Kissing - When and how do you do it?

[Reyaj]

The title sounds basic but I am really looking for some helpful answers on this one.

I basically have the approach and pickup of girls down pat. I am able to often get a kiss close from them too..... but often times this is as far as I get. I am trying to figure out what I might be doing wrong... or not doing right perhaps...


I have been told by a lot of girls that I am a good kisser. But just as many girls have probably been flakes after I have kissed them. I always make sure I put a mint or gum in my mouth beforehand so I don't think its my breath......

For those of you who have success escalating a girl into bed.... please share your kissing moves/techniques

1. Do you always try to kiss them on the 1st date?
2. How do you set up the kiss?
3. Are you aggressive when you kiss them (control the tongue hockey) or do you assume soft lips and let them guide it?


Recently I have been trying to kiss girls on the 1st date... and although they have reciprocated I feel like they aren't feeling that "spark"

So any advice on kissing to raise a girls IL is very much appreciated!

 

[TheAsianLoverReturns]

Spark?

What is happening to mankind... That is what women say.

Grab your balls and go for SEX on the first date.

 

[logic1]

you are trying to kiss the wrong lips. This is where you use the tongue hockey

 

[countermart]

Try this

If you intend to seduce her and not just take her, remember a woman needs to be touched like her lingerie touches her. Very, very lightly stroke her with your finger tips on the small of her back, her arms, her neck, her wrists, the back and edge of her ears. Run your finger across her lips and trace her face. Look into her eyes. Be in no hurry. Make her wait and then kiss her again. Remember touch her lightly like gossamer, randomly stroking. Move the tips of your fingers, or just one finger over her body. Make her wait for the touch, then make it disappear, make her anticipate it. Kiss her on the neck, lick her neck, her ears, bite her lightly (sounds funny when you write it, I know). Then draw her into you firmly and enfold her, then let her go again. Kiss her again. Touch her again but more firmly, then lightly again. Be firm in the way you encircle her, a mix of dominance, patience, control, strength and gentleness. Escalate, then pull back and repeat. Take your time.

Do not be perturbed at all if she stops you. Do not be perturbed if you try to kiss her a few times and she turns her cheek to you. Let her come to you...

Otherwise you can just push her down on the bed kiss her passionately, and hopefully she will get the idea and go along with it lol.

It depends on the situation, but remember nothing will work, especially not the first para, if she does not feel basic attraction for you. If a woman feels attraction for you, you can touch her lightly with your fingertips anywhere, and I mean anywhere, and she will become turned on.

Countermart

 

[Mr.Positive]

Recently I have been trying to kiss girls on the 1st date... and although they have reciprocated I feel like they aren't feeling that "spark"

So any advice on kissing to raise a girls IL is very much appreciated!

Try showing a little bit more dominance...as you kiss her, pull her towards you.. You don't kiss with your lips...you kiss with your whole body. Also, try working your way down to her neck while one hand is running through her hair, and the other, holding her tight against you.

Trust me, with you nibbling on her neck, one hand in her hair, the other up and down her body pressed to yours...heaven, for her.

Again, patience is the word here.

 

[Reyaj]

Thanks for the responses. Mr. Positive you are saying to be dominant and countermart is saying to be gentle.....


See the reason I posted this thread is this...... In the past I used to kiss girls very gently on the first kiss and not even go for the tongue if they didn't lead.... I ended up getting flaked on after that a lot..... So most recently I been trying the opposite... I just been going in there (not hard or anything) but definitely trying to establish a dominant kiss... After the first kiss I even went back in a second time......

Now I'm not sure if this worked or not.... the girls didn't seem to flake right away... but because I wasn't able to see them again quickly they then flaked... I asked one girl about it.. and she said the kiss didn't bother her but she usually doesn't kiss guys that quickly. She said she was surprised when I did it at the end of our date (but she did kiss back)


So I guess what I need is more detail in how to make the first kiss work for me... Let's see we went to the movies and we go back to our cars.... well this is where I usually try my move......

Now is it good to grab her lower back and pull her right into you? Or should I be more gentle and maybe just rub the back of her neck when I kiss her lightly?


Guys who have had a good first kiss experience please describe in detail what you did... the level of force in which you kiss..., the length of time... where you put your hands.... Remember this is for the first kiss I am asking about where you made a good impression...

If I can get this part of my game down I'll be a Master!

 

[Boilermaker]

wow there's actually golden advice in this board.

I wish I saw this earlier

 

[betheman]

The kiss on the first date...I always go for this, if they dont respond, then that to me tells me there isnt going to be a second date.
how to do the kissy thing? you will know, SHE willplace herself close to you and look into your eyes, simply lean forward, at the same time put your hands gently on her waist, as your lips meet, just a slight rise in grip on her waist, dont force the tongue down her neck, if the kiss is prolonged, this might happen later but dont force it, lots of women are put off by sloppy lizard mouths.
if she has bare arms, light stroking of her arms is perfect while kissing as is sliding your hands up and down her waist gently but firmly while pulling her slightly more toward you so your bodies start to press together, raise one hand to stroke her cheek and neckthen move your hand round to the back of her head, run your fingers through her hair, gently grab a handful of hair (try not to pull her bloody head off) and give a gentle, playful tug...then see how it goes

 

[Reyaj]

The kiss on the first date...I always go for this, if they dont respond, then that to me tells me there isnt going to be a second date.
how to do the kissy thing? you will know, SHE willplace herself close to you and look into your eyes, simply lean forward, at the same time put your hands gently on her waist, as your lips meet, just a slight rise in grip on her waist, dont force the tongue down her neck, if the kiss is prolonged, this might happen later but dont force it, lots of women are put off by sloppy lizard mouths.
if she has bare arms, light stroking of her arms is perfect while kissing as is sliding your hands up and down her waist gently but firmly while pulling her slightly more toward you so your bodies start to press together, raise one hand to stroke her cheek and neckthen move your hand round to the back of her head, run your fingers through her hair, gently grab a handful of hair (try not to pull her bloody head off) and give a gentle, playful tug...then see how it goes

Very good description, thanks betheman, thanks!! A few questions;

1. Do you put both hands on her waist or just one and then the other later? I always felt more comfortable grabbing it with my right hand... but maybe not using both is what I've been missing....

2. Stroke the cheek? Do you do this with the back of your hand... a few fingers? I usually don't do this so this is something I can try.. What I tend to do is rub the back of her neck when we kiss... Is that what you mean when you say the back of her head.. or do you literally mean her scalp?

3. I never tried the hair tug or even thought of it.... I assume you have had success with this move?

 

[betheman]

"1. Do you put both hands on her waist just one and then the other later? I always felt more comfortable grabbing it with my right hand... but maybe not using both is what I've been missing...."

both whenever possible, also if your confident and feel its going ok, gently slide your hands down her waist so the palms of your hands anre gently pressing against her hip bones, dont dwell, just gently slde them back up again, later take your hands off her waist, then run the backs of your hands down the front of her waist so that again you brush her hip bones, then back up


"2. Stroke the cheek? Do you do this with the back of your hand... a few fingers? I usually don't do this so this is something I can try.. What I tend to do is rub the back of her neck when we kiss... Is that what you mean when you say the back of her head.. or do you literally mean her scalp?"

back of the hand, one hand, fingertips...mix it up but do it slowly and gently. no the back of her head, and neck


"3. I never tried the hair tug or even thought of it.... I assume you have had success with this move?"
yup again, just do it gently and briefly

 

[squirrels]

If there's one thing you want to know about kissing, it's what a girl told me during my "first kiss"....GENTLE.

Don't push your lips into hers like you're giving her a "MWAH" kiss. Just kind of...taste her lip...take it between yours but don't "suck", just feel the shape, the texture, the taste...take it all in. And most importantly, pay attention to how she responds to you.

Again....going to say it again because it's important....

PAY ATTENTION TO HOW SHE RESPONDS.

Women will tell you how to kiss them, if you're sensitive to it. What she does, take that, amplify it a little bit, and send it back at her. Then pull it back to tease her, then come back at her again. She asks (begs) with her lips, you deliver with yours.

If she seems to want to stay gentle, then stay gentle. If you get a sense she wants more open-mouth aggressive action, feel her out...see how she responds.

The best way to involve the tongue is to, after a little bit of kissing, just touch her lips with it as you're kissing her...completely non-invasive...don't jam it in her mouth. If she's down, her tongue will come into play as well. Your level of tongue-aggression should match hers, maybe the slightest bit more aggressive...like if she's at "6", you're at "6.1". If that makes sense.

It has its own rhythm...know when to get into it and when to pull back, like the lapping of waves on the beach. When in doubt, always return to that gentle lip-touch, re-calibrate to what she's "asking for", then send it back to her.

Remember, girls are ALL ABOUT kissing. I don't know a lot of women who, outside of a serious relationship, will come out and say, "Damn, I need to get d*cked down tonight", but just last night I had a girl texting me saying she was tipsy and "could use a make-out session".

If you're a lousy kisser, women will think about that when they think about getting "close" to you. You can be the best stud-f*ck in the world, but if the kiss isn't there, women won't be down. Or they will, but only if they're horny and nothing better is around.

If you're a GOOD kisser, women will fantasize about that crap. You want to make a girl think about you when you're not around? Learn to kiss. Learn to touch.

If you intend to seduce her and not just take her, remember a woman needs to be touched like her lingerie touches her.

That is some of the best "kino" advice I've ever seen on this forum. Kudos.

 

[Reyaj]

Betheman I used the "slight" hair tug and it was a success! Thanks for adding that move to my arsenal.

If there's one thing you want to know about kissing, it's what a girl told me during my "first kiss"....GENTLE.

Don't push your lips into hers like you're giving her a "MWAH" kiss. Just kind of...taste her lip...take it between yours but don't "suck", just feel the shape, the texture, the taste...take it all in. And most importantly, pay attention to how she responds to you.

Again....going to say it again because it's important....

PAY ATTENTION TO HOW SHE RESPONDS.

Women will tell you how to kiss them, if you're sensitive to it. What she does, take that, amplify it a little bit, and send it back at her. Then pull it back to tease her, then come back at her again. She asks (begs) with her lips, you deliver with yours.

If she seems to want to stay gentle, then stay gentle. If you get a sense she wants more open-mouth aggressive action, feel her out...see how she responds.

The best way to involve the tongue is to, after a little bit of kissing, just touch her lips with it as you're kissing her...completely non-invasive...don't jam it in her mouth. If she's down, her tongue will come into play as well. Your level of tongue-aggression should match hers, maybe the slightest bit more aggressive...like if she's at "6", you're at "6.1". If that makes sense.

It has its own rhythm...know when to get into it and when to pull back, like the lapping of waves on the beach. When in doubt, always return to that gentle lip-touch, re-calibrate to what she's "asking for", then send it back to her.

Remember, girls are ALL ABOUT kissing. I don't know a lot of women who, outside of a serious relationship, will come out and say, "Damn, I need to get d*cked down tonight", but just last night I had a girl texting me saying she was tipsy and "could use a make-out session".

If you're a lousy kisser, women will think about that when they think about getting "close" to you. You can be the best stud-f*ck in the world, but if the kiss isn't there, women won't be down. Or they will, but only if they're horny and nothing better is around.

If you're a GOOD kisser, women will fantasize about that crap. You want to make a girl think about you when you're not around? Learn to kiss. Learn to touch.



That is some of the best "kino" advice I've ever seen on this forum. Kudos.

You are so right Squirrels. Basically your philosophy on kissing is what I've tried to live by. The only issue I have is sometimes being too gentle got me a lot of flakes... But I guess its best to let her guide you. Now I make sure that my kiss is assertive though.. I don't mean that I start jamming her with my tongue, but I let her know she is kissing a man. I think being conscious of getting my hands on her waist and rubbing the back of her head/neck are things I'll keep experimenting with.

Btw one thing I found doesn't seem to work is going for a re-kiss. So in other words, if I have the first kiss with a girl I am out with and then we stop. Sometimes I have gone in again. I've gotten the kiss but I wonder if this shows to much desperation.

That leads me to another question... When you first kiss do you try to make sure you end the kiss first, or should she?

 

[PokerInTheRear]

I rarely go for the kiss on a first date, I usually wait for the second unless she initiates. I find leaving them wanting it after first date gets me in her head and leads further on date two.

However, if timing and feel is right, I will go for the kiss - usually during the date. I find with t the kiss out of the way, the girl relaxes and things progress better.

Once kissing, let her lead with the tongue. Some like, some not at all. Try gently moving the tip of your tongue across her lips as you kiss, this will usually get her going with some tongue action.

You need to be gentle and firm at the right times. You should pick up on this as the passion ebbs and flows. Move in slow and close and pull back a little for her to come get it. Tease and please...

 

[Scaramouche]

Dear Reyaj,
Like Poker,I never push things,Slowly,slowly catchee Monkey....They are all different so you need to be relaxed and observant when you make the first move....I have had a fair percentage that just collapse in a heap when you kiss their neck,nibble their ears...The lips are important sure,one lip at a time and make sure you suck your saliva back,never slobber...While you are kissing them,your hands should be gently moving up and down the side of their ribs,never go for the boobs YET...earlier on whilst you are sharing conversation,check out her dress,the objective is to get her Bra undone easily,if you fumble you reveal yourself as an amateur,so check out how the back of her top is tied together,then when you are holding her close,before you go for the Zip,check whether there is a hook at the top,undo,then slip the zip down,massage the back and shoulders for a while,then run your hand over the bra strap,check, it may need two hands,once that is undone pause for a while,then slip your hand over one breast,don't tease the nvipple YET,just gently cup not forgetting to continue your kissing,if she has a sensitive neck,keep returning to this weak spot,soon you will be able to slip the top of the dress over her shoulders,then basically she is a done Duck....one last tip,the removal of her skimpy nether garments takes practice,always pull down from the back.

 

[Reyaj]

I think everyone agrees that being relax and letting the girl lead the kiss is the best way to go. I have always had this philosophy since I started on here. However I have noticed I've gotten a lot of flakes after the first kiss. I then started going more agressive... While I may have gotten flakes I can't confirm this was the reason... it might have been because I didn't follow up for the 2nd date on time.

But here's what I will try doing different for the first kiss

I will try and get both of my hands on her waist... Caress her back of the neck and head with a little hair tug.. and also rub my hand slightly across the side of her face.

Scaramouche good advice on the bra... I find though even when I see what kind it is I still have trouble getting it off lol

Poker do you mind providing an example of how you execute your kiss and where your hands are etc...


Another thing is... once I past the first kiss and a few makeouts... I tend to get horney and start going hardcore tongue kissing.. I wonder if at that point its ok?

 

[Buddha_Mind]

Great thread. I have had issues with this myself. IE -- girl let's me drive her home 4 blocks but hit the friction with the kiss man! It's all about kino, I realized I went for a kiss with hardly any kino -- not smart -- makes you appear alien. Warming up -- I have found great deals of success with the neck. Seems women are super turned on by soft rubbing of the neck, not back of it directly, but left and right, coming down from the ear....I will try this "pulling of the hair" technique next time I can...

I suppose the more sensory neurons you can stimulate the better...make her feel you from a variety of different ways other than the lip and tongue

 

[Reyaj]

Great thread. I have had issues with this myself. IE -- girl let's me drive her home 4 blocks but hit the friction with the kiss man! It's all about kino, I realized I went for a kiss with hardly any kino -- not smart -- makes you appear alien. Warming up -- I have found great deals of success with the neck. Seems women are super turned on by soft rubbing of the neck, not back of it directly, but left and right, coming down from the ear....I will try this "pulling of the hair" technique next time I can...

I suppose the more sensory neurons you can stimulate the better...make her feel you from a variety of different ways other than the lip and tongue

Want to hear something fvcked up? I've had girls kino the hell out of me and then be reluctant about kissing!!! Unreal!!!!!!!!!!!! This game is killer

 

[Scaramouche]

Dear Reyaj,
Just a little observation from a misspent life....Asian woman,Mainland Chinese in particular,in my experience seem to kiss with reluctance.I quizzed a long term China Plate on this and she said it was a personal thing and that these Girls feel their mouths are unclean,interestingly it has no effect on their willingness to participate in genital activities as in general they are very,very generous Ladies.

 

[Big O]

Seems women are super turned on by soft rubbing of the neck, not back of it directly, but left and right, coming down from the ear...

Guys too, or at least me anyway. I've been trying to figure it out, but I made out with a girl in a dance club a few days ago and she kept clasping my neck. Vaguely reminded me of Star Trek death grip. Anyway, it was very nice. I think the sides are key as you said, not directly back of the neck.

 

[JimmyMack]

I suppose the more sensory neurons you can stimulate the better...make her feel you from a variety of different ways other than the lip and tongue

Reyaj, going off of what Buddha_Mind wrote, try this move that has been my go-to that takes it to the next level every time:

When kissing her neck, halfway between her jaw and ear, give a small, not too aggressive, bite with your mouth open about 1 inch. Then as you apply the pressure, gently lick the small area in between inbetween your teeth. Next, pull back about 2 inches and lightly blow on the area that is wet from your tongue. Trust me, this will send her over the top :rockon:

Also, a great move to do, after a few dates, perhaps when the foreplay is leading to sex, ask her to try "circle breathing" with you. Think of this as shot-gunning a blunt. Have her breath into your mouth, fill your lungs, and then breath out back into hers as she does the same. I'd bet a good amount she's never experienced this and it will send her over the top emotionally; she'll feel like you're "inside" her before the sex even starts. Also, if you really dig her it'll be pretty cool for you too

Let me know how it goes!