sh1t testing is bullsh1t

[usernamedox11]

the more and more i hang out with women, the more i discover that a lot of the sh1t talked about here is BS...including **** testing

whenever i just act real, emote like a normal human being and just don't act needy, girls like me.

when i start playing BS games, it confuses the girls, they lose interest, act insecure, or what have you...this is usually when so-called **** testing begins to happen...because the girl is confused

oh and you don't have to fvck a girl right away if she sees you as relationship material...i've seen girls seriously date a guy and sleep with the guy multiple times only to drop the guy because he would start moving too fast, get comfortable, and become overly needy

if a girl likes you and is attracted to you, she is gonna stick around. just because you fvck a girl, it doesn't mean anything. the theories on oxytocin are BS.

the way to keep a girl around is to be interesting to talk to, be real, and to be centered. the alpha/beta mindset is BS. I've seen feminine guys do real well with women just because they were themselves and acted like normal human beings.

 

[marmel75]

Whoa...slow your roll, player.

The reason you fvck a woman ASAP is because of a few things:

1) Its an indicator of her true interest level, which you'll otherwise never truly know.

2) it's the only near 100% way you can guarantee you'll see her again

3) Woman will FAR more often drop a guy because he doesn't fvck them soon enough rather than he fvcks them too soon.

The dudes aren't getting dropped because they are fvcking her, they are getting dropped because they are acting like they are in a LTR with her and like she is their GF when she isn't. Or they are starting to let their guard down too soon and acting super beta/AFC.
But I'll guarantee you the chick stayed around longer with them acting like that than she would have if they hadn't fvcked her.

Regardless of any of this, I want to have sex with a woman because I have a high sex drive, I like fvcking, and the first few times is always the most exciting...

Some other points:

- Why would you play games? Women are the ones who play games not guys. That's on you.

- This post sounds like you getting mad because you tried to be something you aren't, it didn't work and now you are mad about it. Well no sh!t. Woman see through fakeness expertly. If you weren't congruent with your behavior/actions then obviously it isn't going to work. You need to change your mindset so that these behaviors come naturally...not change your behaviors but still have the same mindset. That won't and will never work long term.

 

[usernamedox11]

Whoa...slow your roll, player.

The reason you fvck a woman ASAP is because of a few things:

1) Its an indicator of her true interest level, which you'll otherwise never truly know.

2) it's the only near 100% way you can guarantee you'll see her again

3) Woman will FAR more often drop a guy because he doesn't fvck them soon enough rather than he fvcks them too soon.

The dudes aren't getting dropped because they are fvcking her, they are getting dropped because they are acting like they are in a LTR with her and like she is their GF when she isn't. Or they are starting to let their guard down too soon and acting super beta/AFC.
But I'll guarantee you the chick stayed around longer with them acting like that than she would have if they hadn't fvcked her.

Regardless of any of this, I want to have sex with a woman because I have a high sex drive, I like fvcking, and the first few times is always the most exciting...

Some other points:

- Why would you play games? Women are the ones who play games not guys. That's on you.

- This post sounds like you getting mad because you tried to be something you aren't, it didn't work and now you are mad about it. Well no sh!t. Woman see through fakeness expertly. If you weren't congruent with your behavior/actions then obviously it isn't going to work. You need to change your mindset so that these behaviors come naturally...not change your behaviors but still have the same mindset. That won't and will never work long term.

no im not mad...not sure why you feel the need to attack me instead of the substance of the post...lol...you clearly did not understand my post


i'm just explaining that many the theories here ARE bs and originated in the BS PUA scene...no such thing as alpha fux and beta bux...no such thing as showing you are the alpha male for fvcking right away, "sh1t testing" is a result of a guy being socially uncalibrated or doing bizarre things.

second of all, I did not say guys are getting dropped due to fvcking the girl, i literally said what you said. they became needy and the fvcking didn't matter. what matters is who you are...i've seen girls stick around to guys who terrible in bed just because he had his sh1t together

i've seen girls seriously date a guy and sleep with the guy multiple times only to drop the guy because he would start moving too fast, get comfortable, and become overly needy

^^what i said...funny how you disagreed with me by agreeing with me.

i'm just addressing the crap here...where lots of guys do advocate playing games (negging, purposely delaying response times, etc etc)

it's not about impressing the girl, it's about doing what you want to do and finding out if the girl is worth your time & effort...it's not about going from girl to girl just for validation sake. the only time i advocate this is if you are like leonardo dicaprio or clinton, with an unusually high sex drive and doing just because you NEED to get your penis wet, not for validation

 

[Tom from RFNJ]

the more and more i hang out with women, the more i discover that a lot of the sh1t talked about here is BS...including **** testing

whenever i just act real, emote like a normal human being and just don't act needy, girls like me.
***

I couldn't disagree with you more. First, let me explain who this is coming from. I'm a mid-40's former Hedge Fund Manager, currently working as a C level executive in a Private Equity turnaround effort. I'm divorced, and living in Manhattan. I'm 6'2'', 190lbs - thin, but fit and cut. I have all my hair, a mid range 6 figure income, and seven digit net worth. I described myself as an Alpha male before I even heard of the manosphere, but did some research after my divorce, and promptly took the red pill.

I've been back in the Manhattan dating pool a little more than a year, and typically date women in their high 20's to low 30's. And though I'll speak to anyone, I would never even consider dating a woman with an SMV below a 7.5. Manhattan is full of single women, and in the age group I'm looking at, except for the very few famous actresses or other extremely high SMV girls holding out for a Billionaire, they're all looking for someone like me.

I would agree that there are some PUA tactics which may be a little stale, and maybe need refreshing. I would argue that some work better on very young girls rather than in my target age group. But one thing I am absolutely convinced is static and universal for all women of all intelligence and all SMV's, is the sh1t test. In New York, where the perception is always that the perfect man or perfect women is right over the horizon, it's a constant. From the moment you approach it's a constant rain of tests. I'm hardly the master player, but I've actually gotten to the point where I enjoy them because the reactions are so predictable when you don't take the bait.

I don't know what you think a sh1t test is, but if you think it's BS, 100% of all my experience convinces me that you're missing it.

One other thing I've noticed which I don't see mentioned much, is that the frequency of sh1t tests don't seem to be correlated to how high you think their SMV is, but how high they think it is. I've seen girls who were 7's test the hell out of me, and girls who were clearly higher value than that test much less. Maybe that's what's throwing you off.

 

[usernamedox11]

Sh1t testing is not pua its common sense from relationships.

when you think every thing is a test and operate from that mindset, you will have terrible relationship.

according to studies, the happiest couples are those that constantly show appreciation to one another, communicate well, and they don't go to bed without first resolving disagreements

 

[usernamedox11]

I don't know what you think a sh1t test is, but if you think it's BS, 100% of all my experience convinces me that you're missing it. .

Well, how are you acting? Do you act extremely confident, arrogant and c0cky? That behavior will invite a lot of the so called "sh1t tests" women throw out

if you're just acting normal, i don't see the **** tests happening at all to me...it's when girls perceive a guy to be an arrogant douche do they start acting b1tchy

a girl that is acting b1tchy in general is just a low quality/insecure girl...it's not a game...it's not a sh1t test...move on to girls that are secure in themselves

 

[thatfeel]

OP, I didn't read anything you said aside from the bit about how you believe sh!t testing is when a girl is confused. This is incorrect. Sh!t testing is a woman's subconscious behavior that is "used"(again, subconsciously) to determine your strength of character and as a qualifier for sex. That's it. Once you start getting over yourself you'll start to see them miles away and you will also pass them all with flying colors. Although, a lot of it has to do with your inner "frame". Just something to think about.

 

[handle]

OP, you're right. A lot of this PUA stuff is garbage in real life. Some things suggested on this site, like a committing to self-improvement, are good advice. But the sh1t test stuff and this "us vs them" look at male/female interactions is ridiculous and not a productive way of viewing things.

For guys with a severe lack of social skills maybe it's useful to remember that sometimes you can say no to people when they ask ridiculous things of you. But the average person doesn't have to think of this as some sort of "test."

 

[NSX-R]

Your problem is not what ss is teaching but that you think each woman is the same. Responding always the same does not mean that the other female is going to have always the same reaction.
That's why you end up in such beliefs.
Adjust your game always depending of what kind of female you're interacting with.

 

[SgtSplacker]

I'm sorry but anyone who thinks shiiit tests do not exist is just not seeing them for what they really are, or just not appealing to these girls at all. When a woman even begins to consider you for a mate the tests begin immediately to see how you react. This does not apply to dudes orbiting girls, there is no testing for them because they are out of the race from the get go. But if a girl likes you and is considering the lay, she will test you for sure.


It's the only way for girls to know if they have a good leader on their hands. Men are happy with appearance, at least I am. Women need to know if you are a good leader. And this is why they shiit test. If I started socially testing women I would be single till the last day. LOL!

 

[thatfeel]

OP, you're right. A lot of this PUA stuff is garbage in real life. Some things suggested on this site, like a committing to self-improvement, are good advice. But the sh1t test stuff and this "us vs them" look at male/female interactions is ridiculous and not a productive way of viewing things.

For guys with a severe lack of social skills maybe it's useful to remember that sometimes you can say no to people when they ask ridiculous things of you. But the average person doesn't have to think of this as some sort of "test."

Because the "average person" typically has no idea what's going on in the interaction.

I don't know what kind of classification you're using for "severe lack of social skills" but a general description like that honestly falls in line more with something like autism, a condition that plagues some individuals with bottom-of-the-barrel social skills when they interact with ANYONE, not just with women.

Let's define an average person real quick: a person who hasn't completely or has even started to optimize and refine their game or their experiences with women in general, as most men really aren't and don't have a clue what's going on, also by admission someone who doesn't frequent a forum like SoSuave

The average person who doesn't have to think of this as some sort of "test" could very well just as easily be someone who just lacks social experience with a demographic of individuals, but, doesn't necessarily severely lack social skills. In this case the demographic would be females.

And fvck, I'm not even sure I subscribe to the idea that autism is a "thing" as much as it is a social construct.

Also, let's face it, sh!t testing is more than likely a creation by communities such as this, to put the spot light on a general standard of behaviors that all men will encounter in their ventures in the field of attracting and dating women. Imagine a time long past, when men had women problems, they visit forums and ask, what the hell is this broad doing, voila, the idea and branding of sh!t testing is created so that more experienced men have a clear and concise way to explain to men what's going on.

PUA individuals and groups like RSD might have incorporated and pitched the "theory" of sh!t tests into their marketing campaigns but I honestly can confidently say that sh!t testing is not a PUA construct.

I mean hell, you get sh!t tested during salary negotiations to see just how little you value your skills and experience by prospective employers who are looking to hire people for chump change.

 

[Tom from RFNJ]

Well, how are you acting? Do you act extremely confident, arrogant and c0cky? That behavior will invite a lot of the so called "sh1t tests" women throw out

I'm pretty arrogant with women compared to my peers, but I move in a pretty up-market circle so there isn't a lot of outright rudeness by anyone. I think a little more subtlety and sophistication works better as you get older anyway. You may be seeing that from 23 year old club girls, but even in this town most of them don't feel secure enough to act completely b1tchy to a well dressed mid 40's guy wearing a custom made suit and $1,000 shoes. For all they know I own the club they're dancing in.

Am I the total ****-head bad boy? Not really. It doesn't work well with the image I project. I was raised in the south so good manners are important, and I'll always stick with that if I can. But at the first sign of b1tchiness I'll shut them down in a heartbeat, and the result is always - ALWAYS - the same. And just because they aren't out right b1tchy doesn't mean there aren't continual sh1t tests. It just means the presentation of them is a little more grown up.

I'll tell you a quick story. I broke the rule once and directly called out one particularly honest and self aware girl I was seeing for a few weeks. After passing an unusually obvious test from her, I laughingly told her (not asked her) that I know all this BS she was throwing at me was really just to make sure I deserved to be with her (which is what a sh1t test looks like to the woman). She confirmed that "that's definitely part of it, but it's not like I'm always thinking that way." which was exactly what I expected to hear from her. I responded that she should really be worried about whether I think she deserves me, and her response was wrapping her arms around my neck and kissing me.

She was a 32 year old production executive for a well known fashion brand, Asian, and an 8.5 SMV, 9 undressed.

 

[SgtSplacker]

"according to studies, the happiest couples are those that constantly show appreciation to one another, communicate well, and they don't go to bed without first resolving disagreements"


This sounds like the garbage women read in their magazines, lol. Constantly show appreciation for a girl and she will begin to appreciate your buddies coock when you turn your back. True story bro.


The strategy is to shiit on the tests and never let her know she is secure in your relationship.

 

[pyros]

In my experience sh-it tests do exist, and do happen.
But, I only get them from chicks that dont find me attractive. When a girl really likes you the last thing she wants to do is something that's gonna annoy you or hurt you in some way. The more they like you, the less they shi-t test you.

They sh-it test you cause:
1. They think they are above you in sexual market value so they dont find you worth it.
2. They may like you but they are selfish, stupid, b-itches.

 

[usernamedox11]

In my experience sh-it tests do exist, and do happen.
But, I only get them from chicks that dont find me attractive. When a girl really likes you the last thing she wants to do is something that's gonna annoy you or hurt you in some way. The more they like you, the less they shi-t test you.

They sh-it test you cause:
1. They think they are above you in sexual market value so they dont find you worth it.
2. They may like you but they are selfish, stupid, b-itches.

they aren't sh1t testing,

they

A) don't like you all that much and are not worth your time

B) just immature and b1tchy in general

if you guys saw my sister talking to guys, you'd think she's "sh1t testing" them 24/7 but she's just like that in general, even with her girlfriends, and would never ever date the guys she "sh1t tests." She especially hates c0cky guys and likes to fvck with them...she isn't testing them...she would never date them...just wants to get under their skin

the only time my sister doesn't bust a guy's nuts is when she sees he's really innocent and genuine and then she purposely acts very nice to him...and these are the only guys she would consider dating

i'm sorry but i've grown up with multiple female cousins and sisters, and when you hear them speak among themselves, they are just as confused sometimes as guys and the sh1t here is a joke.

i remember i asked one cousin "don't you think it's pathetic how your BF is always buying you expensive stuff just to try and keep you attracted?"

Know what she said? "Nah that's not it. he just thinks he's a baller"

She's madly in love with him, cooks & cleans for him...makes him breakfast at 5 am and wants to marry him.

 

[WanderingMan]

In my experience sh-it tests do exist, and do happen.
But, I only get them from chicks that dont find me attractive. When a girl really likes you the last thing she wants to do is something that's gonna annoy you or hurt you in some way. The more they like you, the less they shi-t test you.

They sh-it test you cause:
1. They think they are above you in sexual market value so they dont find you worth it.
2. They may like you but they are selfish, stupid, b-itches.

Ive had women bend over backwards - offering me the world - just to come to their place to hang out, then, when I get there, an immediate sh1t test to see if Im still the person who they think I am.

The problem most guys have, which has been mentioned here, is they dont recognize sh1t tests for what they are. A lot of sh1t tests can, and will, be confused as disinterest or bad/needy/selfish/b1tchy behavior. When, in fact, it's a test of your boundaries and a test of your manhood.

Women WANT a man to pass their **** tests. When the time comes, they WANT you to put them in their place. If you dont stand up for yourself, as human nature dictates, they WILL walk all over you and therefore lose attraction for you.

 

[usernamedox11]

Women WANT a man to pass their **** tests. When the time comes, they WANT you to put them in their place. If you dont stand up for yourself, as human nature dictates, they WILL walk all over you and lose attraction for you.

do you meet your women @ the club or bars? just curious

and you should respect yourself in general...not just with women...it's not a sh1t test. it's just the way you should live your life.

 

[usernamedox11]

Your problem is not what ss is teaching but that you think each woman is the same. Responding always the same does not mean that the other female is going to have always the same reaction.
That's why you end up in such beliefs.
Adjust your game always depending of what kind of female you're interacting with.

no women are people, too, they are not all the same. i don't use "game." I just act myself...i don't view it as a game. girl can like me or not like me. doesn't matter.

i don't have a problem...i've seen pics of the girls here guys fvck with...and I do much better than the guys here...girls actually like me and are actually incredibly shy around me at first.

just recently what I'd call an 8, i just dropped her because she was boring...could've smashed but lost all interest when she started talking about her makeup and nails and the latest techno concert she's going to. told her i needed to go to bed.

when she left she was telling me to make sure i text her, i didn't. she texted me after 4 days and i ignored her.

i don't care

 

[WanderingMan]

do you meet your women @ the club or bars? just curious

I meet them everywhere. But, in the past, mostly through bars-clubs and online.

 

[usernamedox11]

I meet them everywhere. But, in the past, mostly through bars-clubs and online.

yeah, i don't really go to bars, but from what I read, women who frequent bars are more likely to display "sh1t testing" behavior.

anyway...i'm honestly having better results with women just being myself, saying what i feel in the moment, and what have you. I'll give some minor insecurity of mine (never anything big), a few details, and then boom, over time girl gives out her life story and all her insecurities and thinks she is bonding with me.

been hanging out with a hot girl since the first week of november and she just told me last night that she thinks she's falling in love with me.