POF: why do i bother.

[Packers2010]

hey guys,

i mad a pof profile and i have spent the last 2 night messaging. I'm pretty must doing this to meet people in my area since i am new. here's my profile.

http://www.pof.com/viewprofile.aspx?profile_id=33479732

the only time i have got any messages back. it when the girl thought i was beeing rude. she would tell me about it then i wold change the convo but she wouldn't buy it.

so i though. i know i'll just change up the messages. send out a bunch of,

" hey hows it going?
your profile is pretty cool so i HAD to message you!

what movies do you like or sports do you like?

anyway i got to shoot hope you find what your looking for on this site"

gets me nothing.

I KNOW i am doing something wrong, i know this isn't to do with looks either. i should get SOME uggos messaging. ( law of averages) but i get nothing, can you help me out?

 

[Leopold]

Um.. I think this is a bit obvious...

Cut the sweets, hit the gym hard, stop sticking your tongue like a lil piggy, burn the sonic t shirt.

Tough Love... Go at it man

 

[bukowski_merit]

Even 1's are getting more messages than most guys will get on POF (this is because guys will chase the top girls when they first get on; realize most of them are only going for the top guys, and slowly degrade their standards to the point they're hitting on women they'd never give a second glance to in public.) It's just the way things are setup there.

POF is 80% pics, 20% content of your words. That's the reality of this game.

Women saying "you're being rude" is a result of them not being attracted to you. Create a profile with a generic hot guy and say the same thing to them and I'd bet $100 they are more receptive.

What your pics tell me is you're a goof ball (the 3rd pic with the girl pulling on the back of your neck is HORRIBLE dude). That's not the image you want to present on a dating site (At least not if you want to sexually attract women.) I know you're trying to be the whole "cool nerd" thing; to appear outgoing... But unless you find the perfect girl who is looking for just that - you're going to have 0 success as is.

Let's take a look at the profile:

I’m all about making myself better, I’m not a self improvement freak, but well yes I AM a self improvement freak. Deal with it. I like it how I feel about my life and that my life gets better every day.

This is pretty bad. The "Deal with it" seems completely rude and out of place. Why would one have to "Deal with" you liking self improvement? Is there an anti-self improvement movement among women where you live?

This profile would be more entertaining if you said "I like to snort coke off the ass of strippers. Deal with it!" ... I'm not even kidding...

I have a confection to make, I’m such a typical sports fan that i get out my jersey and hold the ball in my lap, if we wind up together please schedule spa visits, shoe shopping, or male bashing with girlfriends during important sorting events, it will make both of our life’s better.

I'm not even sure what you're trying to do here. You're lost and it's obvious; you don't even know what to put here. You're not putting any emotion into this; it's all just "this - that - this - that - this"... It's just hollow words...

if you want to know more just shoot me a message. i'll reply if i got the time.

Complete and total uncalibrated arrogance. This.... is why sosuave can fvck people up. You're presenting what you believe you should and it's not authentic.

Women.... Can overlook such things if the guy has a look to make up for it...

something low key, 12 course dinner with 14 deserts with someone sinning love songs in the background. you know. LOW KEY.

LEGIT GIRLS: over the top and ridiculous,playfulness In nature, quiet and loud, sexy plus gorgeous, has to be girlie,Funny t-shirt wearing, Knows when to Hold 'em and Fold 'em, sits in coffee shops All day, 4am breakfast, knows how to cook, Spontaneous combustion, has a sense of style, Meet the Press VS the colbert report. Nerds can have fun too, has to be a big Hugger, knows how to make a drink, Free loving, knows how to shop, Pants droppin, Earth shock, Arm Rockin, booty shakin, love makin, History makin, LEGENDARY GIRL!

This isn't horrible. Although your list of demands goes on a bit long... I'd cut it down to a few of the best stuff... Which is pretty much everything you wrote before "knows how to cook"...


Overall: I know nothing about you from your profile other than that you seem like you're confused. And that your ****iness does not match the way you look in your pictures.


3 things:
1) Get better pictures. I don't care if you have to take 1000 pictures - if you want success online - you need 2-3 good pictures. If this requires working on your style, body, etc - there's nothing wrong with that.... You do like self-improvement afterall. (without this - 2 & 3 will not matter)
2) Rewrite your profile and engage the reader with something interesting. Evoke emotions....
3) Stop sending a message that looks the same as 90% of the other people. When sending a message to a woman on there - engage her.

That's it.

 

[Packers2010]

Um.. I think this is a bit obvious...

Cut the sweets, hit the gym hard, stop sticking your tongue like a lil piggy, burn the sonic t shirt.

Tough Love... Go at it man

i hate you. ( obvs i know it's true. just need the tough love bit)

i have found an uggo, i could set something up for the weekend.

i also have changed what i wrote on my profile.

what's wrong with my sonic shirt it's awesome!


thanks for the input also.

 

[Packers2010]

@bukowski_merit

thanks for the ti[s man, i have much to work on. i have written something different there now. but it dose just state what i am looking for.

it might be better if i just close the account down all together and come back in 6 months when i have got my stuff together. i haven't been to well these past few days, i now have abdominal pain so. once i get over that i will look into a gym of sorts or something.

if you haven't noticed, i did rep you in a positive way. don't know if you care or not i just thought your post was very informative for me. i think i am jumping the gun without working on myself. i have been noticing this, i think its time to do something about it.

 

[the_stig]

Your profile looks good right now. Short and sweet with some wit.

Now, focus on your pictures as they'll make or break you. Go out, get dressed up, do your hair, and look important. Women will respond much more positively.

Also, don't take this the wrong way, but start making yourself over. When I lost 40lbs (dropped down to 150) it made all the difference in the world. Not just because I looked better, but I gained the confidence to back it up. How well you carry yourself is another make or break. The dark rimmed glasses aren't doing you any favors, ditch them for contacts.

Just like in nature, the dating world is the survival of the fittest, and every detail counts.

 

[Borknagar]

Honestly, size wize, I don't see anything wrong, you do look like a guy that might have lost some weight in the past though, maybe thats just me though, I agree with the others, style your hair, maybe use a bit of product or something, and change your cloths, that's for sure. hitting the gym would be an advangate as well, at your size it wouldn't take long. And also consider contacts as well, the glasses are kinda a bit too emo

 

[backbreaker]

I mean... i lova ya bro, but i'm just going to address the 800 pound gorilla in the room.

you are overweight and people are very superficial. trust me I've been there. people buy the sizzle and not the steak. and your profile has very little sizzle and a little b it too much steak.


I mean.. look, let's keep it real. ask yourself, what do you do when you click on a broads profile? I don';t give, 2 ****s about what she says or doesn't say. I mean i'm married but if i were to get online i probalby wouldn't even know the woman's name, i'm just looking at pics and what gets me hard is what i will respond to.

it's cold but it's the truth. people are just shallow at the end of the day. I'm not very different neither are you.

i would shut the account down until you got in shape and put b etter pics up.


like on the real, you aren't fat fat. you just aren't in shape.you do not have the look that will make a girl look twice, and that's what it takes online i would imagine. Just focus on some HIIT stuff, cut the fat level down, read starting strength, eat clean as a mofo for 3 months and bam oyu are in there.

 

[st_99]

dating online is all about looks. p90x bro. do it.

you're not a lard ass so the results should be really good.

 

[bukowski_merit]

@bukowski_merit

it might be better if i just close the account down all together and come back in 6 months when i have got my stuff together. i haven't been to well these past few days, i now have abdominal pain so. once i get over that i will look into a gym of sorts or something.

It's not SUPER important offline; i mean, super tight game can overcome not being in the best physical shape. I mean, i know people who are way more overweight than you appear... and blah blah blah they fvck women in the boatloads.... But really - online game is soooo much different. I used to have generic, crappy pictures of myself on my dating profiles... And thought they were "good enough"... Good enough is not good enough though! You need 2-3 great photos... I had 1 great photo for the longest time, and that was even better than 4-5 average ones.... But yeah, work on yourself... Get in the gym AND get a better diet... Get pictures taken and take pictures of yourself constantly, and use OKCupids "My best face" website to identify good pictures. Read the results! See what photos beat what photos and what photos beat yours.... You can learn from this... You can start now, or wait until you're more confident about your look.

If you stayed the same: There's this movie called "sex drive" and you kind of remind me of the pickup artist character in the movie (Lance). He looks like he has the same build as you, similar hair, and glasses... He's just better groomed and has a lot more style (dress wise, and swagger wise).... Might want to check it out...

Here's a little clip: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=tOIbFeVrthM&feature=related

 

[Packers2010]

@ the_stig

thanks for the kind words

@ Borknagar

most of my clothes involve some form of nerd print on them, though those arn't my " going out" shirts, just my every day ones.

once i start getting in shape and stuff i will get some polos or something for " everyday" use or something.

i would shut the account down until you got in shape and put b etter pics up.

this is what i was thinking, was going to shut it down, then i saw i had 2 messages from girl i had messaged so going to leave it open till they fizzle our, then close it down.

if my words are ok then i will just work on my self image. I KNOW it could do with a tone up or more.

 

[Packers2010]

dating online is all about looks. p90x bro. do it.

you're not a lard ass so the results should be really good.

that's one of my biggest challenges, i have no idea about anyone of this stuff. i know if i tired a bicep curl i would hurt myself or some stupid ****.

i have just googled p90x i will take a look into doing it thanks.

 

[Packers2010]

It's not SUPER important offline; i mean, super tight game can overcome not being in the best physical shape. I mean, i know people who are way more overweight than you appear... and blah blah blah they fvck women in the boatloads.... But really - online game is soooo much different. I used to have generic, crappy pictures of myself on my dating profiles... And thought they were "good enough"... Good enough is not good enough though! You need 2-3 great photos... I had 1 great photo for the longest time, and that was even better than 4-5 average ones.... But yeah, work on yourself... Get in the gym AND get a better diet... Get pictures taken and take pictures of yourself constantly, and use OKCupids "My best face" website to identify good pictures. Read the results! See what photos beat what photos and what photos beat yours.... You can learn from this... You can start now, or wait until you're more confident about your look.

If you stayed the same: There's this movie called "sex drive" and you kind of remind me of the pickup artist character in the movie (Lance). He looks like he has the same build as you, similar hair, and glasses... He's just better groomed and has a lot more style (dress wise, and swagger wise).... Might want to check it out...

Here's a little clip: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=tOIbFeVrthM&feature=related

thanks for the compliment.

i will check out the movie.

i DO have dress style. though i mostly only pull it out during "nights out"

i do wear a lot of ****s with graphics on them, like mario and sonic and stuff. i mostly only where them around the house and when i go shopping on the weekends. i did wear one to a concert once and got opened buy it. IE nostalgia reasons, though if you have some better tips i would love to hear them, if there is a thread on all this i would love to read it.

i have gotten some cool hoodies and jeans that fit me well recently and a few shirts with writing on them. would you advice against these. also most of the time, if i go out i always where a dress shirt. i have so many ben shermans ones it's re**** and nice.

i am going to buy some new ones when it's summer because it's winter now and i don't need any, have too many sonic ones. though i am also going to try out this -]p90x workout thing. so if i do this then i will get the shirts after.


edit: dude i know this is a movie and all but it looks soo sick and i could learn a lot from it. also the guy you mentioned is an awesome actor. i love him in Greek ( yes i wasted my time watching a season of that **** awhile back)

 

[runner83]

Are you going to stalk me?


Wtf?!?

Previous posters have already said it.

My best piece of advice would be to close down the online dating profile, since it is about 80% looks and at the moment, you don't have it.

Sorry to sound harsh, but your pics aren't that great, and when combined with a profile that's a bit too edgy, I doubt you will get many positive responses.

Focus on improving yourself and get out there in real life instead, it will be better for you (and also for any guy) in the long run.

 

[Poonani Maker]

Had one of another race ask me out on the 7th, didn't notice until the 15th, so I haven't responded. She has a nice petite body, a picture of her rock climbing. She wants to go for a drink. Looks fillipino, not sure. She looks too trusting and I know I'd just fvck her and leave her so I don't think I'll contact her, but that kinda took balls on her part to ask me out, just because she thought I seemed like a "dynamic intelligent man." At least she has a good eye. That's a plus.

 

[LoneWolf]

omg don't bother. I use to do this ... although I have met a few girls on these dating sites and fuked them too, it's just seriously NOT worth the hassle. I got many headaches trying to score a girl and it wasn't worth it. Messaged hundreds of girls, spend hours on them sites, got rejected a lot! met girls who flaked half way in the date. it's all fuked up on those sites. Unless you're Brad Pitt and rich, don't bother lol. They're seriously only looking for hot stuff on there and/or attention. DO NOT BOTHER!

 

[Packers2010]

Are you going to stalk me?


Wtf?!?

Previous posters have already said it.

My best piece of advice would be to close down the online dating profile, since it is about 80% looks and at the moment, you don't have it.

Sorry to sound harsh, but your pics aren't that great, and when combined with a profile that's a bit too edgy, I doubt you will get many positive responses.

Focus on improving yourself and get out there in real life instead, it will be better for you (and also for any guy) in the long run.

we are way past this.

i'm in the process of closing my account down. waiting for the last few messages to dry up.

downloading the 8gb mammoth that is p90x as we speak.

going to post a well soon. also going to post my life story ( been watching californication so i've been writing.)

it's all go. sir full stem ahead.

SEX DRIVE:

i thought the movie was ok. the lead girl was hot. ending was a little week. the guy who you thought was me was so spot on though lol. just need more game.

 

[Packers2010]

Had one of another race ask me out on the 7th, didn't notice until the 15th, so I haven't responded. She has a nice petite body, a picture of her rock climbing. She wants to go for a drink. Looks fillipino, not sure. She looks too trusting and I know I'd just fvck her and leave her so I don't think I'll contact her, but that kinda took balls on her part to ask me out, just because she thought I seemed like a "dynamic intelligent man." At least she has a good eye. That's a plus.

i don't know what your point is here, other then you have 10000 times more game then me.

i am going to close the account now. this thread can be pretty much over once i make my well. witch i need to get onto. will work on it tonight.

i know i'm not going to do the online thing for awhile again.

 

[LoneWolf]

It's not SUPER important offline; i mean, super tight game can overcome not being in the best physical shape. I mean, i know people who are way more overweight than you appear... and blah blah blah they fvck women in the boatloads.... But really - online game is soooo much different. I used to have generic, crappy pictures of myself on my dating profiles... And thought they were "good enough"... Good enough is not good enough though! You need 2-3 great photos... I had 1 great photo for the longest time, and that was even better than 4-5 average ones.... But yeah, work on yourself... Get in the gym AND get a better diet... Get pictures taken and take pictures of yourself constantly, and use OKCupids "My best face" website to identify good pictures. Read the results! See what photos beat what photos and what photos beat yours.... You can learn from this... You can start now, or wait until you're more confident about your look.

If you stayed the same: There's this movie called "sex drive" and you kind of remind me of the pickup artist character in the movie (Lance). He looks like he has the same build as you, similar hair, and glasses... He's just better groomed and has a lot more style (dress wise, and swagger wise).... Might want to check it out...

Here's a little clip: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=tOIbFeVrthM&feature=related

lol I actually watched that whole clip. Reminds me of myself back in my teen years ... the memories of how easy it was to score a lay. Parties every weekend. If I knew what I knew today, I'd be bangin like a rabbit every party. Very useful info in that clip. perfect example of the mr nice guy/chicken

 

[cordoncordon]

we are way past this.

i'm in the process of closing my account down. waiting for the last few messages to dry up.

downloading the 8gb mammoth that is p90x as we speak.

going to post a well soon. also going to post my life story ( been watching californication so i've been writing.)

it's all go. sir full stem ahead.

SEX DRIVE:

i thought the movie was ok. the lead girl was hot. ending was a little week. the guy who you thought was me was so spot on though lol. just need more game.

Ahhhh yes P 90 X, now you are talking right up my alley. I am not going to try and discourage you, as I think it is great that you are wanting to get into better shape, but be prepared. Oh yes, be VERY prepared...and scared, for the most intense and painful training of your life. P90x is not something you can just half do, you either do it 100% or you don't. And that goes from eating right, sleeping right, taking the proper supplements, to doing the actual training. And as for that actual training....it is 6 days a week, at least an hour a day, of pure torture. After the first 2-3 days you will feel like a truck ran over you, or you have the flu. I have played sports all my life, lifted weights for 15 years, and after the first few days I was like wtf???

You will have probably puked and wanted to pass out after a week. You are going to need dumbbells, a chin up bar, bands, and push up bars. And 100% pure effort on your part.

But it is well worth it. I have done it for a year now (3 cycles) am in the best shape of my life and get complimented all the time on my physique. I just bought p90x2 and am ready to start that for a whole new round of torture haha.

Best of luck and let us know your progress.