Intorversion - (SERIOUSLY) help me make it a plus to get women!

[sexxyback]

you don't have to explain yourself to anyone, let alone any drunk biatches.

 

[Babnik]

you don't have to explain yourself to anyone, let alone any drunk biatches.

Thats very wrong attitude because sometimes they try to start a conversation!!!!

Sometimes they give me a tone of "Why aren't you with the rest? Retarded?" and then I ignore them but sometimes they use it to get close to me.

Explaining what introvert means is just boring and not a good opening conversations.

I can't think of anything to say besides "I just like to chill by myself sometimes"

 

[sexxyback]

I guess you are right.

I get that a lot - 'why are you so quiet?' 'you look sad?' 'what's wrong?'

Yeah I can't find a good answer for that, that won't sound like I'm trying to make excuses.

 

[rocco]

just be like james bond. and say, "i'm waiting for a friend."

 

[Babnik]

Maybe "Letting my mind rest a little bit"


Jesus Christ... my doctor prescribed me hydrocodone for my throat pain and to stop coughing... its freaking Vicodin.... the world is a beautiful place right now!

 

[sexxyback]

'letting my mind rest a bit' won't work. sounds like you have psych problems or something.

 

[TillTheEndOfTime]

'letting my mind rest a bit' won't work. sounds like you have psych problems or something.

1) I'm tired
2) Not feeling well
3) I have a headache
4) Pretend like you're fumbling through your pcokets and say something like "I'm trying to remember where I put my _____" (i.e. mp3 player, ID, usb key/memory stick, camera, etc)

How about one of those for deflecting that question?

 

[Babnik]

'letting my mind rest a bit' won't work. sounds like you have psych problems or something.

Well, help me out then. How about "Waiting for you to stop by and talk to me"

 

[sexxyback]

That sounds cool. 'Thinking of how I can kiss you' or something like that, turn it into a pickup thing.

I have the same problem as you, so I have an interest in this question.

 

[Babnik]

1) I'm tired
2) Not feeling well
3) I have a headache
4) Pretend like you're fumbling through your pcokets and say something like "I'm trying to remember where I put my _____" (i.e. mp3 player, ID, usb key/memory stick, camera, etc)

How about one of those for deflecting that question?

Very negative... except for the last one. But when I sit down, I sit down for 15 minutes or so.

 

[THE_ADDMAN]

I'm quite introverted myself. a lot of times I dont see the need for excessive socialization. my best buddy is VERY extroverted, and he ends up putting his foot in his mouth very often because he is impulsive, attention-seeking, and doesnt think before he talks.

an Introverts tendency to think BEFORE they talk can be a great advantage. go for quality, not quantity of words. and on a date, do something that doesnt require much talking, like an action date, movie, or games.



On a personal note, I AM working at becoming more social, but I also enjoy quiet time alone to reflect and unwind

 

[Babnik]

bump!

Still concerned about the reply to "Why are you alone? Why are you sad?"

What do I tell my FRIENDS? I would be in a bar and all of a sudden "Dude, are you OK man? You don't look like you are having a good time!" and I am!

 

[Latinoman]

This is perfect what you said. Introverts have to WORK at social events, while extroverts ENJOY social events and get energy boost from them. Introverts use up their powers during social events.

For the same token, Extroverts have to work harder when dealing with their partner in a one-on-one situation as every intimate relationship must have.

Here is the thing...an "extrovert" type personallity might get you noticed in a social event by some women. But an "introverted" type personallity (please, do NOT confuse this with shyness) might get that same woman, once she gets to know you, interested for a longer period of time.

My point is...BOTH have trade off. One is not better than the other.

 

[Latinoman]

Thats very wrong attitude because sometimes they try to start a conversation!!!!

Sometimes they give me a tone of "Why aren't you with the rest? Retarded?" and then I ignore them but sometimes they use it to get close to me.

Explaining what introvert means is just boring and not a good opening conversations.

I can't think of anything to say besides "I just like to chill by myself sometimes"

You don't have to explain anything about your personallity.

Simply work on your mannerisms...so they look confident and collective and calm.

 

[Latinoman]

1) I'm tired
2) Not feeling well
3) I have a headache
4) Pretend like you're fumbling through your pcokets and say something like "I'm trying to remember where I put my _____" (i.e. mp3 player, ID, usb key/memory stick, camera, etc)

How about one of those for deflecting that question?

Bad approach. Sending negativity is not a good approach.

What about? "Hey, I'm good..." and then continue with the conversation.

 

[TillTheEndOfTime]

bump!

Still concerned about the reply to "Why are you alone? Why are you sad?"

What do I tell my FRIENDS? I would be in a bar and all of a sudden "Dude, are you OK man? You don't look like you are having a good time!" and I am!

If this situation is a constant problem, I don't think introversion is even the real issue here. It is either one of two things: your friends are "too social" or you're a little anti-social at times. Personally, I am laid back, but still social. So if my friends were party animals, there would be a clash because I just can't be as enthusiastic as a party animal, it is not in me to do it.

Something doesn't seem right if your friends have to ask you that question so much. Can you give more details/examples?

 

[Latinoman]

bump!

Still concerned about the reply to "Why are you alone? Why are you sad?"

What do I tell my FRIENDS? I would be in a bar and all of a sudden "Dude, are you OK man? You don't look like you are having a good time!" and I am!

Don't worry about explaining yourself...as you are now sounding VERY insecure.

The fact that women are approaching you when you are "alone" is a PLUS. Do you realize how many of these guys that post in here would give ANYTHING to have at least one woman approach them in life?

And you are concerned about some canned answer to your "predicament"? This is unreal!

What about simply working on your mannerisms and once that one or two women approach you (note: from a group, now they are only one or two which put them in YOUR element...YOUR advantage), then instead of giving them an explanation or some cheesy canned answer...why not simply smile and change to topic?

Woman: "Why are you doing alone? You look so sad?"
You: {Smile} "Hi. Sad?" {laugh} "Hey, ain't you a friend of ____?" (or "Don't you work with/in ____?")


If you smile when a woman approach you...you can rest assure that they will NEVER ask you if you are sad. If you stand with confidence...you can rest assure that if the approach you is because they want to strike conversation with you.

I mean...how many time a man approaches a woman as ask her the same STUPID question? "Why are you so alone?" or "Why are you so sad?"

 

[Latinoman]

If this situation is a constant problem, I don't think introversion is even the real issue here. It is either one of two things: your friends are "too social" or you're a little anti-social at times. Personally, I am laid back, but still social. So if my friends were party animals, there would be a clash because I just can't be as enthusiastic as a party animal, it is not in me to do it.

Something doesn't seem right if your friends have to ask you that question so much. Can you give more details/examples?

I agree.

And it might have to be with body language. That's my guess. A body language of a young man going through depression.

Using movies as an example. James Bond sits in a Casino. Does he look like a person that is talking to a bunch of people, etc? Nope. Typically the "bad" guy is the extroverted one. James Bond tends to be quite and observant and low profile and calm and collective. He draws attention, because his body language (and looks) as well as his masculinity brings that on him.

Now...he is an introverted. But he is a very good one as he is great seducing women in a ONE-on-ONE situation.

 

[selfmademob]

That introversion article describes me well. I am very good in one on one situations, but I am not one from small talk. and the other day this guy that works with me thats been here for like 2 weeks, he came up to me and said "you're a deep thinking brother", and I'm just like "glad you noticed"

 

[Babnik]

If this situation is a constant problem, I don't think introversion is even the real issue here. It is either one of two things: your friends are "too social" or you're a little anti-social at times. Personally, I am laid back, but still social. So if my friends were party animals, there would be a clash because I just can't be as enthusiastic as a party animal, it is not in me to do it.

Something doesn't seem right if your friends have to ask you that question so much. Can you give more details/examples?

We are in a bar. I start talking for myabe 15 minutes, getting to knew guys and girls, interesting conversation. Someone else picks up the conversations an dI stand listening and slowly enter my own thoughts and brain and sit down and just think about things. Because I am not standing like the rest and talking NON-STOP - I look a bit out of place and sad (just neutral facial expression).