Joe and drm’
Thanks for the posts in this thread. I too am separated from a women who is described very much in detail in these threads, I could almost imagine her to be the same person!
Joe my partner was a teacher too, strange uhh’’, but I am in the UK. Still this reads so familiar so familiar indeed it is scary.
Please listen to what I have to say as for many others in here.
If you continue to waste time with this women trust me things will turn out bad for you!
They are called emotional vampires for a reason, they suck out your self respect/esteem and grow from it and as soon as your drained they move on leaving you a shell of your former self, not stronger but with issues of your own. Now don’t read to much into this atm, please read about a little extract of my experience and tag in all of yours also.
These women make you feel like a god a king, so much so I ended up marrying mine, even though there was many, many red flag’s. But they have way that just blows your world open and you cant help to fall for the spell.
But each month that passes slowly it gets harder, it gets worse, those issues start to show more and more until eventually, you find yourself almost to the lvl of the women you met. Depressed and your mind cant think of anything but the issues that your partner as created to mess with you due to problems of, 'What I call' needing attention.
My partner used to go on dates with men who wanted to screw her, I let her as I did not want to show jelousy I thought the phase would pass.
She told me there where just mates, I objected ofc but it means nothing (they will simply throw it back at you and make you out to be the one with issues, until you simply put up with it to prove a point a cirlce you cant win), they still do it and when they do it once they do it over and over again until they have about 5-6 SAP’s on there arm giving them attention.
They think black and white as put before.
They fear abandonment.
They normally have deep routed family problems stemming from a poor childhood (look at heather mills).
They cut, mine did.
They are normally depressed then normal, there is no trigger.
They will blame you for all there issues, eventually.
You will slowly see there mates change there attitude about you, until your slowly so sucked in your world resembles hell, with a partner and her friends projecting very negative stuff your way, due to what ever need for attention as been spun at your cost.
This Gets worse and becomes evident the MORE you stay with this type of women.
I considered myself to be trapped, trapped by my love for the perfect angel I had met, trapped by the devil women who was there who had slowly taken over and become the dominant force, like a vampire my energies sucked out and 'this thing' growing from it (seeming to keep pushing for it and relishing in the choas of it all), I cant explain it any better. This emotional turmoil and being married had a very bad effect. Alone I spent a lot of nights, whilst she entertained her attention needs, I put up with it wanting to believe the angel I married, not wanting to see what was in front of my eyes, that the women I was with was in fact nothing more then a man loving SLUT, sad but true. It made me want to end the pain of it (the best way was ......), if this is not manly then so what, we all feel! I am just simply stating truth.
This is your path if you stay on this course.
Her Ex- is probably very happy she is out of the picture, but I imagine there is some residue from this vampire.
I walked away from my partner 1 year ago today for the sake of my health and my mental well-being.
I am still effected and have issues in the form of trusting women, I don’t want to experience this ever again, so I sleep around and in truth I like this way I am. But I am scarred from this and I would expect you to be too, the more this goes on the more scarred you will become.
This is not a healthy situation to be in.
Listen to this story and others, these women are no good and will turn your world upside down, from heaven to hell, the point is how long can you put up being un-happy with a women who shows about as much solidarity as a jellyfish? You cant, so forget about her, which I know is not easy.
Best way is no contact at all, you have it pretty good, some others in this situation have kids and an house, i.e the ex boyfriend, spare a thought for this poor soul who committed his life to a women that was no good, this is you in a few years time.
Though you think you may help, trust me you wont, it will only drain you of your personality until what is left is no better then the thing you are seeing, that you don’t want to see due to love.
Cut it out and find something more healthy even if that means being alone, which tbh is a very great way to be, much better then the alternative which was to be with a women who will simply fu** you up!
What are you staying for or holding on for?
The truth in that question means there exists nothing that can be offered that you truly need, other then your own self respect and preservation, this is priority.
But what does not kill you makes you stronger.
Learn from it, there was a lessen to be learnt from this just like I learned the lesson too.
It us up-o you to translate that message.
GL.
From a man who is all too familiar with this sh**
Also i know some maybe reading this and saying i must have had issue's, i must have had to marry a women with so many red flags. But coming from a background of a loving mother and father and seeing a healthy relationship, my ideas of divorce and seperation was i did not want to be a divorcie, sadly that concept almost blow my world apart.
These women are very bad news.
And as put each point posted is almost a mirror image of the type of women i was married to.
It is good to see there are some very wise men on these boards who can see this before it gets worse, i just wished i was that knowledgable at the time, but hey!
One thing i noticed that is not present here.
It seems the more stornger you are and what some would call ALPHA, the more they stay and push until slowley that ALPHA is been changed to BETA then the sh** really hits the fan.
But being ALPHA is simply not an means to make this better, it is simply a challange for this women to break you!
This is a motivating factor and trust me there mental state they cant help to keep chipping away like an emotional vampire until your mental state is as screwed as theres, then they feel like they have proved something to themselves. It is very very messed up. It is relentless and it can be brutal! A True ALPHA would walk out on the sh** to start with, only a fool would put up with it! In truth.
