Married 6 months...wife is changing...

[MattC80]

Nothing but bj's for you from here on out son because if you get this ***** pregnant you're going to have to go into hiding or flee the country in a lame attempt to avoid child support. Not that a woman who asks you to hurry during sex likely gives bj's. Yeah go see an attorney and figure out an exit plan. Don't marry divorced women and for the love of all that is good date a woman at least 6 years younger preferably more. These baby rabies women are not more mature just more tricky. If you choose to continue with this women expect things to get worse I'm talking zero sex. She probably will also cheat cause she obviously has no respect for you asking you to hurry. I've had a girl tell me to hurry dumped the *****. You can't just dump your wife so see a lawyer today.

I haven't had a Bj since we've been married. She cut that off after I proposed.

I am seriously considering finding her ex husband and getting some answers here.

 

[TheMonkeyKing]

OP,

It doesn't really sound like this woman is in to relationships. It sounds like she's in to satiating her own personal agenda. And that is to have a child and be kept by a man (whether is be her ex or you).

The fact she's been married twice in seemingly as many years is a MASSIVE red flag; probably one of the biggest you can ever see. Along with many, many others you have described.

'Hurry up' on your wedding night....?? I would have annulled the very next morning. It's also a sign that you need to review your seduction techne.

Dude, you've really dropped the ball here! I would end this as quickly and smoothly as possible.

 

[foreverAFC]

I haven't had a Bj since we've been married. She cut that off after I proposed.

sorry matt, but you are a sucker

 

[PeasantPlayer]

Marriage is a social construct when will humans realize that. Humans are not meant to be married. The thought of marriage always seemed strange to me

 

[christoff522]

Brief story here...

Met my wife at my job. I'm 32, she's 30.

We both work in finance and I always had sort of a thing for her, but when we first met she was married. We got to know each other on recruiting trips through our job. Her and I and a few other associates would fly to different parts of the country and we'd always make small talk and I could sense we were connecting. I was sort of frustrated because she wasn't available - and I was in the later stages of breaking it off with my girlfriend.

This was about two years ago.

At the beginning of last year, she and her husband divorce. They were married for 2 years. She wanted kids and he didn't and I guess he kind of drifted away from her. She tried to get him back but he was already banging some girl. She got all pissy about this and started crying a lot. She then started asking me if she was prettier than her and I told her to forget about him.

So she wasn't in a good place - but it didn't take long before we were doing things together on the weekend and we got pretty close.

We started dating, got official, having sex on the regular and things were amazing and nearly perfect. I went fishing with her dad and met almost all of her family members. I text her brother like every other day. We attended a few weddings over that summer so she met all of my family.

We dated for about 13 months and I proposed to her. Things were OK during the engagement phase but not great because she was going buck wild with planning it and sort of ignoring me which pissed me off. We werent having sex very much during this time and she was putting on a little weight.

On our wedding night she kept telling me to hurry up when we were having sex and wanted me to orgasm faster. We went on our honeymoon - Turks and Caicos - and she was sort of doing the same thing. We were there for a week and didn't seem that into having sex with me.

We get back to my house, and she's moved in now and wants us to sell my house and buy a brand new one, and she's and pressuring me for a kid now but she's not even trying in the bedroom. We've gone a couple weeks without sex.

Last night we had a pretty big blow up and we've been fighting for awhile now. Nothing I do is good enough, even though I make a really good salary. She's also been spending a lot of time with her mom and she's sort of meddling a bit.

The other thing that pisses me off a bit is that we were Facebook friends when she was married and she had tons of photos of her and her ex-husband. She deleted them when we began dating, but she won't post photos of us together.

Another thing, she doesn't want to change her last name on her Facebook profile to my last name. But she did for her ex. I know this is petty, but it's disrespectful.

I'm considering counseling or at least a trial separation.

So yeah TLR - My wife is being a b!tch 6 months into our marriage.

Not being funny, but why don't you try standing up to her? You made your bed why not lie in it. She doesn't respect you because you haven't earned her respect. She wants an alpha male not a little sissy who does as he's told.
Just tell her "Don't disrespect me", if she does...leave.

But not forever, maybe for a day..then come back. Don't sell your house, tell her you want to stay there. That keeps you in control. All she's trying to do is control you, but she wants YOU to fight back and be in control. The more you give lee-way to her the more SHE will DISRESPECT YOU.

 

[Klammy]

I think 6 months is too long to get an annulment.

 

[Krueg]

Matt, I realize you may not want to hear some of the advice people here are giving you, it seems like you keep adding more info. trying to plea your case and may not want to believe she is setting you up. Or from all the information you gave us things are not looking good!

This is your life, you can do what you want. Though alot of us have been in your shoes and know whats really going on. I dont personally know your wife and or living conditions, but we are here to try and help...

None of this sounds good! I'd rather be single than stuck in a un-happy Marriage!!

 

[usernamedox11]

Mistake #1 is marrying someone was who previously divorced.

 

[dasein]

I would have been out the minute she started planning another wedding as a big deal event so soon after the divorce, perfect indicator of an entitled mentality.

Yeah, it's true, not many happily married men post here. The flip side of that coin is that not many depressed, miserable married men post here either, many are afraid of speaking out in any way or be labelled a failure. Good on OP for getting past that particular trap.

 

[Rollo Tomassi]

Congratulations OP, you've successfully recognized that you are the 'Plan B' man:

http://www.mirror.co.uk/lifestyle/s.../nearly-half-women-relationships-plan-4323872

I predict you'll take this information and do one of 2 things:

1. Go into denial because you were previously so optionless that you played the long con with this woman and wore her down for 13 months. You'll convince yourself it's not as bad as you think it is and put up with her apathy about you and her Alpha Widow behavior (wanna guess as to whether she was giving BJs to Plan A husband after they got married?).

2. You'll get pissed off, seek to annul or separate, maybe start divorce proceedings and then she'll either warm up and ƒuck you like a woman should until she gets pregnant ("accidentally" of course) and then goes back to comfortably fattening up even more safe in the knowledge that you're on the support gravytrain for 18 years,...

OR, she'll just see you as a sulky Beta in comparison to Plan A husband (who had the balls and foresight to ditch her for probably many of the same reasons you're discovering now) and move on to guys who give her more tingles than you have a capacity to deliver.

When she starts hitting the gym hard (for her health of course) you'll know this is the decision she made.

 

[MattC80]

Thanks for the responses so far. So I talk with her the other night and basically said that our sex life is a disaster. She got all defensive and basically was insulted by what I had to say to her. She said that maybe our sex life would improve if we were to move my mom out of the house. And then she would feel more comfortable about us being intimate. She's also mad at me because I'm refusing to talk about kids but we've only been married a few months and she hasn't been open to having that much sex.

I got kind of fed up with her this weekend because I wanted to go golfing with my coworkers and she got all angry that we weren't spending enough time together at home. I feel like I'm only a couple conversations away from exploding.

 

[MattC80]

Also she finally posted a photo of us together on Facebook. It's a photo from our wedding.

 

[marmel75]

Tell her if I wanted to spend time hanging out and watching TV I could do that with my friends and then leave

 

[LMFAO]

I really feel bad for anyone in this situation, woman acting completely different after marriage. A great read for non-married men, myself included.

 

[expos]

Here's what you are going to do Matt.

First, I would flat out tell her that you don't like her attitude and that you are going to do what you want. You have a life to live and you are allowed to go golfing, bowling, whatever. You are not going to spend your weekends sitting with her on the couch and listening to her gripe about babies, People Magazine, and Dancing with the Stars.

Second, I would go out with her and your friends and flirt with other girls right in front of her. Create some jealously, because right now she doesn't find you attractive BECAUSE she has complete control of you. You need to validate yourself.

Just another observation, but it looks like she just really wanted to be married again. It didn't matter to who, because it doesn't sound like she has the ability to love. You are being used.

 

[Kailex]

Can I just post links here? Because seriously...

Between The Rational Male... So Suave... Dead Bedrooms... No More Mr Nice Guy... White Knighting...

I think the OP has research for WEEKS.

Jesus.

Go talk to a lawyer ASAP. Stop talking to your "wife".

 

[MattC80]

She doesn't want her ex-husband back. She talked a lot of crap about him when we first started dating. So I think she wants nothing to do with him. I'm heading to bed here in a few minutes but I will read no more Mr. nice guy when I get the chance.

 

[Evan]

Sounds like a disaster. GTFO while you still can.

 

[YawataNoKami]

Mauser advice is solid. Be careful with the "oppsss I am pregnant".
She was 30 , baby rabies , wallet seeking mode, etc.

I have seen many "Alphas" crying like little girls in family court. Do not get married again.

 

[El_matador]

Ouch... this is not right. Being Married myself I would NOT put up with such bullchiet.

In my Opinion this is what I would Not do..

1. Get in a relationship with a childless recently divorced woman around the age of 30... nothing goods come out of this, even if she says she is over her ex. For all we know Ex was the love of her live, tingles forever, with the problem of not wanting kids...

2. Sounds like you were in love with this woman... and she getting divorced was your chance to get her.

3. After she divorced... YOU (White Knight )were there to fill her emptiness.

4. she's 30 and wants kids... you are an awfully good opportunity to reach that goal... + you make decent money... yay

5. She'd gotten divorced and now all she cares about is the wedding party and ignores you !! ???

6. Seems like you're a good man and with morals and such... Why do you let this wife princess of yours treat your like that?

7. You let her get away with a lot. You need to create some boundaries and stand your ground... Let her know you are willing to walk away if she does not Shape up...

All in all, it sounds like she does Not RESPECT you, and if she can't do that this early in you marriage... it is obvious that she does not LOVE you.

She damage goods, it all started bad and it may only may end up bad or worse.

DO NOT sell your house... so you can buy another one "together" that the recipe for you to lose it all in a the future after she gets the kid she wants...

This is just food for thought...from my experience and that of close friends of family!