring you happiness, joy, money, wealth, security, fame, love or family. Count on them to have lady parts and you use those lady parts for pleasure.

 

[BeTheChange]

Me, one month ago: "She never loved me...derp"

Me, now: "Who gives a sh*t?"

One of the most bitter parts of the bill to swallow is the realisation that women will never "love" you in the way we as men expect.

But you have to experience it yourself to really appreciate it. You'll be fine.

 

[marmel75]

Oh, boo hoo.

You are becoming a grown man, you don't need anyone or anything, just you.

Go find other women more interested than she was.

 

[stevo]

Thank her. She did you the best favor anyone can ever do for you.

Women love their children and themselves but they don't really "love" men. Women don't "love" men. At least not in the way Men understand love.

Women love the emotions you make them feel and would easily go with the next guy if he sparks emotions she hasn't felt in a long time.

From your situation, it seems you were in her frame the whole time that's why the past is messing w you.

Stay at your center. Bring her into your world. Stay in frame always everyday.

You are now a man, welcome.

 

[Augustus_McCrae]

BeTheChange,

"Me, one month ago: "She never loved me... Derp"

Me, now: "Who gives a sh*t?" "

That's both awesome and hilarious at the same time...

-Augustus-

 

[EverSure75]

.

This might be how third world women view the situation. Obviously very few women and men have this sacrificial(kamikaze?) approach in the West. To them, relationships are more like a slot machine. You dont problem-solve a slot machine, you just find another one that might pay out better and curse the casino on the way out the door.

I live in the third world and I can tell you men have the same issues here. Feminism is on the rise over here too. We're still a few years behind you guys in the states but I see things playing out the same way here. Values are changing

 

[Floydispink01]

this bothered me also after my first girlfriend..

it bothered me with my second girlfriend.

Third girlfriend also...

fourth - less so...

fifth....less...

sixth, 7, 8, 9......No.

 

[BeTheChange]

^ That's not what I got from his post at all....troll.

 

[The Duke]

Lately I have been thinking very deeply about the past as a part of coping method to move on with my life but lately the past has been bothering me. I don't even know how to put this in words.

Even tho this was my first girlfriend, it bothers me to know that she never really loved me to begin with. This has something to do with me failing, I don't like failing, especially in a relationship. Her not loving me just tells me that I failed and it bothers me. Women are so quick to leave and jump on the next guy that I know most of the people here know what I'm talking about.

How do you cope with girls never being in love with you? Do you care?

Especially if it's girlfriends you put in time for, only to realize she never gave a **** about you, she was just using you to begin with. Then for her to later come back and say 'I miss you I always loved you' ect. What gives.

I realized this is what makes most red pill men. So enlighten me on the process.

Have you ever noticed how women tend to over use the word "LOVE"? Just listen to them talk. Read their faKebook meme's. Its printed all over clothes they wear. Its etched in jewelry they buy. The international symbol they use for it is a heart shape, and you see it every where. They even have a personal holiday all about "LOVE" which is centered around them....its called Valentines Day.

Now with all of this female centric, materialistic, surface propaganda, do you really think "LOVE" is very sacred to a female? Things that are so sacred are not tossed around so loosely. Things that are sacred should be held in high regard. Love is not.

To man, love has meaning rooted in honor/respect/loyalty. <----These are not traits of great importance to women. As you go down the road of life, you will begin to see that the only thing women love is an "opportunity". Opportunities come and go. Just like women.

You ask if I care....not really. I used to, before I understood what I was dealing with. I once had a an exwife demolish 13yrs of a great relationship when she said "I don't love you like I used to".


Just enjoy your time with them, and go on down the road. They are all easily replaced.

 

[Silko]

One of the most bitter parts of the bill to swallow is the realisation that women will never "love" you in the way we as men expect.

Must be true.
2 months ago my girlfriend left me. There was nothing wrong between us. Well, she just 'lost' feelings ... but she still has enough feelings to hang on me, to keep a line, to keep an option ... to make drama.

I just thought I finally faced a nice girl, I got a good vibe with and the future was an advantage. She isn't also the most pretty one I dated ... like a 7/10. She's 24. She's bi too. Doubting on this last. Afterwards I need to confess I never saw her going 100% into it. Always kept some reservation. But she still don't want to loose me. Try to understand. Not.

I'm feeling bit screwed now ... together with heavily hurt feelings.

Maybe I could know it. Never any communication on us. On break-up she complained about quite stupid things actually. WTF ... complaining issues after months. Silly.

 

[Augustus_McCrae]

OP,

Read this: https://therationalmale.com/2011/12/27/women-in-love/

-Augustus-

 

[fastlife]

@ChangePages let's be honest, you never loved her either, did you? Not the real her--you loved a projection of who you wanted her to be. You loved a projection of what you've been socially conditioned to believe love is. You loved her as a projection of chemicals released in your brain that inspired feelings you weren't able to take full ownership of since you hadn't experienced them before. Was your love anymore noble or valid than hers? LOL.

Look, it's time to take back ownership of yourself and your experience of life. Everything good in that relationship, you CREATED that. All those good feelings, you GENERATED those. Everything you loved about her were really things you love about yourself--but you don't know how to love yourself, because society is always making us look outside of ourselves for that permission. How can you expect loyalty from anyone, if you're not loyal to yourself? If you need someone else to confirm the validity of your experience of life? If you look at everything in terms of success or failure, forever or a lie?

Stop trying to define everything. Just live it. You should love your life and your experience of yourself so much that nothing anyone does/says/or doesn't say makes any impact whatsoever on what's real (to you) and what isn't. Take ownership of that sh1t, bro.

 

[marmel75]

Dude, stop acting like a woman. You don't need her, move on with your life and find other women to date.

 

[Poon King]

Female hypergamy is real.

Women only care about what you can do for them. Their "feelings" come from your ability to improve their life in some way they value. Once you can no longer do that OR they start to value something different.. those feelings disappear like a fart in the wind.

This is why men who make women their "life purpose" are doomed. There is more to life than b!tches. Act accordingly.

 

[resilient]

@ChangePages How can you expect loyalty from anyone, if you're not loyal to yourself? If you need someone else to confirm the validity of your experience of life?

Excellent way of looking at things. It's okay to compromise here or there - that's normal in a healthy relationship to accept flaw(s) or overlook a red flag or two, but when they start building red flag upon red flag of values that reject your way of life; you're living in their world not yours.

They subconsciously know this and will begin the sh!t test/games/or start disrespecting you with slights that you may miss. That's incompatibility in my mind and won't end well.

A good follow up question to ask yourself: are you leading the life that you want to lead? Are you owning up to your passions and potential in life beyond women?

I ask you these questions, ChangePages, because I'm asking them of myself right now and I know deep down the answer is a no when I want to believe it's a yes.

 

[Poon King]

Excellent way of looking at things. It's okay to compromise here or there - that's normal in a healthy relationship to accept flaw(s) or overlook a red flag or two, but when they start building red flag upon red flag of values that reject your way of life; you're living in their world not yours.

They subconsciously know this and will begin the sh!t test/games/or start disrespecting you with slights that you may miss. That's incompatibility in my mind and won't end well.

A good follow up question to ask yourself: are you leading the life that you want to lead? Are you owning up to your passions and potential in life beyond women?

I ask you these questions, ChangePages, because I'm asking them of myself right now and I know deep down the answer is a no when I want to believe it's a yes.

I find that women don't respect the vast majority of men. They use them, manipulate them, and exploit them in a passive way that is often so subtle that the man doesn't notice or is even flattered by it. Most men are easy for women to use because most men have no real purpose or goals. Women fill this gab by putting betas to work for THEM. As women see it.. if a beta doesn't have his own goals.. then he might as well work towards her goals. Most men do. Why do you think we have feminism and a pop culture that is so feminized and pro "girl power"? Nothing more than beta white knights working to achieve women's goals.

Where it becomes tragic is when the woman decides she no longer needs the faggot. He has spent months or years working towards HER goals and HER happiness because he believed "women are the key to happiness" so a happy woman will lead to happiness for him. However.. a time often comes where the woman needs a new work horse to achieve a new goal and her current beta partner doesn't fit the qualifications. This is when she leaves him.. with no guilt and no regret. Since the dumb faggot planned his entire life around her.. he finds himself lost, devastated, emotionally bankrupt, and directionless. If he was stupid enough to marry her.. then he might end up financially bankrupt as well. If there were kids.. she takes them with her.

Men want to be white knights and believe the Disney fairy tales because it feels better and it gives them a sense of purpose. But when you built and plan your life around lies.. its only a matter of time before the ground is pulled from under your feet and reality bites you in the ass. That day will not be pretty.

 

[penkitten]

In the grand scheme of things, 20 years from now, you will stumble upon this old post. It will feel as if you read it in a book once, and you'll remember it happening but these feelings will feel foreign to you. Trust me. When I was young, I had all the time in the world to contemplate who didn't love me or treat me right. And ... then life happened. And now, I could barely remember the names and the faces of everyone who failed to realize my potential and value me for who I was or who I would grow into. All the time spent over thinking or over feeling situations were not lost on me. It really molded me into someone decent.