Inner Game

[SinJester]

We all know how important it is. The problem most of us face is working out how to achieve it. So, please post here you own experiances, opinions, beliefs and techniques reguading the prestegous inner game. I have my own beliefs and ways that I am working on my inner game, but before I share I would like to see what other people have to say. I searched far and wide for solid written material and found a lot of it fell short when it came to giving practical ways to boost core confidence etc, and that most articles simply gave a short boost of inspiration or some interesting tips. So here I want to help compile a resource for men on to improve their 'inner game' and become as strong as they can be.

Please share for the improvment of everyone

 

[PrinceBeavis]

Well, it's pretty much an individual process, but there are some basics. The rest is really up to you and me.

Things like,

Get in shape
Get sober, and/or otherwise get in control of oneself
Get education or training
Get and job/career/business
Take reasonable care of your appearance (hopefully without going 'metro')
Get out of debt
Take reasonable care of your surroundings (have a decent place to live that you can bring a female to....same goes for a car)
Be a man of your word
Be emotionally mature, etc.
Get a life...do things...have friends...hobbies....interests.
Do the right thing, consistently
etc.

Myself, I'm really feeling the need to get into daily meditation.

 

[SinJester]

My Views On Inner Game

The best thing for me in reguards to inner game was The Bluepring Decoded which I just made a thread about (either of those links take you to it).

PrinceBeavis I don't think many of those things really have to do with inner game. I agree that people should do that, but most of it is just improving your life's situation. Believe it or not someone could have all that and still be miserable.

Well you might think what is inner game? In my opinion it is all things to do with the mind: core confidence, discipline, a strong reality, peace, indifference to what people think of you, boldness, maculinity, emotional strength and everything along those lines. Improving your life situation is GREAT. However imagine if you go somewhere where no one knows you, will you still be as confident? Having that ability is 'core confidence', meaning a deep confidence in who you are.

I don't think that inner game is all about sitting in your room meditating and reading self-help books. One of the best ways to improve it is to take action and to get out there in difficult situations so you can discover more about yourself. However I have also been starting meditation and hypnosis. It is great for observing the thought in your mind and the feeling and emotions in your body. From there you can learn better ways to control and influence them.

My belief is that if you have inner game, you will natrually exibit qualities that are attractive to women. You don't need all of those external things to have confidence. Sure, they are great, but not neccesary. Society just wants you to think that way so that you buy stuff, otherwise it would collapse!

I've tried Hypnotica's Ultimate Inner Game and took some things from that, but need to re-watch. Really is just some NLP tricks. Going through his collection of confidence now. I want to get David D's Deep inner Game as it comes very highly rated. However untill then I am reading the power of now, practising meditation and controlling my thoughts. I am also exploring myself socially. Everyone is different, as PrinceBeavis suggests.

 

[michaelg]

Ive been strugglin with that for... well the whole time since i started. That time, i just tried to shift beliefs by rethinking, rethinking, rethinking, rethinking but didnt work.. so I even relapsed some time, guess gonna relaps again.

These days im back at basics as well, with hypnotica and dd, i really watch and appreciate it, affects me much more than readin that stuff, i never really liked the style in written. maybe I should try RSD videos as well, sounds good what Sinjester wrote..) i read some pages of sth named rsd blueprint, cant remember, but that didnt get me.
Very important is just having positive aims, not dreams or illusions. ..if they are dreams for u, consider u got power, abilities! And dont forget the work u gonna need as well, and start!

For now im just stuck with time, so many important undone stuff.. okay i know than i shouldnt be out on this board, thats right. thinking of the last ten month my social life and that with woman, well, its like one phase of a sine curve, now a bit down below zero, whereever, i got make a straigt line to the top out of that... surrender aint no option.

 

[Interceptor]

The strongest sign of maturity and self confidence is how you respond to ambivalence.

Often FEAR is THE scariest thing we have, not the actual event or circumstance we fear. The feeling of FEAR is the scariest thing.


Doing Inner Game work is expected of you. It is part of life.



Be UNReactive, NOT UNResponsive in dificult emotional situations.


IF the eyes are the window to your soul, and you avoid eye contact, what do you fear communicating about yourself to others?


If you find yourself wanting to get a 'reaction' from a woman, take it as a sign that you've gone of the deep end. You are no longer in control of yourself.


Dont' 'SWIM" in your Emotions. Let your emotions "swim" in you.


When you meet her eyes....let her burn in them. Accept the sexual tension, and dont try to escape it. Let HER be the first one to turn away, or stay with you.



Stop running away from your emotions. OWN them, FEEL them, Embrace them, and then kindly put them in their place.



When a woman talks to you in the initial phases of attraction/seduction, ,most of what she is saying can be distilled in these simple things

Are you afraid of life?

are you able to take me?

Do you know where youre going?

Are you afraid of me?

Will you stay with me emotionally and physically?

Do YOU know who YOU are?


If you spend the time to deal with your issues and less running away from them , you may find out that theyre really not as bad as you thought


Be dependent on the validation from things inside you which do NOT Change, be INDEPENDENT of the validation of things outside you that DO.


Self Esteem is not the same as Ego. Beware the Ego. The ego will get you killed trying to protect it.


Everything you were ever afraid of is the EXACT thing you should be working on MASTERING this lifetime.

Afraid of girls?
Guess what? a lot of them are afraid of you too...

Dont want to be 'hurt' again??
Guess what? a Lot of women dont want to be hurt again either.



If you go up to a girl and start showing her what kind of job you have , what kind of car you drive, and what kind of cool people you know, youll end up attracting the same version of you in a female.
A golddigger dont make a good housewife, so put the ring through your nose and pay up, chump...

There are two types of males in this world;
those who know how male/female attraction works, and those who still want to take a girl to a nice restautrant and buy her things on the first date.

Every time you make the Decision to AVOID GROWTH, thus, avoiding building your Self Esteem........you kill yourself a little more.....




Women KNOW that when you go talk to her, it means youre attracted, so be the man and embrace your Desires for her. Dont be so ashamed of it. She wants to feel yourdesire for her.This is part of her feeling Femenine and sexy.
When you aact embarassed or ashamed of displaying your attraction to her, she will be disappointed. and confused.



Leanr how to ADMIT to yourself and understand it is OK to be sexaully attracted to a woman and talk to her.


Dont be a slave to your desires.



If SEX from her is YOUR Number One Priority, then you will always be second best.


If Sex from her is not your number one priority, then she can never control you,thus making you that much more attractive to her...



Beware of Manly Females. They still havent made peace with their femeninity, so dont be her b*tch.

 

[reset]

Afraid of girls?
Guess what? a lot of them are afraid of you too...

Dont want to be 'hurt' again??
Guess what? a Lot of women dont want to be hurt again either.

This has been tough for me but I'm starting to see this. Being brainwashed you assume the girl is perfect and totally in control, after all, she's the reason for your existence, as a god she has super-natural powers.

But apparently they are just people and much of the confidence is an act. Go figure. This hasn't completely sunk in. Every time I think of this it still blows me away.

 

[Interceptor]

Because both men and women have been conditioned that either "MEN HAVE ALL THE POWER." or "WOMEN HAVE ALL THE POWER."


truth is, EVERYONE has ALL THE POWER.


Some just need to recognize it and discover it

And the most important one to understand for oneself:

NO ONE HAS TRUE POWER OVER ME


(except yourself...)

 

[reset]

truth is, EVERYONE has ALL THE POWER.

Yup. And that's a loaded phrase. I think many would rather not have all the power. Too much responsibility.

 

[Alphamale1821]

For me inner game is all about finding yourself. Realize what you want in life and what you have to offer yourself. I started out by realizing what i have to offer and from their i made of list of improvement keys which have helped me to develop a since of strong inner game in myself.

I can literally say anything to anyone and be totally unaffected by the words actions or outcome of the social interaction. I have become fearless in that regards. Here is my list of self improvement keys for inner game, which have become internalized in who i am.

Keys for Self improvement.
The mindset: I'm the prize and she has to earn my interest. I qualify her to see if she is worth my interest. If all else fail's you make a new friend ^_^
1. ALWAYS BE CONFIDENT IN EVERYTHING YOU DO.....Calm, Cool and Collected anything less is a false image.
2. Be totally unaffected by the words, actions or outcome of any social situation with a women.
3. Give no women the power to control your emotional state of mind.
4. Never react, always respond
5. Do everything possible to avoid any confrontation or argument with a women.
6. Master the art of reading body language and sub communication
7. Trust my intuition
8. ALWAYS HAVE FUN
9. Be sexual
Remember: Arguing with women is like wrestling with a pig, after a while you realize they like it.

I have slowly but surely realized more and more each day who i am. Rejection isn't something i fear because i know the more rejection i get the better my success will be. I have the potential to be the best and every day thats what i strive for. If a chick flakes i don't fret i just next, or freeze her out. They usually end up coming back, and if not i'm already on to the next chick.
Heres a short example:

I met this hot blond at a party last week, we hung out and i knew that their is was sexual attraction between. Due to her having to go home(we we're gonna spend the night together) we didn't get to fuuck. No worries i still got her number. We text a little, then she stops, next day we do the same and she stops.

I call her and say " Hey hb8 it's to bad we never got to hang out again, because honestly i wanted to fuuck your brains out and cuum on your face, oh well i'm deleting your number good bye". Later that night she calls me asking where i'm partying at. We talk but don't hang out. She is still kinda flakey. The next day I call her and doesn't pick up. Delete her number again. She then calls me randomly later asking if i just drove by.

I'm like no blah blah we hang up. More freeze out and i add her on myspace, she leaves me a comment, i freeze out and later leave her one. So while it's a game of cat and mouse i'm already on to her. I know she wants me and it's only a matter of time. I could care less if i bang her, because every day i'm meeting new chicks. I'm totally unaffected by her. I play by my own rules and it drives chicks crazy. That my friends is inner game.

 

[Interceptor]

Don't confuse feeding your mind, with feeding your SOUL.
They are not the same.

Your body retains past memories. The more profound the experience, the more ingrained it will be in your neurology.

Get rid of your current current neurology and you can become an entirely 'new' person.

 

[mfd1830]

Don't confuse feeding your mind, with feeding your SOUL.
They are not the same.

Your body retains past memories. The more profound the experience, the more ingrained it will be in your neurology.

Get rid of your current current neurology and you can become an entirely 'new' person.

how does someone go about this change? are there practical steps? because everything i've read makes sense but that doesn't actually change the way i feel or act.

 

[slaog]

Afraid of girls?
Guess what? a lot of them are afraid of you too...

Dont want to be 'hurt' again??
Guess what? a Lot of women dont want to be hurt again either

This has been tough for me but I'm starting to see this. Being brainwashed you assume the girl is perfect and totally in control, after all, she's the reason for your existence, as a god she has super-natural powers.

But apparently they are just people and much of the confidence is an act. Go figure. This hasn't completely sunk in. Every time I think of this it still blows me away.

Funny that I was thinking about this today. Seeing so many women unhappy and looking for men. I though why don't these women have many men at their fingertips.

With so many women single or unhappy it means that a men of high character are rare and so must be of great value to women.

 

[Interceptor]

how does someone go about this change? are there practical steps? because everything i've read makes sense but that doesn't actually change the way i feel or act.

Isnt your current situation and circumstance ENOUGH Motivation for change??!


In addirion, the steps needed are first

Recognizing the value of the belief

Integrating the belief


Acting on that Belief


How do we Act on it?

You use Observing Ego,


What is Observing Ego?


Your Mentoring side of your mind which will step back and objectively analyze a situation, and give you the beleif and Value you should uphold in said circumstance.


"I am strong enough to withstand any woman's sh*t test. They dont phase me."


Woman: "You arent that confident. I dont know who you think you are,or what your doing. But Im not impressed...."


( She tests your Personal Boundary, thus, enacting your Belief to present itself....)
You: (in dead serious tone and eye contact.) "Im like...so ...hurt....anyway, like I was saying ..yada yada... "


You can use Affirmations and EFT to help with these beliefs as well.
A good EFT session can really dig deep and change your neurology on past negative beliefs
http://www.innergametapping.com/
These Ideas must have recognized VALUE to you ,so that they can thne BECOME held BELIEFS for you.

ie
"I keep my Morale, my Self Esteem, and Confidence INTACT under ALL Circumstances"

This is a positive belief, it is up to you to find personal value in it, so then you can identify with it.

 

[reset]

Funny that I was thinking about this today. Seeing so many women unhappy and looking for men. I though why don't these women have many men at their fingertips.

With so many women single or unhappy it means that a men of high character are rare and so must be of great value to women.

well they do have men at their fingertips and before I thought that meant they must have good self-esteem, but that's not really the case.

Really attractive women may be so used to being praised on looks alone that they are insecure, wondering if anyone really takes them seriously.

 

[MooseGod]

I don't really think this is a one-size-fits-all solution, but I boosted my inner game about 200% during spring break just by getting away from my lame-ass roommates and ****ty apartment and working outside (helping my dad prepare a foundation for a house they're moving in) and working on my Jeep...

There's just something about working outside with your own two hands that makes you feel like a MAN again.

I think I also realized that my friends drag me down most of the time--I figured I would feel like a loser going by myself to a bar, but the first night back in town I couldn't get a hold of my wing so I went solo and had a great time (picked up a blond, blue-eyed cutie too)... Just something to think about.

 

[MooseGod]

well they do have men at their fingertips and before I thought that meant they must have good self-esteem, but that's not really the case.

Really attractive women may be so used to being praised on looks alone that they are insecure, wondering if anyone really takes them seriously.

Couldn't have said it better myself...sure, women may have more prospects at any given time than a lot of guys, but they don't want to get involved with just ANY guy. They're looking for Mr. Right, not just Mr. Right Now.

 

[reset]

speaking of observing ego

 

[slaog]

You can use Affirmations and EFT to help with these beliefs as well.
A good EFT session can really dig deep and change your neurology on past negative beliefs
http://www.innergametapping.com/
These Ideas must have recognized VALUE to you ,so that they can thne BECOME held BELIEFS for you.

ie
"I keep my Morale, my Self Esteem, and Confidence INTACT under ALL Circumstances"

This is a positive belief, it is up to you to find personal value in it, so then you can identify with it.

Does EFT work? I believe in alot of things but just don't get how the EFT tapping works.

 

[slaog]

speaking of observing ego

Thanks for the link reset. I'll check it out tomorrow.

 

[reset]

Couldn't have said it better myself...sure, women may have more prospects at any given time than a lot of guys, but they don't want to get involved with just ANY guy. They're looking for Mr. Right, not just Mr. Right Now.

I think a great side-effect of inner game, is while you are learning who you ARE, and figuring yourself out, and learning to see yourself, the good and the bad, and working from there, eventually you start to realize that everyone (including women) is human too, and they have their own issues and problems and are not perfect either. It's hard to explain. The greater awareness you have of yourself you can almost see it in others.