My girlfriend chose Facebook over me.

vatoloco

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The problem with a lot of these girls (especially if they're HB8+) is that they're so used to the attention that they get (not only IRL but now online via social networking) that unless their IL is very high in you, she will be more interested in the attention that they additionally get online. You will not be able to compete with the legions of orbiters and FZed dudes who tell her hot "hot" and "beautiful" she is on her Facebook pictures.

Personally, if I have to give any girl an ultimatum (not that I would), it'd mean that she's no longer "mine" and I might as well drop her (or have her drop me) as the relationship dynamics will no longer be good.

On the upside, you are getting more and more red flags and this facebook thingy might have been a good thing for you to realize that this girl is not a good one.

If she cheated on you, she is no good for a LTR. These types of disloyal women are only good for ONS or FB interactions.

Nothing more.
 

Nutz

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PrettyBoyAJ said:
Me and my girlfriend got in a huge argument because I have a problem with her being on facebook. We've argued over this on numerous occasions but today was the day I put my foot down.

BTW me and my girlfriend have been going out for 2 years now. We live together and go to the same college (This is the last semester until we go to seperate universities to try a LDR for a couple months).

A couple months ago (December), me and my girlfriend decided that we were going to delete our facebooks together because multiple times in the relationship I have gotten upset at things that were on her facebook and once she got mad at me for something because of another girl posting on my wall.

After this discussion she says she will delete it soon....... I then delete my facebook later on in the week and she still hasn't deleted it. A couple days later we get into an argument about it then then I finally give in and say she can keep it for some dumb reason.

Weeks later we get into another argument over facebook and I tell her the discomfort I'm having over her being on facebook. She still refuses to deactivate it and say that it's pointless to deactivate it because she doesn't see a problem.

Then today I finally decided to put my footdown on it because I don't like the fact that she still goes on facebook even though she knows that I am very uncomfortable with it and I also think that by not having int will help our relationship. She then says she's not deleting it. So I tell her that I'd rather find a girl who is interested in how I feel about things. Then she just said ok.

She says that she has tryed to improve for me because she doesn't get on facebook when I am not around. She says that if it is out of sight it is out of mind.

After hours of argument we came up to the compromise that she would deactivate her account until May. I find this real funny how I feel like at the end of the day she will get everything she want. When it comes to small things and when it comes to big things. In the argument she told me "My problems are my problems, I will fix them by myself and I don't need you to help me fix them". I am thinking to myself that I don't think any girl in any relationship would think like that. Only a man with a lot of pride.

EDIT:In the argument she also said that I was not the person she fell in love with. The person she fell in love with was the person who was out all the time trying to be social. and now I'm not that person. I really do not want a friend unless it benefits me somehow because naturally I really do just like to be alone. I'm more focused on school work and getting business accomplished rather then smoking weed and hanging with guys most of the day.
What a coincidence....

http://solomongroup.wordpress.com/2011/02/28/social-media-girls/
 

Vice

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PrettyBoyAJ said:
A couple months ago (December), me and my girlfriend decided that we were going to delete our facebooks together because multiple times in the relationship I have gotten upset at things that were on her facebook and once she got mad at me for something because of another girl posting on my wall.

After this discussion she says she will delete it soon....... I then delete my facebook later on in the week and she still hasn't deleted it. A couple days later we get into an argument about it then then I finally give in and say she can keep it for some dumb reason.

Weeks later we get into another argument over facebook and I tell her the discomfort I'm having over her being on facebook. She still refuses to deactivate it and say that it's pointless to deactivate it because she doesn't see a problem.

Then today I finally decided to put my footdown on it because I don't like the fact that she still goes on facebook even though she knows that I am very uncomfortable with it and I also think that by not having int will help our relationship. She then says she's not deleting it. So I tell her that I'd rather find a girl who is interested in how I feel about things. Then she just said ok.

She says that she has tryed to improve for me because she doesn't get on facebook when I am not around. She says that if it is out of sight it is out of mind.

After hours of argument we came up to the compromise that she would deactivate her account until May. I find this real funny how I feel like at the end of the day she will get everything she want. When it comes to small things and when it comes to big things. In the argument she told me "My problems are my problems, I will fix them by myself and I don't need you to help me fix them". I am thinking to myself that I don't think any girl in any relationship would think like that. Only a man with a lot of pride.

EDIT:In the argument she also said that I was not the person she fell in love with. The person she fell in love with was the person who was out all the time trying to be social. and now I'm not that person. I really do not want a friend unless it benefits me somehow because naturally I really do just like to be alone. I'm more focused on school work and getting business accomplished rather then smoking weed and hanging with guys most of the day.
First off, congradulations on realizing how much productivity Facebook drains from your life.

But...

Holy SH*T you are INSECURE! You two sound like a pair of high schoolers going at it, without even knowing how to "go at it".

Who CARES what kind of sh*t guys post on her wall? That's the stuff you can SEE. What kind of messages do you think she gets from guys, away from public? You can't control what they write, and she can't control what they post.

You're trying to CONTROL your girlfriend, and limit her social contact with people. That's CREEPY and INSECURE.

And who gives a flying SH*T about your f*cking FEELINGS about something as trivial as Facebook, dude?

And you're dwelling on "love"... what the f*ck? This sounds like a high school soap opera.

Get your **** together; you're the problem, not her. If she's on Facebook when you're around, you're not interesting to her. If she's F*CKING CHEATED ON YOU, THAT'S YOUR FAULT. Would a woman who is dating a MAN who gives her great sex and is secure with himself ever DARE to cheat on him?
 

horaholic

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EDIT:In the argument she also said that I was not the person she fell in love with. The person she fell in love with was the person who was out all the time trying to be social. and now I'm not that person. I really do not want a friend unless it benefits me somehow because naturally I really do just like to be alone. I'm more focused on school work and getting business accomplished rather then smoking weed and hanging with guys most of the day.
This statement right here is where your ENTIRE problem lies. Chicks lose respect for guys who stop hanging with their friends. I've been there, done that. You HAVE to have a social life in an ltr, or she will be so bored with you she will start fights, cheat, and or dump your ass. This is one of the ONLY things you should EVER believe coming from a womans mouth.

That being said, the damage is done, and she cheated on you, and has no respect for you (not that I blame her). MOVE THE FVCK ON WITH YOUR LIFE, without this chick.
 

Thundernuts

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horaholic said:
This statement right here is where your ENTIRE problem lies. Chicks lose respect for guys who stop hanging with their friends. I've been there, done that. You HAVE to have a social life in an ltr, or she will be so bored with you she will start fights, cheat, and or dump your ass. This is one of the ONLY things you should EVER believe coming from a womans mouth.

That being said, the damage is done, and she cheated on you, and has no respect for you (not that I blame her). MOVE THE FVCK ON WITH YOUR LIFE, without this chick.
While i don't personally get the feeling she is cheating on you, it is a problem. I've heard this a couple times from women and usually its true, i change somehow and usually its counter-productive. Women want a man they can brag about, not a loner. I don't have alot of friends, but the people i do call friends are people i drink with, people i would fight for, people that consider me a brother. You need a few friends to shoot the sh!t with.

And the reason she is on facebook is because women want attention, they will try and get it through whatever means they can, if you had to be a woman in order to join facebook, i garentee it would be just as popular because it provides a way for women to boast about themselves. Just like shoes.

Good luck man.
 

r0cky

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Observe where your impulse to control her comes from. This is all about your ego. Once you're able to control your ego you will be able to see the right way to deal with her. In a way that makes her WANT to do it. Forcing people to do something will only comeback to bite you in some other way.
 

DJDamage

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f283000 said:
You know a sign that men in general are in bad shape? When they have facebook drama!

What has this world come to???? This thread is truly a sign of the end if I ever saw one.

Forget all the other AFC stuff going on with men. This is reaching new low levels.
+1

OP is fvcking up his relationship on his own.
 

backbreaker

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PrettyBoyAJ said:
Well I guess the reason of my insecurity was that almost a year ago she cheated on me. She also did some very messed up things (Such as choosing her own friends over me). Things have changed drastically since especially since we moved in together.(I really never manned up. I basically just begged her to stop doing that messed up stuff and then over time she stopped) Now, we basically both don't really have friends that we hang out at the University. I guess this is my problem.

I've even tryed therapy but somehow what happened over a year ago always comes up to my mind for some reason.

But I do understand that I am pushing it. However, you would think that your "future wife" will make that sacrifice if it meant so much to someone.
whatthefvckoverload.gif
 

shizz702

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lol the damage facebook is doing and has done to people, incredible.
 

lordtwiggie

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OP,

Wake up!
She cheated on you before and you are willing to stomach that???
And she made you both agree to some crap but she decides to keep her end open...how sure are you she ain't cheating on your right now?
yes she gets everything she wants and you continuously keep giving her....she has twirled around her fingers.
either take the advice here (leave her) or go back to sucking her toes

sorry if I sounded harsh, but it's for your goods
 

The Duke

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I see some issues with this girl. A compromise I'd throw out there is is have a joint facebook account with both your names and you both have the password.

I'm totally against faKebook btw. One thing about it, if she's going to cheat on you you'll figure it out sooner or later. Keeping her off faKebook isn't going to keep her from f'ing some other guy.
 

ProDJ26

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Women are always gonna do what they wanna do...
 

loveshogun

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Situations where Love Shogun would forgive a woman for cheating on him:

1) She saved his entire extended family from a burning building.
2) She gave him 1 billion dollars, no questions asked, and never mentioned it again
3) She single-handedly repelled an alien invasion of Earth.

Let's remember that I'm also a really naturally forgiving person. So yeah, I'd forgive her. I'd leave, too, but you know, forgiveness is easy. Forgive, forget, and find another woman.
 

PrettyBoyAJ

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Yes, I definately have some resentment TOWARDS MYSELF for letting that sh!t go down and not breaking up with her for good.

I feel like I'm making strides towards moving away from being an AFC though. I'm still trying to learn more though.
 

Zarky

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I think the OP showed big-time insecurity by bringing up Facebook stuff. If your girl wants to be on facebook, then deal with it. All the girls I'm currently dating are on it, and all of them flirt and gossip etc etc on it. I don't give a sh!t.

I have a feeling the OP is under the age of 21. These insecurities will work themselves out with age (usually, hopefully).

Your g/f dumped you (and yes, she dumped you) because this was probably one of many ways you showed neediness and insecurity toward her.
 

PrettyBoyAJ

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We're still together. I didn't get dumped.
 

Masculinity

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Phuck your now ex-gf. Move the heck on and don't pay attention to the lurking details. You are on this site to move FORWARD, just like Toyota. Ever heard their commercials? They say move forward not "complain about the gas-pedal-gets-stuck problem. It hurts like hell; I know that from experience, but just get back up and move right on to the next girl in line waiting for you!
 

powpow

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PrettyBoyAJ said:
We're still together. I didn't get dumped.
what an amazing pvssy you are.

please tell me you have at least one friend left that would physically smack you in the face for your mega beta male behavior right now.
 
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