Porn... and nightclubs

[cordoncordon]

You know Cordon,
I thought I would just not respond to you and that would be that... but you do have a way of getting under a persons skin - and I'm a bit bored so... here's my reply (although not in full) and as polite as possible :


Citation needed.

I'm being positive about this, if the above is true, thats all I can ask for at this stage and it can only get better.


Based on vast studies done by you and...? [again citation needed]

I actually met a rocket scientist once... and as you can imagine, he was a real clever guy. I asked him many questions and patiently waited while he spewed some of his logic into my eager mind, and that was it.
I never really commented about his world because... I didnt know sh!t about it. Does this ring any bells?


Do you have any idea how long is a normal shoot? Let me give you a clue, its no where close to what you see as the final product.

A single scene can go on for hours for a 20-30 min final product, and in-between this you have loads of time talking to the models and interacting, joking, laughing and what not. No pressure - you know what you are going to do.

We also fcuk when the cameras are not running.. as when we are coping the disks to computer backup or changing lights. We also joke while fcuking - yes, i know, news to you.

A lot of them have boyfriends, husbands, children etc and just like being out of the house and having fun (I AM a good lay (been told this), I give good head (practice) and if needed I can not *** for ages and can be hard for ages without tablets).
Please stop commenting about stuff you have no idea in the world about.

You seem to like throwing your achievements and background around, I come from the porn and IT industry... seriously, you want to talk money? Innovation? contacts?

As for hot women, tell me the age (18-35) you like them at (or the body type) and I'll send you dozens of models that you can rate... all of who I have banged and have proof on film. 8's? 9's? 10's? you decide.
Note that I dont only bang porn stars, but first timers too, even virgins so lets not talk about the "quality of women" based on looks either please.
A lot of these women have other jobs, or are studying... everything from hairdressing to law... and yes, accounting since you seem to think thats some sort of pinnacle.

Once introduced I have little trouble with women in and out of the industry, but walking up to or meeting new women in the "wild" thats where I DO have trouble and why I came here for help as well as 'steering' conversations as I run dry (and panic) pretty soon with "normal" girls. There I have little doubt your skills are x times x better than me... and yes, that is frustrating that I am so bad at it.

In all other aspects... I am pretty much a normal guy like everyone else, nothing slick about me, not flashy either.:wave:

You say yourself that you would leave the industry if you found the right women, and yet you keep justifying the industry and the people in it. But why would you leave then unless you know deep down its a sketchy job and no self respecting woman would want to date you? Makes no sense.

You are rationalizing....I understand. You are in the business so of course you want to make it sound as good as possible. Human nature. As far as needing a study to know if any self respecting, classy, educated woman is going to want to meet and date, and maybe even marry a person involved in porn....I don't need a study. It's common sense. It's real life observations. It's from talking to women for my entire life. I can't imagine a college educated, attractive, family oriented woman bringing you home to mom and dad and having them ask what you do for a living. And hell, forget about all of that. Lets say everything you say is true. That there is little criminal element involved in porn (BS), that most of the girls don't have mental issues (BS), that most of the girls aren't into drugs (BS)....lets assume all of that is true. Just the stigma alone of porn being an industry full of sexual diseases and HIV is enough to drive any self respecting woman away.

You say if you find the right woman you would leave the industry. How do you expect to find the right woman doing what you do? Any normal woman is going to see what you do and have that raise SERIOUS red flags for them that would make it next to impossible for them ever to take you seriously or want to date you. Hell, MEN have enough problems dating a girl involved in porn, I can't even imagine what a woman dating a man involved in porn would think. So why don't you leave the industry now? Find a job using your video skills in a more constructive and meaningful manner? Nothing is stopping you.

 

[Franky Four Fingers]

Sorry for saying this but I think this is nuts with a capital N.

Pornpot, I didn't read the whole thread but as I understand it your having sex with 8's. 9's, & 10's on a regular basis. And YOU are getting paid in addition.

The majority of guys, not just on sosuave, but Everywhere would want to be in the position (no pun intended) that you are in.

I know you want a relationship and want to succeed outside of your industry but consider yourself fortunate.

Here's a perfect thread to illustrate why you should feel fortunate;
http://www.sosuave.net/forum/showthread.php?t=178864

In that thread there are stories of women who are 4's & 5's turning down suave DJ's that are in great physical shape WITH good game.

Send me a PM on how to get into your job. No kidding.

 

[cordoncordon]

Sorry for saying this but I think this is nuts with a capital N.

Pornpot, I didn't read the whole thread but as I understand it your having sex with 8's. 9's, & 10's on a regular basis. And YOU are getting paid in addition.

The majority of guys, not just on sosuave, but Everywhere would want to be in the position (no pun intended) that you are in.

I know you want a relationship and want to succeed outside of your industry but consider yourself fortunate.

Here's a perfect thread to illustrate why you should feel fortunate;
http://www.sosuave.net/forum/showthread.php?t=178864

In that thread there are stories of women who are 4's & 5's turning down suave DJ's that are in great physical shape WITH good game.

Send me a PM on how to get into your job. No kidding.

No, you have it wrong. He is paying them to appear in pornos with him, and is wondering why he has trouble communicating with everyday normal girls.

 

[Thundernuts]

No, you have it wrong. He is paying them to appear in pornos with him, and is wondering why he has trouble communicating with everyday normal girls.

you know there is a point where constructive criticism becomes bashing on a guy and your practically there.

Cordoncordon, Pornpot isn't going out trying to find a girl he can spend his life with, all he wants is a girl to give herself to him without having to pay or make arrangements, he wants a relationship, now should that relationship begin to escalate he will leave his industry.

However, the dumb thing to do would be to start something else right now when he's still go no game, he's in a good position right now because he's not looking for the sex so much as he's looking for relationship in its purest form. He's obviously doing good for himself and mildy enjoying what he's doing. Doing porn isn't going to hinder his short game(what he needs to improve at the moment) only his long term relationships(he'll cross that bridge when he gets there)

Listen, if you happen to find that girl that is cool with you doing porn or who will accept what you have done but won't want you to continue then she is probably good enough to stop doing it anyways, youll know when you see her.

 

[cordoncordon]

you know there is a point where constructive criticism becomes bashing on a guy and your practically there.

Cordoncordon, Pornpot isn't going out trying to find a girl he can spend his life with, all he wants is a girl to give herself to him without having to pay or make arrangements, he wants a relationship, now should that relationship begin to escalate he will leave his industry.

I keep harping on it because you guys keep talking about something that is never going to happen unless he makes a drastic career change. You keep talking about all of this stuff he should be doing to make his goal a reality, and none of that matters until the ONE BIG THING is done.

It's like talking to a drug addict on the street about getting a job, living healthy, going to college, without ever facing the root of the problem...getting him off of drugs. The rest is just drivel.

It's simple. Having a career in porn, paying girls to have sex with you is all well and fine if that is what you are into. But one of the things you will sacrifice in having that type of career is having a normal relationship with a normal girl. Until he is ready to sacrifice his job, this entire convo is pointless.

 

[Thundernuts]

@ Franky Four Fingers, being just a pornstar and not owning a small company or producing your own films isn't as lucraztive as what you think. From what I've read and a pornstar i used to know say a woman gets paid 500 a shoot, the guy would only get around 200-300.

Or some ratio like that, bottom line you better have some business savy.

And find an agent for god sakes

 

[Hikapo]

Wow, interesting op. I just wanted to say that you should try and read books on people skills.

I have no problem chatting with random strangers and we can talk forever. However, you have to be genuinely interested in knowing the person. People can tell if you fake it. The art of connecting is key here.


I, on the other hand, is still learning how to be more sexual with the ladies.


You can do it man. Takes time and patience, just like anything you want to succeed in.

 

[noyb2008]

You guys can debate and talk about this all you want, but the bottom line is, and this is 100% accurate...

Okey dokey.

Leaving the self-righteous tone of cordon aside, he may have some valid points. It may be more difficult for you to have a relationship with a classy, upmarket woman - certainly with one who is mainstream in her outlook (and therefore more likely to be boring in my book). So what?

Unless I misunderstood your post, I get the impression that you want to be able to interact with women outside of your professional world for all the same reasons that a normal guy would. It's nice being round girls, it's nice making out with girls, it's nice sleeping with some girls and never seeing them again, it's nice having a passionate fling then moving on, it's nice finding your soulmate and settling down. I don't recall the part where you said you were looking for Mrs Pornpot.

As an aside, may I ask - would you consider having a girl who worked in your industry as a girlfriend?

Also, I would stop trying to justify yourself to cordon. He is not your judge. He has neither the love nor the wisdom to do so.

Moving on now.

Sure! But where the heck is the beginning?

Simple:

1. Get book (get useful posts on this forum, get mp3, get video etc.).
2. Read book.
3. Do what it says in the book.
4. See 3.
5. See 3.
6. If you've done a lot of 3., reflect on your experiences. What did I do right? What did I do wrong? What did I wish I had done?

You say you are a nerd. Use this to your advantage. Years ago I built a database that tracked all of this information. After every approach and every date, I would fill it in as soon as I got home. Over time this built up into a really rich source of information. I learned from it. Really learned.

"Methodology " -ok, where do I get these? I think I had mystery method in one of my ebooks for a while but I never really went through it as I thought its really old (I have had it for ages without opening it).

Girls have not changed in the years that Mystery first wrote it, nor probably in the last 10,000 years. Sure, new pick up 'technology' has come out since then with new angles but mostly new marketing. Remember, all these PU gurus have to continually repackage their stuff so it doesn't get stale.

You have Mystery method. You are a nerd. Great. Now actually read it. For people who like analytical models (I'm one of them) he gives a great explanation of the whole process. It doesn't matter if it is not 100% accurate or the latest thing. Its function is purely to provide a framework for you so you don't feel lost and so you can see how you are doing. When you become an expert, you will ditch all of this stuff and be doing your own thing. But go become an expert first.

Quick question, do you suggest I pick all of them up and read through all and pick a method or pick one up try it and if it fails pick the next one?

I'd stick with one and practise it thoroughly first. Mystery method is a good, clear, first choice. Otherwise you will fall into the trap of becoming an armchair tourist - reading about stuff without doing stuff. I speak from personal experience.

would appreciate a comment on the girls I met AT the strip joint. A bunch of college girls from Belgium who I bought a couple of beers and was chatting with...

Don't see where you wrote about these girls.
I would be happy to comment if you write about it. Also, I am quite surprised by some of the antipathy on this forum. If you wish to discuss other stuff that you aren't happy to post about because of this, feel free to PM me.

Happy hunting!

 

[PornPot]

(replying in the order that I read your replies)

@Cordon, what I kind of get the feeling is you would feel like you "saved someone" or a bunch of "someones" if I leave the industry.
That is up to you dude, I got the same mentality from some reallll religious folk and I have nothing against them for that either.

Anyway, I do not wish to argue, bash, debate or anything else with you.
If you have any helpful tips on improving my game on just meeting new women (forget what I do or any kind or relationship... just meeting them) then please feel free to reply else I dont think I will be replying to you again.

And this I mean in totality: Peace bro.

@Franky,

Dont get me wrong mate, I like doing what I do, and I LOVE sex.

"The majority of guys, not just on sosuave, but Everywhere would want to be in the position (no pun intended) that you are in."

I wouldnt go that far, but it is a good gig and yes, at times I do consider myself very fortunate.

Thanks, I'll read up on that thread (have not seen it before replying here).

And to answer your question, Its not easy getting into this, its a lot about who you know.

Thanks for replying, appreciate it!

"No, you have it wrong. He is paying them to appear in pornos with him, and is wondering why he has trouble communicating with everyday normal girls."
I get paid for when I put the pornos on the site, I need to put more pornos on the site, I pay to get more pornos so that I will get paid. Think of it as a circle.

"he wants a relationship, now should that relationship begin to escalate he will leave his industry."
Thunder, god gave you a real good skill at understanding people. Again, bang on. And I'm not even quoting other things right in your post.

Seriously Cordon? a guy who does drugs and a guy who works in porn...

"I've read and a pornstar i used to know say a woman gets paid 500 a shoot, the guy would only get around 200-300. "
In the US, thats pretty much spot on.
Just some free info: Even in Europe the women get paid muchhh more than the males.

"I just wanted to say that you should try and read books on people skills."
Recommendations? Anything other than whats already been recommended by the good folk here?

"You can do it man. Takes time and patience, just like anything you want to succeed in."
Thank you for the words of encouragement, I appreciate it.

(Sorry my replies above are all over the place.)

 

[cordoncordon]

Okey dokey.

Leaving the self-righteous tone of cordon aside, he may have some valid points. It may be more difficult for you to have a relationship with a classy, upmarket woman - certainly with one who is mainstream in her outlook (and therefore more likely to be boring in my book). So what?

Unless I misunderstood your post, I get the impression that you want to be able to interact with women outside of your professional world for all the same reasons that a normal guy would. It's nice being round girls, it's nice making out with girls, it's nice sleeping with some girls and never seeing them again, it's nice having a passionate fling then moving on, it's nice finding your soulmate and settling down. I don't recall the part where you said you were looking for Mrs Pornpot.

As an aside, may I ask - would you consider having a girl who worked in your industry as a girlfriend?

Also, I would stop trying to justify yourself to cordon. He is not your judge. He has neither the love nor the wisdom to do so.

Moving on now.



Simple:

1. Get book (get useful posts on this forum, get mp3, get video etc.).
2. Read book.
3. Do what it says in the book.
4. See 3.
5. See 3.
6. If you've done a lot of 3., reflect on your experiences. What did I do right? What did I do wrong? What did I wish I had done?

You say you are a nerd. Use this to your advantage. Years ago I built a database that tracked all of this information. After every approach and every date, I would fill it in as soon as I got home. Over time this built up into a really rich source of information. I learned from it. Really learned.



Girls have not changed in the years that Mystery first wrote it, nor probably in the last 10,000 years. Sure, new pick up 'technology' has come out since then with new angles but mostly new marketing. Remember, all these PU gurus have to continually repackage their stuff so it doesn't get stale.

You have Mystery method. You are a nerd. Great. Now actually read it. For people who like analytical models (I'm one of them) he gives a great explanation of the whole process. It doesn't matter if it is not 100% accurate or the latest thing. Its function is purely to provide a framework for you so you don't feel lost and so you can see how you are doing. When you become an expert, you will ditch all of this stuff and be doing your own thing. But go become an expert first.



I'd stick with one and practise it thoroughly first. Mystery method is a good, clear, first choice. Otherwise you will fall into the trap of becoming an armchair tourist - reading about stuff without doing stuff. I speak from personal experience.



Don't see where you wrote about these girls.
I would be happy to comment if you write about it. Also, I am quite surprised by some of the antipathy on this forum. If you wish to discuss other stuff that you aren't happy to post about because of this, feel free to PM me.

Happy hunting!

Porn pot you can do what you want and I wish you all the best, but if its one thing you do, DO NOT LISTEN to this "mystery" "read a book" crap. It's just a bunch of nerds who have no real life experience trying to get you to spend....MONEY. So tired of these guys on here spewing this junk. Read this book! Listen to the tapes! I take cash, check, or charge!
The guys you should listen to and take advice from are the guys like me, and there are many others here as well, who have real life experience. Who have dated 100's of girls, who have had many ltr's and gf's. Who have never read a book, listened to a tape, or attended a seminar on how to pick up girls. The entire thing is just ridiculous.

So read the many posts on here. Read some real life tips and experiences, get people's opinions. But forgot this crap like what noy is saying. He has all of what, 2 posts on this entire site? Trust me he's just someone trying to get you to buy something.

 

[ChanceBoudreaux]

have you thought of making friends with girls and then seeing where it goes from there

the end game of any approach is to bang the girl, plan and simple, and this is what causes most Anxiety with many people myself included , you screw up the approach and she leaves without you having stuck it in her

but the fact that you are getting some on a regular basis kinda takes that edge out of the equation all you need to do is have a regular conversation with her and see where it goes from there with out the dreaded outcome dependence of sex that most guys have lurking in the back of there mind

 

[PornPot]

have you thought of making friends with girls and then seeing where it goes from there

the end game of any approach is to bang the girl, plan and simple, and this is what causes most Anxiety with many people myself included , you screw up the approach and she leaves without you having stuck it in her

but the fact that you are getting some on a regular basis kinda takes that edge out of the equation all you need to do is have a regular conversation with her and see where it goes from there with out the dreaded outcome dependence of sex that most guys have lurking in the back of there mind

Sex is the last thing on my mind.
Went to a pub with a few pals, I was checking it out and a plumpy girl was checking me out. She was with a guy so I just had some fun holding eyes and as some posts on other threads said: be easy and chill, dont give a ****... so thats what i did, and i gave her a small smile after a while and she did the same and looked away.
At the end of it we just left and she was with a guy (date?) so I was just happy but even if I did meet some girl who wanted to fck... it would hav e been a pretty bad one because i had a mega shoot today and need tomorrow to recharge. Shoot again the day after and the day after that.
Was feeling especially good because the girl I banged today, she told me to please stop and she would finish me off via a BJ as her pu55y was paining I felt like a fcuking king
I do a lot of girls but this one was REALLY HOT, firm DD breasts to die for, a lovely snatch, blue eyes and really responsive, one of the best in my career and a 9 or a 10 by most guy's books here. We banged for 3hrs and 3 c*mshots


My approach... a bit flabbergasted at saying the wrong thing (as noted above by thunder: fear of rejected is huge in my head) and once the conversation gets going I blank out or just outright panic on how to hold the conversation, leave alone "steering" the conversation. But I am reading and slowly picking up tips
Sex is not really on my mind because for example take the 5th of nov... I CANNOT have sex that day, because I have a shoot 3,4 and 6,7 if I have sex on 5... i wont be able to shoot properly (and I aint talking about camera shooting now ) on 6,7.
Thanks for the tip though and words of encouragement.

 

[jafyk]

you know there is a point where constructive criticism becomes bashing on a guy and your practically there.

Cordoncordon, Pornpot isn't going out trying to find a girl he can spend his life with, all he wants is a girl to give herself to him without having to pay or make arrangements, he wants a relationship, now should that relationship begin to escalate he will leave his industry.

However, the dumb thing to do would be to start something else right now when he's still go no game, he's in a good position right now because he's not looking for the sex so much as he's looking for relationship in its purest form. He's obviously doing good for himself and mildy enjoying what he's doing. Doing porn isn't going to hinder his short game(what he needs to improve at the moment) only his long term relationships(he'll cross that bridge when he gets there)

Listen, if you happen to find that girl that is cool with you doing porn or who will accept what you have done but won't want you to continue then she is probably good enough to stop doing it anyways, youll know when you see her.

Come on guys! Can't you see both sides of the arguments. DonCordon is right in that most people are hypocrites and especially women (the type Pornpot) seeks to connect with. Since, they most times won't approve of his work they wouldn't want to be associated with that because of the stigma or whatever their reasons may be. They may even personally be ok with it but they might be concerned with others might think of them.
On the other hand PornPot is right that although these women do porn they have another aspect to their life that most of us would consider normal if we didn't know this about them. So, I don't think DonCordon is wrong to say that Pornpot would need to turn things around by leaving the industry altogether. So, he can get out of that environment bla bla bla even then some women will still hold his past against him.
To Pornpot my advice to you is that in your interaction with these women
1) Follow most of the DJ advice you've been given
2) When you are getting to know the women. Let them talk about themselves and you respond. They love talking about themselves afterall. As open-ended questions (questions that require them to describe and explain as opposed yes or no questions which just end the convo)
3) Find other areas of interests for hobbies that way when asked questions about yourself. You actually have something to talk about.
4) You should probably keep your real profession from them initially till you've made that solid connection where you feel they can accept you knowing that stuff about you. You can just tell them for personal and confidential reasons you can't talk about your job. Talk more about your other interests (which you are going to start getting involved in from here on out). If they insist on finding out about your job tell them you do websites and video recording and editing. You haven't lied to them either but you haven't spilled your whole beans. Over time when you see fit you can tell them what you actually do. By them them would've had some sort of investment in you to see past that. Well, hopefully. Hope this helps.

 

[PornPot]

Hey!
Thanks for the tips, you are right I dont have to tell them from the beginning what I do... no real reason to hold up a sign.

You can just tell them for personal and confidential reasons you can't talk about your job.

I like this! It even sounds a bit mysterious...!

Who knows, if the person happens to be really special, i can just leave my past and continue on this new path instead - either way I like your advise.



Oops, for some reason I completely missed Noyb's post... will reply to that as well here:

"I get the impression that you want to be able to interact with women outside of your professional world for all the same reasons that a normal guy would."
Yep.


"I don't recall the part where you said you were looking for Mrs Pornpot."
Am not.

"As an aside, may I ask - would you consider having a girl who worked in your industry as a girlfriend?"
Serious relationship... nope. Fun relationship, yes. I can give you various reasons but the truth *here* is... i am a hypocrite. I dont want other guys banging the girl I am with. I do see the connection and like I said, I admit I am a hypocrite here.

Thanks for the steps mate

Thanks, I think I'll start hitting the mystery method, also enjoy Xuma's videos on YT (I think i mentioned this above? dont like the fact they all end with an offer to buy something tho..) so far i am just cherry picking the videos based on title, but perhaps i should just sit and see them all.

"I'd stick with one and practise it thoroughly first. Mystery method is a good, clear, first choice. Otherwise you will fall into the trap of becoming an armchair tourist - reading about stuff without doing stuff. I speak from personal experience."
I can see that, will do!

"I would be happy to comment if you write about it. Also, I am quite surprised by some of the antipathy on this forum."

You know, when this thread is "done" I think I'll just leave this account and be silent for a few weeks (but read the forum as there is so much good advise here) then come back later on a different username.
That should clear the air.

"Happy hunting!"
First I think it's 'happy reading!'

 

[HariPoter13]

You know what i like about this thread? This thread proves to all the haters out there that fucking hot women on regular basis wont make you happy. It will just leave you feeling empty on the inside. (no offense meant to OP; infact, youre a great addon to the site)

 

[Just a Shot Away]

You know what i like about this thread? This thread proves to all the haters out there that fucking hot women on regular basis wont make you happy. It will just leave you feeling empty on the inside. (no offense meant to OP; infact, youre a great addon to the site)

Sure, but in all fairness he's f.ucking hookers. I can't imagine paying for sex ever being fulfilling when there's guys out there getting it for free.

 

[PornPot]

You know what i like about this thread? This thread proves to all the haters out there that fucking hot women on regular basis wont make you happy. It will just leave you feeling empty on the inside. (no offense meant to OP; infact, youre a great addon to the site)

There are exceptions...
today i had an 18 year old, new to the industry and totally wild.

I didnt ask but she told me she wanted to be spanked, choked, slapped and nips pinched - whats a man to do but sometimes follow what the girl says

She ****ing drained me (4 times on and off camera)... its lucky I dont have a shoot tomorrow, my pen1s actually hurts... and it hurts more when i look at it :crazy: or when someone else in the world thinks of touching it! :nervous:

Sure, but in all fairness he's f.ucking hookers. I can't imagine paying for sex ever being fulfilling

Since this place is an advise forum, even though I came to get some I think I'll contribute as well:
If ever you meet someone who is in the industry and are trying to pick them up being all suave; DON'T EVER make the mistake of comparing them to hookers, escorts or other words like prostitutes, wh***s etc unless you want them to walk away.
Some do it for the money, others dont and they have a very different mindset... call them a who** or any of the words i mentioned above; she might be fantastic with a pen1s but you'll be playing with yours alone that night.

I'm not going to get into the whole fulfillment debate, but its just a few words of advise, take it or throw it away - up to you.

 

[seanj20]

wow this is an interesting thread. can you share some more knowledge? maybe answer some of ChanceBoudreax questions which he posted earlier in this thread?

How'd you get involved with the industry? did you start as a photographer?