Is a "phone number" worth anything?

[squirrels]

It seems like a lot of the success of DJs on this board is measured by whether or not they get the phone number. To me, the number is just a trophy to show your friends...it doesn't mean ANYTHING. It's easy for a girl to:

-give you a fake number
-give you a number but never answer your calls
-give you a number and answer your calls, but never see you again.
-etc

You hear all kinds of field reports about people getting the phone number, but rarely do you hear what's REALLY important...the follow-up. What you DO with the phone number.

It's just one of those things that bothers me, I guess.

 

[dontmindme]

Yeah, I tend to agree. I think a success is really truly a success only after being able to make a 2nd date.

But, in terms of improvement, I think it's good if you go from getting 0 numbers to 15 numbers. At least you have some sort of options to work with.

 

[Player_Supreme]

1. the phone number or email address is only a step in the process of seduction.
2. the end result is getting the punany...by any means ...uhh never mind.
3. the ultimate end goal being she becomes into just YOU! When thought of you occupy her little brain:

"Ø i thought about you so many times this weekend and wanted to call........but didn't
> i heard that song that you love so much live on the radion the other day.......the one
> sung by a woman about her man.......being the love maker.....baby conceiver........i can't
> remember anything else.......it's heather handley ?sp........she is wonderfyul.....
> i'm gonna have to go get the cd.....do you know what i'm talking about?I

************

Oh the song is called He Is: go to ***** and download it. It's pimpjuice for a womans mind. I played it for this one and you can see the results...

He is:

Mind injector
Heart protector
Sole defender of anything I feel
Baby conceiver
Make me a believer
Joy bringer
Love giver
Doe increaser
The pleasure releaser
The night school teacher
The good life preacher
The care taker
The kiss craver

You can see why an egomainiac like me would be attracted to a woman singing these words about her man.

 

[Player_Supreme]

> sung by a woman about her man.......being the love maker.....baby conceiver........i can't
> remember anything else.......

Notice her words fellas...love maker...baby conciever...do you guys need any more proof that women are biological machines...I've read that they can even smell who they want to mate with as compatable or not!

This woman is a medical doctor. But she is still a woman. I don't care what her academic training is in...her responses will still be as a woman...take note iggster!

 

[bugsquish]

Getting the phone number may not be a one way trip to getting laid... But it's a very important step! Not getting it definetely leads to nowhere.

 

[squirrels]

Originally posted by bugsquish
Getting the phone number may not be a one way trip to getting laid... But it's a very important step! Not getting it definetely leads to nowhere.

This I am not so sure of. It seems as though most hook-ups occur on circumstances other than "he calls, she calls" BS.

For example, you hook up with a girl the first night you meet her, or you meet her through a friend of a friend and then see her at a party, or she comes by your house for whatever reason and bam, or you see her at the club, then somewhere else, and then somewhere else, and you end up getting somewhere.

I've never seen anyone have luck getting a number and then calling a girl...does that crap actually work? It seems so scripted and boring.

I got a number on Friday, and I honestly am sitting here thinking about how much of a CHORE it is to call and try to PLAN a DATE...and I honestly don't even know if I want to call any more. It's NO FUN. It's boring, and socially rigid, and completely asexual.

I can't figure out how it's possible to be unique and challenging and non-AFC when calling a girl. It's pretty much a prime example of supplication, making that phone call.

I know some of you talk about injecting humor into the call (call up and say soemthing dumb or whatever), but in the end, you're still calling up to kiss her ass in the hopes that she'll come out with you. How can you approach CALLING HER from the standpoint that YOU are the catch and SHE should be chasing YOU??

It feels so right when I first meet women, but then it feels so ridiculously stupid to be calling them up and trying to set up dates. It seems counter-intuitive and counter-productive to the eventual goal.

 

[bugsquish]

Originally posted by squirrels
This I am not so sure of. It seems as though most hook-ups occur on circumstances other than "he calls, she calls" BS.

For example, you hook up with a girl the first night you meet her, or you meet her through a friend of a friend and then see her at a party, or she comes by your house for whatever reason and bam, or you see her at the club, then somewhere else, and then somewhere else, and you end up getting somewhere.

I've never seen anyone have luck getting a number and then calling a girl...does that crap actually work? It seems so scripted and boring.

I got a number on Friday, and I honestly am sitting here thinking about how much of a CHORE it is to call and try to PLAN a DATE...and I honestly don't even know if I want to call any more. It's NO FUN. It's boring, and socially rigid, and completely asexual.

I can't figure out how it's possible to be unique and challenging and non-AFC when calling a girl. It's pretty much a prime example of supplication, making that phone call.

I know some of you talk about injecting humor into the call (call up and say soemthing dumb or whatever), but in the end, you're still calling up to kiss her ass in the hopes that she'll come out with you. How can you approach CALLING HER from the standpoint that YOU are the catch and SHE should be chasing YOU??

It feels so right when I first meet women, but then it feels so ridiculously stupid to be calling them up and trying to set up dates. It seems counter-intuitive and counter-productive to the eventual goal.

I hear you on the repeated chance meetings issue. I'm sure that's a much more natural way to get hooked up with a girl. And probably more effective. But then, leaving things to chance doesn't seem like the way of the DJ.

Calling the girl isn't supplication, it's taking your life into your own hands. It's confidently stating to the chick that you're not intimidated by her. You're gonna make her day by offering her a chance to spend some time with you.

Don't think about being the catch or who is chasing who (honestly I think some advice on this site overcomplicates things way too much) just have fun with it and flirt as you would face to face.

Your post, and your reasons not to call, seem like another attempt at masking your fear. It's not that bad. Go call her.

 

[squirrels]

I probably will...but I'm wondering how I'm supposed to hide the fact that I have ABSOLUTELY NOTHING to say to her.

 

[BobbDobbs]

Originally posted by squirrels
To me, the number is just a trophy to show your friends...it doesn't mean ANYTHING.

It doesn't mean everything, but it does mean something. Foremost it means you had the balls to go up and ask for it. Score a point for your confidence and courage facing down social rejection.

 

[bugsquish]

Originally posted by squirrels
I probably will...but I'm wondering how I'm supposed to hide the fact that I have ABSOLUTELY NOTHING to say to her.

Bwahahahahaha! Bullsh!t

You're one of the most intelligent & frequent posters on here. I'm sure you got opinions on other stuff too. You got LOTS to say. And you know it. Maybe you just need to keep calling girls until you feel more comfortable.

I always start with "Hey there babe, how's life been treating you?" If I relax, and pay attention, that simple question can keep me going for a whole 8.5 mins. Then I set up the date and say goodbye.

Just remember to get off the phone before 9 mins and 59 seconds or it's all for naught!

 

[BobbDobbs]

Originally posted by squirrels
I can't figure out how it's possible to be unique and challenging and non-AFC when calling a girl. It's pretty much a prime example of supplication, making that phone call.

You have what sounds like "disabled will." Pilinski briefly touches on it (and refers to the book where he read about it) in the e-book, "Without Embarrassment" ($25 over at www.highstatusmale.com).

You've divided your world into two extremes -- either you are above it all, god like, or you are a miserable loser.

Thus you are paralized into inaction. To not act is to absolve yourself of getting dirty in the lowly pursuits of losers. Since outcomes are either perfect and god like, or imperfect and loserville, inaction is the best choice.

Straining my memory, I think the original author's name was John Bradshaw, and his book was something about shame. Can't remember the title, though.

 

[bugsquish]

Originally posted by BobbDobbs
You have what sounds like "disabled will." Pilinski briefly touches on it (and refers to the book where he read about it) in the e-book, "Without Embarrassment" ($25 over at www.highstatusmale.com).

You've divided your world into two extremes -- either you are above it all, god like, or you are a miserable loser.

Thus you are paralized into inaction. To not act is to absolve yourself of getting dirty in the lowly pursuits of losers. Since outcomes are either perfect and god like, or imperfect and loserville, inaction is the best choice.

Straining my memory, I think the original author's name was John Bradshaw, and his book was something about shame. Can't remember the title, though.

Sounds like that sh!t affects me me too to an extent. Could be an interesting read...

 

[MisterAl]

Squirrels, no, you're smarter than that. Even if you really do have nothing to say then there's less temptation to drag out the phonecall.

You know, after a while you'll realize that you hardly even have to plan the first date. I use the same couple of cheap first date ideas on all of them. Then the first phonecall is just the basics of "when" and "where do I pick you up?"

As far as the other stuff goes, you are the catch and you are calling to offer her the chance to meet you for a little while to get to know you. You'll be unique by not boring her to death and getting your ass off the phone right after you've made plans with her.

Good luck, I hope you call her tonight.

 

[squirrels]

I called...at first she didn't remember me, then we got disconnected, and she tells me "her phone has no reception" and she wants to call me back "after her show is over."

I didn't know any way I could tell her to go f--k herself and still be fair, after all, I WAS calling her at halftime. So I gave her an "ooookay", in that tone that says, "I hope you know what's at stake for you here."

It's 10 minutes after the hour and she still hasn't called back.

I rest my case...a phone number means precisely D!CK.

Phone numbers, dating, all that crap is just that: crap. A phone number is nothing but an open-ended rejection...just in case she gets bored/lonely and changes her mind by the time you call.

 

[SamePendo]

Change ¨dating¨ and ¨phone numbers¨ and put ¨girls¨

 

[MisterAl]

I'm sorry squirrels, she was a b!tch. Well, I guess throw out _that_ number! Just think of the huge favor she just did for you. You didn't have to spend a dime on her to find out she is on the rag 24/7.

The phone number is still just an opportunity, for you _and_ her. She just decided wrongly to pass up on hers. You never know until you punch in the digits and try.

 

[squirrels]

Originally posted by MisterAl
I'm sorry squirrels, she was a b!tch. Well, I guess throw out _that_ number! Just think of the huge favor she just did for you. You didn't have to spend a dime on her to find out she is on the rag 24/7.

The phone number is still just an opportunity, for you _and_ her. She just decided wrongly to pass up on hers. You never know until you punch in the digits and try.

I wouldn't say "on the rag", just "dumb." The point is if I had f-closed that night, or seen her again in person, I could probably turn her on enough to get in her pants. As soon as it goes to the phone, it's over.

The thing that makes me angry is when girls SAY they'll call and DON'T. Don't f'ing tell me that you're going to call on x day or at x time and then NOT CALL.

If you don't intend to call, an ambiguous "I'll call you back sometime" would be fine.

Honestly, I've probably called three of the 6 or 7 numbers I've gotten recently...EVERY ONE, the SAME SH!T happened. As much as they gab and gab on the phone, women know nothing of phone ettiquette.

Or maybe it's just something I'M saying/doing...maybe a lot of things. I'm just sick and tired of meeting girls and getting freaky with them in person, and then having everything fall to dust as soon as it goes to the phone.

How many times have you guys actually gotten a number from a girl, and CALLED her, and it's actually WORKED OUT? I'm not talking about a friend who you saw a few times...I'm talking about meeting a girl for the first time, getting the number, and calling. Has it EVER worked?

I'll tell you what...next time I'm on the phone with a girl and she does ANYTHING not to my liking, she's gonna get, "Never mind. I'll catch you later. *click*". No explanations, no excuses, no nothing. Just *click*. I'm tired of women acting like morons and jerking me around over the phone.

I honestly don't know what it is...maybe it's just me, I'm not giving them a reason to want to talk to me or something. I mean, is it MY fault? I try to look at it like, "I keep giving women chances, and they keep failing to impress me." Maybe it's my failure to show value. But then why are they so up on me in person? And why do they give the number in the FIRST place?

I'm at an impasse...I'm wondering why I even ATTEMPT to waste my time with these critters. Is the sex really worth it? Is it even attainable?

 

[Eyecandie4ya]

Squirrels, keep letting your frustration out for this healthy for ya.

I can relate to what you are saying and it can make you wonder "why" about anything in regards to woman. My advice to you is understand the game and not the women because you will end up with a f**king headache trying. Just keep that low tolerance for BS when dealing with these beautiful, conniving creatures. The things that you get it happens to everyone but they way they handle it you can use to ease your frustration.

I don't know what age you are but you might want to try older chicks who are thirsting for stimulation conversation. Even some older women are conniving but not like younger women who feel like they have all the choices in the world. Reality sets in to a woman when she older because she can't be picky like the young females.

How many times have heard a older woman say "I use to have a lot of men coming after me". This stop with them and they don't understand why because the women have everything but a man. So don't let this frustrate too bad because you are male and I say we have it easy when it comes to dating

Sorry for posting a long one, but the brotha need some comfort.

 

[squirrels]

I can't see that...you're asking me to respond to not getting women by lowering my standards in women. That's not going to help my game.

I don't WANT older women...I want women my own age: 21-25. I have stimulating conversation with my male friends. I want to get laid.

I know other DJs have little to no trouble hooking up with women in that age group...even if it DOES go to the phone. There's some kind of hiccup in my game where I'm doing great on the first meeting, but I'm blowing something in the phone call...or else I'm not displaying enough value, or SOMETHING. I jsut don't know.

Thus this thread I just started: http://www.sosuave.com/vBulletin/showthread.php?threadid=36799

I'm not going to respond to this by pursuing the women I DON'T want. I need to figure out where the hole in my game is and plug it. But it doesn't help just having them "flake out" without any indicator of why...I know there's a problem, but I don't understand what, or see any signs of it.

 

[Eyecandie4ya]

Originally posted by squirrels
I can't see that...you're asking me to respond to not getting women by lowering my standards in women. That's not going to help my game.

I don't WANT older women...I want women my own age: 21-25. I have stimulating conversation with my male friends. I want to get laid.

I know other DJs have little to no trouble hooking up with women in that age group...even if it DOES go to the phone. There's some kind of hiccup in my game where I'm doing great on the first meeting, but I'm blowing something in the phone call...or else I'm not displaying enough value, or SOMETHING. I jsut don't know.

Thus this thread I just started: http://www.sosuave.com/vBulletin/showthread.php?threadid=36799

I'm not going to respond to this by pursuing the women I DON'T want. I need to figure out where the hole in my game is and plug it. But it doesn't help just having them "flake out" without any indicator of why...I know there's a problem, but I don't understand what, or see any signs of it.

Do as you may. I don't think that older women are lower standards. I just know how young women are with their mindframe and if you can deal with it, more power to ya. Just understand the game my friend.

Peace