in the end....

[Demodulate]

another classic breakup story....

me and my girl of two months have been having problems... she gave me the I dont know what I want speach and started hanging out with her ex bf. I let it go for a week and a half... we had horrible fights about it I would try and leave her but she would call me crying and we would console and make an attempt to ptch things up.

no more.. I just told her it was over and she just hung up on me. I do want her back, but I recognise the fact that it will not work out.

honestly it hurts to do, but I am done playing games with her. I tried to be understanding and all it got me was heartache.


anywho, I just wanted to vent... thaks for listening

 

[dead_romeo]

Good for you, you did the right thing, just don't relapse and start making contact with her again.

 

[Demodulate]

how do I handel her constantly texting me asking me questions, and telling me how she hates me. shes falling apart and shes trying to blame it on me.

I wanted to be with her, I gave her every oppurtunity to do just that, but now shes blaming me for leaving her.

wtf...

 

[bp1974]

Sounds like you're doing great. Her ego is hurt as she probably imagined that she would be the one to end it, not you, so now she's trying to see if she still has any control over you.

You need to hold your ground. You made a decision and you have to stick with it, not back down just because she goes all emotional blackmail on you. If she gets the idea that what she is doing is working on you, she'll up it. You've gone with your gut by ending it, now you have to remember that. If it gets really bad, you could even tell her "I'm sorry you're hurting so much, but it wasn't working for either of us and I'm not going to change my mind."

 

[squirrels]

Originally posted by Demodulate
how do I handel her constantly texting me asking me questions, and telling me how she hates me. shes falling apart and shes trying to blame it on me.

I wanted to be with her, I gave her every oppurtunity to do just that, but now shes blaming me for leaving her.

wtf...

I'd ignore the text messaging. If she calls, just tell her what BP said. And don't answer the phone for her again.

 

[Demodulate]

gah.. she hooked me...

told me I was just like her last BF leaving her when she needed me most, telling me I fvcked her over...

I called.. now we are going to have dinner tomorrow to discuss the relationship...

 

[squirrels]

Originally posted by Demodulate
gah.. she hooked me...

told me I was just like her last BF leaving her when she needed me most, telling me I fvcked her over...

I called.. now we are going to have dinner tomorrow to discuss the relationship...

To discuss the END of the relationship. If you must have dinner, do it, but make it clear that it's over, for your good AND hers. Throw an LJBF out there, so it doesn't look like you're just giving her the shaft.

And please don't sleep with her.

 

[Halo]

she gave me the I dont know what I want speach and started hanging out with her ex bf.

I hope you keep that in mind when you have dinner with her.

She may not know what she wants, but I'll take a stab at it. She wants attention, she wants to have her ego stroked. When you told her it was over, it did not go the way she wanted. Now she is craving that attention and ego boosting, and voila, wants to have dinner with you.

Your call. I'd next her though. If she had good IL she never would've given the "don't know what I want" speech.

 

[Demodulate]

I honestly dont want to get rid of her, but I know its going that way... the only problem is when I try and break up with her she flips out, says that im leaving her when she needs me most. she is going through a rough time right now. she was in the ER this past weekend, and she is looking like she is going to need surgery and will loose an ovary.

I went to miami clubing with friends while she sat in the ER. that was friday and saturday.

when I tried to leave her I got a million questions.. is there someone else, dont you want to be with me. I answerd no to the first, but anything I could be ambigous with I answerd with I dont know, throwing that back in her face.

she told me she hated me. then she couldnt be without me, then she would cry and ask how I could be so cold. I agreed to dinner to discuss the relationship.

now what the hell do I do... I dont want to be the bad guy, I do want to work it out, but im done playing these stupid mind games.

 

[squirrels]

What you have on your hands is a boat-load of drama.

If you DID succeed in making this work, you will have earned yourself a big sack o' misery.

Don't "try to make it work." Some things weren't meant to work, and trying to force them into working is going to do nothing but cause a lot of damage.

 

[Demodulate]

well dinner is off...

girl got the snips...

she hates me now, and I feel like a piece of crap for doing it, but like it was said.. it was a boat load of drama......

 

[Demodulate]

Just got this email...

names have been changed.......

===========================================

since you wont give me the chance to expalin myself since that seems to be
what i do best with you, i am emailing you because i dont think its fair
that you are doing this to me. Im not gonna lie and say that ive made life
easy for you and i know ive done my share to make us fight but you did too.
i never called you names or accused you of **** i never yelled at you or
made you feel like garbage you did that to me and yet i still stayed around
to take it i still stuck around to work things out with you. the reason i
needed space wasnt all because of you and i fighting continueously it was
because i needed to take care of myself. you were giving me that and i cant
thank you enough for that. i am very sick Eric more than you know and this
is really scary for me, im sorry if you think I need Justin more than you and
Im sorry if you think there is something going on between us but the truth
of the matter is he is my best friend and he has been thru this with me
before. I feel comfortable around him when im in pain and when im throwing
up cuz hes seen it I dont want to be like that in front of you because i
want to be so perfect for you, i dont want you to worry about me and feel
sorry for me i dont want you to look at me as broken, i dont want you to
think god this girls has more problems than anyone should have, and i didnt
want to loose you over me being sick so im sorry if i go to Justin for support
because there is no chance of loosing something that you dont have, he is
only a friend and if he cant take it no big deal but if you were to walk
away i would have nothing as do I now. When I told you i meant it and i
never stopped, yeah we had alot of problems and yeah its cuz of me but its
only because you've never dated anyone like me and at one time that was a
good thing to you. you wanted to marry me you wanted me to have your
children and now you tell me to go **** myself, how is that fair? I was
willing to work it out everytime you flew off the handle and i took you back
everytime you went off on me. i never gave up on us, never once, you just
did. why because you think Justin and I are ****ing? Let me tell you something
I would never have put up with all your **** if there was a chance for him
and I. I would have gone back long ago. I am not a gold digger, never once
cared about your money, and never ever used you for anything. I loved you
for the person you were. the person that went to the doctor with me the
person who came to the hospital, the person who made me feel like a person
who deserved the world. I love you Eric and the last thing i want is to
loose you but by the sound of it I already did. I am sorry if i hurt you and
im sorry that i lost you, you are still in my heart and always will be. You
were a blessing to me and im sorry that i ruined it but i really didnt do
anything wrong. you say you dont care about me anymore well thats fine but
im here if you ever need a thing. i love you Eric more than you will ever
know. Funny George stabbed me in the chest and it hurt but being stabbed in
the back is a whole lot worse!

Love You
me
==========================================


how do I respond to this....

 

[Demodulate]

dammit.. she got me on AIM...

I tried to be hard, but I broke down and agreed to see her after work....

now what....

 

[squirrels]

DRA-MUH!!

Tell her, "I know it hurts, but I think it's for the best for both of us, and I'm standing by that decision, not just for me, but for you too. I won't forget the times we had, but the relationship is over. Please don't make this harder than it already is.

Regards,
you"

Then cut contact. Ignore E-mails, don't answer calls, etc. You've got a psycho on your hands, and if you give in now, she'll know in the back of her head, "Any time he does something I don't like, I can go psycho and get my way." So all you'll have if you go back now is a girl who will go psycho on you every time she wants something. That's just not healthy for either of you and you know it.

End it. Just end it.

 

[NoMore]

im sorry that i ruined it but i really didnt do anything wrong

That sh1t is so typical, atleast for me. I'm sick of it.

This girl has some serious problems, atleast right now. My guess is that if you continue down this path with her it will lead to your own destruction. I have seen this type of girl with my roomate, she had physical problems which led to extreme emotional problems. They split up about 6 months ago and he is still all fawked in the head from her. I think you are going to have to spend some time away from her to realize just how much BS you are putting up with. If you really want to, maintain the relationship as friends, but very far away. Not close friends. This girl is dangerous!!

 

[bp1974]

That's one f*cking manipulative email. She's good, I'll give her that. She really knows how to get to you doesn't she?

 

[Cremasta]

Agree with bp, this girl is good... but make no mistake, she is a headcase. I don't always expect women to act rationally but this girl is deep left field.

Essentially the letter is saying:
"Why don't you want me, I don't understand?

I know I have problems, but don't you understand that when I really need help, you are no use to me. I need him around more than I need you. What's the problem?

Just because I would rather spend time with someone else, doesn't mean I like them more than you.

I like having you around when things are great but you are not mature enough to handle real problems"

Am I the only one who read that here? Tell her to shove her guilt trip up her arse. This girl HAS got more problems than anyone should have and they have nothing to do with her trip to ER, its her head that needs some work.

 

[Demodulate]

wait theres more...

you might as well call me doormatt...

names changed to reflect reality...

-------------------------------------------------------------------


please tell me what the hell is going on! i am so confused one minute you want to work things out the next you are telling me its over. I want to work things out but it seems like you are so hell bent on thinking the worst of me. i told you the truth i dont lie. all the other times the **** has happened i proved you wrong so why all of a sudden would it chage. if i wanted to be with the village idiot i would just tell you that. if i wanted to go to mike’s i'd tell you that. i did what i said and im sorry you cant believe me. My mom does not want to get into our business but she is real worried about me and my health so she thinks i should just leave you alone but I dont want to, i love you I want to be with you and work it out but I dont think that you do. again im the one giving and taking and you are just dishing out names and attitude. its not fair to me to have to always take your ****. i put you thru nothing. you obviously have issues but even if you get rid of me you are still gonna have them so why not try to rid of them with me? im sorry that it has come to this but i dont know what else to say or do. i am not going to give up myself to make you happy all i can do is work things out with you if you even want to. i know the person deep down, the person that i fell in love with so where is he? what happened to you? you got worse instead of better. please Doormatt i cant take this one day together the next day not. i cant take the name calling and the yelling. my health is getting worse you know that and i just cant take it emotionally either. George did enough damage dont need anymore. you and him are so different but yet alot alike. i want to fix this do you? please let me know what the hell is up cuz i cant take this not knowing ****. i love you with all my heart and want to work this out. you know where i am- if i dont hear from you by lunch its over and i never want to see or talk to you again!

=====================================


of course I talked to her again...


I have serious trust issues... and it finally culminated in me driving to see if she was in fact home where she said she was going to be.. she wasnt.. and she just explained it aways as her being at walgreens getting some cold medicine...

I know shes lying but I cant prove it... and I cant shake her cause she pulls this **** that tugs at my hearst strings....

can someone just come tie me up and prevent me from doing this from myself....

 

[squirrels]

No, no one can. She will continue to act psycho to get what she wants from you until you stand up and be a MAN and leave her.

I understand that it's hard, but don't expect any sympathy here. We gave you advice, you agreed with it, yet you chose not to follow it and to commit yourself to a losing battle. It's on you now.

 

[thissucks003]

If you are not happy in this relationship, then why are you still in this relationship?

A)Yes

B)No

Which one is it?