Most obvious come-on that was missed

MVPlaya

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Ehhhhh...

Posted by jbbrain
I was standing naked in my living room with my ballsac hangin really low while this HB9 was lying flat on her back, pulling on my thighs so that I could bend over. Apparently, she wanted my balls dipped in her mouth like a T bag.

I wasn't sure, so I got up instead, put on my clothes and muttered..

"Bytch, this is ridiculous, I ain't no Earl Gray!!"
LOL, ehhh... in a situation like this, how could even the most AFC of AFC's not catch the come-on? I think you understood it, but didn't want to (why, she was a 9 right?). BTW., how did you get in this situation?
 

Mr_Pink

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My Freshman year the girl I'm going after now actually came onto me and I completely ignored it. I had a horrible case of one-itis on this other chick and blew it off. It dawned on me one day when this girl said something to the effect of how she was tired of trying on me. She then dated some assclown for 2 years.

I eventually got to know her, and now really like her and are trying for her, but it probabley won't work. I still kick myself in my ass for this one...

-Mr. Pink
 

MVPlaya

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Originally posted by recruiter
Groan.

"My grandmother died, and my dad hugged my mom. My aunt hugged my uncle. And there I was, with no one to hug."
Why was that? Was the grandmother the one you would usually "hug"?
 

MVPlaya

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Halloween

Since its Halloween, I think its only right I share a Halloween story with you guys. Last year (Senior Year in High School), we have this HUGE halloween party at one of my friend's places and I'm dressed as Tarzan (its in Cali people). Well, this chick I wacked to throughout all high school (still do, occasionally) happened to have been dressed as Jane (maybe not Jane in particular, but she had that female explorer in the jungle with sexy shorts and a straw hat look going for her). Well, we go upstairs with a couple people and everyone is just going from here to there, at some point the two of us end up alone and we talk and then I joke about the two of us having complementary costumes. Well, she says to me, "I bet Tarzan f___ed Jane's brains out, what do you think." I say that I wouldn't know. To which she replies, "well, I'm sure you and I could try and guess about it?" One of my platonic friends told me that she thought I was gay after that night... I almost do too (JK).
 

Carpy

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I had a decent conersation going with a pretty hot chick one night. We were drinking of course. She had just gotten a tongue ring a week or so before. She says "you know carpy, my tongue is finally all healed and i havent had a chance to try it out yet" I said, "yeah, that must have hurt. How long do they take to heal"
She got a funny look on her face and just answered my question. Needless to say i woke up the next morning with just a hangover.



Another time at a party i'm sitting there with my elbow resting on my leg and my hand just dangling between my knees. This chick walks up and says "why do you have your hand between your legs?" I'm like, I dunno. She says "havent had sex lately?" i said, no. She says "I havent either" I'm like, yeah it sucks doesnt it?

I'm still amazed at my retardedness.
 

wysiwyg6000

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freshman year of college this chick i sat next to used to playfully hit me often, laugh at my jokes, and even complimented me on my new shoes...I was going to close the deal but she had a boyfriend at the time, wtf?
 

Leon Phelps

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On the bus, im tlakin to someone else.

Girl writes her number on my arm, says to call her.

I never call.

So sad
 

Beige

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I walk into a subway train. I initiate ec with a girl that's standing 3 ft from me, she smiles. I look away, turn my head, get a seat and ride home thinking about how I f*cked it up.
 
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Y O Y DIDN"T I TAKE THE "BLUE" PILL!!!!
 

SamePendo

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No, you have issues.
 

B9

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bumb

How about moving this thread to the archives?
 

Eternal

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Those wanting this to go to The Archive...Wish granted.
 

MVPlaya

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Originally posted by crazykid
Those wanting this to go to The Archive...Wish granted.
One time I asked the Mods to put this thread under the archives... well, crazykid did it for me and even said "wish granted." Damn, I totally missed this was a complete come-on.

Sighs...
 

Anonymous56

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Oh man memories..don't even ask how I remember these..maybe because I absolutely tried to kick my own ass after blowing it.

Ok 8th grade library (girl I am friends with wiggles chair towards me right next to me.) "<insert my name here> were going to have sex!"

Same year:

Another girl was ABSOLUTELY obsessed with me and she smoked weed a lot(she was real hot though).

(calls me on the phone) "You should get high with me and take advantage of me, come over right now"

Lol those were the days...I was so nervous in these years I would shake if I saw a girl even look at me, LOL.

FYI these girls are absolute disgusting garbage now.
 

D4H

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I remember back when I was in 8th grade, clueless with females , there was this girl who moved into the neighborhood who all the guys liked. We would hang out at her house, talk with her friends (girls), all the time.. and this girl constantly flirted with me. Hugging on me, me and her being pretend husband and wife... and her grinding me playfully all the time. Sitting on my lap, grabbing my **** and all kinds of stuff. One night i was heading over with some friends to get something to eat and she didnt want me to leave, while we are hugging and she has her arms around me as usual... she gives me a kiss on the lips. My first kiss. (I was AFC as hell). She says "come back to see me later ok?" i say "ok". Later on that night when we see each other we are hugged up again and she has her arms around my neck.. and i was nervous as hell... i didnt know how to kiss and was nervous. We just sit there looking at each other, she was waiting for me to kiss her this time. It didnt happen. Luckily she didnt lose interest after that night. Another time when everyone was hanging out at my house she was there too hanging out. GUys were all asking who who she liked the most out of all of us and she sat on my lap wrapping her arm around my neck saying "ofcourse my husband". Oh by the way, she was a junior in HS i was in 8th grade. She always would flirt and make jokes about giving me head, and i PICKED UP on each and everyone one of them but was too AFC and scared to do anything about them. While she was in my house that day with the rest of us, i give her some icecream cuz she went in my refridgerator. Later on that day when its just her myself and another friend, she kept on BEGGING to go to my house to get some more 'icecream'. I knew what she meant by icecream, yeah MY 'icecream'. She would hug onto me looking into my eyes saying she thinks its time she gets some of my icecream. I being so AFC just say "No, i want the rest of the icecream for myself". To this day all i think was i wish a HB like that WOULD tell me she wants to go to my house, just her and I for some 'icecream'. This girl was a freak/hoe too. *Sighs*.
 
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Capt.Jack Sparrow

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Originally posted by MVPlaya
One time I asked the Mods to put this thread under the archives... well, crazykid did it for me and even said "wish granted." Damn, I totally missed this was a complete come-on.

Sighs...
...

Anyways, about in May, I was in the park walking around when all of a sudden 3 girls (1 hb7 and the 2nd 8, 3rd... lets continue) come up to me and start hitting on me.

hb7 says "I live pretty close around here.. and my parents arn't going to be home til 11:00 .m."

Being the idiot I was, I kept my mouth shut and passed this moment up..

I'm banging my head againest my desk right now ..
 

Atratus

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This one is a classic - so that it hurts eXtra bad!
[girls bumps into me a stumbles a bit]
Girl: [Giggle giggle], I'm falling for you, [giggle giggle].
Me: [Smile] I know. [Move on]

This isn't a come-on, but it's a pretty wry reminder of how i just don't give a ****:

Girl: Where is xxxxgirl?
Me: Not here.
Girl: Oh i know she's with yyyfaggot.
Me: [cringe]
 
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