I'm trying to say I went down that road and did not help like the site says it made things worse, they thought I had no soul.Freddy1 said:
Mabye being obessed and one-it-is'd about a girl is still okay as long as you have game?
ONEITIS - Lets Be Honest
- Thread starter muttley
- Start date
Mabye being obessed and one-it-is'd about a girl is still okay as long as you have game?
Not a really a misunderstanding just postin.
But part of what the site says is game is not liking her when that has only ever been used as a reason to not like me.
So I'm saying could that idea be wrong? Whether I go into stalker or mode or not-give-a-**** mode it does not work because of something totally seperate. Does YOUR not falling in love with her really have an effect? lol when you think of it why the fvck did anybody think that created attraction. Can't you fall in love and still try to be interesting? Because not falling in love never works just kills your soul.
But part of what the site says is game is not liking her when that has only ever been used as a reason to not like me.
So I'm saying could that idea be wrong? Whether I go into stalker or mode or not-give-a-**** mode it does not work because of something totally seperate. Does YOUR not falling in love with her really have an effect? lol when you think of it why the fvck did anybody think that created attraction. Can't you fall in love and still try to be interesting? Because not falling in love never works just kills your soul.
typical
Master Don Juan
Bvbidd spill ya guts bro you got some tension your holding back let it out, like really let it out. You seem very very confused about the whole dating and DJ thing.
The thing I will point out though is how can you as a yourself (yes your fu(ked up inner self) fall in love with a girl whom you have only known for lets say 3 months.
Think about that, don't become a stalker guy (what would you do if a girl stalked you and you did at one point have interest but right now you don't wanna see them) and nor do you turn into a heartless prick who doesnt give a fu(k.
You go do you thing pick up girls bang em if you want not cause this site or your buddies tell you to bang her, you want to progress it further hell fall in love but hold back a bit test the waters ain't no point getting hurt over some chick who doesnt love you back.
Trust me man you can friggen tell when the girl/s your dating have gone AFC on you and are falling hard for you, thats when you decide to push it into a exclusive relationship or break it off and go after more chicks, its your choice.
Also when your gaming more then one girl at a time you seem to be less emotionally attached to each they may fall head over heels for you, but for some reason you don't (you care for them alot) ........... lets just say having more then one girl gives you a insurance policy so that if things don't work with one girl you replace her with another ......... always have at least 2 in your harem.
The thing I will point out though is how can you as a yourself (yes your fu(ked up inner self) fall in love with a girl whom you have only known for lets say 3 months.
Think about that, don't become a stalker guy (what would you do if a girl stalked you and you did at one point have interest but right now you don't wanna see them) and nor do you turn into a heartless prick who doesnt give a fu(k.
You go do you thing pick up girls bang em if you want not cause this site or your buddies tell you to bang her, you want to progress it further hell fall in love but hold back a bit test the waters ain't no point getting hurt over some chick who doesnt love you back.
Trust me man you can friggen tell when the girl/s your dating have gone AFC on you and are falling hard for you, thats when you decide to push it into a exclusive relationship or break it off and go after more chicks, its your choice.
Also when your gaming more then one girl at a time you seem to be less emotionally attached to each they may fall head over heels for you, but for some reason you don't (you care for them alot) ........... lets just say having more then one girl gives you a insurance policy so that if things don't work with one girl you replace her with another ......... always have at least 2 in your harem.
The issue of ONEitis wont go away.
Alot of guys sooner or later would want kids in their life. (Unless they are going to take the dead beat dad route). Ageing does that to you.
Believe me TIME passes by really fast in life.
Honestly how many of us can see ourselves as a lonely 70yr old man with no wife, no kids, lying by yourself at a hospital on your death bed.
You want someone whose going to be there for you.
Alot of guys sooner or later would want kids in their life. (Unless they are going to take the dead beat dad route). Ageing does that to you.
Believe me TIME passes by really fast in life.
Honestly how many of us can see ourselves as a lonely 70yr old man with no wife, no kids, lying by yourself at a hospital on your death bed.
You want someone whose going to be there for you.
I have to agree, these threads really do help a lot. Over the past year I have dealt with a really nasty case of oneitis. It was the worst experience of my life and every day felt like torture.
Now that I am starting to make progress and don't feel the constant pain and emotional attachment to this girl, I must say that I feel stronger than I ever have in the past, even before I went through the oneitis.
Threads like these and others have really helped me to examine myself more closely and work on improving my life. I am thinking in an entirely different manner now. Instead of depending on others for happiness or just hoping things will change, I am actually taking action and being proactive in my life. I never realized just how much I was drifting through life and letting fear control me until I went through this very painful experience with oneitis.
I would never wish the experience I went through on my worst enemy, but I honestly must say that now that I am over it and have moved on, it may very well be the most important and influential event that I have encountered in my life. So if you are going through oneitis, just continue to work on improving yourself and do your best to break that emotional attachment you have with the girl. It may take a very long time and it is a constant struggle, but when you conquer it and move on, you will be a much stronger and more capable person.
Now that I am starting to make progress and don't feel the constant pain and emotional attachment to this girl, I must say that I feel stronger than I ever have in the past, even before I went through the oneitis.
Threads like these and others have really helped me to examine myself more closely and work on improving my life. I am thinking in an entirely different manner now. Instead of depending on others for happiness or just hoping things will change, I am actually taking action and being proactive in my life. I never realized just how much I was drifting through life and letting fear control me until I went through this very painful experience with oneitis.
I would never wish the experience I went through on my worst enemy, but I honestly must say that now that I am over it and have moved on, it may very well be the most important and influential event that I have encountered in my life. So if you are going through oneitis, just continue to work on improving yourself and do your best to break that emotional attachment you have with the girl. It may take a very long time and it is a constant struggle, but when you conquer it and move on, you will be a much stronger and more capable person.
Deadly_Ripped
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I am wondering though...
If a person develops oneitis, does that then mean it's time to get the fvck away form the girl? If she's doing that to him, then he will always be insecure about their relationship right?
I'm in the midst of oneitis that hasn't revealed itself as LBJF or as the beginning of an LTR yet (I'm basing that statement off of her personality and the events that have transpired so far). This is the first cae of oneitis I've ever experienced and for the first 4 or 5 days it was pleasureable torture which turned into straight up torture. It's toned down a tiny bit but as long as I've got it, she's up on that pedestal and I dont' knwo if I could ever be happy with her.
If a person develops oneitis, does that then mean it's time to get the fvck away form the girl? If she's doing that to him, then he will always be insecure about their relationship right?
I'm in the midst of oneitis that hasn't revealed itself as LBJF or as the beginning of an LTR yet (I'm basing that statement off of her personality and the events that have transpired so far). This is the first cae of oneitis I've ever experienced and for the first 4 or 5 days it was pleasureable torture which turned into straight up torture. It's toned down a tiny bit but as long as I've got it, she's up on that pedestal and I dont' knwo if I could ever be happy with her.
If there is a possibility that she has feelings for you and you want to pursue a relationship with her, then go for it. However, if you do get LJBF'ed or are with her and are totally consumed and emotionally attached to her, then you have to break contact with her. Focus on improving yourself and meeting new people (especially women). Eventually you may be able to be around her again, but until you get over the oneitis it is just going to be constant torture when you are in her presence.
harbourway
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So thats what its called! "Oneitis"... I had a serious case of "oneitis" many years ago. I was 19 and split up with my girlfriend of 2 years (she found out I'd slept with a friend of hers). I was devastated. I went through most of her other friends as well, who threw themselves at me immediately we had split up (I was young and horny so I took full advantage). I slept with girls I picked up in clubs, I had a fantastic 9 month relationship with a wonderful girl who would do anything for me, including some of the dirtiest monkey sex Ive ever had in my life. I had a threesome with 2 gorgeous girls who I met in a club and had missed their train back home, and asked if they could stay at mine "in the front room". But everytime I bumped into "the one" Id go weak and the knees and suck up to her. We even had a couple of one night stands 6-7 years after we had split up, which made the "oneitis" level go right back up. She wasnt even the first girl I'd had, but she had a special way of pulling on my heart strings and twisting me round her little finger. I havent seen her in 10 years and to be honest, couldnt care less, but she still has a special place in my heart, which no one else has managed to do.
Damn this is something I needed to read today. The only difference is that this girl I like(have oneitis for) is a 9.5 in my eyes and I'm pretty sure I'm not the only one who has it bad for her. I've known her for 8 months now, she lives out of town but is in my circle of friends but what really kicked it out of gear is that I'm sure I upset her a week ago with a sexual comment (something about picturing her naked) she thought was pretty bad and ever since then the feeling of panic has set in since she hasn't contacted me since then.
I contacted her today with no response and felt bad about it so what's a man to do? Step back, cool off and do something productive. I think it's natural and healthy to fall for a girl but what actions he takes in lieu of those strong feelings is what makes the big difference.
I was talking to a female friend about it recently and there's a guy that's been after her for years and he writes poems, paints pictures and calls her all the time. For her it hasn't made any difference. I think it's better to hit the gym like I'm doing tonight keeping up with my fitness plan, read an educational book and keep in mind that you'll find a girl or girls to replace this one.
In reality I probably didn't totally blow it with her but thinking that you "blew it" doesn't seem to help. I think if she brings it up I'll convey to her that she has a weak sense of humor because I don't want to have to step on eggshells around a girl. If George Clooney told her the same thing she'd probably laugh and jump into bed with him. Just stay cool, calm down and let yourself know that things will be OK with yourself. Make sure you're set straight instead of worrying or thinking for her. We have a wealth of good information on this site, lots of good resources off the site, multitudes of beautiful women to meet and one day when you're over this girl or with her, you'll look back and laugh at this panicky feeling you got. Oneitis feels like panic to me where as being in love or just very interested is several notches below that. Oneitis feels scary and the urge to call her is HUGE. Right now I feel like calling her to apologize and all that shizzle.
I felt like writing this out because I'm deep in Oneitis today and wanted to pour out some ideas while I'm in it. Reading these posts when you don't have oneitis is much different from when you do. I keep telling myself to move forward to become a more attractive man rather than move forward to chase down this girl. It's better for you in the and all the girls you're going to meet in the long run.
Good luck fellas.
I contacted her today with no response and felt bad about it so what's a man to do? Step back, cool off and do something productive. I think it's natural and healthy to fall for a girl but what actions he takes in lieu of those strong feelings is what makes the big difference.
I was talking to a female friend about it recently and there's a guy that's been after her for years and he writes poems, paints pictures and calls her all the time. For her it hasn't made any difference. I think it's better to hit the gym like I'm doing tonight keeping up with my fitness plan, read an educational book and keep in mind that you'll find a girl or girls to replace this one.
In reality I probably didn't totally blow it with her but thinking that you "blew it" doesn't seem to help. I think if she brings it up I'll convey to her that she has a weak sense of humor because I don't want to have to step on eggshells around a girl. If George Clooney told her the same thing she'd probably laugh and jump into bed with him. Just stay cool, calm down and let yourself know that things will be OK with yourself. Make sure you're set straight instead of worrying or thinking for her. We have a wealth of good information on this site, lots of good resources off the site, multitudes of beautiful women to meet and one day when you're over this girl or with her, you'll look back and laugh at this panicky feeling you got. Oneitis feels like panic to me where as being in love or just very interested is several notches below that. Oneitis feels scary and the urge to call her is HUGE. Right now I feel like calling her to apologize and all that shizzle.
I felt like writing this out because I'm deep in Oneitis today and wanted to pour out some ideas while I'm in it. Reading these posts when you don't have oneitis is much different from when you do. I keep telling myself to move forward to become a more attractive man rather than move forward to chase down this girl. It's better for you in the and all the girls you're going to meet in the long run.
Good luck fellas.
Chicks Just Dig Me
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I am currently suffering from oneitis and let me tell you it sucks bad. I really like this girl, but she hints that she just LTBF. Although she flirts with me everyday, she keeps giving me hope and is truely hurting me mentally. It sucks...she knows she has the power to get to me if she is let down emotionally to make herself fell better. Her flirting is giving me hope and I am truely suffering badly...
I think about who she talks to, what she is doing on the weekends, when will she want to hang out with me, etc...
I only stop thinking about her if I am having so much fun with other women, but she'll come into my thoughts once again. I know I am young, 17, and I still will have more to learn, but this oneitis is a sick disease that no one should suffer...
I think about who she talks to, what she is doing on the weekends, when will she want to hang out with me, etc...
I only stop thinking about her if I am having so much fun with other women, but she'll come into my thoughts once again. I know I am young, 17, and I still will have more to learn, but this oneitis is a sick disease that no one should suffer...
Daniel1099
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bump
great thread
great thread
the_govner
Don Juan
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what is LJBF'ED???
Maxtro
Master Don Juan
What Maxtro recently received from a girl he was heavily interested inthe_govner said:
Let's Just Be Friends (LJBF) is line women give you when they have no sexual interest in you. She may or may not actually be your friend or want to be your friend.
More things she might say are, "I like you as a friend" or "I like you but not in that way," "I don't want to ruin our friendship."
I have received all of the above and more from that girl.