Not 5 years ago...this stuff used to be fun...

[Blue Phoenix]

Isn´t it a double standard? Girls cannot be the prize, only men are the prize. Am I missing something here????

Don´t put them at the pedestal is what I believe in.

 

[Mr.Positive]

By the way Squirrels I made a thread recently which I think is relevant to your post. It basically asked the question 'Would you bother with women if it wasn't for sex?'. Many of the people replying clearly had trouble with reading comprehension and wrote stuff like 'What, I like women 'cos I want to get laid', even though I had specifically excluded anything to do with sex from the question, in fact that was the whole point of the question! But basically nobody really came up with any decent reason to bother with women other than sex. .

Basically, what you are asking is whether it's worth having women as 'just friends'. Yes, and no, to that.

If you are not attracted to her, but enjoy her personality, then yes. If you are attracted to her, no don't bother being 'friends' because if you are attracted to her...you will want sex eventually and you are just wasting your time.

I tried this approach actually. I thought, why not try getting to know a gal first before escalating things physically? One of two things happens, she interprets this as a lack of interest in her resulting in disappointment.

Or...she will tried to lead and escalate things physically herself, and you lose the frame so to speak.

Men are expected to lead, we should lead. So the questions of would we bother with women at all if it weren't for sex all depends upon your attraction for her in the beginning. Don't try to hide your attraction from her, that's the biggest pitfall guys fall into.

 

[mrRuckus]

Hey squirrels

It's been hinted at, but this is what it's called.
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Confirmation_bias

We tend to ignore evidence that goes against what we believe, and then find a way to twist any evidence that we do pay attention to to solidify what we already think. It's pretty much the opposite of the scientific method where you are supposed to be looking for evidence to DISPROVE what you believe again and again.

But yeah, going out thinking "women all suck" just makes you ignore all the evidence of the good parts while the bad parts get exaggerated and become what you concentrate on, so you assume that's all there is.

THis is really the worry about joining websites like this, where everything here could be completely wrong but we'd never know because there are few opposing viewpoints that are given serious consideration. Instead we have a bunch of mostly like-minded dudes just continually confirming what we already believe rather than having someone questioning if what you believe is wrong.

You have.

Getting them smiling and laughing. If you believe all women are horrid wenches with only shallow selfishness on the inside, that's all you'll find.

 

[Oxide]

Hey squirrels

It's been hinted at, but this is what it's called.
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Confirmation_bias

We tend to ignore evidence that goes against what we believe, and then find a way to twist any evidence that we do pay attention to to solidify what we already think. It's pretty much the opposite of the scientific method where you are supposed to be looking for evidence to DISPROVE what you believe again and again.

http://sivers.org/below-average



I wonder what will happen if we believe that every person can teach us something and has their own reasons for being the way they are...

 

[Slickster]

I can't help but wonder what happened to me. How did I become such a woman-hating misogynist?

Hmm...how about 5792 posts worth of time spent on a discussion forum full of woman hating misogynists. Might have something to do with it. Just saying....

How am I supposed to have a CHANCE with "PU" if every time I see an attractive woman, I'm filled with as much disgust and revulsion as I am attraction.

That air-headed, self-centered, "look at how beautiful I am" attitude. That sense of entitlement she exudes just by virtue of being physically good looking. That, "entertain me, jester" way she looks at every guy who speaks to her.

They stand around at bars and parties and act anti-social, not talking to anyone except other "hot girls", or updating their FaceBook pages on their iPhones. And all the guys either sit and drool, or go up and dance like monkeys. I can't help but feel a little sick in my stomach when I'm hanging out with friends somewhere and suddenly their entire WORLD stops when a couple of pretty faces show up on the scene.

The self-centered girls with too much attitude get no attention from me. My friends do just as yours. They stop, stare, and act like morons trying to get attention. This works wonders for me as the girls eventually figure out who is a chump and who is worth talking too.

Girls at bars aren't worth much time. Parties can be the same. Even some single girls who are intelligent and cool will have their attitudes on at events like these. Why bother.

In the last month I've met 5 GREAT women that have made me think "Gee....if I wasn't married....." All 5 of these women have given me good signs of interest. 2 of them have come right out and said so.

I met these women at:
- restaurant - she was the waitress
- B-day party - friend of a friend
- Soccer game I was playing in
- Beach volleyball tournament
- Garden/Nursery - I was buying some plants. We started chatting and she's been to my house to trade some other plants I had.

There are great women everywhere! Don't look at bars and parties you are wasting your time.

The act of talking to women in itself makes me feel like such a tool. I feel as though REAL men would not even give these women the time of day...they've done nothing to deserve it except "looking good".

It used to be that "talking to women" was a fun and rewarding thing...women were more fun and less full of themselves...hell, many of them even had personalities and things going on in their lives.

Can't really help you here. I talk to women all the time. Hot ones, uglies all get the same treatment. I have no agenda whatsoever.

Have they "changed", or have I?

I think its you.

I guess what I'm trying to find is a POSITIVE idea with respect to dealing with the so-called "fairer sex". So tell me...what IS it that you LOVE about talking to/being with women?

I don't find women any more interesting than men, cars, hockey, mountain biking, fishing, etc. I talk to them because they are there.

 

[backbreaker]

i get sick and ****ing tired of people saying "stop trying to meet nice girls at parties bad bars"

people at like smart educated women don't' like to have a drink from time to time or that a girlt hat works at barnes and noble is automatically against going to cut lose at a club.

like that damn slutty ass ***** you saw in blowing the guy in the back of the lub when she thought no one was looking, isn't taking night classes and might have to stop at the book store to go get some books or to study. or the woman that you meet that is piss drunk every night at the bar, didn't promise her mom she would go to church with her on her birthday and you see her in church.

stupidest **** i have ever heard from men,. pigeon holing women like that.


i met one guy braging about how he met all these nice women at his son's little league game.. like *****s are anti little league or some ****. hell that's probably worse because *****s have kids and kids have to have something to do.


rather you like it or not, the 25-40 year old crowd is really the first generation raised by television. ever. yes it's different. it's the first time iever that most kids went to school then went home and had TV and not mom there.

yes there are good women out there and we can get somewhat, snazzy torwards women but you are kidding yourself if you think that it's all us and women are the same as they have always been.

 

[Colossus]

Squirrels-

There are good women just like there are good men. It's easy to get jaded when you spend so much time on male discussion forum with misogynist leanings, spend your social time at bars and parties, and never encounter anything to disprove your bias. Get away from this place. You have all you need to know.

Also, as an aside, living in the city REALLY contributes to your current outlook.

And as another aside, foreign women can truly be a breath of fresh air, but dont think that is the answer to everything. They have different expectations of a man.

Bars and parties aren't really the best for multiple reasons: expectations, egos and face-saving attitudes, alcohol, and lets be honest--you get your share of low-class in many places. It's not like all the best women are at home knitting sweaters; just the environment.

Seriously squirrels, stop reading ALL male forums/literature and start a new chapter in your life.

 

[jophil28]

With age and maturity, a healthy cynicism towards women is normal if you have a brain. Ignorance is not bliss in this case.


Modern relationships are a minefield. We've lost sight of what is important and have tossed out integrity and character and replaced it with self centeredness and ego boosting.

Men and women are equally guilty of distorting the dynamics for a successful relationship.

Men surrendered their leadership when they got hooked on pvssy during the sexual revolution of the 60's. Women realized the power of their pvssy and used it to their advantage to get what they think they want. This is where they developed their sense of entitlement.

Both genders are in a stunted growth pattern and a battle between the sexes has developed. Pvssy is going to the highest bidder. Personally, I think it's over priced.

The age of narcissism has taken over.

The way for a man to avoid falling into the trap is to totally have faith in himself. Putting a woman on a pedestal is a surefire way to surrender any emotional freedom you have. We talk about us being the prize but a lot of it is mostly talk. You have to believe that you are the prize and not just think it. When you firmly believe it, you are a free man.

There are still some good women out there but you won't find them in a bar or at a strip club. When you're sick of chasing pvssy for pvssy's sake you will have to change your parameters of what you're looking for and what you're attracted to.

In my case, I'm now attracted to modest women with good character who knows what it means to be a lady. Now, to the question:


"Are any of you guys still "talking to women"? Or are you all struggling with relationships and drama?"


I still talk and flirt with women all the time. I have a dry and sarcastic sense of humor and use it to bust their balls. I have no fear of what they think because I finally firmly believe that I'm the prize. I realize I'm right by the responses that I get.

I have no tolerance for drama and will not accept any.


Cheers!

THis is the money post in this thread.

 

[Slickster]

i get sick and ****ing tired of people saying "stop trying to meet nice girls at parties bad bars"

people at like smart educated women don't' like to have a drink from time to time or that a girlt hat works at barnes and noble is automatically against going to cut lose at a club.

like that damn slutty ass ***** you saw in blowing the guy in the back of the lub when she thought no one was looking, isn't taking night classes and might have to stop at the book store to go get some books or to study. or the woman that you meet that is piss drunk every night at the bar, didn't promise her mom she would go to church with her on her birthday and you see her in church.

stupidest **** i have ever heard from men,. pigeon holing women like that.

No pigeon holing here backbreaker. I tell people not to look for women at the bars because of the setting. Even the nice women have attitude at the bars sometimes. Maybe it's because all useless dorks vying for their attention. Maybe the women go to these places expecting to be hit on and their defenses are up. Whatever it is the bar setting usually leads to some pretty typical behaviour by both men and women none of which seems to result in anything meaningful. Maybe it's just a tough environment to take anyone seriously.

For every 10 slvts I've met at the bar maybe 1 of those girls I'd actually make a connection with. Now is it because I've met her drunk at the bar where we were both looking to hook up? I tend to think so.

If I met those same 10 chicks at other events I would probably form a totally different opinion. Dumb? Yes!

 

[Zarky]

I can't help but wonder what happened to me. How did I become such a woman-hating misogynist?

You and like every other SOB who posts here. I have come to be bitter and hateful toward the people on these boards because the boards are no longer about picking up women but consist of tons of guys who have repeatedly failed with women and who sit around venting their angsty hatred.

Go home, find a psychiatrist, stop posting here.

 

[Rollo Tomassi]

NEO: "There's no going back now is there?

MORPHEUS: "No. But if you could, would you really want to?"

Was ignorance bliss before you sought out this community? No person both frightens and disgusts me more than one who understands truth, but willfully opts for denial. It's not the desire to do so that disgusts me, I understand the desire, it's that there is no going back. Even if you never read another post or blog and regressed back to your old ways, you'll still make the associations, see the signs of what others have analyzed in your own periphery, in women's and the world's behaviors and motivations, and you'll be reminded of that truth (or at least the uncomfortable push to get at the truth). You will only get what you've gotten if you keep doing what you've done. There is no going back now.

Don't wish it were easier. Wish you were better.

 

[TheHumanist]

NEO: "There's no going back now is there?

MORPHEUS: "No. But if you could, would you really want to?"

Was ignorance bliss before you sought out this community? No person both frightens and disgusts me more than one who understands truth, but willfully opts for denial. It's not the desire to do so that disgusts me, I understand the desire, it's that there is no going back. Even if you never read another post or blog and regressed back to your old ways, you'll still make the associations, see the signs of what others have analyzed in your own periphery, in women's and the world's behaviors and motivations, and you'll be reminded of that truth (or at least the uncomfortable push to get at the truth). You will only get what you've gotten if you keep doing what you've done. There is no going back now.

Don't wish it were easier. Wish you were better.

I just want to ask openly to you for my own reasons and for understanding. What exactly do you mean by that? Accept and live with the feeling of disgust and revulsion as it is truth? The others seems to be saying that he is misunderstanding of the truth and some women act better than the assumption that incites automatic disgust (and one says to look at foreign women and one says he is tired of hearing about it). I'm not quite sure of what you're saying.

 

[The Message Boy]

I hope this discussion continues, because hopefully it can lead to a focus on the current status of this forum as a WHOLE. This forum has gotten away from self-development and turned into self-limitation.

You have two mind conflicting viewpoints on this forum right now and the responses in this thread pinpoint them.

mrRuckus

But yeah, going out thinking "women all suck" just makes you ignore all the evidence of the good parts while the bad parts get exaggerated and become what you concentrate on, so you assume that's all there is.

THis is really the worry about joining websites like this, where everything here could be completely wrong but we'd never know because there are few opposing viewpoints that are given serious consideration.

Amen.

Slickster

Hmm...how about 5792 posts worth of time spent on a discussion forum full of woman hating misogynists. Might have something to do with it. Just saying....

LOL, Amen.

Colossus

There are good women just like there are good men. It's easy to get jaded when you spend so much time on male discussion forum with misogynist leanings, spend your social time at bars and parties, and never encounter anything to disprove your bias. Get away from this place. You have all you need to know.

Seriously squirrels, stop reading ALL male forums/literature and start a new chapter in your life.

Once again, Amen.

Zarky


You and like every other SOB who posts here. I have come to be bitter and hateful toward the people on these boards because the boards are no longer about picking up women but consist of tons of guys who have repeatedly failed with women and who sit around venting their angsty hatred.

Amen.



Now notice these responses:

Rollo

Was ignorance bliss before you sought out this community? No person both frightens and disgusts me more than one who understands truth, but willfully opts for denial.

In a nutshell, it's almost as if Rollo is saying "We here on the bitter Mature Man Forum have scientifically identified the truth and have shared it with you through our b.itchy rants on women and p.ussy-filled scientific threads on how feminism is destroying us! This is the truth! If you do not accept this truth, you are denying reality!"

romangod

With age and maturity, a healthy cynicism towards women is normal if you have a brain. Ignorance is not bliss in this case.

Once again, it appears that there's an assumption from romangod that the information that has been shared by this section of the forum that pinpoints women mostly in a negative light, is indeed, the "truth" and you are stupid if you don't accept it.

The main discussion forum is full of guys that whine about basic s.hit, and clearly show no self-development and growth. They do not focus on improving, they focus on bullsh.it.

The mature man forum is full of guys that whine about women period, and show no signs of self-development other than finding more online articles, situations at a club, or other theories online that support their "views" that women are mostly out to get us and view women in a negative light.

What in the hell happened to this forum?

In the Health and Fitness section, you don't have guys concluding that "my genetics" are the reason I'm fat, sloppy, and obese, so going to the gym/eating right won't do me any good. Instead, you have guys that realize that life is WHAT YOU MAKE IT TO BE.

Here's a reality, NONE of you know EVERY WOMAN. You only know about the women you've encountered and/or studied and I'm willing to bet your "assumptions" on those women are off because, I really don't know how you can "sum up" an individual from a 2 minute approach or from looking at them from across the room.

There is no "truth" on women. Every f.ucking person (woman) is different. Women in Michigan are different then women in California. Women in an upper higher class environment are different then women in an lower class/poverty environment. Most black women are different than alot of white women. Most asian woman are different than white women. Most women with an education are different than those without one. Some women without children are different than women with children.

Do you get the point? How can you sum up an entire f'in gender? You CAN'T, even if you met alot of women in your life, that still doesn't give you enough information to come to serious conclusions about the gender. There's just too many areas to consider!


Conclusion:

I thought the quality posters of the past on Sosuave, concluded, that you SHOULD NOT ANALYZE WOMEN, but instead keep the FOCUS ON YOURSELF (self-development)?

Why are we shifting off of this mindset?

And when a poster like myself questions your theories, instead of telling me to f.uck off and go to Loveshack lol, how about you come out of your "scientific shell" and consider other alternatives to your f.ucked up theories?

Maybe Sosuave will get back to SELF-DEVELOPMENT instead of promoting SELF-LIMITATION. It's the reason why guys seriously focused on self-development don't come around this place anymore, the negativity KILLS your inner game!

 

[backbreaker]

i would not call it bitterness. at all.

all this site has done for me is take the give a ****ness out of the equation and see thought their BS.

10 years ago i would have dated one woman, and tried to screw another and become scared if they found out about each other becuase i thought i was really doing something wrong

now, if i were single, not only would i not give a damn if they found out, i would probably make sure they knew about each other, and when they cry about committment and love and all that good **** look them dead in the eye and tell them to shut the **** up.


they will then call me an *******, go crying to some guy about how much of an ******* i am and how i am a jerk all that good stuff, and he will throw on his KKK white night uni and try to be the saving guy, but in reality, she knows as well as i do thats he is attracted to me.

this site has just opened my eyes. i'm not bitter at all. women are women just like men are men.

because that same guy who would try to save her, she will then turn around and cheat on him anyway, and ask for the same damn traits in a guy that she just left.

this site has just taken the give-a-****ness out of the equation for me. i dont' give a damn. if she doesn't like it okay and there is no way i could be engaged and still keep the woman interested if it were not for this site, becuase i understand WHY she is still interested in me. it's not because i have a little money, that helps, but that doesn't make her still want to have sex as much as we do, it doesn't maintain that spark. what maintains the spark is that i have learned how to keep the frame of the relationship. even now, and i'm more leanant about **** i know i don't' know **** about, but ti's my way or the high way. not just because i'm arrogant, i am, but because when it's my way we both win. when it's your way, we generally both lose.

Just today i was gone all day and i got like 5 back to back calls from her while i was at the track, she had not heard from me all day and when i finally called her back (when i was free) we spent 20 minutes on the phone talking like little teenagers. She still looks forward to seeing me when i get home. i know plenty of women whose hearts sink in their chest when they hear that door unlock. you guys know what i'm talking about.

if i had to say one thing, is that i think alot of guys miss the point about feminism and all that ****. all of that can be cured by just being a ****ing man. cuts right throw the **** like bleach

it's very cut and dry in my house. if my fiancee stopped cooking and became a nasty slob she can pack her **** and go. you can call it shallow, i call it being prudent and getting the best return on my investment.


And good women need good men just like a good man needs a good woman. if you are doing what you are supposed to do in the first place, women will find you.

let me repeat that because that is very important.


And good women need good men just like a good man needs a good woman. if you are doing what you are supposed to do in the first place, women will find you.

you don't have to LOOK for a good woman. women are programmed, trained and thought to sniff out the catches. from ****ing wtih ken dolls to sitting around at sleep overs as teenagers gossiping about boys to doing whatever it is they do in bathrooms when they go to restaurants, this is what they do.

you do not see men who go to the gym 5 days a week and have for a while, who can dress, who are well read, ahve hobbies and business aspirations, sitting at home jacking off because they can't find a woman lol. that's not how the real world works.

a man who has his **** in order will never, ever, EVER have a problem finding a woman.

and if you are having a problem finding a quality women it probably means, your **** probably isn't in order or isn't' as in order as you think it is.

if my fiancee left me tomorrow, just off the top of my head i know of 3 women who i could date tomorrow, just by judging the way they talk to me. one of them is the girl who works at my gym who is still in college and follows me around all the time trying to start conversations, cute little thing, best ass i have ever seen in my life actually. no doubt in my mind if i told her we were separated and asked her to come out i'd be on a date with her that night. the woman at starbucks who blushes every-time i look at her, no problem.

i don't say that to brag i simply say that to say these are woman i 1. have no interest in for obvious reasons and 2. women who i have not approached. both have went out of their way to find out **** about me. the gym girl knows i'm a huge horse racing fan, and makes sure that i have my own TV for me while i'm on the treadmill every morning and asks me about big races when they are coming up.

even moreso, it's a way of keeping the competition up without actually dating someone. i don't' have to go screw someone to remind my significant other that hey, you can be replaced. and the gym girl is a solid, solid 8. we go to the same gym, and she isn't stupid.

and no it's not all just about looks.

I have said it at least 100 times on this forum, stop focusing on women and focus on you. this is twofold because, once you really improve yourself, women will come knocking downt he door.

i remember like yesterday the day i knew i was a catch. i had just dropped 25 pounds, from about 190 to about 167, i had some new clothes on, i had just bought my first real car, the lexus i still drive now, only now it was only like 5 years old, i had just bought my first apartment, just got the keys earlier that day. i had about ag rand in my pocket and i was going to buy me some movies, a fathers day present and some house warming things for my first house.

i had not been on a date let alone anything close to it for 3 years. i had had tried to talk to a few girls with mixed results. i had started seeing some interst in women i was not interested in... you know how it works. you know you are going in the right direction when the fatties are looking. the others will come.

anyway, i go in the mall, and i go in bath and body works (i still shop there btw, love their body spray) and there was this cutie pie working there, and she looked at me and you could just tell she was attracted. hell i could tell and i had not been on a date in 3 years. she grabbed my haand to test loation and just was making up excuses to not let go of my hand. then one of her friends came over and said "what would your boyfriend think about that" and she let go. then i went in dillards and this cute woman was stuttering when talking to me and this older woman practically just threw herself on me and even asked me to go out to her car with her.

then later that night i went to get a drink and this smokin hot girl who i had the biggest crush on in high school followed me around like a lost dog all night and i mustered up the courage to ask for her number and i did not have the words out before she had a pen out. she made it so obvious that she wanted to talk to me. BTW this girl was brilliant, in the same advanced classes as i was, was not only homecoming queen, she had a custom built 67 ford convertible, that she had built with her dad, and was real down to earth, not a guy here would not think she was a solid 8.5. i mean HOT.

then i started collecting friends, being seen in public with women drives women wild.

i got to the point that not only was i not approaching women, if you were approaching me, we were ****ing. if you weren't talking about sex, you are wasting my time because i can call 3-4 women who will ****, right now. and the funny thing is women know this! quality women know this. i learned so much about women and how they think in that time period. you want to bring out the freak in a woman, really bring out the freak in a woman, pin her against another woman and watch what happens. whoever i spent the night with or spent the night with me were so happy to get my time we were having real marathon back breaking sex.. it got to the point for a time i was having trouble getting to work on time because i was not getting enough sleep, seriously. one day i remember i did not even bohter going to sleep i had so much sex.

 

[backbreaker]

A very good microcosm for this place, is the horse track. yes i know but hear me out.

about 95% of the people who go to the track lose money.i would imagine about the 5% of the guys here, are truly successful with women.

of that 95% of guys who lose money, it's funny when you look at them, oh, nothing is wroth with their handicapping ability. they don't see anything wrong with taking a 6/5 shot and the only possible way he can lose is if the jockey stiffed him lol. yes, it's because all the horses are drugged up that is the reason you are losing (and the funny thing in reality they don't' even really care, they care because they can't predict who is and who is not drugged), who do nothing but cry cry cry. that's all they do. cry and cry about this or that.

most would rather blame the horse track or trainers or jockeys than look at their own and and improve their own ability to pick winning horses. most "handicappers" are god awful. i can run cirlces around the vast majority of most and most are more than twice my age. i say that with full confidecce, i know i'm very good, one of the best at what i do, lol, becuase i am constantly taking money from these people.

when you lose a race, look at the race and say okay what did I do wrong, what can I do better. how can I improve myself. it's the same with women. yes there are screwy women, bat**** crazy women out there, all that, just like yes sometimes jockies do stiff hosres, sometimes they give piss poor rides, etc but i can't control that. sometimes (less times than you think) you can't control the outcome of something but usually you can find some fault in your errors.
I have referenced the laws of success here many a times and some of you take it as a joke.

Whatever time I may have to devote to the discovery and exposure of the weaknesses and
faults of others I will devote, more profitably, to the discovery and correction of my own.

that is word for word from the code of ethics in the last chapter in the laws of success (i read the code of ethics every morning when i wake up and i have it memorized)

 

[zekko]

i remember like yesterday the day i knew i was a catch.

I completely agree with you that if you become a man of value the women will come. Being a man of value carries a lot more weight than knowing how to toss out negs. Reading your story though I can't help but notice it sounds like you were being opened by women simply based on your looks.

Which is not a bad thing, don't get me wrong, especially since you worked so hard to get into shape. But I'm just saying.

 

[Warrior74]

backbreaker, hats off. Real talk

 

[Rollo Tomassi]

There comes a point of conflict (or revulsion if you want) after a guy has been unplugged from the Matrix long enough where he begins to doubt himself and what he's seeing go on around him. All of the gender dynamics and the complex, but discreet, interplay between the sexes that's been such a mystery for so long starts to become apparent to him. The Neg Hits he never would've dreamed of attempting in his AFC days become so predictably reliable at sparking interest that it becomes depressing. A backhanded compliment shouldn't work; it goes against everything any girl has ever told him will endear him to a woman, but once he musters up the courage to experiment, he finds that they do.

What's depressing isn't that a well delivered neg could actually generates interest, it's the principle behind the neg - the reason why it works - that prompts the conflict. Are women, generally, more like this than not? So he experiments a little more, and tests other theories, and discovers that with some minor variations, yes, for the most part the principles are valid. This then becomes a real tough pill to swallow, especially when you consider ideas like feminine hypergamy. It's very hard to measure oneself up and adjust to a new understanding of how women operate. He can't reconcile what he'd been told and conditioned to believe before (the soul mate myth, pedestalize her, just be yourself, etc.) with this new paradigm. So either he learns to live with this new understanding, benefit from it and grow into a new role for himself, or he rejects it and vilifies it wholesale.

"Women are really not as bad as these misogynists, these bitter, burned men would all have us believe. They're shallow and soulless to think women are all out to get them. They over-analyze everything when they should all just be themselves and let fate or some divine force pair them up with their soul mates. I pity them, really I do."

I've heard all of these regressive rationales from boys as young as 14 to men as old as 75. It's a comfortable ignorance to believe that things are just unknowable and beyond one's control or efforts to really understand. And to make matters worse, there's a long established system of social conventions ready to reinforce and affirm these rationales; ready to reinsert him back into the Matrix and tell him he's unique and special ("not like other guys") and will be rewarded with female intimacy for rejecting it.

 

[boomerick]

^^^^THIS!


It's hard not to be dissapointed a lot of the time once you see things working over and over again that shouldn't and make absolutley no sense rationally but prove out the subconscience biological drives that truly control human reproduction.

When all the Disney sh!t gets blown away what do you have left?

A lot of bad behaviour and wasted time....

When I see myself getting disapointed and cynical I tell myself that not all women are the same AND that at least now I can see and deal with women where before I bought into the whole "feminine mystique" nonsense and thought that they were just unpredictable and confusing....

Women are very predictable....

But did you truly feel better when you had no clue -vs- seeing the truth and being disapointed much of the time??

 

[Rollo Tomassi]

The Feminine Mystique
Perhaps the single most useful tool women have possessed for centuries is their unknowablity. I made that word up, but it's applicable; women for hundreds of years have cultivated this sense of being unknowable, random, illogical or in worst case, fickle or ambiguous. This is the feminine mystique and it goes hand in hand with the feminine prerogative - a woman always reserves the right to change her mind. While a Man must never be anything less than forthright and resolute - say what you mean, mean what you say - women are rewarded and reinforced for being elusive and dare I say, seemingly irrational. In fact, if done with the right art, it's this elusiveness that makes her more desirable. However, to pull this off she must be (or seem to be) unknowable, and encourage men to believe so (i.e. guy's who think anyone trying to analyze women are "bitter").

On this forum we strive to breakdown confusion and common problems by observing behavior, and we all know that women are human beings with the same basic motivations that men are subject to with some variation in their reasoning and methodologies. The point being that women are every bit as subject to being as mundane as men are, but the difference is that men don't enjoy a masculine mystique. With rare exceptions, we don't generally cultivate this sense of mystery because we're not rewarded for it as women are - and honestly, we haven't needed to. But for a woman, if she can cultivate this mystique, her attentions become a reward unto themselves for the guy who is lucky enough to tame her.

Rest assured, when you think a woman is crazy, she's crazy like a fox; she's crazy with a reason. Women are every bit as calculating as men, in fact more so I'd argue because they have the mystique to hide a multitude of sins behind. They're not irrational, they're calculated - you just have to develop an ability to read a woman's actions and behaviors and see the design behind them. Men who do this will ALWAYS be labeled misogynistic chauvinists by men who don't get it or don't want you to get it. And naturally women don't take kindly to Men overtly pointing out their designs.