Post the link to your online dating profile here and have it critiqued.

[Francisco d'Anconia]

Originally posted by AgonyUncle
My match must be:

A nymphomaniac supermodel who can cook like Jamie Oliver, with his and hers season tickets to Anfield and parents that own a brewery. But I am willing to compromise

No one can say who their ideal match is until they have met the person and discovered if there is indeed any chemistry. Dont really have a type, but attractive, self reliant intelligent women who laugh at my corny jokes are always fun to meet.

The his and hers season tickets would seal the deal though.

Never done an online personal in my life, and I do tend offend some birds when I cold aproach. Thought this online dating thing might be worth a bash to add to the pub crawl. Describing myself is not the probelm, its putting together something about my match thats the prob.

Let me know what you chaps think.

I get where you are going but something tells me that it's a bit much. Use the same premise and message but tone down the sexual innuendo, and add some info about yourself in a humorous way. Your second paragraph and your closing line are pretty good.

 

[Magnatolia]

Hi Guys, please critique my two profiles. The first one is a direct link, but the second one I had to copy and paste the info. Idiotic dating site wouldn't let anyone view profiles unless they were logged into an account. The picture is the same one on both profiles.

http://www.lovehappens.com/profile/Jasonjw.html

SECOND PROFILE:::


Hi there, how's it going?

I'm a shy guy, but warm up once I get to know people. I haven't done a lot of things in life but love experiencing new things.


MY ESSAYS


MY STORY AND THINGS YOU SHOULD KNOW ABOUT ME

I haven't had the chance to do a lot since I left school. I didn't stay in contact with my friends and have been working full-time ever since.

I'm a relief officer in Brisbane City Council, which allows me to spend a couple months in each position. So far I'm on track to follow my aspiration of joining a couple of temp agencies and working around the world (it's not a goal as I don't believe in setting goals or plans as things don't always go your way).

I tend to take life one day at a time which is probably why I like the frequent moving around that my job entails. And my holidays. I'm the sort of person who likes to rock up to my destination as early as possible and wander the streets looking for vacancies.

So if I've triggered your curiosity, interest or whatever then send me

I WOULD LIKE TO BE INTRODUCED TO SOMEONE WHO...

Even harder than the question above. I guess I'm looking for someone who is attractive (who isn't ), but they need to have a nice personality. Somebody who knows how to laugh, isn't judgmental. I'm not really into the pub/clubs etc, but have no problem going along every now and then.

Okay, I'd like someone who likes watching movies and tv, doesn't expect me to be into sport (unless it's tennis).

I can't think of anything else - every person is different and it's much easier to find the chemistry in person than through a list of 'requirements'.

WHEN IT COMES TO A WOMAN, MY HEART POUNDS WHEN I'M AROUND

I'm attracted to everything - however what really gets my heart pounding is a woman's face. The more natural the better - personally heavy makeup that isn't the same colour as the feature is a turn off - I like makeup that 'enhances' a woman's features.

Hair colour - blondes and brunettes are like magnets to my eyes, they're instant head-turners.

Eyes - wow, looking into a womans blue eyes - my favourite, but I don't choose who I'm interested in based on this.

Hair - I love the smooth silky feeling of a womans hair running between my fingers, curling it around my finger.

And my all time favourite feature - a woman's smile. I love it when a woman smiles which is probably why I joke a lot to draw out that smile. The type of smile that lights up the room, alluring and addictive.

 

[Francisco d'Anconia]

Originally posted by Magnatolia
Hi Guys, please critique my two profiles. ...

Yawn and double yawn... I couldn't get past the second line in the first profile. Too much self deprecation, not attractive. Where has making excuses for oneself ever seemed attractive?

Second profile is more of the same, boring. Pick it up a bit, make a catchy headline that would make a woman want to read your profile. Then write something that she would like to read.

Sounds simple but guys don't do this. They write what THEY would like to read. You're writing for your potential mate, write what SHE would like to read about you.

 

[Brian20o2]

Its not really a personal but I have myspace. http://myspace.com/brian20o2
Tell me what ya think

 

[Francisco d'Anconia]

Originally posted by Brian20o2
Its not really a personal but I have myspace. http://myspace.com/brian20o2
Tell me what ya think

Surprisingly good . Even though the page looks a bit busy, the music rocked, you used some c/f which was good. I'd add a little more funny in the "who'd I like to meet" part. Add another diss about people who aren't real.

You're doing well because you got social proof from a couple of hotties that said that they liked your pictures, that definitely tells you that you are on the right track. Consider updating your pictures every couple of weeks or so. Include action shots of you at parties, playing sports or just being a goofball. Women tend to gravitate toward guys that are confident to show their many facets.

 

[Brian20o2]

Originally posted by Francisco d'Anconia
Surprisingly good . Even though the page looks a bit busy, the music rocked, you used some c/f which was good. I'd add a little more funny in the "who'd I like to meet" part. Add another diss about people who aren't real.

You're doing well because you got social proof from a couple of hotties that said that they liked your pictures, that definitely tells you that you are on the right track. Consider updating your pictures every couple of weeks or so. Include action shots of you at parties, playing sports or just being a goofball. Women tend to gravitate toward guys that are confident to show their many facets.

Thanks. Ill try out your sugestions.

 

[Brian20o2]

Tried updating my "Who I'de like to meet" area. http://myspace.com/brian20o2 Tell me what ya think now. I love constructive criticism.

 

[Dimebag_Darrell]

yeah. I'm stoned

 

[Francisco d'Anconia]

Originally posted by Brian20o2
Tried updating my "Who I'de like to meet" area. http://myspace.com/brian20o2 Tell me what ya think now. I love constructive criticism.

The Richard Simmons line is kind of funny. The ego line is good if it isn't taken seriously. The last line isn't quite right, it could be scary to some.

 

[SamePendo]

Haha funny ****. I put Player_Supreme's profile, of course translated, with the changes that that brings. And guess what? They said it was innapropiate. And that my name was innapropiate too. Goddamn, it's my name! So it's blocked until I change it.





Next time I get the spur to make a online profile, I'll do it on a less restricted portal. Goddamn.. I mean, that's my ****ing name!

 

[Francisco d'Anconia]

Bumping this because I'm curious on what some of you guys are posting that's not getting you the attention you're looking for.

 

[poohead]

this is my profile text. let me know what you think:

Interests
Money Power Respect

About Me
I am a bad boy and an adventurer. I live for danger. I enjoy pushing myself in the pursuit of excellence in all my endeavors. I am prone to exploratory excitability, impulsiveness, and disorderliness. I am a novelty seeker, my motto is live fast die pretty. I enjoy forming deep connections with interesting people who will teach me new things about myself.

I believe that I'm destined for great things. I am goal oriented and ambitious. I own my own home, am a member of Mensa, have a master's degree, a good job, play several instruments, am an avid reader, and I also know many obscure and interesting facts about pop culture.

I am a rebel without a cause, a cool dude in a motorcycle jacket, a real life Huckleberry Finn, a wounded, moody, dreamer. A seducer, a daredevil. A man of mystery and a fascinating paradox. I'm both a lost little boy and a man with a dark side. I can break your heart with my wicked ways, and also make you long to rescue me from my pain. I may be hurtfully cruel, sometimes careless or self absorbed, you still can't resist the urge to give me your heart - at which point i will be gone with the wind.

If you have major baggage, are sexually repressed or have issues with men please don't contact me. Unless you happen to be Jennifer, in which case you owe me 500 dollars.

First Date
Video games or bowling. Maybe a root beer float at A&W.

Parking in the forest preserve and listening to Led Zeppelin in the backseat while we make out and drink beers. Sneaking you home way past your cufew.

A lot of kissing and some dramatic talk about how nobody understands us, and how someday we'll leave this town and never look back again.

 

[Francisco d'Anconia]

this is my profile text. let me know what you think:

I got two sentences into it and said to myself "a woman is going to think he's full of himself." There's a lot to be said about being confident and even a little ****y, but it seems as if you are trying a bit too hard. Women may feel that you are overcompensating for not being anything like the person you are describing.

Take your opening line "money, power, respect." You are saying that you hold highly that for you that money and power gains respect. So how does that relate to women? We're all told about how women are shortchanged money and power wise, so where are they on the respect scale (at least in your eyes). I'm not saying that it's necessarily true, just that women will perceive it that way.

I understand your premise but remember that you're not writing your profile for other men. Back to the drawing board....

 

[poohead]

i'm not changing it.

take me or leave me. that profile was supposed to be humorous and satirical too.

 

[Jin]

here ya go... http://www.myspace.com/flyer_kaz

I'm mainly doing it to meet new friends and find old ones...

but its pretty cool overall..

Best,

Jin aka- Kaz

 

[Francisco d'Anconia]

i'm not changing it.

take me or leave me. that profile was supposed to be humorous and satirical too.

So what was the purpose of posting it to be critiqued?