Response to a text dumping?

[Murk]

Hey guys,

What would you respond to this text (if anything, tempted to just ignore completely. Basically we had an argument at the weekend, she talked to me like crap so I walked and left her. Limited communication this week, attitude and I called her twice (she didn't answer my first call on Monday)

Me: Shall I just leave you alone?
Her: I think as hard as it is, it's probably best we go our separate ways
Her: Don't you think?
Her: It's sh*t but so it being together sometimes

(sometime later)

Her: What do you think? Wanna talk on the phone later?


So shall I just say nothing? Drop a "No it's fine, good luck with everything x."?

I don't feel like dignifying this sh*t with a response, just go ghost/next.

 

[way2smart]

You have to agree and say "Yes I agree, I have been thinking about going separate ways too. Good luck with everything"
And leave it at that.

I bet she will be begging for you to come back in about a week.

 

[Urbanyst]

Its over.

Keep wasting your own time if you want.

If I responded again at all I would say something like: "If you're ever horny, you have my number. Otherwise I wish you the best. Bye".

 

[Murk]

Agreed but we have been here a few times and end up getting back to get and banging again. It’s like she wants my permission but I’ve been saying recently it’s fine the she back tracks. I’ll miss the sweet walls.

 

[soulforge]

Agreed but we have been here a few times and end up getting back to get and banging again. It’s like she wants my permission but I’ve been saying recently it’s fine the she back tracks. I’ll miss the sweet walls.

This is a toxic cycle... breaking up, getting back together... She knows you will be back, thats why she is asking what you think?

She is testing you metal.. See how weak you are!

I would either agree, with break up and tell her you have been considering breaking up anyway..

Or just ignore and ghost.. Infact it was HER who suggested the break up and ignored your call... I would totally GHOST her... For good this time!

This relationship is dead... When she suggested ending it.. TRUST me its over!

 

[KingofPuss]

Just respond with "Agreed". Don't answer anything else. Going ghost makes you look too butt hurt, and anymore explanation makes you look needy.

If she calls repeatedly, answer the second or third time. Tell her you don't have much to say, but that you agree. Sound as nonchalant as possible. Don't talk to her again for at least a week. Let her stir. She wants you to beg for her back and when she doesn't get it she'll squirm

 

[Murk]

Went with “Agreed”. Woke up this morning blocked, and horny, but free.

 

[Pandora]

Bruh the texting almost has no relation to how they really feel about you. Never ever take the text stuff seriously. Its soo difficult not to though. I fall into that trap myself sometimes. It is always better to either talk on the phone or see her face to face. Over text they can live in a fantasy world. You are nothing but words on a screen. In real life they are reminded why they are attracted to you. Always do the real thing. Never the virtual.

 

[Murk]

Bruh the texting almost has no relation to how they really feel about you. Never ever take the text stuff seriously. Its soo difficult not to though. I fall into that trap myself sometimes. It is always better to either talk on the phone or see her face to face. Over text they can live in a fantasy world. You are nothing but words on a screen. In real life they are reminded why they are attracted to you. Always do the real thing. Never the virtual.

I'm fully aware of that, but why drag this toxic relationship out?

She will end up calling me at the weekend drunk wanting me to come over anyway, at least this way I can show strength and bang her but keep her at arms length as this year I need to focus and improve myself and she really wan't allowing me to do that.

 

[Pandora]

I'm fully aware of that, but why drag this toxic relationship out?

She will end up calling me at the weekend drunk wanting me to come over anyway, at least this way I can show strength and bang her but keep her at arms length as this year I need to focus and improve myself and she really wan't allowing me to do that.

Oh yeh drop the insane chick. I thought you were asking whether or not to respond over text. My bad.

 

[Glassguy]

I'm fully aware of that, but why drag this toxic relationship out?

She will end up calling me at the weekend drunk wanting me to come over anyway, at least this way I can show strength and bang her but keep her at arms length as this year I need to focus and improve myself and she really wan't allowing me to do that.

Why would you answer her call? So you can fail this test too like the others, and she will know you're nothing but a drunk phone call away from her putting you right back into the toxic cycle?

If she called me late night this weekend, AT MOST she would get would be a text the next day saying "I saw your call. Whats up?".

She is clearly in control of this situation and you talking to her anymore about it is only telling her that you are "ok with her treating you poorly". You did the right thing and left the situation when she was disrespectful. Since this has been an reoccurring issue, you made the mistake of going back. Now the threat of leaving is real, but the threat of you walking away (for good) is not. Merely letting her have the drama and control she is looking for while you come back with your tail between your legs.

I would have done things differently. I would NEVER have said "Do you just want me to leave you alone?" as that is a total chump line and needy. You might as well have said "well I will be here when you decide I am good enough to come around you again".

You also called her again after she didnt answer the first time. Another insecure move. Since you were already in that needy position, when she asked if I wanted to talk later I would have said "Nah. I dont have anything to say besides I need to get away from this situation with you as it never works out. Peace out" and went ghost.

I would have done it like this:

Me: We need make up sex. Wear that cute thong I like and be here at 8 (in which she probably would have done just that because you are leading her instead of being needy/insecure about the situation). But if she gave me the same line as you.....
Her: As hard as it is, we need to go our separate ways.
Me: Sounds good to me, and I have felt that way for a while. Best of luck.
Her: Its shyte but so is being together sometimes.
Me: Silence. She would not hear from me again unless she came begging me to fvck her after a minimum of a week NC.

Given the situation of this repeated cycle, get the fvck away from this women. There are thousands of hot women that are more compatible without the disrespect. Go find one or three of them and start fresh. This time with more self respect and a tighter grip on your boundaries.

 

[Murk]

Great advice glass guy.

My initial "should I just leave you alone" was in response to her previous messages which I could detect a tone. Then she came out with the above.

I've realised I'm not blocked just had my number deleted so her pic is not showing on Whatsapp but I've seen her "online". I'll prob get a drunken call this weekend so trying to make myself busy.

I've arranged a date for next Friday and going to try get some low level peasant to my place this weekend as I've just cleaned it top to bottom.

Oh, and I did a 5k run after work yday - first I've ever done. Feeling good.

 

[dude99]

Hey guys,

What would you respond to this text (if anything, tempted to just ignore completely. Basically we had an argument at the weekend, she talked to me like crap so I walked and left her. Limited communication this week, attitude and I called her twice (she didn't answer my first call on Monday)

Me: Shall I just leave you alone?
Her: I think as hard as it is, it's probably best we go our separate ways
Her: Don't you think?
Her: It's sh*t but so it being together sometimes

(sometime later)

Her: What do you think? Wanna talk on the phone later?


So shall I just say nothing? Drop a "No it's fine, good luck with everything x."?

I don't feel like dignifying this sh*t with a response, just go ghost/next.

You say this

"I'm glad i'm not the only one feeling this way. Such a burden lifted off of my shoulders. I am relieved. You take care and goodbye."

Delete all contact. Block all points of contact. Go meet and date new women.

 

[Murk]

You say this

"I'm glad i'm not the only one feeling this way. Such a burden lifted off of my shoulders. I am relieved. You take care and goodbye."

Delete all contact. Block all points of contact. Go meet and date new women.

Well I went with "agreed" and ceased contact - same thing right.

If she calls me drunk this weekend wanting a seeing to - I may be drunk too so should I just get her over to mine and boot her out in the morning or go to hers and leave as soon as I wake up.

If I can't find something to smash this weekend I may cave.

 

[dude99]

Well I went with "agreed" and ceased contact - same thing right.

If she calls me drunk this weekend wanting a seeing to - I may be drunk too so should I just get her over to mine and boot her out in the morning or go to hers and leave as soon as I wake up.

If I can't find something to smash this weekend I may cave.

I would say cut all contact. Ignore and move on, but you are admitting to a weakness, so follow this advice.


Always always go there. This way you can leave. When you dump them, do it there. When you pump and dump. Do it there. You can leave.

If she comes to your place and decides to go all emotional roller coaster on you, nothing is more annoying when you have schit to do or somewhere to be and THEY WONT LEAVE!!

Preferebly just cut bait. But of you cave to your weakness......do it there.

 

[soulforge]

Op is weak.. And is looking for excuses to start this toxic cycle again!

Op she dumped you.. Where is your sense of self respect.. You seem to be lowering yourself again and for sex with her.

She dumped you man, have some dignity and walk away from this toxic cycle!

 

[Murk]

OP is in a moment of weakness but not weak. I just arranged drinks with a hb 7/8 blonde for mid week next week. I've met this girl twice and she came back to mine both times (practically begged). That is what I needed, a guaranteed bang. There will be no going back to the ex this weekend for me. Thanks for all the advice and criticism, that's why I like this forum, you get that slap in the face you sometimes need.

Onward and upward.

 

[Von]

Bang another chick. That you must.

Drop and block the Thread girl... she seems to be your master or pants in the LTR.

No points in banging an Ex... you will just get her to spam you more.

So go back to being single, block, bang another chick.. Even a hooker will do.

Time to move on, come back only when you have a new plate (fwb)

 

[Andrewdiceclay]

All you say is best of luck with everything.

Pisses the girl off, she gets upset you don't care, gives you the upper hand.

 

[Murk]

When do I ask for some clothes I had at her place? It's nothing urgent so I'm happy to wait a few weeks but there some some of my favourite comfy lounging clothes there. Shall I just forget about them?