Pattern w HB9-10’s and Hot / Cold

GunShow85

Don Juan
Joined
Jan 26, 2016
Messages
88
Reaction score
53
I’ve mentioned this before but just happened again and I think it’s fascinating. Here is the pattern of extreme hot & cold and I’m curious from a psychological perspective what is going on?
(And before you say it, I’m not chasing these girls)

This same thing happened with 3 different girls:

-Hang out with HB9-10
-A few weeks in (date 4-5), girl starts talking about having a baby etc. Brings up constantly and very serious (this shocked me first time)
-A week goes by and they go cold

-then rinse and repeat

my guess:
Crazy - to talk about raising a family together with a guy you barely know. Don’t try to rationalize crazy

Motherly Instinct- girl hitting wall at age 28-31 and starting to get worried about having family. Strong drive to have kid

Stability - I well employed/stable etc and maybe that’s what they want in father

Other guys- HB 9-10 has dozens of other great guys chasing them and possible to forget about me

Caught up in the moment- maybe while having fun and in my presence, they get carried away and start to envision Disney family

Goes cold because I don’t reach out for a few days (but they don't either)

Hot/Crazy Matrix- If you’re a 10 and still not wifed up by age 30, something must be off

I’m not interested in these girls but really just curious (a) has this happened to others (b) what were they thinking. In fact, maybe my low interest was a factor in them going cold. We’ve all heard of super crazy girls doing this on first day, but all of these girls don’t appear crazy (except for this).
Thank you
 

Lookatu

Master Don Juan
Joined
Jun 26, 2017
Messages
3,127
Reaction score
3,935
Age
52
Those are all very valid reasons and scenarios. Girls always want everything on their time/schedule/convenience. If you don't fit into that, there are several that will, given the current market. It also depends on what kind of vibe you give them which alters their perception of you.

Are you giving them a more stable, successful, provider vibe?
When you say you went out on 4-5 dates, was there sex involved at any point?
Do you generally move slow or fast with girls?
What country are you in?
What age group are you targeting?

As an experiment, you could always go along with it and see where/how it pans out.
 

BackInTheGame78

Moderator
Joined
Sep 10, 2014
Messages
14,672
Reaction score
15,827
I’ve mentioned this before but just happened again and I think it’s fascinating. Here is the pattern of extreme hot & cold and I’m curious from a psychological perspective what is going on?
(And before you say it, I’m not chasing these girls)

This same thing happened with 3 different girls:

-Hang out with HB9-10
-A few weeks in (date 4-5), girl starts talking about having a baby etc. Brings up constantly and very serious (this shocked me first time)
-A week goes by and they go cold

-then rinse and repeat

my guess:
Crazy - to talk about raising a family together with a guy you barely know. Don’t try to rationalize crazy

Motherly Instinct- girl hitting wall at age 28-31 and starting to get worried about having family. Strong drive to have kid

Stability - I well employed/stable etc and maybe that’s what they want in father

Other guys- HB 9-10 has dozens of other great guys chasing them and possible to forget about me

Caught up in the moment- maybe while having fun and in my presence, they get carried away and start to envision Disney family

Goes cold because I don’t reach out for a few days (but they don't either)

Hot/Crazy Matrix- If you’re a 10 and still not wifed up by age 30, something must be off

I’m not interested in these girls but really just curious (a) has this happened to others (b) what were they thinking. In fact, maybe my low interest was a factor in them going cold. We’ve all heard of super crazy girls doing this on first day, but all of these girls don’t appear crazy (except for this).
Thank you
It sounds like a mix of crazy, clock is ticking and they view you as the type they would want to settle down with. Did you have sex or escalate to anything more than kissing with these women?

To be bringing this up in a serious way within the first few dates would probably have me running for the hills because this chick is going to be looking to get pregnant by someone...do not let it be you!

She will tell you she is on the pill, she wants you to take the condom off etc... Don't fall for it bro...you will have her locked in for at least 18 years on your payroll...
 

GunShow85

Don Juan
Joined
Jan 26, 2016
Messages
88
Reaction score
53
All good points.
I’d rather not give out personal info.
Why do you think they switch to cold?

Hard to imagine going from ‘I’d like to spend rest of my life with you” to “oh, I saw your text and didn’t care for another date” in a matter of days (with no other factors except maybe they w someone else)
 

Lookatu

Master Don Juan
Joined
Jun 26, 2017
Messages
3,127
Reaction score
3,935
Age
52
All good points.
I’d rather not give out personal info.
Why do you think they switch to cold?

Hard to imagine going from ‘I’d like to spend rest of my life with you” to “oh, I saw your text and didn’t care for another date” in a matter of days (with no other factors except maybe they w someone else)
They have too many other options they may be more interested in. If you don't cave, whiteknight, be the person SHE wants, she will get it from someone else. Just hold your course and remain steadfast. Her loss...

When women say those things, sometimes they will say the same thing to 10 other guys they went out with. They are just words.

Point is their loss and no need to think about it. Find someone that is more in alignment to what YOU want.
 

Create self-fulfilling prophecies. Always assume the positive. Assume she likes you. Assume she wants to talk to you. Assume she wants to go out with you. When you think positive, positive things happen.

Quote taken from The SoSuave Guide to Women and Dating, which you can read for FREE.

GunShow85

Don Juan
Joined
Jan 26, 2016
Messages
88
Reaction score
53
They have too many other options they may be more interested in. Her loss...

When women say those things, sometimes they will say the same thing to 10 other guys they went out with. They are just words.

Point is their loss and no need to think about it. Find someone that is more in alignment to what YOU want.
That’s what I needed to hear. They are just words
Case closed, you can delete this thread if you want.
Thx for the advice.
 

flowtheory

Master Don Juan
Joined
Apr 18, 2018
Messages
1,687
Reaction score
1,416
Age
36
Location
So Cal
With really hot women, they know they can pick from whoever.

The MOST important thing with hot 9-10 women is YOU have to have your life in your order. It’s dating normal (6-8’s) women on the hardest level. They test more and care less until you’re in a proper relationship. They have more attention from everyone - society, men and women - but even when you’re in a proper relationship, understand the competition doesn’t go away.

They ask the questions about settling down and all of that to see what you’re going to do. I’ve found when dating these types, it like everything is a game or a test. It’s not so much about building a true connection right from the start. Especially if they’re 27+ As they’ve been exposed to a lot of flattery and chasing by that age.

An important rule for all men is really to just flip the script to qualify them! Ask them difficult questions, be laconic towards some of their questions. It’s about pulling them in, get them pursuing/chasing. It’s very difficult to do if you don’t have a lot going for you in other realms aside from the dating world.
The best women (not just hot) go for the men who have things going for them.

Most men are just playing house with most women. Or they are just the one validating all their needs until the woman gets truly bored.
 

r4zorsharp

Banned
Joined
Oct 3, 2020
Messages
246
Reaction score
320
Age
33
She's 100% just playing around with your head.. Guys are so friggin naive these days.. especially withw omen who are 9's and 10's who are far confident than 95% of guys out there.. She is telling and trying a diff game with every guy she talks to.. you just happened to get the crazy sh.t meaning she doesn't value as much as other guys .. and the fact that you're still showing her interest, tells her ur her bi.tch
 

GunShow85

Don Juan
Joined
Jan 26, 2016
Messages
88
Reaction score
53
Razorsharp- Just clarify its 3 different girls. But I’m open to the fact lots of girls doing this so I’m not naive. I assure I’m not showing interest. In fact, part of my question is how often do you all experience this sorta assumes lots of girls telling multiple guys this. But I get your point.

Flowtheory- That’s a good point but I’m not trying to get any of them, but just curious if others experienced this.
 

flowtheory

Master Don Juan
Joined
Apr 18, 2018
Messages
1,687
Reaction score
1,416
Age
36
Location
So Cal
Razorsharp- Just clarify its 3 different girls. But I’m open to the fact lots of girls doing this so I’m not naive. I assure I’m not showing interest. In fact, part of my question is how often do you all experience this sorta assumes lots of girls telling multiple guys this. But I get your point.

Flowtheory- That’s a good point but I’m not trying to get any of them, but just curious if others experienced this.
If you could funnel your post in to one Or two questions, what would it be?
 

It doesn't matter how good-looking you are, how romantic you are, how funny you are... or anything else. If she doesn't have something INVESTED in you and the relationship, preferably quite a LOT invested, she'll dump you, without even the slightest hesitation, as soon as someone a little more "interesting" comes along.

Quote taken from The SoSuave Guide to Women and Dating, which you can read for FREE.

Black Widow Void

Master Don Juan
Joined
Feb 24, 2010
Messages
2,176
Reaction score
3,841
The "10" term is subjective (we all have our personal definition). Just to give you an idea of my perspective and where I'm coming from, I've probably had one... and then a few "9's" ... many "8's", countless "7's" . And yes, I've also taken home my share of "ranks" that I'd rather not admit.

It's rare to come across a "9" or "10" that openly expresses any marital anxiety to a male interest. They've been conditioned and are typically more smug about the issue (openly, that is).
Even more rare is a woman of such caliber that only within several dates is talking about marriage/children.
Are you really sure that you're talking about "10's" here? This behavior doesn't sound like it at all.

I've had my share of marital pressure (around 10 instances). I'll list my situations and maybe something might resonate with you.

The first one (just before getting ready to do the deed) asked what would I do if she became pregnant. I was much more liberal in those days and I said "abortion." I had a condom and explained that I was prepared. She was sixteen (though doubtfully a virgin) and the deed didn't happen. I suspect that she saw me as an opportunity and I saw her as a neighborhood lay (I was 18. going to college / working and lived on my own). She was probably considered a "6" with an "8" body.

Although I've received the passive/aggressive marriage subject plenty of times, only one gave me an ultimatum. This was after a year. She was fine for the moment, but I didn't see her as "till death do us part" material. She dropped me, went out with a friend of mine and they later got married (now divorced, surprise surprise). This one was an "7" with an above average personality and intellect.

You can look at this two ways.
1. You are considered a good catch
and/or
2. They are looking to fill a position and see you as a candidate.

The one's I didn't mention apparently thought I was worth being around - no matter. The two above, seemed to be looking for a position to fill and it didn't matter if it was me or someone else. When I didn't cave to their whim's, they looked for someone that potentially would.
 

flowtheory

Master Don Juan
Joined
Apr 18, 2018
Messages
1,687
Reaction score
1,416
Age
36
Location
So Cal
The "10" term is subjective (we all have our personal definition). Just to give you an idea of my perspective and where I'm coming from, I've probably had one... and then a few "9's" ... many "8's", countless "7's" . And yes, I've also taken home my share of "ranks" that I'd rather not admit.

It's rare to come across a "9" or "10" that openly expresses any marital anxiety to a male interest. They've been conditioned and are typically more smug about the issue (openly, that is).
Even more rare is a woman of such caliber that only within several dates is talking about marriage/children.
Are you really sure that you're talking about "10's" here? This behavior doesn't sound like it at all.

I've had my share of marital pressure (around 10 instances). I'll list my situations and maybe something might resonate with you.

The first one (just before getting ready to do the deed) asked what would I do if she became pregnant. I was much more liberal in those days and I said "abortion." I had a condom and explained that I was prepared. She was sixteen (though doubtfully a virgin) and the deed didn't happen. I suspect that she saw me as an opportunity and I saw her as a neighborhood lay (I was 18. going to college / working and lived on my own). She was probably considered a "6" with an "8" body.

Although I've received the passive/aggressive marriage subject plenty of times, only one gave me an ultimatum. This was after a year. She was fine for the moment, but I didn't see her as "till death do us part" material. She dropped me, went out with a friend of mine and they later got married (now divorced, surprise surprise). This one was an "7" with an above average personality and intellect.

You can look at this two ways.
1. You are considered a good catch
and/or
2. They are looking to fill a position and see you as a candidate.

The one's I didn't mention apparently thought I was worth being around - no matter. The two above, seemed to be looking for a position to fill and it didn't matter if it was me or someone else. When I didn't cave to their whim's, they looked for someone that potentially would.
And some women are certainly just looking for a man to take their sh!t and acquiesce to their demands. Some women truly need all the power in relationships, only masked by saying they want a real man. But when they get push back, they can become tyrants and won’t stand for it. It’s a loss-lose for them really
 

GunShow85

Don Juan
Joined
Jan 26, 2016
Messages
88
Reaction score
53
Hot women are basically always hot/cold now
agreed. I think having so many options makes them hot/cold. My guess is they really do like you but then the next guy, etc makes them lose interest

HB9 go out with a great guy and he shows her fun night, etc. Then next day another Chad takes her to lunch. She meets a hot guy at the gym. Then guy flirts with her at lunch. She leads each of them on with flirting and even falls for one but short memory when next guy arrives. It is weird though, I meet lots of hot girls and it would never occur to me to mention kids, much less do that and then get disinterested.
 

7onriverI f

Banned
Joined
Jan 31, 2020
Messages
610
Reaction score
294
I would be incredibly horny with the prospect of banging them and getting them pregnant. Only problem is time spending on all the girls and kids i have made after the fact. Fark even before banging them spending the 2 hours on less or more to bang them is the real problem. I Like it though but working 50 hours a week and then playing cards all weekend and gyming is time consuming enough. Cant imagine having multiple women and heaps of kids to put time into. They need a playground at all the venues I go to and one of them actually does. Girls and their babies can play there.
 
Top