Seemingly every avenue to meet single women is completely dominated in numbers by men. What am I supposed to do?

[Bigpapa]

Here is the issue with this. There are literally tons of other men that are doing the same exact thing, whether that be bettering their career prospects, attaining more wealth, getting in better shape, dressing better, etc. Realistically, there is only so much you can improve with these various traits. Something else to consider is that it takes a lot to impress women, this is mostly a result of social media. I'm 6'4" and one of the fittest guys at my gym, in the real world this is very impressive but when women see something like this on instagram on a regular basis it's not impressive to them. Driving a BMW or Mercedes is not impressive to women, you'd have to start driving a ferrari or lambo to have this effect. The point is that it takes a lot to really stand out in today's world, almost to the degree where it is unrealistic. Men that are in the top 10% will be viewed as "average" by most women, that's how difficult it is right now.

I totally believe that men should work on self improvement and all that but to do that with the expectation that it will lead to better results with women is false. The exceptions to something like this would be men that are well below average or have some serious deficiencies that they need to work on. This could be things like being significantly overweight, having poor hygeine, abysmal social skills, etc.

maybe You should work also on the personality and peoples skills

I am an amazing conversationalist And have a high social intelligence

women find me funny and witty . Men from a quality point of view are the lowest now . Most of them sound and act like autists

 

[Bigpapa]

It works so well. Simply being able to converse with women, make them laugh, turn them on, take them on a journey, give them a fantasy......this all comes from social intelligence, communication abilities and having an interesting and varied life. I think men have to become experienced in life before they become interesting and are able to hold this sort of power to entertain women in this effortless way.

 

[sangheilios]

maybe You should work also on the personality and peoples skills

I am an amazing conversationalist And have a high social intelligence

women find me funny and witty . Men from a quality point of view are the lowest now . Most of them sound and act like autists

I wasn't using myself as an example.

 

[andreihaha]

Here is the issue with this. There are literally tons of other men that are doing the same exact thing, whether that be bettering their career prospects, attaining more wealth, getting in better shape, dressing better, etc. Realistically, there is only so much you can improve with these various traits. Something else to consider is that it takes a lot to impress women, this is mostly a result of social media. I'm 6'4" and one of the fittest guys at my gym, in the real world this is very impressive but when women see something like this on instagram on a regular basis it's not impressive to them. Driving a BMW or Mercedes is not impressive to women, you'd have to start driving a ferrari or lambo to have this effect. The point is that it takes a lot to really stand out in today's world, almost to the degree where it is unrealistic. Men that are in the top 10% will be viewed as "average" by most women, that's how difficult it is right now.

I totally believe that men should work on self improvement and all that but to do that with the expectation that it will lead to better results with women is false. The exceptions to something like this would be men that are well below average or have some serious deficiencies that they need to work on. This could be things like being significantly overweight, having poor hygeine, abysmal social skills, etc.

By standing out, I meant having a different attitude.
Money, fitness, cars, clothes are something many guys have. Won't make you stand out.
But the way you make a woman feel, well that makes a big fvcking difference.

 

[RBK]

Utilize your strengths, its all any of us can do. You need to have hobbies that put you in contact with women, or just do what I do learn to talk to EVERYONE. Literally say hi, smile and be nice to everyone around you. You would be surprised what learning to talk to everyone does for putting good energy out there.

I know it's easy to get discouraged, OLD is low hanging fruit. Have good photos, cheeky one liner in a bio and swipe when you're bored.

I've also had a lot of money and been poor, when I had a lot of money girls didn't seem to care but I tend to avoid gold digger type women.

 

[bat soup]

Go on a dating app - 90% male

Any Meetup or local group that I’ve tried - over 90% male

Go to a bar - overflowing with guys

Even tried treating myself at a coffee shop - every table in the building was occupied by one male

You see where I’m going with this. I can’t seem to go anywhere to interact with single women that isn’t absolutely swarming with desperate, lonely, and overly aggressive dudes. And I now live in a city that is supposed to have way more women than men. It just doesn’t make sense, and to be honest, it’s really starting to get under my skin. I want to get back into dating, but there’s no realistic way to do this with these kinds of crazy gender ratios. I wholeheartedly believe in what I have to offer, but I need a chance to be able to show that.

Have other people had this experience?

Does anyone have any advice for how to deal with this?

I'd order an invasion of a neighbouring country. That should reduce the male population by about 40,000 within a few months.

 

[The_Hand_Of_God]

For me, the best way to meet new women isn't to go to social meeting spots like night clubs, bars or OLD. It's actually just meeting them during my day-to-day errands like going to the bank, grocery store, cafe, gym, restaurant, etc....

The trick is to become a regular at those places so that people get familiar with seeing you.

The problem, as you mentioned in the OP, is that any place that's meant to be a social meeting spot between men and women will almost certainly be overflowing with men.

But as usual, the deciding factor is how you look and how you present yourself. If you look fit, clean, handsome and appear to have a friendly demeanor then it's much easier to talk to random women.

No way around it, man, you HAVE to look good.

Agreed it is how you look and dress. If you feel **** in yourself, you project it. There are alot of people who say looks won't matter but for initial attraction and meeting women they are key. If you are in shape your face is thinner, your posture just seems to be straight and tough. Being in shape and dressing smart will sort you out from 90% of men.

 

[SW15]

Something else to consider is that it takes a lot to impress women, this is mostly a result of social media.

I'm 6'4" and one of the fittest guys at my gym, in the real world this is very impressive but when women see something like this on instagram on a regular basis it's not impressive to them.

Driving a BMW or Mercedes is not impressive to women, you'd have to start driving a ferrari or lambo to have this effect. The point is that it takes a lot to really stand out in today's world, almost to the degree where it is unrealistic. Men that are in the top 10% will be viewed as "average" by most women, that's how difficult it is right now.

A 6'4" man with big muscles is a stand out guy and deserve access to the top tier women. Average women now think that they are entitled to a 6'0"+ man with big muscles. I've been flaked on by women prior to first dates below my level in looks. Those women are doing me a favor but it is a bit unsettling to see women worse looking than me thinking they are superior to me. They are delusional princesses.

A BMW or a Mercedes-Benz is a status symbol vehicle intended to get a man some vagina. I would agree that the effect of these cars has diminish recently. These are two brands that are still better for you in getting vag than owning a Honda or Toyota. Also, the BMWs and Mercedes-Benz's today are not as well made as the roughly 1980-2005 models from these brands. Some of those 1980s and 1990s BMWs and Mercedes' were amazing cars. There's been a quality decline there. The brands still have prestige.

It takes more money, better status symbol, and more fitness to stand out now.

There are literally tons of other men that are doing the same exact thing, whether that be bettering their career prospects, attaining more wealth, getting in better shape, dressing better, etc. Realistically, there is only so much you can improve with these various traits.

I totally believe that men should work on self improvement and all that but to do that with the expectation that it will lead to better results with women is false. The exceptions to something like this would be men that are well below average or have some serious deficiencies that they need to work on. This could be things like being significantly overweight, having poor hygeine, abysmal social skills, etc.

Accurate.

 

[thelambofdeth]

I went on dating apps. I was overweight at the time and not particularly photogenic.

I had a new date minimum twice a month.

I found the better sites where you have to pay was much better than tinder and the free ones, which were all about looks.

I did, however, spend most evenings messaging. I had maybe a one in 10-15 response rate.

I’d say the responders, one in 3 got to a date. Out of the dates, maybe 1 in 2 got to sechs.

I would add that the moment I gave up PUA game techniques, and presented myself as who I was, the better it got.

You have to accentuate your real strengths.

At first I tried sporty pics and a picture of my nice car/flat. The moment I changed to the real me - a good suit. Blazer and jeans, it changed .

If you can’t pull off bad boy alpha (I can’t), pull off “guy who she would be proud to bring to a party”

OLD gets a bad rap, but as has been established, a lot of guys are here because they don’t know how to talk to women. Especially with written communications, I find this easy.

This had to have been years and years ago or this is cap. Either despite being fat you were really good-looking, or you only matched with ugly women. Women on dating apps nowadays are shallow af. At minimum you have to be photogenic, in shape, appear to be having fun/have a huge social circle, and at least be moderately good-looking these days just to get an average woman to match.

 

[Bigpapa]

That’s totally illogical.

Guys are definitely approaching. All the time. That’s where the simping comes in.

Guys aren’t “effectively” approaching and it purely comes down to lack-of-education and understanding about what women are, and what women are are attracted to.

Men in the West are gender confused. But that doesn’t mean they aren’t approaching. They are. But it’s a giant failure. Also, in every Western city now you have an army of 1 million+ Indian Pajeet spam approachers who are constantly approaching like seagulls.

Anyway, point being - Woman are getting approached. And it’s not about “balls”. Obviously you need balls. Isnt that obvious? Alongside your balls, you also need a brain that is redpilled and clear about gender polarity. Otherwise you’re just an Indian spam approacher with no art of seduction.

and a high dose of intelligence of whom to approach based on your smv

 

[Bigpapa]

Ask him what race these women were. I think you’ll discover that they aren’t western.

And @Fruitbat I don’t mean to constantly rib you about this, my man, but you can’t be telling other men that you were fat and still pulled women on apps. It’s very misleading dude.

This is the problem with many Men. They are providing distorted data - no incentive to tell the truth.

even though this are tinder stats , you kinda apply them also into reality as most guys are using mainly tinder as way to source for women

guys complaining about women are average and bellow average in looks

the funny thing is that the average woman is not really that better than the average guy

so most of the guys who poison the minds are average and bellow average people ( both sexes )

You will never really see a bitter guy or women with any above average smv ( western world standards )

and yeah bottom 10-20% is f8cked , but with a lot of dedication they can still have a decent sexual life

 

[SW15]

The advice I’m seeing “hurrrr. Just approach. Shoot your shot bro hurrrr” is so dumb. Approaching is a terrible idea if the guy doesn’t have game. He’s just going to upset her/creep her out. Observe Indian spam approachers. They are utter pests.

A lot of approaches aren't worth doing. You don't want to do the approach if it has a high probability of being a failure. Too many rejections and most men are going to have to deal with big time psychological trauma. Agree about the Indian spam approachers. I have no idea how they do it.

 

[SW15]

You seem to equate “approaching” with “Game” and being effective with women.

Couldn’t be further from the truth. Observe the legendary Indian spam approacher. It’s a thing of pure Satanism. An Indian can approach a billion people, not get laid, and keep going without a flicker of morale-drop.

To be good with women, you have to deeply understand their minds and how they think/behave. Many guys appear to be too proud to do this, or lazy. I dunno.

If I took that many L's approaching, I would be extremely traumatized. I don't know how those Indian spam approachers do it. I've seen those guys in action before, mainly at Meetup events. They are utter pests as you say.

 

[Bigpapa]

Have you been to India?

It would then make sense to you.

I have been to India. These people literally live in their own excrement. It’s unbelievable. It is one of the most miserable places I’ve ever been.

So, for an Indian to come to the West, It’s pure lottery win. It’s impossible for them to feel sad ever again because their previous life was soooo incredibly horrible. No joke dude. India is a disgusting and scary place.

do not give ideas to where these sex tourists should go next

 

[SW15]

I have no idea how Chinese guys are not spam approachers. There is a huge surplus of Chinese males.

 

[bmp2cpm]

Focus on a circle of friends and women will find you.

Also, women can sense if you are looking.

Women can sense when you are NOT looking.

The moment my future wife moved in with me a fairly attractive distant coworker at an offsite meeting ended up high five-ing me, tried to get me to have late night drinks with her at the hotel, and then after the meeting emailed me asking me to go out with her for coffee.

When women sense genuine disinterest from a guy they lock onto that guy like a radar-guided AIM-7 Sparrow missile.

Guys need to show true, natural disinterest more often. Women love it!

 

[thelambofdeth]

I think that for some reason, certain guys are held to a lower standard than most guys are because they appeal to a niche. He is tall and his overweightness might have helped actually with some women.

I agree, its annoying because I feel like I am always held to the maximum standard they can squeeze out of me.

And that's why it's very frustrating. I'm almost 6'4, in shape, dress well, and I have humble af standands...and I still and get chit on dating apps. Though I'm sure race plays a HUGE factor as well.

 

[thelambofdeth]

Focus on a circle of friends and women will find you.

Also, women can sense if you are looking.

Women can sense when you are NOT

When women sense genuine disinterest from a guy they lock onto that guy like a radar-guided AIM-7 Sparrow missile.

Guys need to show true, natural disinterest more often. Women love it!

This is pure anecdotal bs tbh. Every time I go out I don't look interested...even to bars with friends...naturally bc I have rbf and I'm really laid back and aloof. And women literally never notice. Women can sense if they think you're attractive. That's it. They don't have some magical sense....if they did they wouldn't even up with abusers, *******s, wife beaters, etc. They just have eyes and want what they find attractive, whether you look interested or not.

 

[BeExcellent]

Advice from the old lady:

You have to STAND OUT in the right way. Otherwise, well, you’re invisible. There are lots of thoughts about just how you stand out, but if you don’t you’ll never register on her radar.

My guy has very long straight hair. Wears a leather top hat sometimes. Very rock star look. He’s also tall. So he stood out like crazy from all the other men in the venue.

You gotta find something unique to you if you are going to stand out from other men on looks or dress. Another great way to stand out is no give a shjt wit. In other words banter. More than one average looking Joe has gotten into a hot girls pants with great banter.

But you gotta stand out or be invisible. That’s the deal.

 

[SW15]

I agree, its annoying because I feel like I am always held to the maximum standard they can squeeze out of me.

I identify. There have been times I've felt that way.