My social circle is dropping like flies

CollegeMan22

Senior Don Juan
Joined
Sep 9, 2021
Messages
255
Reaction score
348
I grew up in a small town in the middle of nowhere. Most dating was very long term, and everyone knew who everyone else was dating. Pretty bad environment imo.

I graduated a few years ago. Recently, I was checking through my old friends’ social media, as well as some people I knew who would be 23-26 right now.

I’ve noticed a really bad trend. A guy (who was good looking and popular) in the day stays with his girlfriend, for 3, 4, 5, or 6 years. Over this time the girl gets fatter and fatter, while the guy still stays in decent, though not perfect, shape. He then “rewards” her by proposing marriage. In some cases I notice the woman ballooning right after marriage.

For example, my high school’s quarterback was with one of the cutest girls in my high school. It is now 8 years later. He still goes to the gym (I saw him), and his girl has gained literally 150 lbs. She looks clinically obese — really bad bros. But guess what? She got rewarded with a ring a week ago!

A hockey player, who’s my good friend, was dating a girl for 4 years. She was nice and slim to start. Over covid she gained 40 lbs. He rewarded her with marriage. She has now gained around 30 lbs more. Her arms are 2.5x bigger then they were in high school.

There are many more cases I could list.

I don’t know if you guys have noticed this in your social circle. These are some of the popular and “cool” guys in my HS. Now they have to stick their c0ck in a whale — if it can even go up. It’s really disgusting to me to be honest.

I don’t think a lot of us were the super popular guy in high school. We probably struggled with girls, which is why we are here. But it looks like we got the revenge in the end. We were forced to learn and not accept what the guys above are accepting. They don’t have the confidence that they can get another woman, so they hang onto severely bloated goods.

We were forced to approach and approach and approach, and get rejected tons of time. Now we have the confidence that we can always find a girl.

The guys above certainly make me thankful that I failed with women and eventually found this community. It’s really sad what these guys are putting up with.
 

SW15

Master Don Juan
Joined
May 31, 2020
Messages
13,531
Reaction score
11,391
I grew up in a small town in the middle of nowhere. Most dating was very long term, and everyone knew who everyone else was dating. Pretty bad environment imo.

Recently, I was checking through my old friends’ social media, as well as some people I knew who would be 23-26 right now.

I’ve noticed a really bad trend. A guy (who was good looking and popular) in the day stays with his girlfriend, for 3, 4, 5, or 6 years. Over this time the girl gets fatter and fatter, while the guy still stays in decent, though not perfect, shape. He then “rewards” her by proposing marriage. In some cases I notice the woman ballooning right after marriage.

I don’t know if you guys have noticed this in your social circle. approach and approach and approach, and get rejected tons of time. Now we have the confidence that we can always find a girl.

The guys above certainly make me thankful that I failed with women and eventually found this community. It’s really sad what these guys are putting up with.
Welcome to your mid-late twenties
I agree that this is normal stuff for mid to late 20s social circles. @CollegeMan22 is seeing this on the earlier side because people in smaller towns tend to settle down earlier if they stay in smaller towns. The smaller town people that relocate to big cities tend to settle down later, but they will eventually follow the blue pill path and settle down.

Last year, I posted about the current state of my social circle in the thread below. It gets worse.

 

Slowhandluke

Master Don Juan
Joined
Mar 7, 2022
Messages
697
Reaction score
727
Age
49
I grew up in a small town in the middle of nowhere. Most dating was very long term, and everyone knew who everyone else was dating. Pretty bad environment imo.

I graduated a few years ago. Recently, I was checking through my old friends’ social media, as well as some people I knew who would be 23-26 right now.

I’ve noticed a really bad trend. A guy (who was good looking and popular) in the day stays with his girlfriend, for 3, 4, 5, or 6 years. Over this time the girl gets fatter and fatter, while the guy still stays in decent, though not perfect, shape. He then “rewards” her by proposing marriage. In some cases I notice the woman ballooning right after marriage.

For example, my high school’s quarterback was with one of the cutest girls in my high school. It is now 8 years later. He still goes to the gym (I saw him), and his girl has gained literally 150 lbs. She looks clinically obese — really bad bros. But guess what? She got rewarded with a ring a week ago!

A hockey player, who’s my good friend, was dating a girl for 4 years. She was nice and slim to start. Over covid she gained 40 lbs. He rewarded her with marriage. She has now gained around 30 lbs more. Her arms are 2.5x bigger then they were in high school.

There are many more cases I could list.

I don’t know if you guys have noticed this in your social circle. These are some of the popular and “cool” guys in my HS. Now they have to stick their c0ck in a whale — if it can even go up. It’s really disgusting to me to be honest.

I don’t think a lot of us were the super popular guy in high school. We probably struggled with girls, which is why we are here. But it looks like we got the revenge in the end. We were forced to learn and not accept what the guys above are accepting. They don’t have the confidence that they can get another woman, so they hang onto severely bloated goods.

We were forced to approach and approach and approach, and get rejected tons of time. Now we have the confidence that we can always find a girl.

The guys above certainly make me thankful that I failed with women and eventually found this community. It’s really sad what these guys are putting up with.

Why is it really sad that guys are putting up with that? It's like wife goggles. Guys tend to stick with girls who have been there with them from the very beginning. There will be edge cases, but guys are loyal. Heck Ghengis khan had multiple "wives" and had sex with thousand of women, but the one that was most important to him was the one that he met when he was just a poor, starving teenage nomad.

Women are fickle. Lose your job or your muscle or your etc.. etc.. and she leaves because the "sparks" aren't there anymore... Even if a woman gets fat, guys have a tendency to be loyal. Hell, all women will hit the wall sooner or later. Facts of life. Look at pierce bronsman's wife. To be honest, this is one of the things I like about guys.. For the most part, there are a lot of guys who are loyal to a fault.
 

Ricky

Master Don Juan
Joined
Mar 9, 2002
Messages
4,094
Reaction score
835
Age
50
Its not ideal but at least these guys SMV is higher than their wives.

My wife was hot as hell at 27. Now she is 44. We only had one kid, she has managed to workout and stay fit but her diet and sleep habits have been poor

we have been having alot of issues but at least i can say my SMV has eclipsed hers now
 

RazorRambo24

Banned
Joined
Dec 30, 2022
Messages
1,201
Reaction score
1,378
Age
32
I'm sure you're a good dude but trying to **** on others for having someone who they found worthy enough to stick by their side and be a good partner and asset to them just because the woman got fat is quite pathetic.

While I've never even f-ed a fat chick, I wouldn't demean someone for staying with a woman just because she got fat. I mean I don't get how that even relates with the title of the post. Are you just upset these guys are no longer your friends and just want to shi.t on their relationship?

Do you have any women who have stuck by your side till this day? if not, I mean what are we talking about here? JUst take a good look in the mirror.. the only person you should prob be sh.itting on is yourself.. and then maybe you can get the balls to level up and stop living a mediocre life with a sh.t social experience
 

sangheilios

Master Don Juan
Joined
Sep 25, 2018
Messages
2,687
Reaction score
2,806
Age
34
I'm sure you're a good dude but trying to **** on others for having someone who they found worthy enough to stick by their side and be a good partner and asset to them just because the woman got fat is quite pathetic.

While I've never even f-ed a fat chick, I wouldn't demean someone for staying with a woman just because she got fat. I mean I don't get how that even relates with the title of the post. Are you just upset these guys are no longer your friends and just want to shi.t on their relationship?

Do you have any women who have stuck by your side till this day? if not, I mean what are we talking about here? JUst take a good look in the mirror.. the only person you should prob be sh.itting on is yourself.. and then maybe you can get the balls to level up and stop living a mediocre life with a sh.t social experience
I honestly agree with this. I think it's important for men to figure out what they are really looking for with their interactions with women. It's normal for men to want to go for women they find attractive, hot, etc. However, I also believe that as men get older their start to priorities of what they are looking for may evolve over time. If a man is looking for a woman who is possibly marriage material that he has kids with this is going to look completely different than if he is just looking for a sex toy lol. Something that I think is especially the case today is many women that are quite attractive are honestly very high maintenance and not good relationship material, let along marriage material. You'd also want to avoid the party girls or those who are very sexually open and free, again these women are something you sleep with or have for casual short term flings, not relationship material.

With that said, I understand what the OP is getting at. When these relationships developed the male and female were roughly on the same level. However, with time things can change and something that can happen quite often is one person in the relationship becomes complacent. They'll start seeing less reason to put in effort, which also includes appearance, etc. I think if the man in the relationship took care of himself and was decently fit but his wife/long term woman let herself go I believe that this could cause some issues. Again, it would really come down to what this man places his priorities on. A big factor though is if he is still attracted to her or not.
 

RazorRambo24

Banned
Joined
Dec 30, 2022
Messages
1,201
Reaction score
1,378
Age
32
I honestly agree with this. I think it's important for men to figure out what they are really looking for with their interactions with women. It's normal for men to want to go for women they find attractive, hot, etc. However, I also believe that as men get older their start to priorities of what they are looking for may evolve over time. If a man is looking for a woman who is possibly marriage material that he has kids with this is going to look completely different than if he is just looking for a sex toy lol. Something that I think is especially the case today is many women that are quite attractive are honestly very high maintenance and not good relationship material, let along marriage material. You'd also want to avoid the party girls or those who are very sexually open and free, again these women are something you sleep with or have for casual short term flings, not relationship material.

With that said, I understand what the OP is getting at. When these relationships developed the male and female were roughly on the same level. However, with time things can change and something that can happen quite often is one person in the relationship becomes complacent. They'll start seeing less reason to put in effort, which also includes appearance, etc. I think if the man in the relationship took care of himself and was decently fit but his wife/long term woman let herself go I believe that this could cause some issues. Again, it would really come down to what this man places his priorities on. A big factor though is if he is still attracted to her or not.
Well its safe to say if the guy is proposing to the woman after she already gained the weight, she must be a great asset to his life and a good partner like I mentioned.

I think its all fun and cool to make fun of whales and dudes who fucc fat chicks.. but when it comes to more serious relationships and people finding love with partners who then later go on to gain some weight, it just comes off as super childish to go and talk sh.t about them.. especially when the title of the post is "my social circle is dropping like flies". It's almost like the OP just wants to hate on people who actually settled down and are happy in life that are possibly no longer his friends or w.e
 

sangheilios

Master Don Juan
Joined
Sep 25, 2018
Messages
2,687
Reaction score
2,806
Age
34
Well its safe to say if the guy is proposing to the woman after she already gained the weight, she must be a great asset to his life and a good partner like I mentioned.

I think its all fun and cool to make fun of whales and dudes who fucc fat chicks.. but when it comes to more serious relationships and people finding love with partners who then later go on to gain some weight, it just comes off as super childish to go and talk sh.t about them.. especially when the title of the post is "my social circle is dropping like flies". It's almost like the OP just wants to hate on people who actually settled down and are happy in life that are possibly no longer his friends or w.e
At the end of the day, the majority of people that are in relationships, marriage, etc. more or less "settled" for one another. I think deep down many people wish there were things they could change about their bf or gf, or perhaps get something a little better, etc. I don't think this is the case for every single relationship out there but it's something to consider. I especially feel that this is an issue for young men today, as many are legitimately struggling in the dating market and may have to put much more work compared to their fathers and grandfathers for women that are overall of lower quality on average.

Side note, many relationships and marriages you see are not actually happy and fulfilling, they just pretend to be that way.
 

You essentially upped your VALUE in her eyes by showing her that, if she wants you, she has to at times do things that you like to do. You are SOMETHING after all. You are NOT FREE. If she wants to hang with you, it's going to cost her something — time, effort, money.

Quote taken from The SoSuave Guide to Women and Dating, which you can read for FREE.

M

member160292

Guest
For a guy ‘in college’ and ‘19 years old’ according to his profile. You come across with much more experience than that. By experience, I mean you expose a lot of anti-women ideologies. Not healthy.

I really hope you are a troll, because if not….society has another problem on their hands. It’s an Incelpocalypse
 

CollegeMan22

Senior Don Juan
Joined
Sep 9, 2021
Messages
255
Reaction score
348
Women are fickle. Lose your job or your muscle or your etc.. etc.. and she leaves because the "sparks" aren't there anymore...
If women have standards for us, why cannot we have standards for them?
Even if a woman gets fat, guys have a tendency to be loyal. Hell, all women will hit the wall sooner or later. Facts of life. Look at pierce bronsman's wife. To be honest, this is one of the things I like about guys..
This is white knight talk. I have found that women treat me much better (and may even be more attracted to me) when I have standards for them. I’m talking physical AND behavioral standards .
 

CollegeMan22

Senior Don Juan
Joined
Sep 9, 2021
Messages
255
Reaction score
348
My wife was hot as hell at 27. Now she is 44. We only had one kid, she has managed to workout and stay fit but her diet and sleep habits have been poor
This is great. Obviously we will all degenerate as we get older, but we don’t have to become unhealthy. I’m not saying I want young women forever. But if I am going to work hard to stay healthy and strong, I want my woman to work hard to stay fit as well.
 

CollegeMan22

Senior Don Juan
Joined
Sep 9, 2021
Messages
255
Reaction score
348
I mean I don't get how that even relates with the title of the post. Are you just upset these guys are no longer your friends and just want to shi.t on their relationship?
The title of the post was probably mischosen. I am still friends with all of these guys, and don’t make any derogatory comments towards their decisions whatsoever. They are all fully blue pilled. I meant to say that their potential to get cute HBs is now lost, due to their decision to marry and propose, which I see as a misguided decision. I see it as misguided because it was made under the Feminine Imperative of “weight doesn’t matter”, “true love”, and “serve women”.

But from our perspective, as you know, men’s SMV increases until your late 20s and early 30s. It seems like a bad decision to stay with a woman who does not even respect herself (as shown by her actions and lack of self-control), when you have so much potential to get a woman who does.
 
Last edited:

CollegeMan22

Senior Don Juan
Joined
Sep 9, 2021
Messages
255
Reaction score
348
When these relationships developed the male and female were roughly on the same level. However, with time things can change and something that can happen quite often is one person in the relationship becomes complacent. They'll start seeing less reason to put in effort, which also includes appearance, etc. I think if the man in the relationship took care of himself and was decently fit but his wife/long term woman let herself go I believe that this could cause some issues. Again, it would really come down to what this man places his priorities on. A big factor though is if he is still attracted to her or not.
Well its safe to say if the guy is proposing to the woman after she already gained the weight, she must be a great asset to his life and a good partner like I mentioned.
It is hard for me to put myself in the shoes of a blue pilled guy. Just think, this guy has been taught to serve and appease women his whole life. That is moral. That is what is right. He has to make her happy. He must spend “time” with her just to talk about random things.

But with this obligation, many feel a sort of pleasure. A pleasure in serving Woman. Which then breeds infatuation, as we can see in the many desperate blue pilled guys.

The above is what I thought about when writing this post. I don’t believe in Disney fairy tales, of “love for ever after”. I mean, just look at most parents to show the falsity of the Disney fairytale.

I would certainly consider marrying a woman who I am attracted to and who sticks by my side. But I need to be attracted to her! It is not my duty to stay with her, no matter how her shape and form changes. That is my basic point.
 

CollegeMan22

Senior Don Juan
Joined
Sep 9, 2021
Messages
255
Reaction score
348
I think deep down many people wish there were things they could change about their bf or gf, or perhaps get something a little better, etc. I don't think this is the case for every single relationship out there but it's something to consider. I especially feel that this is an issue for young men today, as many are legitimately struggling in the dating market and may have to put much more work compared to their fathers and grandfathers for women that are overall of lower quality on average.

Side note, many relationships and marriages you see are not actually happy and fulfilling, they just pretend to be that way.
Yessir, thank you for these points. Many men WANT their woman to change, or even get a new woman. I mean before marriage. But they are too scared to (a) verbalize it and (b) that they will lose “The One” forever. Thus they do not act and do not get the women that their potential deserves.
 

CollegeMan22

Senior Don Juan
Joined
Sep 9, 2021
Messages
255
Reaction score
348
For a guy ‘in college’ and ‘19 years old’ according to his profile. You come across with much more experience than that. By experience, I mean you expose a lot of anti-women ideologies. Not healthy.
Infatuation with women breeds failure. Women are a positive good, but are not the essence of my life. I refuse to let them take the place of my goals and mission. When I do this, they seem to like me more.

What a surprise.
 

AureliusMaximus

Master Don Juan
Joined
Mar 30, 2019
Messages
2,792
Reaction score
2,660
Location
Denmark
I grew up in a small town in the middle of nowhere. Most dating was very long term, and everyone knew who everyone else was dating. Pretty bad environment imo.

I graduated a few years ago. Recently, I was checking through my old friends’ social media, as well as some people I knew who would be 23-26 right now.

I’ve noticed a really bad trend. A guy (who was good looking and popular) in the day stays with his girlfriend, for 3, 4, 5, or 6 years. Over this time the girl gets fatter and fatter, while the guy still stays in decent, though not perfect, shape. He then “rewards” her by proposing marriage. In some cases I notice the woman ballooning right after marriage.

For example, my high school’s quarterback was with one of the cutest girls in my high school. It is now 8 years later. He still goes to the gym (I saw him), and his girl has gained literally 150 lbs. She looks clinically obese — really bad bros. But guess what? She got rewarded with a ring a week ago!

A hockey player, who’s my good friend, was dating a girl for 4 years. She was nice and slim to start. Over covid she gained 40 lbs. He rewarded her with marriage. She has now gained around 30 lbs more. Her arms are 2.5x bigger then they were in high school.

There are many more cases I could list.

I don’t know if you guys have noticed this in your social circle. These are some of the popular and “cool” guys in my HS. Now they have to stick their c0ck in a whale — if it can even go up. It’s really disgusting to me to be honest.

I don’t think a lot of us were the super popular guy in high school. We probably struggled with girls, which is why we are here. But it looks like we got the revenge in the end. We were forced to learn and not accept what the guys above are accepting. They don’t have the confidence that they can get another woman, so they hang onto severely bloated goods.

We were forced to approach and approach and approach, and get rejected tons of time. Now we have the confidence that we can always find a girl.

The guys above certainly make me thankful that I failed with women and eventually found this community. It’s really sad what these guys are putting up with.
Learn from it; do not make the same mistakes.
 

sangheilios

Master Don Juan
Joined
Sep 25, 2018
Messages
2,687
Reaction score
2,806
Age
34
For a guy ‘in college’ and ‘19 years old’ according to his profile. You come across with much more experience than that. By experience, I mean you expose a lot of anti-women ideologies. Not healthy.

I really hope you are a troll, because if not….society has another problem on their hands. It’s an Incelpocalypse
I've been posting about this on here quite a bit recently, but this is becoming a very common trend with young men in our society. No one on here took it seriously when I posted the stat that showed 2/3 of young men are single vs. 1/3 of women, something that even reached the mainstream media.

This is a combination of multiple variables and is quite complex but it's something that started with social media and particularly dating apps, which came on the scene almost 10 years ago. For a 19 year old this has been the reality of the dating market for literally his entire life since he has hit puberty.
 

What happens, IN HER MIND, is that she comes to see you as WORTHLESS simply because she hasn't had to INVEST anything in you in order to get you or to keep you.

You were an interesting diversion while she had nothing else to do. But now that someone a little more valuable has come along, someone who expects her to treat him very well, she'll have no problem at all dropping you or demoting you to lowly "friendship" status.

Quote taken from The SoSuave Guide to Women and Dating, which you can read for FREE.

Top