NOFAP AUGUUUUUUUUSTTTTTTTT 2017!!!!!

wifehunter

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Day .0001
 

TheMonkeyKing

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I've gone a whole year before and still sucked at socializing, still didn't approach, and had anxiety.
Two things to consider here.....

1. Effects of abstaining really depend on what your habits were like beforehand. If you're a three-times-a-day man, the effects of cutting out that kind of habit will be more pronounced than for a once-a-week man. This has been my experience, going from every day to once a week/fortnight. The physiological and psychological (and social) effects will therefore differ from person to person.

2. As I've heard described elsewhere, the nofap exercise is not a silver bullet for social angst, it will not make you miraculously start approaching and pulling women. We still have to put the work in, in every other respect. By way of comparison.....

-Look at nofap as the energy or fuel you need, like food is for exercise.
-You don't just start eating healthy food and automatically become hench/strong/lean/fit.
-You still need to develop other good habits and lifestyle choices - e.g. regular gym and exercise.
-Repetition and progress to develop strength/stamina, and practice to develop skills and refine good form/technique.

It's a fairly loose metaphor, but it's a pretty simple analogy. If you went for a whole year and saw no massive benefit, it probably isn't a big problem for you.

Ask yourself what else is contributing to your anxiety and fear.
 

ManlyMichael

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When I first came across this I was like what's nofap?

You guys are really still touching yourself? In no way is this good.

Well all been there, but I have that up while still in high school and it only hit me time to time for a few years and soon it just disappeared.

You need to realize your holding in your nut is holding your strength

Haven't you made the connection yet? All these years and you just let your strength slip for nothing? That's idolatry bros, you gotta snap out of it, be disgusted, be ashamed, what have you done in life that makes you think you are worthy to sleep with a woman and have kids? Before this kind of technology it use to be "woman what makes you think you are worthy to sleep next to me" but now the men are being hit hard spiritually. Hold yourself responsible for this disgusting world, because it's the truth.
 

ManlyMichael

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Really though, I want an answer from all of you who do this fap nonsense

What thought entered in you that makes you think you are worthy to sleep with a woman and bring a kid into the world, are you able to provide for yourself for twenty years consistently? You will have to do it for the child
 

You essentially upped your VALUE in her eyes by showing her that, if she wants you, she has to at times do things that you like to do. You are SOMETHING after all. You are NOT FREE. If she wants to hang with you, it's going to cost her something — time, effort, money.

Quote taken from The SoSuave Guide to Women and Dating, which you can read for FREE.

resilient

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day10

Going strong this month. So many things going on socially that's keeping my mind off fap.

Rather than writing in a different thread, I'll post this here. It's a semi FR...

I saw this chick last night that soft-next me last month after a few dates. She's in my main social sphere, which is why I withdrew attention when I didn't see her interest level investment there.

In any case, she sat next to me and touched my shoulder at one point in the dinner conversation with mutual friends.

Another girl from across the table I've seen a few times and not since I bulked up gave me more eye contact than normal. The best part was when we all said good bye from the venue, I got up and left alone and the girl with eye contact followed me out the venue. I walked with her a bit before we got to each other's cars.

I didn't even bother to hug or say goodbye to the former plate.

The ex-plate noticed the other girl follow me out because five-ten minutes later she called me up on my drive home. I didn't pick up and she left a long nervous voice message saying it was good to see me, congratulated me on a recent accomplishment, and asked for a small favor this weekend when I see her again with our social sphere.

I waited an hour until I got home to text her not call her back with a short response "Just got your message, sounds good."

Funny how women don't "up" their interest until they see other women invest in the set. :rolleyes:
 

TheMonkeyKing

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I boiled it down to 3 things.

1. I don't know how to flirt therefore I don't approach
2. Last relationship fvcked me up mentally that I don't feel like I could ever date again
3. Something must of fvcked me up mentally that I just simply can't talk to women.

Today there were 2 girls sitting there chatting at the park while I took my dog out . They were pretty and I was able to say hi and that was it. Don't know how to take it any further

Probably also have confidence issues since everything is stacked against me, also upset about size



As for nofap, I think I'm going to cave in tonight
Dunno man. Sounds like you're in the depressive mindset, which will impact on every aspect of your life, not just women. But you seem to understand that.

Listen to the things you are saying - "low confidence, fcked up mentally, don't know how to flirt / take it further". Probably the only way to change your mindset is to turn your internal monologue on it's head. This means becoming conscious of what you are thinking all the time and to switch from the negative to the positive. This may take years of practice and needs ongoing maintenance. It's all about phrasing.

Long and short, life, and success, comes down to one thing really: enjoyment.

Make a list of pros and cons about your life if it's easier. Cut out the things and people that don't matter, and fill up with those that do. This means, take the focus off of other people and on to yourself for a while. If someone or something doesn't ad value to your existence, it's time to leave it behind.

If you enjoy your life, are comfortable with who you are and have positive energy to share, you basically become attractive by doing nothing (actively).


Regards talking to women, talk to everyone. Take the pressure of expectation off. I talk to everyone when I'm out and about. I spoke to two different strangers on the underground last night, in just one journey - which is almost unheard of, unless people are drunk. I had no motive with these people other than easy conversation. Practice this, and practice flirting with women you like. Failure is not your enemy, it's actually your close ally.
 

resilient

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@Toni,

I recommend two strategies you could try that work/ed for me:

1) Don Juan Bootcamp (PDF) - Will help you tremendously with approach anxiety. Changed my life when I came to this site at 23.
2) Meetup.com (website and app) social events that put you around mutual strangers (that can later become friends, wings, hired guns). After I separated from my ex-spouse fall of 2015, I lost all our mutual friends. No one wanted to pick sides, so they just stopped calling/texting to hang out. I had to start from scratch to rebuild my social spheres. Meetup and church become my refuge from the separation and divorce fallout.

Field Example:
Those two cute girls in the park where you just said "Hi/hello" and continuing to walk on. Try stopping next time and ask a question. Then see where it leads. Watch for body language. You can use that opportunity to work on your posture, charm, c+f. All helpful pickup skills for closing later when you feel more comfortable in the approach. You have to get to a point where you become numb to rejection. That in combination with nofap = Jedi powers.

More recent approach examples in @narcissist thread, 100 sets in 100 days.
 

Bayne05

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I think the root cause of porn addiction for me was sheer laziness. It allows you to sit at home and be a couch potato while seeking sexual gratification through a screen. The problems really start when you get bored watching the same ol' same ol' suck and fukk and you start delving into really bizarre fetishes. It got to a point where I couldn't even get aroused watching regular porn. I had to see the women get abused and degraded for me to get turned on. It's like a drug addict who has to keep escalating his drugs in order to get high because they built up an immunity to it. It is some scary ****.
I agree to this. For me it started when I took interest in gangbang porn. Then the fetishes just keep building up from there.
 

Don't always be the one putting yourself out for her. Don't always be the one putting all the effort and work into the relationship. Let her, and expect her, to treat you as well as you treat her, and to improve the quality of your life.

Quote taken from The SoSuave Guide to Women and Dating, which you can read for FREE.

TheMonkeyKing

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Thank you for the advice and will do better to improve myself. It really helps

I don't consider myself depressed. I fill my mind with positivity throughout the whole day since I know how much thoughts affect humans. I put out welcoming vibes, I engage others when I'm around them. I consider myself to just be a thinker and lost, if you know what I mean. It all comes down to rejection possibly. No friends throughout youth, no one to express myself, always alone so I had the time to think and think and I got stuck in this same pattern. I believe I know what I just don't to break free, but legs don't move, mouth doesn't speak up. Hard to explained but that's the best way I can put it.
No drama man. It's good to get out of your own head. I know what you mean about too much thinking time. I think a lot of people can identify with that. Nothing wrong with it, so long as the internal monologue is on point.
 

John Constantine

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Day 7 of nofap today

Feeling the urge to fap, making dreams and waking up with a painful hard boner everyday, I'm definetely more confident and girls are noticing me more, Starting to get angry for no reason, I hate that thought. Over reacting over simple things today but since no fap I'm able to control my emotions a lot better, It seems to help tremendously to get over my break up.. Don't know why but I,m not thinking about her everysingle minutes since day 4 and when I think about her I'm able to filter these thoughts or rationalize them. I love it and I recommend it to everyone for the purpose of a break up.. I'm hesitating about the hardcore 30 days which implies no sex, no fap for 30 days but damn I feel the urge to bust a nut on a hoe
 

resilient

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...seemed like the value of giving up my abstaining wasn't it worth her.
I know that sounds shallow but its how I felt.
It's called "hard mode" as long as you don't fap, you're still in. Same goes for intercourse. The whole point is not to touch your junk.

day13

Still going well. Like I mentioned in my last post, part of avoiding the struggle to fap is winning the mind game. Staying active in work and social life, accomplishing some goals, self-development, etc.

Last night I hosted a get together at the beach. I had one chica kino me a lot. She asked interesting questions at random times in the night. At one point, I gave her a high five and she kept my hand in the air clasped lingering before giving me my hand back. It was almost weird/uncomfy. :lol: She was eight years my senior. Cougar territory? Anyway, I didn't want to tap that, lol.
 

narcissist

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Day 1. I have to get back on this. I noticed that as I have started chilling with my ex again (open relationship) I have been slipping back into old habits. Not approaching girls as much, jacking off every couple of days, spending lots of money, etc etc.

I have decided to allocate only 1 day a week to her and without the possibility of sleeping over, because that inevitably turns into 2 days. She is only allowed to chill with me for 1 day.
 

resilient

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day3 for me... I relapsed mid-way through the month. I'm finding I'm having a strong beginning of the month each time. When I hit the mid month marker though, I struggle and relapse even while staying busy.
 

skinnyguy

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Had to restart multiple times but I'm in a zone now. Need to stay clean through September cause I'm going to Vegas and need to have lots of energy and positive vibes not to mention a strong libido. My strategy: my home laptop battery is dead and I left the charger at work so I literally cannot watch p0rn at home lol.
 

narcissist

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Day 7.

Going strong.

I sincerely don't want to ever fap again.

I relapsed after 60 days of no fap and I can genuinely say that fapping does nothing good for your life. And no fap is amazing.
 
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