I'm no expert on this ****, being a rAFC and all, but here's my two cents anyway:
It sounds to me like you are looking for a token. Something significant to make your relationship with this guy "official". Like the handing over of keys when you buy a car, or an engagement ring. Something to signify permenancy and commitment, so you can let go of any anxiety about the future of your emotions for this guy. You love him, and you want some assurance that your love won't go away, at least in the short term. In this case, you want him to "make it all official", so you can feel secure in your attachment to him.
But as someone mentioned earlier, you are doing something that all girls do: focusing on the specific little details, and not the big picture. You want single important signs and tokens, and you're not putting things together and seeing the patterns and collective meaning.
This guy is seeing you exclusively. He has revealed his affection for you in how he reacted when you got with someone else (if he didn't care, he wouldn't get jealous). He sleeps with you, talks to you, hugs you to sleep, hangs out with you, etc. These are all things people do together in a relationship. In fact, from what you've described (so there may be things we don't know because you haven't told us), it sounds like sans him coming out and saying "we're in a relationship now", there's not much more he could do to be in a relationship with you.
In other words, for all intents and purposes, you two are already in a relationship. You just haven't been given any tokens signifying such.
Are you happy with the time you spend together? Is he? Would you like to spend more time together? Would he? If so, just start spending more time together. Forget the token. You've already got everything else that the token is supposed to signify.
The last thing I'll comment on, is that from what you say, this guy is pretty awesome. It sounds like he could get other girls if he wanted. Yet he hasn't. He's only seeing you. But you know he COULD get other girls, and you know you can't control him. Deep down, you should realise that this is a big part of what attracts you to him so strongly. If you DID recieve some token of a "proper" relationship, you may find that your attraction for him diminishes, because there is no longer the thrill/threat of not having him. Perhaps he realises this, and so he's simply being crafty and playing his cards right so that you don't lose interest in him. This would explain all the "speaking in riddles" and stuff. He doesn't want to lower his game because he doesn't want to lose you, so he maintains the mystery.
By virtue of you being in love with him and asking us all how to "win" him (to win what you already have...), it appears what he is doing is working.
In other words, you love him. He is fvcking you exclusively and will hug you to sleep at night... what more do you want? Are you willing to fvck up what you have in an irrational attempt to get more (whatever "more" may be)?
