Seemingly every avenue to meet single women is completely dominated in numbers by men. What am I supposed to do?

[thelambofdeth]

Focus on a circle of friends and women will find you.

Also, women can sense if you are looking.

Women can sense when you are NOT

When women sense genuine disinterest from a guy they lock onto that guy like a radar-guided AIM-7 Sparrow missile.

Guys need to show true, natural disinterest more often. Women love it!

This is pure anecdotal bs tbh. Every time I go out I don't look interested...even to bars with friends...naturally bc I have rbf and I'm really laid back and aloof. And women literally never notice. Women can sense if they think you're attractive. That's it. They don't have some magical sense....if they did they wouldn't even up with abusers, *******s, wife beaters, etc. They just have eyes and want what they find attractive, whether you look interested or not.

 

[BeExcellent]

Advice from the old lady:

You have to STAND OUT in the right way. Otherwise, well, you’re invisible. There are lots of thoughts about just how you stand out, but if you don’t you’ll never register on her radar.

My guy has very long straight hair. Wears a leather top hat sometimes. Very rock star look. He’s also tall. So he stood out like crazy from all the other men in the venue.

You gotta find something unique to you if you are going to stand out from other men on looks or dress. Another great way to stand out is no give a shjt wit. In other words banter. More than one average looking Joe has gotten into a hot girls pants with great banter.

But you gotta stand out or be invisible. That’s the deal.

 

[SW15]

I agree, its annoying because I feel like I am always held to the maximum standard they can squeeze out of me.

I identify. There have been times I've felt that way.

 

[SW15]

And both being 7s, it makes sense why we are. Basically, we are not worth the trouble in the post-monogamy environment, and the ratings dont scale.

I'm probably in the 6-7 range overall. Definitely above average in looks but not top tier. I'm not a 6'4" guy with big muscles. I'm not an acne ridden neckbeard omega. I'm a guy with normal weight and not with gigantic muscles. 5'10" too, which is meh.

 

[thelambofdeth]

I'm probably in the 6-7 range overall. Definitely above average in looks but not top tier. I'm not a 6'4" guy with big muscles. I'm not an acne ridden neckbeard omega. I'm a guy with normal weight and not with gigantic muscles. 5'10" too, which is meh.

That's the thing...it feels like if you're not at least an 8 you might as well be a 4 or whatever. I'm 6'3 with a lean, trim frame and I accenuate it with the clothes I wear as I take fashion and grooming very seriously. From the neck down I look great in anything I wear, but my face is nothing to write home about, I'm not buff AT ALL and my personality doesn't match my clothes bc I'm an introvert.

Idk why people don't really want to admit how important have a good-looking face means in terms of securing women. Face pretty much trumps anything. Especially with how shallow many women are now and even moreso on dating apps. There was a time if you were a 7 you'd have a nice supply of options as a man...now? Lol

 

[SW15]

That's the thing...it feels like if you're not at least an 8 you might as well be a 4 or whatever. I'm 6'3 with a lean, trim frame and I accenuate it with the clothes I wear as I take fashion and grooming very seriously. From the neck down I look great in anything I wear, but my face is nothing to write home about, I'm not buff AT ALL and my personality doesn't match my clothes bc I'm an introvert.

Idk why people don't really want to admit how important have a good-looking face means in terms of securing women. Face pretty much trumps anything. Especially with how shallow many women are now and even moreso on dating apps. There was a time if you were a 7 you'd have a nice supply of options as a man...now? Lol

Wow! You're 6'3". That's a huge advantage.

I've had good facial aesthetics but I'm only 5'10". I have a good peacocking look. I also carry myself different than a lot of men. I've overheard men trying to talk to women and it's fuccking cringe a lot of times. I ask women about their more meaningful passions and deeper topics than surface level shiit when I am trying to pick them up.

I'm putting out a suave vibe when I'm on and in full blown seducer mode.

 

[thelambofdeth]

Wow! You're 6'3". That's a huge advantage.

I've had good facial aesthetics but I'm only 5'10". I have a good peacocking look. I also carry myself different than a lot of men. I've overheard men trying to talk to women and it's fuccking cringe a lot of times. I ask women about their more meaningful passions and deeper topics than surface level shiit when I am trying to pick them up.

I'm putting out a suave vibe when I'm on and in full blown seducer mode.

If you have good facial aesthetics it doesn't matter if you're 5'8...that's physically more important than anything. I would easily trade inches of my height for a better face. I say that as someone who's tall and in shape and dresses like a rock star and it's still moot...let a lone for a dude that's tall and fat and/or ugly.

Height doesn't really mean chit as most women are short and most men will be taller than them anyway. And some women dont even like tall men, yet every woman wants a good-looking man. Maybe if you're tall and buff or tall and good-looking, but on its own it's totally irrelevant to women. It's just a nice buffer.

All I can really do is neg and be aloof. Suave isn't in my vocabulary lools. I'm sure that's quite the boon.

 

[Jesse Pinkman]

This is where @Jesse Pinkman advice comes in.

there’s lots of other guys but only some have the balls to approach

People seem to think I am pessimistic when I say this and maybe this is worthy of its own thread but very few guys are actually a fit in doing well with game. It is tough as hell to be that guy who somewhat regularly gets laid with decent looking women. You have to be in shape, financially well off enough (a job that can grant you a decent pad with good logistics in a big city and some disposable income), and then on top of all of that, somehow dedicate time during your week to approach.

It is exhausting and takes a ton out of you, this is why maybe 2 to 3% of men out there, at max, can make it happen.

 

[Fruitbat]

Ask him what race these women were. I think you’ll discover that they aren’t western.

And @Fruitbat I don’t mean to constantly rib you about this, my man, but you can’t be telling other men that you were fat and still pulled women on apps. It’s very misleading dude.

This is the problem with many Men. They are providing distorted data - no incentive to tell the truth.

Update: he did mention it actually. Good man, Fruitbat.

Before my wife, I dated plenty of white women.

One was 33 and an artist. Another was 35 and managed a supermarket. Another was early thirties and was a national manager for a clothing company.

I was about 30 lb overweight. Not fat, but I had somewhat of a gut.

I never had a problem on OLD, but none of these women were conventionally hot.

I think things are different in the states.

I have no incentive to lie. What would be the point, you know full well I don’t give a shyt, I’ve posted many of my shortcomings on here. Im not trying to be a guru.


The fact you think I’m lying is curious. You’ve either not been able to get anywhere yourself, and your ego can’t accept it can be done without a six pack, or US dating is so hard it’s just a different game. I know it to be a fact, because I’ve done it.


All I had going for me is being tall and big framed, good job, bang average looks.

I really didn’t find OLD that hard. I got zero interest from “hot chicks”, other than my wife; and I fully accept dating asian women is a lot easier. I don’t care, I think they’re better in all respects. Social stigma be damned, I’m happily married while all those dudes who wouldn’t deal with the stigma are raging.

I think it either a US thing, or guys are either only approaching women out of their league, or they don’t have the thick skin and social skills to grind the apps to find someone.

 

[RBK]

Height doesn't really mean chit as most women are short and most men will be taller than them anyway. And some women dont even like tall men, yet every woman wants a good-looking man. Maybe if you're tall and buff or tall and good-looking, but on its own it's totally irrelevant to women. It's just a nice buffer.

All I can really do is neg and be aloof. Suave isn't in my vocabulary lools. I'm sure that's quite the boon.

Wrong. Every woman I know wants 6'0 tall dude or taller. It's literally a requirement. Being tall is a cheat code.

 

[thelambofdeth]

Wrong. Every woman I know wants 6'0 tall dude or taller. It's literally a requirement. Being tall is a cheat code.

Umm...no. im tall, so I would know. How many of those women are actually with a tall guy? It's only a requirement for superficial IG models. Also they don't speak for women collectively. Being tall is like being a woman with a big rack. Everyone says they want it, but in most cases it's just a platitude. It's a cheat code if you're good-looking and tall. Or shredded and tall. Or rich and tall. Not just tall. It's just a buffer. Nothing more. Having a great face or being rich is a cheat code. The only people who think it's some huge advantage are people who aren't tall.

 

[andreihaha]

Everyone thinks that what they don't have is a cheat code.
It's just an excuse to not take action, to blame it on something external.
When actually we all know that you can be short, ugly, poor, dumb, overweight or whatever and still have success with the opposite sex. We see it in our everyday life.

If you have a great face, good income, you're smart and fit, you'll blame your lack of success on your height. Same goes for anything else.
When you should actually realize how fvcking grateful you should be for having almost everything.
And if you feel like you're lacking everything you need to attract someone, you should still be fvcking grateful. Because you could have even less.

So go out there, be better, give yourself some credit. Someone will eventually realize how valuable you are, and that's the kind of people that you should be looking for, not the low-hanging fruit.

If you're not successful, be it in dating, your career or anything else, it's because you're a lazy bastard. You can either work for success or spend the remainder of your life in your current situation. It's all up to you.

 

[EyeOnThePrize]

Because behavior like this from men results in women becoming pickier and more standoffish. They'll start believing that there aren't any good men that are out there to date, it also doesn't help when all of their female friends are going through the same exact thing, further bolstering these thoughts and feelings. Why do you think OLD sites and apps don't work the vast majority of time? It's because these women are being absolutely bombarded with messages and free validation, regardless of what she even brings to the table, and the result is them becoming impossibly picky.

With male dominated mating environments, such as bars or clubs, you have to stand out significantly to have any chance. There isn't some magic game or strategy, unless you are physically setting yourself apart from the other men you are going to have a hard time in this environment.

The dating game sucks today for the vast majority of men. It has nothing to do with "game" or other such nonsense, it's mostly about being in the right place, at the right time and with the right people.....aka luck. It could be you out shopping and by chance you cross paths with an employee there who asks if you need help and you start a conversation, she's also into you to some degree AND is available/single. That's how most real relationships are formed, it's often through social circles or just random events that occur where the stars basically align.

Of course it's part luck, but to say being more fit, better dressed, more charming, don't increase your chances is an obvious mistake. Those things make or break interactions. I know what you mean about women being jaded and acting like royalty, but you simply skip over these women as lost, not waste time biitching about it on public forums like a cuck.

The women worth spending time with will value yours. And I've had perfectly fine success on dating apps, so speak for yourself.

There is an element of randomness, and hard work puts you where the good luck finds you, which is true for all things in life. Focus on what you can control.

 

[Pierce Manhammer]

My guy has very long straight hair. Wears a leather top hat sometimes. Very rock star look. He’s also tall. So he stood out like crazy from all the other men in the venue.

you betcha

 

[Pierce Manhammer]

It is interesting that many here feel a preference for Asian women is a DLV.

In Northern California, where I live a great deal of the population is Asian or mixed Asian. A large majority of men are very attracted to Asian women here. I am not traditionally one who is, but there have been a few Asian girls in my entourage over the years - they’ve tended to be of a certain type:Japanese or at least with genetics that seem to lean towards Japanese female traits.

.
I’m not saying you’re lying. It’s just an unusual path you’ve taken. Most guys turn to Asian women out of scarcity.

 

[AttackFormation]

That's the thing...it feels like if you're not at least an 8 you might as well be a 4 or whatever. I'm 6'3 with a lean, trim frame and I accenuate it with the clothes I wear as I take fashion and grooming very seriously. From the neck down I look great in anything I wear, but my face is nothing to write home about, I'm not buff AT ALL and my personality doesn't match my clothes bc I'm an introvert.

Idk why people don't really want to admit how important have a good-looking face means in terms of securing women. Face pretty much trumps anything. Especially with how shallow many women are now and even moreso on dating apps. There was a time if you were a 7 you'd have a nice supply of options as a man...now? Lol

Im willing to bet you have no social networks to meet women through. And when i say social networks, im not talking about the stuff that guys parrot on the internet for you to "do". Im talking about the way people actually meet - acquaintances who simply invite their male and female acquaintances to social gatherings, you being one of those invited.

Am i right?

 

[Zimbabwe]

I think I’m understanding the mindset of guys like OP.

It’s purely this - “I’m annoyed that My simping is ineffective because all other guys are simping too. So I’m going to tie my mind in a pretzel knot and blame other guys and their simping for the reason that my own simping isn’t effective. If I was the only guy who was simping, and these other guys would just get out of my way, then women would finally like me.”

Maybe stop banging Asian exchange students from coffee meets bagel OP? If you want to “feel” good about yourself, then you have to start behaving in a way that, when you look in the mirror, you feel proud of the reflection.

As we know there's a power imbalance in the dating world between men and women. One of the causes is male thirst and how it manifests, in the form of simping, both online and in the real world. Simping behaviour is extremely detrimental to men because it causes women to have overinflated self-esteem. This is partially why women try to shoot out of their league, online and in the real world.

SOLUTION

I propose that men actively and vigorously shame and shun all forms of simping that they come across, especially on social media. If you see a guy complimenting a random Instagram model/influencer, call him out. If you see your friends following random Instagram models, call them out. Make fun of them. If you know a guy who pays for OnlyFans, call him out and make fun of him. Normalize shaming simps. Personally, I don't ever compliment a random woman unless I'm actively trying to date her. The only exception is if a woman compliments me first, I'll return a compliment to be polite. Men complain about going years without receiving compliments. Well, stop complimenting women, then. Women don't compliment random guys so why should we compliment them? Let's normalize having standards, not being desperate and not simping.

Shame is extremely powerful. Why do you think women hate "slvt shaming" so much? It's worked for centuries to control their behaviour. Simp shaming will work and is already working imo. Gen Z guys call out simps all the time. We have to police other men's behaviour to gain power as a collective. Make women feel unimportant. I'm a pretty good looking guy and this is how I act. Treat her like any other guy unless you're trying to have sex with her.

 

[thelambofdeth]

As we know there's a power imbalance in the dating world between men and women. One of the causes is male thirst and how it manifests, in the form of simping, both online and in the real world. Simping behaviour is extremely detrimental to men because it causes women to have overinflated self-esteem. This is partially why women try to shoot out of their league, online and in the real world.

SOLUTION

I propose that men actively and vigorously shame and shun all forms of simping that they come across, especially on social media. If you see a guy complimenting a random Instagram model/influencer, call him out. If you see your friends following random Instagram models, call them out. Make fun of them. If you know a guy who pays for OnlyFans, call him out and make fun of him. Normalize shaming simps. Personally, I don't ever compliment a random woman unless I'm actively trying to date her. The only exception is if a woman compliments me first, I'll return a compliment to be polite. Men complain about going years without receiving compliments. Well, stop complimenting women, then. Women don't compliment random guys so why should we compliment them? Let's normalize having standards, not being desperate and not simping.

Shame is extremely powerful. Why do you think women hate "slvt shaming" so much? It's worked for centuries to control their behaviour. Simp shaming will work and is already working imo. Gen Z guys call out simps all the time. We have to police other men's behaviour to gain power as a collective. Make women feel unimportant. I'm a pretty good looking guy and this is how I act. Treat her like any other guy unless you're trying to have sex with her.

Most simps are mentally ill. They're exploited and brainwashed and they don't really have shame...they're simps lol. They can't be reasoned with. Too much first world feminism and isolation has caused this. It's going to take wayyyyy more than insults. They're indoctrinated. It's like shaming a religious person or a different political party. It's pissing in the wind....tbh they need to be culled.

 

[Hamurabimbi]

Convenience store clerks. Health care situations. Festivals. Baristas. Sales clerks. Bartenders... yeah. Many get approached constantly. But. Women thirst for men. Hard. I’ve found women love flirting and attention from men. The ‘anti-harrassment’ stuff is just propaganda. Just be socially calibrated. Meet her looks threshold. And have some game.

 

[thelambofdeth]

Convenience store clerks. Health care situations. Festivals. Baristas. Sales clerks. Bartenders... yeah. Many get approached constantly. But. Women thirst for men. Hard. I’ve found women love flirting and attention from men. The ‘anti-harrassment’ stuff is just propaganda. Just be socially calibrated. Meet her looks threshold. And have some game.

Women do love attention....from men they find attractive. If not, they abhor it. Just like guys...but much more so bc they get it so often. If you're hitting of a chick at work you'd better be pretty high tier. If you look like Harry Styles or something you're all set. If not? Lol.