I have a date planned with her on Sunday.
I've done a lot of introspecting and reflecting while at the same time approaching as much as I can to keep a balance.
My best friend is flirting with my girlfriend and she subtly reciprocates
- Thread starter vato
- Start date
I've done a lot of introspecting and reflecting while at the same time approaching as much as I can to keep a balance.
CAPSLOCK BANDIT
Master Don Juan
- Joined
- Jul 29, 2020
- Messages
- 2,824
- Reaction score
- 2,151
Your a fool because your approaching this sequentially as if her doing this is the problem, no, because she undoubtedly did many things before this point that would of been worthy of rebuff and she knew it, yet she continued to escalate her behaviour, probing you further until rebuff.
When you have somebody who is constantly probing your boundaries, you essentially have an enemy to contend with, but due to the nature of women, that being they ALL do this, the blame inherently shifts to us and so we must set and enforce the boundaries, we enforce by exercising another option and ghosting
When you have somebody who is constantly probing your boundaries, you essentially have an enemy to contend with, but due to the nature of women, that being they ALL do this, the blame inherently shifts to us and so we must set and enforce the boundaries, we enforce by exercising another option and ghosting
Update:
She broke no contact.
I've been doing a lot better lately. (She still comes to mind, just in case someone comments: "u sTiLL cAre aBouT heR!!!!").
Went out with friends this Saturday to my usual spot. It's a bar she never wanted me to go to during our relationship because it's always packed with stunners. Anyways, I was having fun, laughing, dancing and socializing with random people.
The day before, I had approached an Albanian hottie and texted her to come this place.
In my drunk state I saw my ex's face in the crowd and saw her eyeballing me across the bar. I turned my back, went to my friends, grabbed a drink and just chilled until the Albanian chick showed up.
When Albanian showed up I sat with her, talked, bought drinks and homerun. Closed the deal.
3 am I get this text from my ex:
"I hate you, I hate you more than words can explain. The only time I go out, you're there right in front of me. I hate you, I wish I never met you, I regret every single thing I did for you. You don't even deserve this text. You knew this would break me. You knew it, that's why you did it in front of me. You don't deserve and have never deserved someone like me. So ****ing disrespectful. I've thought about you every day, I've missed you every day, I've wanted to text you, call you EVERY DAMN DAY. But you??? No, you're the wh*re I knew you were but didn't want to believe you were. But thanks for this. This was EXACTLY what I needed to actually get over you."
I didn't reply to this text. And on Sunday she sent me another text:
"I would never do this to you. You were standing in front of me, messing around with that girl??? Do I deserve no respect at all? I would NEVER do this to you. N E V E R. I've tried to get over you but I can't, but you? You're out every weekend and yesterday you behaved like that. I've been sitting at home every weekend, everyone's been out but I've been at home, I've been depressed. WHY AREN'T YOU HURTING? WHY WAS THIS SO EASY FOR YOU? WHY? WHY ARE YOU FEELING GOOD? WHY ARE YOU HAPPY? YOU SAT THERE AND HELD HER IN YOUR ARMS RIGHT IN FRONT OF MY EYES. WHY DID YOU LEAVE WITH YOUR ARMS AROUND HER? I HATE YOU!!!!"
I replied with "my intention wasn't to hurt you" and this is a fact.
She kept texting, saying things like "you were the one I was supposed to marry", "you were the one I was supposed to have my children with".
Then she blocked me.
She broke no contact.
I've been doing a lot better lately. (She still comes to mind, just in case someone comments: "u sTiLL cAre aBouT heR!!!!").
Went out with friends this Saturday to my usual spot. It's a bar she never wanted me to go to during our relationship because it's always packed with stunners. Anyways, I was having fun, laughing, dancing and socializing with random people.
The day before, I had approached an Albanian hottie and texted her to come this place.
In my drunk state I saw my ex's face in the crowd and saw her eyeballing me across the bar. I turned my back, went to my friends, grabbed a drink and just chilled until the Albanian chick showed up.
When Albanian showed up I sat with her, talked, bought drinks and homerun. Closed the deal.
3 am I get this text from my ex:
"I hate you, I hate you more than words can explain. The only time I go out, you're there right in front of me. I hate you, I wish I never met you, I regret every single thing I did for you. You don't even deserve this text. You knew this would break me. You knew it, that's why you did it in front of me. You don't deserve and have never deserved someone like me. So ****ing disrespectful. I've thought about you every day, I've missed you every day, I've wanted to text you, call you EVERY DAMN DAY. But you??? No, you're the wh*re I knew you were but didn't want to believe you were. But thanks for this. This was EXACTLY what I needed to actually get over you."
I didn't reply to this text. And on Sunday she sent me another text:
"I would never do this to you. You were standing in front of me, messing around with that girl??? Do I deserve no respect at all? I would NEVER do this to you. N E V E R. I've tried to get over you but I can't, but you? You're out every weekend and yesterday you behaved like that. I've been sitting at home every weekend, everyone's been out but I've been at home, I've been depressed. WHY AREN'T YOU HURTING? WHY WAS THIS SO EASY FOR YOU? WHY? WHY ARE YOU FEELING GOOD? WHY ARE YOU HAPPY? YOU SAT THERE AND HELD HER IN YOUR ARMS RIGHT IN FRONT OF MY EYES. WHY DID YOU LEAVE WITH YOUR ARMS AROUND HER? I HATE YOU!!!!"
I replied with "my intention wasn't to hurt you" and this is a fact.
She kept texting, saying things like "you were the one I was supposed to marry", "you were the one I was supposed to have my children with".
Then she blocked me.
Last edited:
Macadellic
Senior Don Juan
- Joined
- Nov 1, 2021
- Messages
- 388
- Reaction score
- 514
You did everything she did to you, but you did it while single, she did it in a relationship with you.
lol her frivolous gaslight attempt.
lol her frivolous gaslight attempt.
What happens, IN HER MIND, is that she comes to see you as WORTHLESS simply because she hasn't had to INVEST anything in you in order to get you or to keep you.
You were an interesting diversion while she had nothing else to do. But now that someone a little more valuable has come along, someone who expects her to treat him very well, she'll have no problem at all dropping you or demoting you to lowly "friendship" status.
Quote taken from The SoSuave Guide to Women and Dating, which you can read for FREE.
BackInTheGame78
Moderator
- Joined
- Sep 10, 2014
- Messages
- 15,105
- Reaction score
- 16,417
Both your friend and your girlfriend view you as a doormat or someone weak because otherwise they would not treat you this way.
Over time you have taught them it's OK for them to treat you like this. Start teaching them that it's not and start today.
They may push back at first. Stick to your guns. Eventually they will accept things have changed and will be re-trained so to speak.
Over time you have taught them it's OK for them to treat you like this. Start teaching them that it's not and start today.
They may push back at first. Stick to your guns. Eventually they will accept things have changed and will be re-trained so to speak.