Maintaining high confidence

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I've noticed in meeting women, whether casually or with greater intent, my personality wavers quite a bit. It seems like at certain points that I have some charm, the charm that belongs to one who can have most any woman he wants... but at other times I am not so well-spoken and probably really awkward and I feel like the last thing women are looking for. This all occurs in the same day sometimes. It's as if I have two personas---one is fairly attractive I think, witty and well-spoken while the other is an immediate turn-off to women although obviously has the same looks and other qualities.
Today I was sitting at school and saw a pretty good-looking girl approaching from far off...when she finally came by she looked at me but she had this awkward expression on her face and I wondered if she thought I looked disgusting or just wasn't sure of herself. Then I started some small talk with her, although I stayed about 10 feet away and didn't get up to sit next to her (maybe that was my mistake) but none of the coke machines were working so I decided to go get a drink somewhere else. But I noticed when I was talking, it was like I got stuck asking questions and I only had a few things to add on top of them. She just answered and seemed like maybe she was amused at first but I couldn't think of anything to say and I was smiling at her. I could tell that awkwardness was there, like I was unattractive to her. Then when I came out of the building a few moments later and still couldn't find a drink, she was walking by and looked at me, then looked away and looked back and just had that terrible awkward look. I just said,"oh well, I guess no drink today"...and walked off. I don't know, maybe she wasn't attracted to me to begin with but it seemed like I made things awkward.
Then I met up with a friend and walked up to the art class and this girl (think I mentioned her in the last post, the one who struck a sexy pose for me) was sitting up there. I made eye contact with her but she was just staring at me...then all I could manage to say was,"Hi, how are you doing today?" She said "good" and left it at that. On the way out, she was talking to the petite chick (who I also mentioned in the last post I think) and cleared her throat as I went by. The girl who was staring at me came into my work the other day and I asked her how the holidays had been, she said "good, did santa bring you everything you wanted?" some small talk and she left but today when I saw her I was going to flirt with her...but she didn't smile. I wanted her to smile because I was gonna ask her,"so when you were sitting on santa's lap, is that the way you smiled at him?"

Anyway, I feel like when I'm off I'm really off but when I'm on I'm really on. I feel like I could seduce the one girl the way she was looking at me...but when I'm really off, my brain ceases to function and I get stuck looking overly friendly ("nice") and only saying things that lead nowhere ("Hi, how are you today?"). How can I stay on top of these lulls and stay vibrant and appealing? I need some pu$$y very soon and I'd like to have hers but there are many to choose from and I want to seem like THE MAN when I talk to them. Another thing that seems to plague me is that older women seem a lot friendlier to me than the ones that are around my age or younger. It's almost like I'm more attractive in their eyes or something. But I want to woo the one girl and possibly the petite still if I can't get her. How should I go about this and how can I overcome these times of awkwardness? Thank you if you read this far and tell me what you think.
 
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basically, I feel like I'm letting all these women down and myself because I know I have what they want. I think some of them even see what they want when they first look at me but once I open my mouth, it's disappointing because the things I say don't always come out so smoothly. I'm kind of a "thought out" type of person, maybe too analytical and sometimes I swear I don't sound like anyone else. lol
 

Alpine

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Just a hunch, maybe you don't give them much of a chance to talk about themselves, taking the burden off you for a while.

Don't tell 'em too much anyway, that's where your confidence is leaking away.
 
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Well, when I get into a good conversation and my aura is up then they usually do a lot of talking...but I think my problem is I'm having trouble getting them to open up because with this girl I can't get past the whole,"Hi, how are you?" thing. It really sucks because I imagined what I would say to her and her possibly loving it. It must be something related to my body language too...but I'm usually not able to keep the momentum of being the guy who glows, it fizzles out quickly. This girl is nice to me and maybe she's not interested but if I could make sure next time I talk to her that I'm in that great mood then it might work out nicely. I mentioned this girl in the last post from a month ago but I'd like to see where it leads...she was looking right into my eyes from across the room but I was awkward...I still said Hi and everything but I'm wondering how I should do this next time I see her.
 

Alpine

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I don't know you but everything about your post smacks HYPER.

Like you're on speed or something and never shut up.

I'd ask one or two close friends to give you some honest feedback on just your general interaction.

Another tip would be to video yourself and leave it running for a few hours. This gives you time to forget it's there. Then review the tape and see if this shows things you weren't aware off.

When you talk, try not to be listening to your own head chatter, focus on what the other person is saying, not what your saying to yourself.

I could be totally wrong and it's just you don't like paragraphs and punctuation.
 

Diaoz

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hey i'm in kindda the same plight as you.

I can be very smart, witty, funny, ****y etc. with a confident body language at times, but at other times, i just kindda have this brain freeze and really can't think of anything to say other than basic stuffs which is obviously boring.
 

Craig Reeves

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OK, apparently I need to write an article on communication with women. I'll have to get on that soon.
 

Delta

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actually,

it sounds like you're assuming too much. like all you had to do was make sure you play your cards right and you can't help but succeed....

alas, if only that were true.

actually, even if it were true i'd still be screwed.

anyhoo, it might be that they're not that into you... for one reason or another.

girls aren't there to ADMINISTER A TEST for heavens' sakes... well actually, they do at times but usually not straight away... if they think there's something there, they'll jump in on the conversation and make it easy.

if they're not into you, then you're fighting an uphill battle and that's a lost cause to anyone but the very best and maybe not even them.

delta
 
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