I've been such a f'king sucker!!!!

[Jariel]

This is a follow up to this thread:

http://www.sosuave.net/forum/showthread.php?s=&threadid=69838

I finally got a response from the girl in question who told me that she doesn't want a relationship, I need to grow up and basically that she's a b1tch and proud of it. She also told me she never liked me as much as I thought, among other harsh things. And she was ignoring me just for the hell of it.

She has completely led me on, used me to boost her ego and stabbed me in the back!!

I thought she was a really great girl, but she deceived me with her sweet and innocent act, let me think there was something great between us, let everyone else think there was something great between us and now it's come to this.

I still have faith in women, but I'll be way more cautious from now on.

 

[Fenderules]

that sux, i'd tell her to **** off and not talk to her again.

 

[Don_Joffe]

Ive seen about 5 threads in the last hour about all you guys complaining how you getting played and how much of a looser you are or whatever.

Whats your guys problems(not aimed only at you, Jariel, but other threads tonight too)
You guys are either
1. Not learning properly
2. Not learning at all
3. Not applying what you have learnt
4. Blank out when you with the girl

Get your act together, if you dont, dont bother typing about how you got played, if you are a Don Juan, the word "played" or "sucker" shouldnt be in your dictionary.

 

[Double]

dude it's satisfying to know that i was right and she is NOT a quality girl and you should NEVER let yourself be disrespected but it suxx b/c you'r a cool guy. keep ya head up!

 

[rgeere]

It's women that act like this that screw men up. I agree now that things have come to head that she is not a quality woman and plays games.

I think you should be a bit skeptical about the nature of the e-mail, though. She could have very well had liked you and is trying to make you feel bad in self-defense because of her insecurities.

Like I said before, the only thing you can do now is chalk it up as a learning experience.

 

[Double]

And i hope you, rgeere will also learn from this experience.

 

[rgeere]

Originally posted by Double
And i hope you, rgeere will also learn from this experience.

If she was a good girl I wouldn't have been wrong about the situation. I already know that women like this exist, I just don't assume they all act this way.

 

[Don_Joffe]

By you guys encouraging him that its o.k, B.S. its not o.k, he got taken for a fool, he must be shown NO MERCY otherwise how is he ment to learn from his mistakes? And yes he made a mistake otherwise he would have her?

 

[Double]

but she wasn't and so my analysis of the situation was correct yours was wrong. but you will think what you want to think, and if you think that it was pure luck that i was right then keep on living in your own reality. if you're happy with your view of the world then thats fine, if not change something. but i hope you will stop insulting guys like me of being AFC when we give out advice that is accurate. thanx in advance

 

[Blue Phoenix]

Tell me something. Is this girl the same as this one you mentioned below?

Originally posted by Jariel

I met this HB8 for a date at the beginning of this month. She oozed sex appeal and I was really hoping to sleep with her sooner or later, but we didn't get on very well during the date. She cut it short and told me she didn't want to see me again.

Cooly and indifferently, I said "You're right. We didn't click". I shook her hand like a mate and wished her the best.

...She called me on boxing day for a chat, during which she apologised about our bad date, admitted she made a mistake and almost begged me for a second chance. She even tried to excuse herself, saying she was not feeling well the night we met and I got the wrong idea about her.

I told her I'd be in the city this afternoon if she wanted to meet me. Well, I'll spare the details, but she was like putty in my hands.

 

[Maximus_Decimus]

Jariel, I read the original post and it is unfortunate it turned out like this but nevertheless, it is good experience for you and the experience will benefit you in the long run.

If you learn anything from this, remember to judge a woman not by what she says but by her actions.

Furthermore, when you judge a woman by her actions, remember that negative signs are more reliable than positive signs:

Originally posted by Anti-Dump High Interest signs are generally not reliable.

Women have too many emotions going at the same time. They are happy right now, then unhappy five minutes from now.

A woman could appear happy, when, in fact, she is faking it so she doesn't lose you.

LOW interest signs are generally more reliable.

A woman SAYS she loves you but doesn't want sex that often. Which are you going to believe?
The LOVE statement, or the NO SEX info?

I go with the negative. Negative signs are much more reliable.

Anti-Dump says: It it's NEGATIVE, it's probably true. But keep it to yourself until you collect more evidence.

AD

http://www.sosuave.net/forum/showthread.php?threadid=18343&perpage=20&highlight=negative&pagenumber=1

Maximus_Decimus

 

[rgeere]

Originally posted by Don_Joffe
And yes he made a mistake otherwise he would have her?

It's easy for Jariel to blame himself and his actions for things, but the mistake he made was by putting his trust into a woman that couldn't return the favor back to him. It was self-sabatoge.

As far as weakness goes, it is unreasonable to think that you should play games all your life to avoid getting hurt and exposing weaknesses. That's why a man needs to find a girl that isn't going to take advantage of him in a weak moment, because whether you will admit it or not everyone has weak moments of some sort. Whether or not those weaknesses cause you to get hurt or not depends on who you surround yourself with, not by playing games to isolate and demoralize the specific parts of a person for your own benefit.

 

[Don_Joffe]

rgeere: You become weak or you have weak moments when you not in control of yourself. You obviously dont have full control of yourself, before I started learning I had my weak moments but now that I have learnt, you should NEVER have one.

Jariel made that mistake by trusting her, how can you trust a girl? I had a girlfriend for 11 months and we really liked eachother but damn I trusted her, but I didnt put my ENTIRE trust license into her.

And how is a man ment to find a woman if he doesnt start off by playing games, the minute you approach a girl that could be classified as you playing a game. Think about it, their is nothing natural about it. rgeere, you trying to live in a world of fantasies and fairy tales, its not happening. Welcome to the real world.

 

[Tkman]

I will repeat my post again:

Originally posted by Tkman
no one likes a weak person.

....

REALITY CHECK:

If you were ****y/arrogant/ignoring/******* like me, she would be in love with you !!!

 

[rgeere]

Originally posted by Don_Joffe
rgeere: You become weak or you have weak moments when you not in control of yourself. You obviously dont have full control of yourself, before I started learning I had my weak moments but now that I have learnt, you should NEVER have one.

When I was speaking of being weak, I wasn't speaking of gullibility. There is a difference between someone who has no clue when trust and someone who accepts that they have both strength weaknesses and does what he/she can to maximize their strength and minimize their weaknesses. And that means seeking out a female companion that is generally good and complements you in these aspects. They are rare, but they do exist.

Jariel made that mistake by trusting her, how can you trust a girl? I had a girlfriend for 11 months and we really liked eachother but damn I trusted her, but I didnt put my ENTIRE trust license into her.

I never said a person should ...

And how is a man ment to find a woman if he doesnt start off by playing games, the minute you approach a girl that could be classified as you playing a game. Think about it, their is nothing natural about it. rgeere, you trying to live in a world of fantasies and fairy tales, its not happening. Welcome to the real world.

I live in the real world, and I am not at all surprised that you feel this way because that is the way this world has caused people to behave. However, it is not the way this world was intended to be like, nor does it have to be that way. Good people are the ones who realize that they don't have to behave the way the world tries to teach them to behave, which is why I seek out other good people.

However hard it is to be good in this world and still survive it is possible. And when you do find happiness, it's not the exploitative superficial kind and last a whole lot longer. Sad there are so few of us in this world.

 

[RedKnight04]

Oh well SHE missed out just say NEXT..

 

[Jariel]

BluePhoenix: No, that was a different girl who I ended up losing by being too cool. I tried to learn from that mistake and act warmer with this girl, but that failed too.

But I appreciate what has been said here.

I forgot to mention that this girl originally left her boyfriend for me and now she realises she wants him back. Even though it was her decision, I think she resents me for their breakup.

This situation has happened before, when she told me she wasn't over her ex- but it was just a mood swing and she apologised and came running back to me.

I just text her back telling her there's no hard feelings and I'm going to pull the indifference game on her and see if it gets to her. I've done it before and it sent her crazy and though I don't want this b1tch back, it would be nice to see her regret her behaviour.

 

[Jariel]

REALITY CHECK:

If you were ****y/arrogant/ignoring/******* like me, she would be in love with you !!! [/B]

I was all those things (except the censored word), even ignoring her from time to time, but I let my guard down when I thought things were getting serious, and SHE was the one who let me think that.

 

[Chemistry]

Welcome to the reality of it all... I'm surprised this is your first encounter with such actions

LOL @ the fear of intimacy BS...

You wouldn't give a person off the street whom you initiated a convo with an envelope of £10,000 and ask him to mind it until you return in an hour... yet you would happily put your trust in what is basically a complete unknown simply because she is a woman... I would suggest an alignment of the second scenario with the first... trust is a valuable commodity which has to be earnt, it shouldn't simply be banded about

 

[Jariel]

Ashley: The thing is I've known this girl for a year, we were friends for 3 months and together for over a month so it wasn't like trusting a stranger.

The fear of intimacy wasn't BS. She had never had sex with anyone except her last boyfriend, she confessed she was afraid and that's probably a big reason she was reluctant to move on.