nicksaiz65 Odyssey

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Young OG

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I’ve been reading a lot of Red Pill though, and it’s really hard not to be jaded and angry about a lot of things with women.

I feel like it’s time to raise my standards higher. Of course, until I get my confidence rock solid that’ll be hard to do. This has literally been a lifelong struggle lol
Stop reading red pill stuff. If you already have the understanding of it, that's good enough. It can really mess your head up and make you jaded. It's best to just except the way women are and use what you know about them to your advantage. You should watch some AMS videos on YouTube. But, you can only study so much about game, then you need to get yourself into the field (OLD, day game, night game). The field is where you really learn.

Your standards will raise as you progress. If your banging a 6, it's still better then banging nothing. If your getting laid regularly, you will have more confidence. Women can smell other women on you.
 

nicksaiz65

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Stop reading red pill stuff. If you already have the understanding of it, that's good enough. It can really mess your head up and make you jaded. It's best to just except the way women are and use what you know about them to your advantage. You should watch some AMS videos on YouTube. But, you can only study so much about game, then you need to get yourself into the field (OLD, day game, night game). The field is where you really learn.

Your standards will raise as you progress. If your banging a 6, it's still better then banging nothing. If your getting laid regularly, you will have more confidence. Women can smell other women on you.
Thank you for the feedback bro. I do watch AMS on YouTube, and I think that his videos are great. I plan on taking a risk and fvcking this blond HB that I’ve been meaning to for a while next week. Day game/social circle game is also something that I’ve really been meaning to get into more considering that I’m on a college campus.

I’ve considered some OLD, but I never managed to match with the hot girls that I really want on Tinder. I feel like a ripped shirtless pic could help with that.
 
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nicksaiz65

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Club Envious

Went out to the club with some friends yesterday. I’ve still got a lot of work to do. I’m just not loose and comfortable in that environment yet. Still gotta keep practicing my dancing and learning as much as the music I can from that environment. Until I do, I will literally never ever succeed with some of these club women that I want. I’ve got a looooong way to go in this respect. And there’s a big difference between reading about club game and actually doing it. Because I’m not comfortable, I’m really unable to do approaches there. More dancing and Richard La Ruina could help here. I did smoke hookah for the first time tonight though, so there’s some improvement.

I’m still refining my fade technique. I’ll zero gap my clippers soon, which will help with that. Because I’m cheap, I need a haircut that I can do myself, anytime. And girls actually prefer me with the fade and deep waves on top. It will never look like a puffy Afro. On top of that, there’s another excuse to watch more RSD. Although once again this is more of a confidence issue than a game issue. Honestly it’s probably gonna take forever to be truly confident in myself. I’ve been talking about this for months.

EDIT: Rejected by the blond lmao. Once I get a boost in my confidence and life, I really need to go out and get some new plates. Like a lot of them.
 
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nicksaiz65

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Seeing the World Through a New Lens

I really meant to update this but I honestly haven’t had a chance. I have class soon, so I’ll make this update smaller although a lot has happened.

Cold Approach 15 & 16
I’m really starting to get better. I approached this older milf type in a bar and got her number. I’m working to get her out on a date using my Confident Persistence. This could take a bit, but I’ll keep working towards it.

The other approach was just crazy. I was with a friend just about to grab some Subway and then a HB 9 walks in. I make sure to open her and get her Snapchat. I hope my friend with a stronger game doesn’t get to her first. I really need to reread Dr. Nerdlove’s Texting Book, because I honestly have no idea what to say half the time.


Game Works
It’s so funny how everything on this site is proven true again and again. Every time I have conversations with my friends and I talk about the principles from this website, they agree with me 100% of the time. And today, my friends actually said that we should go to a bar, drink, and work on our game in picking up people. What does that sound like? Lol. Keep in mind that these guys are naturals and have never been exposed to any Seduction material. This seduction stuff literally reminds me of a video game.

Negative Voices Inside my Head
I literally hear voices inside my head feeding me negative thoughts. One of these days, I will knock them out. The solution is probably just doing better in life, honestly.


Not Feeling the Fade... 360 Waves
For all the haters, I finally mastered my hairstyle! Deep waves and a fade. And you know what? I’m not even feeling it, honestly. The fade is fresh for a couple days. And then I just look bummy. So 360 Waves it is. I’ve got to do some research on what haircuts I can do. I’m really trying to save money out here. And I want to be able to look fresh whenever the heck I want!

I realize that curls are more popping these days, but that has never really been me. Plus I love staying on the wave pages. Waves, especially 360s, are smooth and classy to me. Moreso than curls, so I’ll make that my own unique style. Plus waves are timeless. Also, I really do prefer the look of a fade to a taper. So I am going to do a really low drop fade and my 360 waves. So I’m essentially combining the best of both worlds.

Doing Better at School
Still working. I’ve been studying more. But I’ve accidentally overslept class more times than I would like to admit. I’m just gonna go with the flow, and work every second that I have in the day.

Back on NoFap
I’m getting back into the challenge cause it was so dang effective at getting rid of erectile dysfunction. I still have to watch porn though. Now that I’m actually getting laid somewhat, I need to refine my fvcking technique. What does good sex actually look like? How do I do it? As soon as I finish all the Seduction Books on my list, I’m gonna start reading books about learning to fvck right.


Fitness
I am back in the gym and it feels freaking amazing. Honestly, this Master Seducer Stuff isn’t gonna work out for me unless I low key look like a bodybuilder. I’m finally taking the gym lifestyle seriously again, and I love it.

SIDENOTE: Game isn’t a one size fits all, you have to adjust it differently for different people
 
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nicksaiz65

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Quick Musings

I just wanted to update this journal before I get on my homework. I realize that it is very anecdotal and a lot about managing how I feel(inner game) instead of just lots of Cold Hard approaches, but that’s ok!

Approach Idealology
After doing a good amount of approaches and having a conversation with a friend, I’m glad to say that I have completely gotten over my fear of Cold Approach being “creepy.” It’s totally natural. Which means that I am slowly killing the nice guy within.

Hesitation
I thought of a good analogy that will cause me to never hesitate again. “Gaming a girl is like driving. If you stop at a green light, she’Lil think that something is wrong with you, and she’ll never want to drive with you again.”

Academics
I feel 100% overwhelmed. These courses are extremely difficult, and I’m already struggling. But I’m not going to give up. I will pass everything, and have an awesome GPA.


Bald Fade
I was able to have a conversation with a barber for a good 30 minutes. He gave me some tips about maintaining a bald fade that were excellent. I do need a cut that I can maintain whenever. So I’ll take his and y’all advice and do the bald fade with really deep waves. Now I just gotta get the waves deeper.

Upcoming Dates and Plates
I have about 4 different girls that I’m talking to right now. And I have a date confirmed for next Tuesday. Even so, I’ll continue to approach to improve my game, and I’ll keep working on my approaches.

Fleeting Confidence
Looking back to some early posts, my confidence has improved leaps and bounds since I started this journal. But it’s still kind of fleeting, and not all the way there yet. But I need 100% confidence NOW if I’m gonna succeed this semester. So I’m gonna have to do what Dr. Nerdlove recommended and Play a Character/Fake It.

Gym
I am so unbelievably sore. But I’ve been staying consistent with the gym.

SMALL NOTES:
Mark Manson is completely right about the general framework.
Based on my past experiences that I can remember, getting people out on dates works IN GENERAL for EVERYONE. Day life, night life, it really doesn’t matter. Just get it done! I’ve gotten laid this way before as well, even in college. I feel like the actual process of dating isn’t as much of a mystery to me anymore. If you can get them out to a party, do that, and hookup there. But if not, getting them on a date is just fine too! So it’s time to go slay life in general.
 
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nicksaiz65

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Failed Cold Approach at a Bar and More Epiphanies

I’ll really try to keep this one short. I’m just a verbose person, sorry guys.

So there’s this teacher girl at a bar who I’m interested in getting with that I’ve talked to before. Meant to ask her out on a date and get her contact information, but I just didn’t really see a good time to do it. She seemed very occupied. But next time, I’m gonna get her number and take her out 100%.

Idk if it’s because I was drinking, but something inside me snapped today. There’s no reason that I should be any worse than others at game. I’ve said this before, but who cares if I’m fat, out of shape, or don’t have 360 waves yet. They’ll come eventually but I don’t have time to wait on them. I’ll be confident and Game the hell out of people regardless. So like I said before, there goes the confidence issue.
 

nicksaiz65

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Inner Game Before I Hit the Bar

I’m going out clubbing again tonight, and I plan to either meet with a potential plate, or do some approaches, or both. So I wanted to do another personal inner game update before I go out. This will be purely bullet points to combat the last few insecurities that I have. I read lots of psychology and talked to lots of people to get these ideas.

1.) I literally don’t care about being “cool” in the eyes of others, I care about creating value and getting **** done
2.) My archetype is a smooth, cool, sexy, confident, incredibly hard working, sociable, genius nerd/Don Juan. Oddly specific yes, but that’s who I’ve always wanted to be. Embrace being a nerd, and make it work for me.
3.) Fake it till you make it is gonna be critical. True confidence could take over 2 years to build. I simply don’t have that time, I need results NOW.
4.) While I am always nicksaiz65 at my core, playing a character will be my bread and butter. I can “add” these techniques onto my default personality as well.
5.) Who freaking cares if I’m still kind of awkward. I’m awkward in the good way, and that’s just who nicksaiz65 is. I’ll still be able to pull. Plus, who’s gonna call me awkward if I’m a ripped, sharply dressed genius? I’m gonna be me, and still slay as a Don Juan. Although playing a character could still be a really useful tool in my toolbox if needed. I am going to embrace and love my geeky, awkward side.
Just like I did with “talking like a geek.”


See, even just writing this out makes me feel a million times better. My inner game is most definitely getting there. That’s how I know I’m gonna kill it tonight out at the bar.
 
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nicksaiz65

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Hey guys! I have to go study now so I can’t really write an update. But all I’ll say is that I have one of the craziest updates ever coming up. It’s gonna be crazy long, and I learned so much Inner Game by being out in the field that it’s crazy. I’ll type it whenever I get a spot of free time.
 

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Still haven't had time to type out that field report. I'll probably do it sometime this weekend. I'm up studying all night right now and I can't focus.

I'm scheduled to go on a date today.

Four Things I Will Do in my Life From Now On:
Save Money instead of just splurging it. Continuing to be frugal with my fashion especially.
Stop OVERTHINKING everything
Learn to do this 360 wave cut with curved guidelines. Fully spinning honeycombs with a nice drop fade is an amazing look
Stop stressing so much about relationships. A friend of mine told me that it is EASY. You just talk to them. And he's one of the Chaddiest Chads that I know. There's obviously more to it than that, but you get my drift.
 
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Bro you're coming on leaps and bounds from the kid that started this thread 10 months ago.

Also focus on your school work more
 

nicksaiz65

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Bro you're coming on leaps and bounds from the kid that started this thread 10 months ago.

Also focus on your school work more
Thank you bro, that means a lot. Thanks for continuing to read all this time. I feel like honestly I’ve made the most progress in inner game: I’ll talk about that more in this field report I’ve been meaning to do.

And I’m definitely working on that. The biggest problems are that I’m irresponsible and that I’m a procrastinator, plus these classes are hard as hell. I’m already messing up, but at least it’s early in the semester. I think the best thing to do is never let it get to the point where I have to stay up all night, because if I do that, I’ve already lost. I’m terrible at staying up all night. But I’ll do better from now on.
 
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nicksaiz65

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9/17/18: The Great Leveller

So here it is, guys. I've been meaning to make a big numbered post for quite a while. No hookups in this one, but after some revelations and reflections I feel that I've finally mastered my inner game. Which will be very critical once I continue to get my Cold Approach game up there. I'm sorry, but this is gonna be a wall of text. I've had so many thoughts going through my head that this is basically going to be novella.

Coping
Everyone has their own ways of coping with the complexities of life. And honestly, this site along with other PUAs/Red Pillers is a majority of mine. Combine that with my musical career(both classical and as an EDM Musician), I have a complete system for dealing with life. I don't feel lost anymore, I know exactly who I want to be and what I want to do with myself. I realize that I'm always talking about this, but this is a critical concept for me if I'm going to be able to hold frame. I've struggled with stuff like this my whole life, and I'm glad that I've overcome it in the ten months since I've started this journal. Honestly, life is a lot like playing the violin. It's very similar to this Don Juan stuff as well.

Learning Normie Stuff
One thing I can do to help my game and social skills is just learning pop culture stuff in general. From Netflix to current music, it’s all good.

360 Wave Journey
My hair is growing out a pretty decent amount from this fade. It'll be even all over pretty soon. This is important because if I don't have good hair, the girls I like will literally never ever date me. It's a good way to peacock as well, because full 360 Waves are super hard work.
I saw this dude on campus with full 360 waves at a 2 on campus and I was like “damn.” So it’s definitely the move for me. I like mine thick with a fade though. Self cutting is gonna be totally necessary to stay fresh though, even if I’m messing up.

My Own Irresponsibility
I’ll keep things general here. But I’m working really hard on actually being a responsible person. I may have lost a date because of it. If I end up getting that date, I’ll be sure to let you guys know.

Reading
I know it was suggested that I don't read any more. But I'm sorry, this stuff is so fascinating that I just can't stop reading. I learn so much useful info that I feel I am usually able to apply in the field. I at least need to finish the book that I'm reading now, "Game" by Roosh V. Very good book so far, nothing but truths. After this, I'm probably gonna read Sex God Method. If I'm gonna be a Master Don Juan, I absolutely must know how to fvck right.


Double Flakeage
Got flakes on by both the HB9 and my milf. This tells me two things. One, I need to raise my SMV higher so that hot girls will actually notice me. 2, I push too hard too fast a lot of the time. Rejection doesn’t even really faze me anymore though, which is good.

Fashion
I would call my style dressy-casual. I got a new pair of loafers and a new shirt. I got 3 compliments in a day, so I’m gonna start dressing like this from now on, honestly. Getting some Green Chinos and eventually other colors as well. If I’m going to be a Master Don Juan, then I need to dress extremely well.


Fixing my Phone Camera
I need to get my phone fixed ASAP. I need to get a new one tbh. I got way more hoes when I was on Snapchat and showing off how good I looked. So I’m saving up for that.

Computer Screen and Being an EDM Musician
Going to read a book on making music, because I honestly don’t know what I’m doing.

My Social Skills
I might be a weird and kind of awkward person, but honestly it’s just fine. Compared to some of the neckbeards I see on campus, I’m doing great. I’ll be social, but I’m not going to stress about “improving my social skills” anymore.


My Past Failures
I’ve been thinking a lot about my past failures again. So many missed opportunities. The only thing that I can do is turn myself into a man who makes those same mistakes twice! Also, I could stand to be more subtle when I’m talking to girls tbh. Gotta tone down the seduction for a real life setting.


Conclusion
I’ve been reading the start of this journal and I really have made massive improvements. I still have a long way to go, but I’m definitely enjoying the journey. Especially now that I am finally, finally cool with myself. Took me about 10 months but I finally did it!
 
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nicksaiz65

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Morning Thoughts

Just a couple very quick thoughts before I get moving for class this morning.

1.) Remember how I was talking about saving money earlier and actually managing it? Well, I’ve decided that I want to buy a car: I’m crippled without one. If I work really hard, I can find one on the internet for maybe $2,500.
No more buying dumb stuff, only being responsible from now on.

2.) I ended up losing that date because I couldn’t work out the logistics right. High interest level went right to low, and I lost pvssy. Once again, more motivation to be responsible.

3.) Honestly, my flirting, ****y and Funny, and Overall Escalation is just terrible. I definitely need to work on these. The only thing I can think of to do is read lots of examples, and apply what I learned in the field.

4.) I have literally no idea what to do about this one girl I’ve kinda been talking to. I’ll have to figure it out sometime. Although we never take advice from women on dating, it honestly is nice to have a few female platonic friends and get a female perspective on what to do.
 

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Sex Issues

I’ll keep this brief. I just fvcked my Lay Report 3 again and I’m having some major issues with my sex game.

1.) Fumbling around too much getting it in. More practice will solve this.
2.) need to Read Sex God Method and She Comes First, so I actually have some Earthly idea of what I’m doing. Watching porn for technique will help with this as well. Studying Female Anatomy will help too. I’m ***ming too quickly as well, so maybe reading some books will help with that.
3.) Lowkey still have erectile dysfunction. I can get it up now, but as soon as I *** once I’m out. And on top of that, when I do have an erection, it’s kind of weak. I’ve still been doing NoFap. The only other cause is that I’m out of shape. Nutrition, boatloads of cardio, and weights. Once I get my six pack and I can run a half marathon(I wanna be somewhat of a runner) this should make this issue a moot point. I believe Corey Wayne had a video on this as well, I’ll be sure to watch that.
4.) Still need to use a condom even if the girl is on birth control.

The “rambling” thing that Roosh talks about is really working. I see that this is what Chads actually do as well. So now whenever I’m on a date, I will be very comfortable. Still internalizing all this stuff and working on making it natural.

This dude took a girl who I never thought he could get on a movie date. That’s just proof that with game, I can ask out literally whoever I want.

This issue is extremely annoying. I’m glad that I’m getting practice in, but honestly until I resolve these issues, I’m not even interested in having sex. I’m just interested in Self Improving.

Random Thoughts:
Also how would one catch a twerk? I seriously need to look into that.
All my crushes listen to mumble rap... I’ve really got to get on that.
I’ve got to learn the lyrics to ALL these hip hop songs and learn to dance to them
Tbh if I can just get my Lay Report up to 5 before I reach the one year anniversary of this journal, I’d be happy with that!
I’ve got to not only get in shape, but learn to use my body correctly so I don’t look so dang stiff. Agility drills?
 
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nicksaiz65

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9/22/18: Weakness Exposed

This is gonna be kind of a depressing post. But an important one. Long ass post today bois.

Horrible Grades
I got my test grade back today. A ****ing 20. Unbelievable! I studied for this test too. I’m just ****ing up. I’m gonna chug some alchohol and then go hard after this. The 4.0 is dead, but I’ve gotta just go even harder in the library. Getting tutoring ASAP. I hope it’s not too late to turn this around.

Horrible Thoughts
After I got that test back I couldn’t even get out of bed. I felt like such a failure. I wasn’t even gonna share this at first. But honestly, I was considering killing myself. But after sleeping on it, I realized. If I kill myself, I still lose. All those people who said I’d never be a programmer or PUA? I’d be proving them right. I’ve got to go hard and beat all these *******s. If I quit the game, I still lose.

Emotions
One of the things holding me back from being a competent DJ is the fact that I’m entirely too emotional. It’s gonna be all logic, all facts, and going hard from now on.

Not Counting this Cold Approach
On the positive, I did try to do another cold Approach. And well, it was pathetic. I ended up trying to get her number too soon and she wouldn’t give it to me. So I’ve got to build enough rapport, and then get the number on a high point.

I need more technique and practice. I always run out of stuff to say and I never know where I’m going with these approaches. I’ve just been getting lucky. I need to watch infield(RSD, Todd, etc) and do lots of practice. I don’t really know what a good approach looks like either.

One of these days I’m gonna get into daygame. But is that viable on a college campus consistently? Most people tell me it’s social circle game.

Speaking of Daygame, y’all remember that Cold Approach I did at Subway? Where she wouldn’t Snap me back? I ran into her again today. And she initiated a whole conversation, talking about memes and how we met and stuff. So that shows that my daygame is good! I just gotta keep practicing. Dr. Nerdlove’s game in the night, and Richard’s Daygame! I’m gonna keep reading and practicing over time.

My Anger
I’m so mad about my life. I’m done being disrespected in school and life. Done being a beta cuck. Gonna go hard in every aspect of life. My anger is my motivation.

Bullet Points on What to Improve:
I’m really bitter about women. I’ve got to chill on the Red Pill for real but it’s so hard lol. That stuff is so addicting to read even if it is hateful.
Got about 3 girls that I’m working on smashing
My hair is about even again! My fade is almost gone. Soon I’ll be able to get my full 360S.
Getting a new Self Cut System
Got some new Olive Chinos and 2 new pairs of shoes. They are all fresh af.
People were telling me how far I’ve come in terms of my social skills
Gonna start assuming attraction, I’m terrible at finding IOIs
Gonna do 100 approaches like Roosh V recommended
I should smile during approaches but not too too much
Still need rhythm practice
I need to learn old school music and more mumble rap... don’t know it WELL ENOUGH
Need to put dates in my calendar
Getting better at flirting... acting like Richard la Ruina helps
I’m actually getting better at making friends!
 
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nicksaiz65

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Killing my Inner Beta

I’ve been reading the new Alpha Male Strategies book as well. Also good stuff. Just a couple additions to my mindset that I wanted to put in this journal. I got a lot of sleep since my last post: I definitely needed it.

This girl who has a boyfriend has been hitting on me a lot over Snap. Idgaf anymore about that kind of stuff. I’m still gonna smash if given the opportunity, using my Alpha Male Strategies.

Approaching is gonna be secondary to improving my confidence more and SMV. Along with just my normal life in general. Until I raise this significantly, my approaches aren’t doing THAT much, honestly. I’ll just take the pvssy as it comes and I won’t stress about it. I will be getting back on online dating, though.

I will never, EVER give up when it comes to this school stuff. I want to be a God of Computer Science.

Becoming a perfect genius is really taking a lot longer than I thought it would. This really could take a while. As in years. But I’m ok with that. I’ve come this far, right?

SIDENOTE: Using a Tinder Guide, I updated my profile with some of the best pictures of myself that I could find. Already getting matches. Let’s freaking go. Although, before I fvck these girls, I really do need to get a good amount of cardio in.

My hair looks so much better dark, full and thick as I look at these pictures. And this might be weird to say, but if I put in some work I could have the potential to become kind of a “pretty boy” lol
 
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nicksaiz65

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Study Break Update: Pook is a Genius, OLD and Texting

I'm in the midst of studying my ass off. I can't let these bad grades happen ever, ever again. So I'm putting in the work so that I can be great and win at it all. I thought I would update this journal during my break.

I see exactly what Pook means when he says that the material totally changes once you go out into the field. When I reread some portions of old seduction material that I've read through, I'm like 'oh, that makes total sense now!'

I'm already seeing great results on Tinder due to my improved pictures. The matches are just rolling in, and I will fvck some of these girls for sure.
However, I'm seeing some more weaknesses as well. With my text game and holding conversations specifically.

I've seen a lot of advice that tells you to use text exclusively for logistics. However, with every single girl I've fvcked in the past, I've always gone back and forth with them over text at least a little bit. So I'm gonna keep re-reading Dr. Nerdlove's texting book and playing around with that.

My conversation skills are kinda shyt honestly. Finding interesting topics to talk about, and maintaining a conversation are getting kind of difficult as the people that I approach become hotter and hotter. So it's time to go back to the basics. I'll start with the DJ Bible and other basic approach guides on Sosuave. Then I'm gonna go into the videos and all that. Succeed Socially was also a good resource that I used to use back in the day. Just gonna keep feeding this stuff into my brain a little bit at a time until it becomes natural.

But I've got to get back to studying, guys. If my grades aren't at least acceptable, I'm really really really really gonna hate my life. And then it'll be literally impossible to be confident in anything, really.

SIDENOTE: Thinking about this sex practice. The first step is to go hard on the cardio to actually get some bloodflow going. After that I'll read a couple books, and just keep practicing the techniques on my Lay Report 3 until I eventually move onto hotter girls. As AMS says, hot girls only want guys that are able to fvck other girls, anyways.
 
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nicksaiz65

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Focus
I just wanted to post in here again cause I have been POWERING through these lectures tonight. This is the kind of studying that I need to be doing to succeed, honestly. It's not too late for me to get that awesome GPA.

I've already written lots in here about what it takes for me to be responsible and successful. But I'm still going to re-iterate a few points.

First of all, just be on top of your **** in general every second so that you don't have to worry
Write a list of everything you have to do every day and spend the whole day accomplishing that stuff
Be ahead at all times, never behind. If you fall behind, stuff will come up and then it's OVER
Spam a calendar and reminders
Check your e-mail 3 times a day. I have missed out on several opportunities due to neglecting this
Always on your purpose, minimal relaxing
Accept the fact that I'll be tired a lot of the time and up late a decent amount of the time
Plan and schedule literally everything: you won't remember
Just like with violin, start everything literally as early as possible. There is ALWAYS something to do.
Use music to combat laziness
Gav's Guide to Motivation

I turned my phone off while watching these lectures and removed all distractions. It's kind of boring, but I learn the material so much better, and my focus is on point.

Money Management: The only big purchases that I'm going to make are replacing my earrings for some bigger diamond studs, and a Self Cut System 2.0 with Lights. And the Self Cut System will actually help me save money. The earrings are critical to help me look like a Bad Boy. But other than that, no extraneous purchases. And I'll buy a new clothes once every month to keep it frugal yet still fresh.
 
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nicksaiz65

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Sorry guys, I accidentally double posted. What I meant to say is on the next slide.
 
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nicksaiz65

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Being Irresponsible is Damning

On second thought, I’m gonna be buying a lot more new clothes than I thought. Nearly half my wardrobe was stolen in the laundry room. I’m gonna be more careful with my things from now on, and I’m gonna start replacing pieces one thing at a time. Damn, it’s just one thing after the other. At least most of my favorite pieces are still intact. I suppose for Don Juan, fitness and waves are more important anyways. After all, what’s the point in buying lots of new clothes if I’m fat?

I’m sure that with enough time and money, my wardrobe will bounce back soon enough. But that’s literally wasted money. Money that I really should be saving for a car. This isn’t the first time some of my clothes have been stolen, either.

Another example of my irresponsibility is the fact that I have a roommate due to not filling out the application soon enough. This is gonna make it literally twice as hard to close these bytches. Not to mention the havoc that it wreaks upon my grades. Honestly, it’s not even the material, it’s just the responsibility aspect of it all. You could say I’ve been irresponsible with my cardio too.

I honestly think that this is God trying to show me the effects of irresponsibility in my life before it destroys me in the real/professional world.

Irresponsibility is literally destroying everything in my life. But you know what? I won’t let this happen ever again. I have every single one of my countermeasures listed in this journal.

SIDENOTE: I can only think of one way to make sure that I have enough money for a car/summer classes/whatever. Every paycheck that I get, I’ll set aside a bit of it in my savings account, and I won’t touch it. That way, it will add up and I won’t spend all my money by mistake. I’m not gonna give myself too much money for spending. And while I do need things to wear, I’m not really gonna worry about bouncing my wardrobe back until I FINALLY lose this belly fat that I’ve been meaning to lose for a long long time. A Self Cut System 2.0 is more important right now anyways.

Also, I’ll be going out on Thursday to the Hookah Bar or the Club or something like that. After reviewing the material, I’ll do a Cold Approach or two cause I just can’t help myself. Either that or I’ll bring a date. But I don’t know, I’ll make a separate thread on that.

And also, not sleeping all damn day would certainly help with my responsibility.
 
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