Pooks rule 14

[flowtheory]

Reading Pooks lessons again. I have a bit of confusion regarding lesson 14.
“Always have a back-up chick!”

I can understand this idea in the early stages of spinning plates and seeing what’s out there. Becoming abundant.
However, what happens when you find a woman who is worthy of your attention and time; someone YOU have chosen and who actually likes you, for you?
Is he saying even then “always have a back up chick” until you’re engaged or married?
Exclusivity is generally a conversation that happens around two-three months...
So, what then?

 

[mrgoodstuff]

Reading Pooks lessons again. I have a bit of confusion regarding lesson 14.
“Always have a back-up chick!”

I can understand this idea in the early stages of spinning plates and seeing what’s out there. Becoming abundant.
However, what happens when you find a woman who is worthy of your attention and time; someone YOU have chosen and who actually likes you, for you?
Is he saying even then “always have a back up chick” until you’re engaged or married?
Exclusivity is generally a conversation that happens around two-three months...
So, what then?

I agree with pook and supreme that a man should first be a successful player. I

You should never get so far out the game you don't have a couple you can pound.

 

[Spaz]

Reading Pooks lessons again. I have a bit of confusion regarding lesson 14.
“Always have a back-up chick!”

I can understand this idea in the early stages of spinning plates and seeing what’s out there. Becoming abundant.
However, what happens when you find a woman who is worthy of your attention and time; someone YOU have chosen and who actually likes you, for you?
Is he saying even then “always have a back up chick” until you’re engaged or married?
Exclusivity is generally a conversation that happens around two-three months...
So, what then?

Anything wrong 4 a man 2 hv orbiters ?

 

[Toddz]

It means to always maintain a social circle which includes women, preferably single women.

Most dudes mess up on this when they become exclusive with a chick. They ghost all the girls they're seeing when they become committed to one plate because they think their new GF wouldn't approve of it. This is foolish because he just tossed all his options out the window. All a bro has to do is tell his new chick that he has friends that are men and friends that are women, enough said. If she gives you a problem, then deuces...

 

[Paradiddle]

Like Toddz said, It means that once a date with a chick goes well, men start ignoring the ones they were talking to or had future prospects. This should not be the case.

 

[Serenity]

I'm engaged now, but I have female friends still. I maintain good game, because I don't want to start if this ends and you kinda need good game to keep a chick interested over time. I don't physically do anything with other girls, there's boundaries of course, but I don't ignore them either.

So pretty much what @Toddz said. My GF has felt jealous a few times because of my female friends, she didn't fear I'd cheat, she was worried what my female friends could do. I told my GF that I am under no circumstance turning away friends over jealousy, that's a hard rule. I also told her it's me she should trust, not them, it's my job to reject any potential advances. This solved the problem.

I mean, any girl who can't accept a guy having female friends do not deserve a boyfriend. The opposite must apply though.

 

[sazc]

I'm engaged now, but I have female friends still. I maintain good game, because I don't want to start if this ends and you kinda need good game to keep a chick interested over time. I don't physically do anything with other girls, there's boundaries of course, but I don't ignore them either.

So pretty much what @Toddz said. My GF has felt jealous a few times because of my female friends, she didn't fear I'd cheat, she was worried what my female friends could do. I told my GF that I am under no circumstance turning away friends over jealousy, that's a hard rule. I also told her it's me she should trust, not them, it's my job to reject any potential advances. This solved the problem.

I mean, any girl who can't accept a guy having female friends do not deserve a boyfriend. The opposite must apply though.

You realize this flies in the face of what it's advocated on this website for women?

Drop all male friends asap, otherwise she isn't really into you and it's looking to beach swing when she can.

I'm glad that you have found equilibrium and trust in your relationship

 

[marmel75]

Reading Pooks lessons again. I have a bit of confusion regarding lesson 14.
“Always have a back-up chick!”

I can understand this idea in the early stages of spinning plates and seeing what’s out there. Becoming abundant.
However, what happens when you find a woman who is worthy of your attention and time; someone YOU have chosen and who actually likes you, for you?
Is he saying even then “always have a back up chick” until you’re engaged or married?
Exclusivity is generally a conversation that happens around two-three months...
So, what then?

If you have banged enough other chicks good enough leading up to this point you will always have them willing to come back for some d!ck down the road...

 

[flowtheory]

I'm engaged now, but I have female friends still. I maintain good game, because I don't want to start if this ends and you kinda need good game to keep a chick interested over time. I don't physically do anything with other girls, there's boundaries of course, but I don't ignore them either.

So pretty much what @Toddz said. My GF has felt jealous a few times because of my female friends, she didn't fear I'd cheat, she was worried what my female friends could do. I told my GF that I am under no circumstance turning away friends over jealousy, that's a hard rule. I also told her it's me she should trust, not them, it's my job to reject any potential advances. This solved the problem

Wouldn’t all this be disrespectful to the woman you’re with in a long term setting if you’re entertaining other women’s interest, hanging out one-on-one with them; then in-turn create an unessary risk, huge energy drain and potential game of jealousy with your woman, who you’ve chosen to be faithful to?

 

[Serenity]

You realize this flies in the face of what it's advocated on this website for women?

Drop all male friends asap, otherwise she isn't really into you and it's looking to beach swing when she can.

I'm glad that you have found equilibrium and trust in your relationship

It probably does, but it is absurd that one cannot have friends of the opposite sex. I find it to be more of an expression of their own insecurity and lack of trust if the partner can't have friends of the opposite sex.

Wouldn’t all this be disrespectful to the woman you’re with in a long term setting if you’re entertaining other women’s interest, hanging out one-on-one with them; then in-turn create an unessary risk, huge energy drain and potential game of jealousy with your woman, who you’ve chosen to be faithful to?

Disrespectful? Yes, if I start making out with my female friends and do things I'm not supposed to do. If she doesn't trust that then what should I do? Tell my friends to fvck off so my GF can keep me in a cage? Hell no! I said very early in our relationship that I have female friends and I'm not going to tolerate jealousy.

She can accept it or find a man that will ditch a bunch of friends for her. I won't compromise on this, I'm not unfaithful because I have platonic friends of the opposite sex. I'm not entertaining their interest, I will notice if they're a bit more interested than they should be and put a stop to it. This can only work with women who agree to just friendship.

Just last night I had a party, I invited a female friend. They've become friends because of me. No drama, no bullsh!t. It is not my job to bend to my girlfriends jealousy, she has to manage it and she decides how much she's bothered by it. She accepts it, but she was hesitant at first.

 

[flowtheory]

Stop thinking like a girl

Men don’t cheat until we put our dlck in another vagina

Women have much smaller margin for cheating error

If she’s making eye contact or not swerving guys that hit on her while you’re committed to her, she’s garbage

That’s a double standard and hypocritical.

 

[flowtheory]

No it’s not. Are you blind? Our standards are NOT THE SAME

Thinking that they are is feminine conditioning. You were trained to think that the way you were trained to believe in soul mates and transcendental unconditional love

Stop living in fantasy land

And if that discussion came up with you, your woman, and a group of people. Do you actually think you would be able to reason that way of thinking, and have the overall groups support?

I’m trying to learn, so I’m looking for explanations that have a solid theory so I can conduct myself better. So assist me in seeing your reasoning.

Why is it acceptable for a man to do anything under the sun except for cross the boundary of physicality - “stick his d!ck in her” - whereas a woman is not even aloud to look/checkout another male and has to swerve his come-one and flirting? Why would that make her garbage?

 

[flowtheory]

Because you are a MAN

And you can provide for her much more than she can ever provide for you. The very act of committing to ONE woman even goes against the purpose of our gender: throughout history, men have had harems and weaklings didn’t even reproduce. Superior men had multiple women because they were able defeat competitors and secure what was theirs while ensuring that those women they mates with gave birth to most viable offspring. It’s encoded into almost every living creature on this planet. The species continues because of the strong, the weak perish

It’s the same as when 2 male elephant seals fight to the bloody death for their Harem of females or why the most beautiful male peacocks are the ones that mate. Because the idea is that only a strong healthy male will look vibrant and have the strength to support such an elaborate tail piece that’s disadvantageous to his own survival (to escape from predators). In one case, the male proves he’s strong enough to protect the females and offspring and in the other, he proves his superiority superficially by signaling health and the ability to make himself the target of predation in order for the females and offspring to survive

Yes it’s true, that women are invaluable in that they’re the bearers of offspring, but the truth is that one high value male is worth more than multiple females. One high value male will produce high value offspring and so the species continues to propagate and so on.

Did you know that a very large chunk of the entire human population are direct descendants of Ghengis khan? What he did may sound fvcked up when you read about it, but we owe a great deal of the population to him.

And so commuting to one women should be seen for what it is. A sublimation/sacrifice of what YOU were born to do in order to fulfill and satisfy what SHE was born to do. Any woman you commit to should practically worship you for it. Not be something she naturally expects of you. So when she gets out of line, you shouldn’t feel the least bit bad about being hard on her and constantly reminding her that she can lose you to other women if she’s not on point

That’s intense. So radically different than what is normal in our society.

New goal: build harem of women and have many babies to make the population of 3018 descendants of flowtheory to take over the world.

 

[BeExcellent]

Because you are a MAN

And you can provide for her much more than she can ever provide for you.

LMAO. Good luck with expecting a quality woman to put up with you acting like an ass with no character and keeping you around.

But that's why you don't see any quality women isn't it? Give that some thought. The jaded men here who are really in the woman hating camp are so thinly veiled and so very obvious as to be caricatures. SMH.

Oh yes...we are emperors who are worthy of queens and empresses. Please. If you have no character (i.e. you think there are double standards for behavior based on gender) and think men are entitled to be unfaithful and use people and yet at the same time are expecting loyalty from your woman?

Best to stay in ONS or short term relationships and never love any one. Because with that attitude all you are going to end up with are garbage women any way. You aren't good enough for anything better, sorry.

Water seeks it own level. Look in the mirror. You will attract a female version of what you find there.

 

[ImTheDoubleGreatest!]

OP, men and women are different. It is disadvantageous in an evolutionary sense for women to have multiple male partners, whereas the opposite holds true for men. The only biological reason why a woman would continue to have male friends is because she is looking for a better mate. Men, not necessarily so because it is just who we are. Plus, women are more impulsive than men. When they feel attraction towards a man, they cannot help it at all. They can’t do anything about it. And if they ignore their desires (towards anything, not just men), then it ****s them up mentally. It’s just how they are. Men are able to resist though. Even though our sexual urges are stronger, we are still more conscious of ourselves overall than women are. That’s where the difference lies.

Did you know that a very large chunk of the entire human population are direct descendants of Ghengis khan?

~1%

 

[ImTheDoubleGreatest!]

LMAO. Good luck with expecting a quality woman to put up with you acting like an ass with no character and keeping you around.

But that's why you don't see any quality women isn't it? Give that some thought. The jaded men here who are really in the woman hating camp are so thinly veiled and so very obvious as to be caricatures. SMH.

Oh yes...we are emperors who are worthy of queens and empresses. Please. If you have no character (i.e. you think there are double standards for behavior based on gender) and think men are entitled to be unfaithful and use people and yet at the same time are expecting loyalty from your woman?

Best to stay in ONS or short term relationships and never love any one. Because with that attitude all you are going to end up with are garbage women any way. You aren't good enough for anything better, sorry.

Water seeks it own level. Look in the mirror. You will attract a female version of what you find there.

You are reading his post from a woman’s view. Look at it from a man’s instead. It’s not insulting, it’s about what is and what isn’t.

 

[BeExcellent]

People are individuals. Generalizations exist. I was raised that until there is both a RING and a WEDDING there are NO guarantees. And even a marriage is not a guarantee. There are no guarantees and there are no absolutes. Binary thinking is pure foolishness. And this thread is full of binary thinking.

That is why Pook suggests keeping a back up woman (or women). To keep from being too oneitis driven, and to remain desirable in the marketplace. To keep options in your universe. Women do this, because most women are well aware that until there is a ring and a wedding there is no commitment. Now the fact that so many women cut off sex I find disturbing. That is awful and I can understand men being afraid of that...but pick a woman who isn't going to do that. How can you accomplish that? Follow Pook's 14th Rule (among other things.)

My grandparents would have advised the same thing 50 years ago. Because unless someone is willing to be committed? Then they are not. It's that simple. The person you marry is the single most important decision you make in life. Too few people take that choice as seriously as they should, and if you don't have the maturity to choose well and demand high standards? Stay single. Easy.

But unless you choose to reveal yourself to another human being you'll never experience intimacy and you'll never know deep love, which is a basic human desire and need. And no, you do not have to be married to have that. But most women in their youth who are worth having as wives expect to be married. And last I checked having kids still requires a female. Best to have an outstanding one. If you can't choose from the best females then keep working on yourself and keep your eyes open. You might run across someone amazing when you least expect it.

Even the most loving, happy couples have no guarantees. My mother-in-law LOVED her husband. They had by all accounts a fantastic marriage and she was a virgin on her wedding night. She talks about how SACRED the sexual aspect of marriage was. How delighted she was to share that with her husband. One day he died unexpectedly. She was 38 years old with two adolescent children. No guarantees folks.

 

[BeExcellent]

ITDG of course I read from a woman's perspective. But I see the man's view. I also see all the jadedness and distrust that many men here hold in their psyche. I understand that the playing field is biased and I know that a chick sharing a different view is not always welcome. Most of the men here are here as a direct result of bad experiences. It's important to remember that when reading the threads because you aren't getting the perspectives of men who ARE pleased in their marriages, almost none of those men are here...but they exist, even here.

Casanova (who married Penkitten), Colossus and others who have passed through here are married and pleased to have a partner for their life journey. Other men here aspire to have good relationships, possibly good marriages, and those guys are learning how to better themselves to become men who are discriminating, masculine leaders who can attract the women who are worth the risk of commitment. Grewd is engaged as he noted...and he's mentioned over the past couple of years that he has a good woman. Atom Smasher has found someone incredible (and he notes that his chick would NEVER have given him the time of day when he first came here), and there are others who are enjoying good LTR arrangements even if they never marry or remarry.

Be very careful about drinking the bitter vinegar of someone else's sour grapes. Better to learn all you can and keep your own counsel because you could very well run into someone worthwhile. And worthwhile women have choices. So you make yourself her best option if you expect to be hers.

A man's perspective is fine, but if you want to have successful relationships with women you are going to have to consider a woman's perspective as well at some point. It's a two person journey. Both peoples perspectives have value even if only one (the man please...) leads.

 

[Serenity]

@MidnightCity You've got a lot to learn. There's a difference between friends and orbiters btw.

 

[flowtheory]

OP, men and women are different. It is disadvantageous in an evolutionary sense for women to have multiple male partners, whereas the opposite holds true for men. The only biological reason why a woman would continue to have male friends is because she is looking for a better mate. Men, not necessarily so because it is just who we are. Plus, women are more impulsive than men. When they feel attraction towards a man, they cannot help it at all. They can’t do anything about it. And if they ignore their desires (towards anything, not just men), then it ****s them up mentally. It’s just how they are. Men are able to resist though. Even though our sexual urges are stronger, we are still more conscious of ourselves overall than women are. That’s where the difference lies.

~1%

So my girlfriends who have guy friends will likely cheat?