thanks for bashing me kyphan, you are a true friend .
first of all i am going to a party tomorrow night, private party hopefully there will be some hot girls in there.
the promised story, i'll make this short, she pushed me into the bathroom took off my pants, started to rub me with her hands slowly, after a while she said the best way to do it is to make everything smooth, took off a bottle of liquid soap, poured into her hands, this happened a few times and then....
today, was in class with her, after that i went to the labs, she came after an hour and said she wants to go home and eat, at first i said no using the excuses that her cats give me allergies, but since i wanted to go, i said "i am hungry as it is, lets go, but i am not going inside, the cats will be the end of me", we went and i grabbed some pizza from the pizza place, we walked to her place, on the way she said "how about eating with me in the apartment", i said "if i came this far i'll go upstairs, but if i start to get allergies, i am outa there". she was happy.
we went up, she made food, i started talking about how i am going to stay in the midzone of the house and not touch anything, she opened her arms and said "are you sure you dont want to touch anything", i said "yes i am sure!" we stayed for a while and she wanted to show me the wedding pics someone took in a wedding she was 2 days ago, mistake #1 .. i didnt see the pics at that time i just saw a blurry image on the camera viewport and i stupidly said, omg she looks fat. baaad move on my part, she closed the cam and was so offended she had tears in her eyes, my remark impact her big time, now you guys will think she is trying to use some emotional crap on me to get some attention.. i thought so too until she told me that someone in her family is anorexic and i hit a nerve, a big one, i apologized, i am not a complete idiot and crying girls are my Achilles Heel, anyways as soon as she understood i didnt see the picture well enough to notice it was her she hugged me and it was forgiven.
*seriously now, i did not mean to offend her, she is so ****ing hot with legs from here to the moon, but this taught me a good lesson, the word fat and girls.. dont mix.
then she wanted to watch some tv " she made up the bed, but i said "i am not going near that cat deathtrap", so she put a coat over the bed and i layed there near her, she started to cuddle, so i did what my friend wolf said, i used the hook bait release technique, took her hand and then i threw it away, at a later time i said "you know why we will be perfect in bed, we both like to do xxxxx, but its too perfect so it wont happen", i told her i wanted a backrub, she told me to take off my shirt and she happily gave me a massage pressing her body onto my back. was fun.
she touched my legs near the crotch area, so i did the same to her, but she said no, now here is when i made my second mistake (i think its a mistake, correct me if its not), i said "HB, do you know what you want from me?, because you cant get attention and physical closeness without giving something back", she said i can have everything beside kissing and touching the redzones on her, i said "i am very disappointed, i wont let you switch me on and off like this", she said she cant help it, she has to touch me ... here is the mistake, then she said "maybe i should try harder not to touch you"
anyways we managed to talk a bit more and somehow the fat subject rose again and the "not touching me part", but she still said she loves doing it.
we had a quick hug session where i kissed her neck and ear, she loved it, stopped me again after a few minutes.
so i figured i'd do something different, i told her to close her eyes and imagine her in my bed, i will spare you the details, but she got aroused and stopped me, so i said "so now i cant even talk?", i told her "there is no doubt in my mind i can make you ***" .. you know the rest, she said we cant do that...
somehow i said i have something to tell her but i immidietly regretted, she wanted to know what it was so bad that i said "i dont plan on telling you ever" then i layed back and told her, if i cant talk to you i will just close my eyes and imagine what i need, so i did exactly that, but she kept insisting i'll tell her so i closed my eyes and then she said that i wouldnt be able to resist her, she licked my belly, pulled away my underware just a bit and started to tickle me below the belt accidently touching you know what, she did it a few times but i resisted, once she couldnt get it out of me she walked up and said "i am not playing this game".. dont realy remember what happened next but she stopped, put her coat on and gotten ready to leave, i did not let her leave the apartment for a few more minutes, blocking the entrance, but since the time was already so late and we both were late for this class we hugged intensly and got out of the apartment.
i believe in learning from mistakes, so when we walked back to the uni we both went to different classes, i said "we'll talk sunday about the next exam" (its in 2 weeks folks..) i said "listen, you can keep touching me, its okay" she said "but you said you want more from me and i cant give you more, right ?" ... then i hugged her, she held me for a second with a tight hug, i smiled and said "good night" and walked away...
i hope i got that last point clear, i did not give her any validation for the fact i am not going to need more from her, but i also didnt lose my right to fight this insane idea that she can do everything but i cant do anything back, the point was left unsaid.
you guys, forget those silly bets, it means nothing, the end is not the goal, its the process of learning how to deal with these situations, how to make sure you are in control, how to be in control of what you say, do, think.
some after thoughts, she clearly feels very close to me emotionaly and physicaly, she wants to spend time with me and touch me, she clearly has some redzones, but i believe with some effort i can cross those zones, its a matter of how and not when. i realy need a better battle plan here. keep in mind that the next month is probably going to be daily study sessions with her, i found out the next 2 exams are so close, this needs some extra special attention.
i do plan on isolating her, somehow saying i gotta drive home and bring something i forgot, ask her to join me,..
isolation works better than anything else. push pull works on the day today basis.. the freezing tactic works when its on the realy last minute and she is realy aroused and on fire. one of her sweet spots is the ear, and i have access to that always. i can clearly arouse her by just talking about things and then i can kiss her neck and ear, she is melting in my hands when i do that.