sh1t testing is bullsh1t

[usernamedox11]

"according to studies, the happiest couples are those that constantly show appreciation to one another, communicate well, and they don't go to bed without first resolving disagreements"


This sounds like the garbage women read in their magazines, lol. Constantly show appreciation for a girl and she will begin to appreciate your buddies coock when you turn your back. True story bro.


The strategy is to shiit on the tests and never let her know she is secure in your relationship.

I just read that. That is such a toxic mindset. I don't agree.

I treat others how I'd like to be treated. If they don't reciprocate, I'm out.

I've dated BPD girls who never let me feel secure in a relationship, and I did not appreciate it. I wouldn't want to make someone I actually care about feel like that.

 

[WanderingMan]

yeah, i don't really go to bars, but from what I read, women who frequent bars are more likely to display "sh1t testing" behavior.

anyway...i'm honestly having better results with women just being myself, saying what i feel in the moment, and what have you. I'll give some minor insecurity of mine (never anything big), a few details, and then boom, over time girl gives out her life story and all her insecurities and thinks she is bonding with me.

been hanging out with a hot girl since the first week of november and she just told me last night that she thinks she's falling in love with me.

That's good. A lot of what is written on here is a break down of dynamics, and how to communicate effectively - it's to be used when you need a guide, or need to know WHY.

Most guys, at some point in their life, have experienced a natural secure-confident frame. Everything seems to work and to fall into place. Things become easy, and they are therefore in control. BUT, that secure-confident frame doesn't always last. Time and life will invite dings and dents to that frame. Then a curveball will make them strike out. Then, the next time they're up to bat, they'll start to question themselves. And, once that starts to happen, it's a slippery slope.....and they end up on sosuave.

If thing are great.....great! Hopefully they'll stay that way. If not, and you need some answers, come back with an open mind, bud. In the meantime though, you're successful experiences should be shared.

 

[usernamedox11]

That's good. A lot of what is written on here is a break down of dynamics, and how to communicate effectively - it's to be used when you need a guide, or need to know WHY.

Most guys, at some point in their life, have experienced a natural secure-confident frame. Everything seems to work and to fall into place. Things become easy, and they are therefore in control. BUT, that secure-confident frame doesn't always last. Time and life will invite dings and dents to that frame. Then a curveball will make them strike out. Then, the next time they're up to bat, they'll start to question themselves. And, once that starts to happen, it's a slippery slope.....and they end up on sosuave.

If thing are great.....great! Hopefully they'll stay that way. If not, and you need some answers, come back with an open mind, bud. In the meantime though, you're successful experiences should be shared.

Well, i don't know. I've recently gotten into really great shape, everyone is saying I look a whole ton better. I'm looking pretty good now. Maybe that's making the difference. Only way to know is if i put some weight back on which I don't plan on doing.

 

[pyros]

The more they like you the less they s-hit test you.
If they do sh-it test you for whatever reason, even if they like you, of course you shoult react (''pass'') the test, and put them in their place.

But I repeate that the more they sh-it test you is because they think you're below their sexual value.
For example, you won't see any girl sh-it test her favourite actor, right...? because they dont want to do anything that may cause him to get mad at them. So if they sh-it test you is mainly cause they dont see you very valuable.

 

[RangerMIke]

I couldn't disagree with you more. First, let me explain who this is coming from. I'm a mid-40's former Hedge Fund Manager, currently working as a C level executive in a Private Equity turnaround effort. I'm divorced, and living in Manhattan. I'm 6'2'', 190lbs - thin, but fit and cut. I have all my hair, a mid range 6 figure income, and seven digit net worth. I described myself as an Alpha male before I even heard of the manosphere, but did some research after my divorce, and promptly took the red pill.

I've been back in the Manhattan dating pool a little more than a year, and typically date women in their high 20's to low 30's. And though I'll speak to anyone, I would never even consider dating a woman with an SMV below a 7.5. Manhattan is full of single women, and in the age group I'm looking at, except for the very few famous actresses or other extremely high SMV girls holding out for a Billionaire, they're all looking for someone like me.

I would agree that there are some PUA tactics which may be a little stale, and maybe need refreshing. I would argue that some work better on very young girls rather than in my target age group. But one thing I am absolutely convinced is static and universal for all women of all intelligence and all SMV's, is the sh1t test. In New York, where the perception is always that the perfect man or perfect women is right over the horizon, it's a constant. From the moment you approach it's a constant rain of tests. I'm hardly the master player, but I've actually gotten to the point where I enjoy them because the reactions are so predictable when you don't take the bait.

I don't know what you think a sh1t test is, but if you think it's BS, 100% of all my experience convinces me that you're missing it.

One other thing I've noticed which I don't see mentioned much, is that the frequency of sh1t tests don't seem to be correlated to how high you think their SMV is, but how high they think it is. I've seen girls who were 7's test the hell out of me, and girls who were clearly higher value than that test much less. Maybe that's what's throwing you off.

We are very similar. I'm in a smaller city and most people here know who I am, or have heard of me and I have what is considered high social value. But it really doesn't matter where you are (High LMS) or not, you will always go after women with a higher SMV than you and they will pursue men of higher SMV than them. When this happens sh1t tests happen, if I went after 7s or lower, I likely would not get that much resistance. If you are not getting tested then IMO you are settling for lower quality women than you could pull with some effort.

And you are spot on correct that women ALWAYS think they are better than they really are. I was at a holiday party last year and approached a 6.5 new girl never seen her before. I asked her name an she sh1t tested me! She said, "What, you can't read?" Pointing to her name tag. So I said, "Did you write your name?... wow aren't you smart.", this went back and forth, I was actually having fun with it, when a friend came in and excused myself. Later apparently, she spoke to someone she knew and got the dump on me... this chick has been chasing me for the last year and still is, but she's FZed. Anyway, she comes from a family with more money than brains from Boston, where she was chased because people there knew who she was and how much she was worth.

PUA stuff does work, but I agree it is VERY overused and does not REALLY work that well on older women (because they have seen it) or high quality women. I think the PUA stuff is valuable only in that they teach guys not to be too serious about themselves and break approach anxiety, and to keep trying. You do best when you approach with confidence and start a conversation and see if you can build a connection. If the connection isn't there then move on, where a lot of guys screw up is they get looked on a woman and try to force a connection... If it's not there, it's not there, this is where the PUA people screw up IMO they teach that any guy can get any girl, that is absolute BS. Reading body language is VERY helpful, get good at this and you will always know if a women is attracted to you.

 

[usernamedox11]

And you are spot on correct that women ALWAYS think they are better than they really are. I was at a holiday party last year and approached a 6.5 new girl never seen her before. I asked her name an she sh1t tested me! She said, "What, you can't read?" Pointing to her name tag.

I don't consider that a sh1t test...just a girl being rude.

A lot of this sh1t test nonsense comes from PUA guys reading books on evolutionary psychology and coming up with theories on their interactions. Keep in mind these PUA guys are a joke.

Look at this loser:

and him constantly trying to show, I forgot the term, social proof or whatever by mentioning his friends constantly. Just awkward.

Keep in mind my sisters do the same "sh1t test" behavior to me. They aren't sh1t testing me...they're just immature brats. Many american women are actually insecure, immature brats.

 

[usernamedox11]

IF you actually knew any women or had any experience you would hear them ADMIT to testing men and even testing you when you call their ass out. Get real.

lolololol...yeah they are testing your alphaness

When I came here, i agreed with many of the theories. After hanging out with say, idk, 15-20 girls in the last 2 years, I know many of the theories here are BS

I think i've outgrown this forum...it's the blind leading the blind here

p.s. people can sometimes test people in general...some people do it more than others...girls who constantly "test" you are annoying.

 

[usernamedox11]

you keep saying that and then forget to take your meds and come crawling back

lol why the flaming?

i think the thread has run its course

 

[nismo-4]

In my experience sh-it tests do exist, and do happen.
But, I only get them from chicks that dont find me attractive. When a girl really likes you the last thing she wants to do is something that's gonna annoy you or hurt you in some way. The more they like you, the less they shi-t test you.

They sh-it test you cause:
1. They think they are above you in sexual market value so they dont find you worth it.
2. They may like you but they are selfish, stupid, b-itches.

Dating and job interviews are two very similar events.

 

[stevo]

One question:
You were both on a date, you kissed and things got heated, she's moaning but no place for seks.
She invites you to her house, you go in, start kissing, but now she doesn't let you touch her. Instead she starts talking a lot, asking you so many questions.

OP, what do you call this?

 

[SgtSplacker]

I just read that. That is such a toxic mindset. I don't agree.

I treat others how I'd like to be treated. If they don't reciprocate, I'm out.

I've dated BPD girls who never let me feel secure in a relationship, and I did not appreciate it. I wouldn't want to make someone I actually care about feel like that.

You say this because you do not understand women. Women are not like men. <== read that sentence a couple times so it sets in because it's true. Sure there are some girl that are not so hypergamous so maybe you can chill just a little. But any girl that i still testing the waters by shiit testing needs to be kept on the defensive constantly. Just the other day I was at a bar chilling and some milfy 8 starts chatting me up, talking about how her husband is boring and how her and her kids have everything they need because of him. Any female that shows any hypergamy needs to be kept on the defensive.

 

[fastlife]

OP, I think for the most part you're on a good path--I'm not down with 'PUA' or 'Game' in the conscious sense of making calculations and constantly adapting yourself to the situation. If your mindset is right, then you'll be doing the right things without even thinking about it. However, you do have to make a conscious effort to monitor your mindset. I think most of the guys here can relate to being in a relationship with a girl--a girl that really likes you and everything seems great--only to realize 2 years, 5 years, 7 years down the line that somewhere in the process they got comfortable, their mindset shifted, and they're no longer the man that girl was attracted to in the first place. That is the danger; and that is where the concept of **** tests comes into play. They do happen and maybe your mind'll be so solid that you'll never have a bad run at work or run into money problems or have a friend die and think that the girl you're with will understand that and support you because she's been awesome the whole time you've known her.

The whole time you're with a woman you have to maintain your self-respect; and women, needing a sense of security, will subconsciously try to get you to sacrifice that self-respect, and will end up respecting you less and ultimately losing attraction for you over the course of time. It's not a game, it's not an us vs. them; it's a matter of understanding what it means to be a man and understanding what it is about you that a girl is attracted to in the first place.

Yeah, if you're casually dating girls and hanging out with them you probably won't experience **** tests or you won't register them because you are not emotionally invested yet. You haven't found yourself slowly isolated from your friends and social life (which happens in every relationship if you're not careful). You haven't had time to develop expectations based on mutual investment (her investment in you is totally independent of your investment in her). You aren't an exception to the fact that something like 50% of marriages end in divorce and 70% of those divorces are initiated by women--do you think those guys weren't just being themselves and doing what came naturally (i.e. what they've been socially conditioned to do)? How did that work out for them? Do you think they believed in **** tests and were able to see where the love of their life was slipping away or checking out of the relationship until it smacked them in the face?

You're free to believe what you want to believe. But that won't change the reality you'll face. Maybe you're an exception to the rule--I'm sure no other guys felt that way

 

[Korrupt]

Whoa...slow your roll, player.

The reason you fvck a woman ASAP is because of a few things:

2) it's the only near 100% way you can guarantee you'll see her again

Just wanted to say that's not true. I've made girls feel like sluts by fvcking them too soon, which in turn made them not want to hang out again.

 

[nismo-4]

One question:
You were both on a date, you kissed and things got heated, she's moaning but no place for seks.
She invites you to her house, you go in, start kissing, but now she doesn't let you touch her. Instead she starts talking a lot, asking you so many questions.

OP, what do you call this?

Her just trying to friendzone you, or she suddenly realizes you're not as attractive as her other options. She wouldn't do this with Channing Tatum, because she fears it would make him walk off and replace her in a matter of seconds.

Or just plain ASD.

 

[stevo]

Her just trying to friendzone you, or she suddenly realizes you're not as attractive as her other options. She wouldn't do this with Channing Tatum, because she fears it would make him walk off and replace her in a matter of seconds.

Or just plain ASD.

Would you call it a sheet test?

 

[thatfeel]

Actually I think pairplusroyalflush is right on this one don't you get **** tested more by girls who like you?

 

[FCB]

**** tests are often subconcious. Women have to see if you are a psycho, stalker, beta etc. If they think you are much higher value and are certain they want you and are in pursuit mode I'd think they'd **** test you less. If you are also completely out of the running some women will **** test you less and others will just be rude and passive aggressive and do it more. They may be evaluating you as someone they just want to hook up with or someone who is a potential partner and in those cases they see something in you but may be using **** tests subconsciously to figure out what category you fall into. So I think its a spectrum and is likely not black and white, but I'd say that if someone is not **** testing you at all and thinks you are much higher value then you'd be easily able to figure that out, but in many cases with women having so many options these days they are more likely to **** test in all scenarios to some degree.

 

[HeadLightsOn]

no women are people, too, they are not all the same. i don't use "game." I just act myself...i don't view it as a game. girl can like me or not like me. doesn't matter.

i don't have a problem...i've seen pics of the girls here guys fvck with...and I do much better than the guys here...girls actually like me and are actually incredibly shy around me at first.

just recently what I'd call an 8, i just dropped her because she was boring...could've smashed but lost all interest when she started talking about her makeup and nails and the latest techno concert she's going to. told her i needed to go to bed.

when she left she was telling me to make sure i text her, i didn't. she texted me after 4 days and i ignored her.

i don't care

You have your opinions and youve expressed them well here. But it seriously doesnt sound like you need, want or like the advice or info on SS. So whay hang around here? Im actaully not meaning to be pass/aggro, but I just wonder why, if youve got it all sorted in your head, (and good on you), that you can be bothered posting on SS?