Slickster: So very true. This was by far the greatest step in my self-realization process. When you associate with, and become involved with jerks and losers - you end up becoming the same way, and attract the same kind of people into your life. It took a long time for me to realize just what was going on, and how this was happening.
People are contagious. If you involve yourself with a jerk who involved themselves with other jerks - you are going to end up becoming a jerk, too. The problem is, nobody actually views themselves as a jerk. They're too busy being angry, bitter, hateful, distrusting, closed off, *****ing about other jerks.... This is what makes them jerks! This person right in front of you - who you are sympathizing with - is a jerk. You don't realize it until its too late, because they believe themselves to be victims. They don't realize that everything they're doing as a result of these jerks has turned them into jerks. They don't want to be hurt, so they hurt others. They don't want to be controlled or played, so they do it to others. They play games, treat people like crap, cause problems, ***** about everything, don't let anyone get to close, manipulate others, view them as objects... All while *****ing and playing the victim because the jerk hurt them. That's exactly what made them jerks. Now, they are the selfish, bitter, insultful, degrading, vulgar, mean ones. That's what jerks do to people. They turn them into jerks. It's a corruptive, vicious cycle, and no one even realizes that they're jerks - including the ones sympathizing with them.
When all you associate with are losers - you are also going to become a loser. It's unavoidable. It's all you know, and all you're familiar with. Every relationship you have will be based around these losers you involved yourself with. It's all normal behavior to you. And that's why you keep attracting losers upon losers into your life. All while being completely oblivious to the fact that you have become a loser. You're too busy *****ing about other losers - who in turn are *****ing about other losers. Everyone is a loser complaining about another loser - without realizing that they're all losers.
This is why a lot of so-called nice guys and girls who *****, complain, play the victim, feel entitled, and claim everyone is a loser ***** ***** **** ******* lover is a jerk themselves. They don't see it that way, and never will. This line of thinking, attitude, mindset, and behavior is exactly what makes them jerks. All that negativity and cynicism has turned them into jerks, and they don't even see it. They think they're the nice guy / girl victim, and everyone else is the jerk. Bzzzt. Wrong.
It's best not to involve yourself with losers, or those who associated with other losers. Chances are extremely high that they have been corrupted, and are losers themselves. They just don't see it that way - because they're too busy *****ing about everyone else. That's exactly what makes them losers. Before you know it - you're going to be *****ing about THEM, and also becoming a loser. That's when you start attracting hordes of losers into your life, and everything goes way downhill.
It's best to take a step back, and look at who you are associating with, and how they make you feel. I practically ditched my entire crowd (minus a few close friends) and moved far away, because everyone in my life was a loser, douche bag, *****, or *****. Just didn't see it at the time, or that I was becoming the same way, and attracting the same kind of people as a result of that. There was a lot of stress, anger, bitterness, drama... Pure chaos. No good to involve yourself around these kind of people.
Every little thing you associate with becomes a part of you. Hanging around with *******s, and how they communicate and treat others - that's going to be you. It's normal behavior based on your environment. You don't even realize as its happening. Or, again, getting hurt by a jerk, and becoming one yourself. All normal.
You are the company you keep, so choose wisely; make sure they're good people, and not ones who bring you down, cause problems, and make you miserable. That's who you're going to become. Who other people, which you are associating with, are associating with is also vitally important - because they're likely going to be just like them. A girl with a whole history of dating jerks and losers is a very bad candidate for involvement - ESPECIALLY if she's bitter over it. She might think she's a good girl victim getting caught up in losers, but the facts speak differently. She IS a loser, or has become one.