Need some help and advice

[Captain Canada]

Shorter term relationships and hookups are more common these days. The younger the woman, the more 'normal' it is.

It's a headscratcher but I know of a lot of beautiful young women who are not in relationships at all. So, in addition to women who won't commit, there are many attractive women who aren't even in relationships. These women bury themselves in schoolwork and/or jobs and then avoid socializing staying at home binge watching netflix.

A lot of women are afraid of men. Add to that, hypergamy where women are looking to date and marry up.

But, there's nothing you can do about all of that. But, on average, women are increasingly likely to view commitment, family and children with fear rather than as their primary life goals.

Now that you mentioned it. This woman once did say she has and image as single successful mom and she can’t change that. I do remember that. Wow crazy changes

 

[Captain Canada]

UPDATE

I got super anxious today and in a moment of depression and weakness I texted her... to my surprise she texted back. We made some small talk about how is work going this and that. She said your workout advice was good and I replied smh and she replied lol

That was that...

So now I juts should leave it be right ?
Not ask to make plans, I guess she knows if I texted her that I am
Still interested no need to do more

 

[Xenom0rph]

It happens to the best of us. The power of the pvssy can pacify even the mightiest of men. The best option is to keep working out and find a new woman.

 

[davidcarr]

UPDATE

I got super anxious today and in a moment of depression and weakness I texted her... to my surprise she texted back. We made some small talk about how is work going this and that. She said your workout advice was good and I replied smh and she replied lol

That was that...

So now I juts should leave it be right ?
Not ask to make plans, I guess she knows if I texted her that I am
Still interested no need to do more

Gym date followed by shower at your place. Or hers.

 

[djdfuser]

UPDATE

I got super anxious today and in a moment of depression and weakness I texted her... to my surprise she texted back.

So now I juts should leave it be right?

Yes. Leave it. You just admitted you acted from a position of weakness, her texting back surprised you and probably cheered you up. You are still reliant on HER to feel good about yourself and you will be back here in a day, a week whatever complaining she's disrespected you again.

Once you've been or even felt disrespected by a woman, you have got to cut her out for your own self respect long term. The better the place you're in, the less rdisrespect you'll take. Let this become your routine and as you gain strength from doing this for each woman who doesn't meet YOUR standards, you'll begin to fvcking love yourself again.

Like was said cleverly back in this thread, it's not about this specific broad, it's about you.

 

[davidcarr]

Yes. Leave it. You just admitted you acted from a position of weakness, her texting back surprised you and probably cheered you up. You are still reliant on HER to feel good about yourself and you will be back here in a day, a week whatever complaining she's disrespected you again.

Once you've been or even felt disrespected by a woman, you have got to cut her out for your own self respect long term. The better the place you're in, the less rdisrespect you'll take. Let this become your routine and as you gain strength from doing this for each woman who doesn't meet YOUR standards, you'll begin to fvcking love yourself again.

Like was said cleverly back in this thread, it's not about this specific broad, it's about you.

She never disrespected him. She withdrew but that's different from disrespect. Not even close actually.

This is what I was talking about. Guys with little to no sexual experience telling you to run away from women at the slightest hiccup, real or even imagined. Don't be that foolish.

 

[djdfuser]

This s is what I was talking about. Guys with little to no sexual experience telling you to run away from women at the slightest hiccup, real or even imagined. Don't be that foolish.

Or plenty enough to realise it's time for OP to walk. Dude's looking at meds, FFS.

 

[princelydeeds]

You can get her back, it's actually pretty simple. If you: profess your undying love, buy her a ring, tell her she's the best thing that ever happened to you, then tell her you can't live without her, then hop on one leg, spin around to the left, then spin to the right, then Do a headstand while screaming " I love you, I love uou, I love you." If that doesn't work, do it in reverse order, while screaming louder, professing your love harder and being more sincere...

If none of that works... Stand up on your own two feet and act like a man. You have an unhealthy relationship with a woman who don't give two ****s about you. The harder you try, the less she cares, life moves on! You need to move on. Cold turkey, get rid of everything that reminds you of that chick, delete her number and delete every text she's ever sent you...

 

[davidcarr]

Or plenty enough to realise it's time for OP to walk. Dude's looking at meds, FFS.

I don't think he ever wrote that.

 

[djdfuser]

You are so right... I did everything that you mentioned ... I think I am in bigger trouble now because I am being referred to a mental clinic and once I can eat food going on anti-depression pills.

I keep going back and thinking about my mistakes I did to ruin this relationship. How did I fall so hard in 2 months. I honestly feel like I am not going to recover.

Ha, you got me double checking now. It was post #46.

 

[davidcarr]

You are so right... I did everything that you mentioned ... I think I am in bigger trouble now because I am being referred to a mental clinic and once I can eat food going on anti-depression pills. I am sub zero and can’t get her out of mind.. I think what happened to me is a result of child abuse and being in a loveless marriage for 15 years.

I literally feel like I am in drug withdrawal right now..

I keep going back and thinking about my mistakes I did to ruin this relationship. How did I fall so hard in 2 months. I honestly feel like I am not going to recover .

OK, this does sound bad. Retract everything I previously said and COMPLETELY move on from this girl.

IMMEDIATELY go out to the hottest bar or club at least once this weekend, dance your ass off and chat up some hotties. Bring a long a wingman for encouragement if possible. DO NOT DRINK TO EXCESS. Keep it casual.

Sign up for speed dating.

 

[Captain Canada]

Yes. Leave it. You just admitted you acted from a position of weakness, her texting back surprised you and probably cheered you up. You are still reliant on HER to feel good about yourself and you will be back here in a day, a week whatever complaining she's disrespected you again.

Once you've been or even felt disrespected by a woman, you have got to cut her out for your own self respect long term. The better the place you're in, the less rdisrespect you'll take. Let this become your routine and as you gain strength from doing this for each woman who doesn't meet YOUR standards, you'll begin to fvcking love yourself again.

Like was said cleverly back in this thread, it's not about this specific broad, it's about you.

Brother you are so right but it’s so hard to do man .

 

[davidcarr]

Brother you are so right but it’s so hard to do man .

I didn't realize the severity of your situation until someone pointed out the relevant post. I am sure however, that you realize that things will indeed get better.

Sometimes a binge watch of the best avengers films and AYCE supreme pizza gets me so narc'ed out I could care less about women. You'll get through this. One slice at a time.

 

[Captain Canada]

Yes he is right about the meds.. maybe after they put me on the meds it will be easier to move past her. It’s not a matter of acting like a man. I wish it was. That I can do... this literally feels like drug withdrawal where happiness is the drug.. (if anyone has done hard drugs and knows about withdrawal)

Right now she has become a symbol of happiness in my life and my brain is obsessing over her. And is constantly thinking of her.. I suppose because her attention brings me happiness? And believe me I am not ussually like this but this relationship has opened up deeper wounds that I need to deal with .

So I am doing that... trying to deal with it...

 

[davidcarr]

Yes he is right about the meds.. maybe after they put me on the meds it will be easier to move past her. It’s not a matter of acting like a man. I wish it was. That I can do... this literally feels like drug withdrawal where happiness is the drug.. (if anyone has done hard drugs and knows about withdrawal)

Right now she has become a symbol of happiness in my life and my brain is obsessing over her. And is constantly thinking of her.. I suppose because her attention brings me happiness? And believe me I am not ussually like this but this relationship has opened up deeper wounds that I need to deal with .

So I am doing that... trying to deal with it...

Question: IF you had free will, and could DECIDE not to obsess over her, what would you be doing right now instead of obsessing?

 

[Captain Canada]

Question: IF you had free will, and could DECIDE not to obsess over her, what would you be doing right now instead of obsessing?

in this order

texting her
watching tv
reading news
reading fitness blogs
checking out dating sites

PS: you are a class act and all the other guys on here too, i never expected this when i signed up

 

[Captain Canada]

Lol, what you are experiencing is common.
Get in the best shape of your life.
Get your money in order.
When 6 months passes, consider dating. Do NOT consider any relationships.

Date for a few years, decide what is best for YOU.

ALWAYS focus on taking care of your physical health, mental health and money.

i was thinking to date now to get my mind off things,, i been chatting to a couple f ladies, i have not met them for a date, but it seems to have helped a little bit

 

[Captain Canada]

Go ahead and date. Don't make it a priority though. You will need at LEAST one year to get your mind right.

**** me,,, that sounds terrible,, one year for my mind to be right? damn,, i really hope not,, are you speaking from experience?

 

[davidcarr]

I had a bad breakup in grad school. It took me almost 6 months to recover.

 

[Captain Canada]

I had a bad breakup in grad school. It took me almost 6 months to recover.

i am torn between if i should go out and try to date or ride the misery through,,, everyone recommends i should just ride this out and rebuild myself