Most obvious come-on that was missed

[salthepal]

ok guys, here's another i forgot when i posted my first reply .

if u've read my other post (it's on pg14) u'll remember i didn't make my moves coz i was ill .. when i came back home from that conference, i had 2 stay at hospital for a whole week ..

well, the night shift nurse was a MAGNIFICENT HOTTIE, 9 at least.. and there were a lot of things i could have busted her ass about (and i did, to a certain extent, considering my health situation) , she was kurdish (i could have made her teach me a few words, teased about about the cause, if ur not middle eastern u won't get this, that's ok), she had a funny name(a guy's name actually) ..

as my nurse, she had to take my temperature, measure the blood pressure, etc .. she would hold my hand while doing that which was ok, when she came to sit on the side of the bed i wouldn't give her space, so all the while my leg would be touching her hot ass .. and she didn't mind .. is it becoz her job requires that, or did she like me(i had gotten really skinny and was tired at the time), or maybe a show of pity? i don't know..

anyway, due to my condition and the annoying fact that my dad stayed at the hospital with me ( yes, he actually loves me that much !! and it wasn't becoz of the nurse , he made that decision before he even saw the nurse) i didn't even grope the hottie(difficult considering i had an IV drip stuck in my hand), but i should have gotten her contact info (u know, her number, where she lives, etc.) but i didn't ..

 

[desert_dweller5]

Originally posted by improvingdonjuan

her " man, im really horny. and there is noone home so today im going to be all alone"

if a girl ever said that to me I'd be like dude are you asking me to **** you? how clueless can a guy be? man, that's alli have to say. u are damn lucky to even have had that experience!!!!!!

 

[Caesar]

I got one...today in bio class we were watching a movie on a frogs life cycle. When we got to the tadpole cycle, the girl I sit next to says "it looks like sperm." I didn't know what to say and I'm sure everyone around us heard. So I just pretended I didnt hear her.

Caesar

 

[b's nuts]

the most obvios come on I missed, its ridiculous, im ashamed, and i hope next time i can actually not be a jack ass. My mom worked at this girls camp, I was up there for a weekend (GOLD MINE!). A girl I had a crush on all year asked me to come sleep with her in her sleeping bag. I blew it off. Can it get any more obvious?

 

[Revlis]

Ok, my turn

A girl that I worked with once (HB8) started to enjoy talking to me all of a sudden. A week or so later she came up to me and said...

"Johnny just asked me if I wanted to come over to his to watch a video tonight."

Me: "So what what did you say?"

HB8: "No thanks."

Me: "Ok, why not?"

HB8: "He scares me a little, I'd rather watch one with you!"

Well we never watched that video and it kinda sucks because she had the finest ass around!

 

[desert_dweller5]

Homer Simpson Style

All I have to say to this thread is
DO'OH

These post are hillarious. keep em comin boys!!

 

[Cheiradawg]

This was back in my afc days

So it's Halloween Night at my college and I go up to the dorm where my friends stay. We chill out get drunk smoke alittle. HBFriend from HS (HBFHS) IM's my boy and says she wants me to come down and see her(she lived in the same dorm). So I go and see her we talk then she asks me to help her with her costume.

Alittle about the chick and the situation: she was the hottest most popular girl in my class. This girl was a cheerleader drove a BMW ect. The only reason I really got to know her was because at college the people from our HS stuck together for the first year.
Anyway back the the story.
Her costume was Britney Spears (complete with a hit me baby sign on the back) and she proceeds to try on all of her shirts, stocking, bras, ect. I would have to turn around and not watch while she changed, but that was how it went. Then she would asked my opinion and I would mumble something.

Then we go out, get drunk, have a good time, then start back to the dorm. On the way back she graps my hand, and she walks me back to her room. When we get there she throws my hand away says I am a ****ty hand-holder (I was barely holding onto her hand because I was afraid to touch her). Then she said, "I wanted some ass tonight." I say nothing to that comment, then say bye and head back up to my buds room.

This was the chick that I used to wack it to every night. I had her up on such a stool that ... we'll you all just read. I could have banged the chick I wacked it to for a year. What a ****in' lucky bastard I could have been. Thank god for soswave.

 

[J2K]

Cheiradawg, the Halloween story, cheerleader, BMW, and great looking girl that you could've been hitting, sounds all to familiar to me (we will call her girl AAA). Halloween last year and it's a girl's birthday party (girl BBB) at her house, not the one I missed out on, me and one of my bodybuilding competitors decide to go as chippendales. We show up, got the bowties, wife-beaters, tight black breakaway pants, cufflinks, babyoil, slicked back hair, the whole nine yards and AAA, who I had been liking for the past 2 years but only occasionally spoke to, comes up gives me a hug, grabs the glutes. Anyway, my friend went with a g-string under his pants and gave the birthday girl, BBB, a little striptease (kept the g-string on). Well anyway, AAA sees him do this and comes up to me, hugs me again, grabs the glutes again and tells me to go into girl BBB's bedroom, put on one of her thongs and give her, AAA, a private striptease. I say that a girls thong won't fit a guy in the front. What was I thinking. She could've cared less about the striptease, she wanted me naked. Then after the party, she leaves me with a peck on the cheek, obviously angry that I didn't pick up on what she was insenuating.

That's not the only thing I'd missed out on with her. We had a study group at a restraunt last year, again she's all over me but I play it off. Me and a friend go just to shoot the sh!t, have a good time. We're sitting in a booth, she comes and sits on my lap and starts massaging my shoulder. Missed opportunity number one. Here's the big one for that night: as we're leaving, standing in the parking lot, she comes up to me and does her lips like she wants to kiss me, and being the dumbas$ that I am, shake her hand. She then proceeds to touch the glutes yet again. How clueless could I be? Countless other oportunities with the same girl, but those were the two biggest ones.

 

[Evo]

well i am still unsure about this so u guys can yell at me for this one if its was a sign well she was a like a close female friend i guess she c me as friends and we talk about sex quite often and she tells me that she think she wants to lose it with this guy (call him guy A) when one day we were walk to get some alcohol she goes u kno i dont think i want to lose the virginity to guy A and i was like o so u just want to wait till wat feels right and we got trash at aunt's house cuz no one was home (had beers) and i was taking a piss she is behind me and saids can i c it and i didnt react too much to wat she said cuz i thought she was just a friend. so i still dont kno if its a sign?

 

[bp1974]

Me, 17 years old, at joint school 'disco', in full social anxiety mode

HB comes up to me on dancefloor - "You go to **** school, right?"
Me - Yeah
Her - I like boys from that school
Me - Um.. Guess I better find another school
Her - What's your problem? F*ck off!

Man, I was such an arrogant d*ck. Wait a minute, I still am.

 

[Squy]

It makes me wonder...

If chicks have developed their own super special strange ability. That makes them extremely attracted to guys who are truly 100% in a not-interested-mode.

 

[ShizamDaMan]

"I'm really horny right now."

Yeah, I know. Shoot me

 

[MVPlaya]

Originally posted by Raoul
Many times..(I still wince at my AFC days)...but the following was the absolute act of stupidity on my part.

At French :

I'm reading a book - fantasy book "So You Want To Be A Wizard". Dumb title, incredibly stupid book. This chick...probably the second hottest in the class, comes over to me. I just joined the class a few weeks back.

Her : Hey, whatcha readin'?
Me : <booktitle>
Her : Oh, that sounds interesting, can I borrow it when you're done?
Me : *mumbling* ok.

After class she reminds me to bring it the nest lesson. The next lesson she gets my name from another guy and calls across the room to me.

Her : Finished the book?
Me : No, it's a bad book.
Her : Can I still borrow it?
Me : You wouldn't like it.
Her : I'd still like to try.
Me : Trust me, you wouldn't like it.

Back and forth, me and her literally aruging about the damn book across the room. She even asked for my number, so that she could call me to return it, or if she found it interesting. My response?

"Trust me, it's a BAD BOOK."

ARGH! All that over a stupid book, and I don't even see she's interested in me. She left the class the following year, and THEN I find out from her friend she'd been eyeing me the moment I stepped into the class.

And then there's the time I was moping around on New Year's Eve at a party, and this 9 (I NEVER rate chicks a 9, my standards are too high) comes over and starts to chat me up. But if I relate that I'm just going to depress myself.

Thank God for the Forum, and that I actually wised up.

- Raoul

HAHAHAA!!!!!!!

That was the funniest come-on-that-was-missed that I've heard. But its cool though, weve all been there.

 

[MVPlaya]

GOD I HATE MYSELF FOR THIS

Chancealot, I think I should kill myself for this.

When I was a senior in high school, I had a project that I had to do for my English class, our partners were randomly assigned and (thank heaven) I got paired with 5 girls, actually, the 5 hottest girls in that class, those girls had me so turned on. Well, somewhere along the line, were all at my place, working on this project, and the conversation shifts to movies, especially trilogies (their topic, not mine)... well, one wanted to ask me what my favorite trilogy is, but, out comes:

"What's your favorite threesome... ehh. I mean... three... trilogy"

Keep in mind this girl was an 8 (the lowest there was a 7.5, this one, however, became homecoming queen and went to UCLA). I, however, brushed it off as a verbal mix-up (although I was aroused). For the next hour, her and one other girl are flirting with me and giving me some kino (AT THE SAME TIME) and there were rumors that the other girl who was giving me kino (not the homecoming queen, but hot nonetheless - a 9) was bi. Later on the project ends and the three other girls leave together, these two girls stay. One "needs to use the bathroom" the other wants to "work a little longer." Once the others are gone the two girls are both sitting on my side, at the couch, and they are flirting with me again and kino'ing. I know what you would do, show her your favorite trilogy, yourself and those two girls back to back, but... no. Being the retard I was I chicken and say I need to go and I cut it short. I have blueballs from that missed opportunity to this day, I didn't MISS the clues, I just had no idea what to do. And those two girls had the niced asses (oh yeah, faces too) and what man doesnt want a 3some?

--------

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Sign up here: http://www.sosuave.com/vBulletin/showthread.php?s=&threadid=39893

 

[B9]

Mine is bad....

18-year-old, senior in the gymnasium. One day I notice this HB 9/9.5 freshman (let us call her CNE) is eyeing me at school whenever I look at her. Well, don't read anything into it, as the AFC I am.

So, a few weeks later, I am at this club, and there CNE is: The ornament of the dancefloor, there is not a hotter girl at the club - not only is she eyeing me, she is smiling at me and even winking!

What does the master DJ do? Nothing whatsoever. I just smile back.

It gets worse....

Next Friday, I actually get a second chance. Same club, and this time I do approach her on the dancefloor. Do some wild dancing, and go out for some fresh air. There's another guy I know who is also trying to get her and he goes up beside her as we walk out. He says something stupid and she say "No, I think I'd rather get to know B9 then" and walks over to me and slips under my arm as we start walking.

Ok, so she blatantly wants me, I just need to ride it home, right?

Except I have no idea about how to DJ her at all and nothing happens whatsoever that night either.

Unsurprisingly, her IL dropped dramatically after that...

After that, I decided I had had enough of being an AFC...

 

[B9]

Originally posted by The Matrix: Reloaded
Man... some of these that I have read are some of the saddest things that I have ever heard of... but I think that I can still have most people beat... because that's how much of an average... no I wasn't even average. I was the Perfect Frustrated Chump.

Get this scenario:

I'm hanging with one of my female friends, and we are headed to my house (remember I am a huge AFC, so sex wasn't nearly on the brain... either one) and I make a joke about cooking naked in my kitchen, because I was going to make her something to eat... damn I was such a loser. Anyway, I'm rummaging through the fridge and when I look up... she is ass naked! I froze... I didn't know what to do or where to even begin *slaps head* Oh man... this gets a lot worse. I should really burn in somewhere for this one... Oh my God what an ass!!! Anyway... so she doesn't but all of her clothes on and basically she is in her underwear and a my robe. So we're upstairs and she's sitting in my lap (I would Judo kick myself if I could) It still gets worse guys. We walk into my room for something... I don't remember. She proceeds to throw me unto the bed and climbs on top of me... this gets worse by the way. After a few innuedos here and there... she just flat out asked me if I wanted to have sex... and how did I respond? "I don't want to be late for school." (I was cutting school that day and wanted to make it before lunch ended so I wouldn't get caught.) Do you believe that? To this day... I can never forgive myself... anytime I ever get nervous about approaching I always think about that and then I snap out of it. Guys... go ahead and laugh... I sure as hell do.

The Matrix: Reloaded

This really has to take the price....

Did you not want it? What the feck is the matter with you? A simple 'yes' would have sufficed! You deserve all the punishment you get in the afterlife.

Reading this thread it sure as hell is no wonder why girls leave it to the guys to approach. Oh my fvcking god.

 

[B9]

bump

^

 

[Ol'BlueEyes]

He he...oh, if I could turn back time

Last year, around this time (I remember I was Christmas shopping in the mall). I had just bought my first leather jacket a week earlier and was feeling mighty cool in it.

I was making the rounds in a department store when these two HB's came towards me. I tried (in my inimitable AFC way) to play it cool, just checking merchandise out. Just as they walked past, one of them took her purse and *smacked* my ass with it. Two cute giggles followed.
And what did I do? Of course I was completely aghast....NEVER had any woman made a pass at me in my life (let alone TWO HB's!!!).
I kept walking and never saw them again.

 

[MVPlaya]

Matrix, WOW!!! HOLY SH!T, THAT IS BAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAD!!!!!!!!!

Hey, at least you're not the guy who did everything for this girl he knew and when she suggested something he'd do it immediately, As I remember it, it ended up with her saying she wanted to *****-slap someone and he volunteered... after which she let all her friends join the party and he felt happy she paid attention to him, that does hold the AFC record... but that's not a come-on though.

 

[jbbrain]

I was standing naked in my living room with my ballsac hangin really low while this HB9 was lying flat on her back, pulling on my thighs so that I could bend over. Apparently, she wanted my balls dipped in her mouth like a T bag.

I wasn't sure, so I got up instead, put on my clothes and muttered..

"Bytch, this is ridiculous, I ain't no Earl Gray!!"