In A Traditional Marriage, A Woman Don’t Need No Money

[Brother_Rapp]

MetalFortress

I agree. I also love how the only liberal argument to this is "derrr u must be insecure oll im more sufusticated then u"


I didn't get that. I'm going to need you to translate it for me.

 

[MetalFortress]

Idiotspeak for "You only feel that way because you must be insecure about you're manhood. I'm more new-times and sophisticated than you, therefore I am automatically right and you are stupid to even think differently from me."

 

[Giovanni Casanova]

Originally posted by MetalFortress
Okay, I'll argue it with logic. Ever heard of studies on mental capacity of blacks and whites? Just because the racist won't listen doesn't make the argument itself invalid.

So what is the point of the argument then? The racist isn't going to say, "Oh, so blacks and whites have the same mental capacity! I was so foolish! Time to throw away this white sheet. What was I thinking?" And all the normal people already know the racist is full of sh*t. So you're not going to be changing their minds, either. There is no logical or reasonable reason for using logic and reason with a person that dumb.

The best you can do is just tell them they are a retard in case they were not aware of it already.

 

[Giovanni Casanova]

Originally posted by Brother_Rapp
Men become a needless duplication of what these liberated bytches do. Why then do they need men?

This is the heart of your problem, right here, and is the reason why logic will never work on you. A woman with freedom and a mind of her own scares the sh*t out of you because you have nothing else to offer a woman except for the fact that you can go out and get a job. You even say yourself that if women are allowed to have jobs, then (in your mind) they have no need for a man. In your case, that's probably true.

Of course, it would be pretty damn emasculating for any man to know that he has so little to offer. Such a man would probably compensate by being a control freak. Controlling her movements, controlling her ambitions, controlling the purse strings. If that works for you and you enjoy being with some soulless shrinking violet women who has no ambition in life other than to be your maid and Living Doll™, then so be it... but to infer that means it's the best situation for everybody is, well, retarded.

That's the most time I'm going to waste on your stupidity, and it has been far too long already.

 

[Giovanni Casanova]

Originally posted by Brother_Rapp
Poll results can be interesting, but they can be interpreted in a number of ways. For one thing, the entire argument is on going.

What a wimpy-assed cop out that is. The poll went against you the first time you posted a poll on that liquid sewage you called an argument, and it has gone against you 2:1 this time too. So when it goes against you it's "open to interpretation" and "inconclusive".

But if if the poll had said that 60% of the people agreed with you, you and I both know damn well that you would wh*ring that as incontrovertible proof that everyone agrees with you.

Luckily, there are still some real men on this site who aren't so threatened by women that they need to keep her chained to a stove, barefoot and pregnant at all times, with only the small stipend that her man is gracious enough to give her.

 

[Climax]

Let me give an example...

Originally posted by Brother_Rapp
~ªêQµïTª$~

MetalFortress


A woman’s traditional part is to give the guy the power of control. A man will not care about something that doesn't belong to him. He should find a woman who is prepared to surrender power in exchange for love. Marriage is about union, two people becoming one. For women, surrender of power (her independence ergo money) is the essence of love.

If a woman can't trust a man with her money and her whole life, she doesn't love him and shouldn't marry him

Would you two gentlemen care to comment on this?

Man! In the days of today, with all the divorces etc, its in the best will of the WOMAN herself to have a job and be ABLE to earn a living WITHOUT depending fully on her husband. A marriage has NOTHING to do with "giving up control" etc, what I am saying is that a woman must have a job NOT ONLY for the sake of contributing money for both her AND her husband, but to be independent and show that she doesn’t just plan on sitting on her ass and asking for money the whole time from her husband.

You obviously get the women that will love a man properly and show him that she appreciates him working and sharing his money with her etc, but those women are very few, and very hard to find. Now u are probably thinking "well then just dont marry a woman like this", but the truth is, is that a woman will not "use" u for ur money when u 1st get married, but with a lot of women they get used to everything coming easy to them and they will end up using you, and your money, and if u wont give her any money any more, she will probably end up leaving you.

I'm saying the above because I have known guys that this has happened to, and just her "love" for u is NOT enough to contribute to the marriage, unless u want to be used for the rest of your life

No of coarse this is a generalization and not ALL women will end up using you if u LET them, but the majority of women will adapt to the "easy come" way of living, and it will lead to her using you.


Laterz...

 

[Brother_Rapp]

~ªêQµïTª$~

”Man! In the days of today, with all the divorces etc, its in the best will of the WOMAN herself to have a job and be ABLE to earn a living WITHOUT depending fully on her husband. A marriage has NOTHING to do with "giving up control" etc, what I am saying is that a woman must have a job NOT ONLY for the sake of contributing money for both her AND her husband, but to be independent and show that she doesn’t just plan on sitting on her ass and asking for money the whole time from her husband.”





This was part of a post of mine on page one.


With the onset of the decline in high paying jobs relevent to standards of living over the last quarter century, it has become necessary in a number of families that both husband and wife work (or girl friend and boy friend shacking up) in the job market. (People have to do what they have to do.) In such cases, the primary caregiver should relinquish her check to the primary breadwinner and yield to his decisions on how the money is spent. They may consult with each other, but there can only be one that has the final say.

This is the sort of thing that worries me. People just coming into the discussion might vote without reading all the posts. After all, there are a lot of them.



Let’s try this in a different direction. Why do people, generally speaking, get a divorce? What are your thoughts?

 

[Wyldfire]

So the woman doesn't "need" a couple of hundred dollars in her purse or more at any time? I guess you're going to do all the grocery shopping, school clothes shopping and Christmas Shopping for everyone, then. And of course you're going to pay all the bills, run all the errands and all things that relate to money, right?

I think you are totally clueless about the cost of things. On top of that...no one should just "turn their paycheck over" to their spouse. When both work they simply need to figure out what the bills are together and based on what they each make, figure out what percentage each needs to contribute to paying the bills. Then they should decide how much to save and whatever is left over can either be used as spending money for each person, allowances for the kids or to make a special family purchase.

During my marriage, if I had not of worked the bills would not have been paid, the kids would not have gotten school clothes or Christmas gifts. The final straw that led me to leave my ex husband was him going into my purse and taking all the money I had for bills and Easter shopping to go out and get falling down drunk, buy alcohol for him to drink at home and gave his weed peddler the $500 he owed him. When I confronted him about it he said he'd go buy Easter stuff for our 3 childen. He came back with 6 plastic eggs and 2 bags of Andes Candies...one of which he had opened and ate half of before he got home. Needless to say, I was furious. When I told him what he had gotten was unacceptable he smashed the toilet, put about 20 holes in the wall and killed the kid's finches. Then he left for work. I packed the kids up with what we could carry and went to a shelter and left the state. The shelter provided Easter baskets for my kids. My father paid for train tickets with a sleeper car and meals included for the kids and I and we came up here to start over.

There is NO WAY IN HELL that I would ever turn over my paycheck to a man and in light of my past experience I would insist on the finances being a cooperative responsibility. If the guy wanted to write the checks, that's fine, but I damn well am going to be the one that makes sure they actually get sent out or delivered to where they are supposed to.

 

[Climax]

...

Dude.... I'm not getting into another discussion... if you want to talk about "Why do people, generally speaking, get a divorce?" .... I gave u my opinion, and thats that. But all i can say, is that a divorce occurs for many MANY reasons, so i cannot give u an answer to your rather broad question without writing out a rather long reply, which i do not intend on doing.


Laterz...

 

[Brother_Rapp]

Wyldfire
“So the woman doesn't "need" a couple of hundred dollars in her purse or more at any time? I guess you're going to do all the grocery shopping, school clothes shopping and Christmas Shopping for everyone, then. And of course you're going to pay all the bills, run all the errands and all things that relate to money, right?”


Brother Rapp
The following is from page one, the first paragraph. Please take note where I say. Yes, he would be responsible for sending out all the money orders and / or checks to pay the bills. What bills he does or does not pay should not be kept a secret from the wife. She should rightfully be able to look at where the money is going. It is him that should say where it goes. He has this power with the consent of the wife. If she looses faith in his decision-making ability, she should get a divorce. If there are errands that he cannot run, he should ask and she should be willing to pitch in and do them.

All she needs is enough money to do what he tells her to do and perhaps some gas and cigarette money
A woman don’t need any money. You didn’t know that did you. If a woman has a man, she don’t need a dime. All she needs is enough money to do what he tells her to do and perhaps some gas and cigarette money. That’s it. Certainly not no two or three hundred in your purse. For what? She then starts to get away from her traditional role as the primary caregiver of the home. The guy controls all the finances. The gal does the home.

Partial post on page 2
OH MY GOODNESS!!!
I wasn't saying that at all. She just don't need no two, three hundred dollars in her pocket. The guy should determine the direction of the main money. I even said earlier that she should have cigarette money, and gas money and enough money to do as he might want her to do something. No man should want to be nickled and dimed to death. Who would want to be bothered every minute for something. I would hope that he would have enough sense to be sure she had spending money for incidentals.

Wyldfire
“I think you are totally clueless about the cost of things. On top of that...no one should just "turn their paycheck over" to their spouse. When both work they simply need to figure out what the bills are together and based on what they each make, figure out what percentage each needs to contribute to paying the bills. Then they should decide how much to save and whatever is left over can either be used as spending money for each person, allowances for the kids or to make a special family purchase.”

Brother Rapp
Partial post of mine at the bottom of page 3
If a woman can't trust a man with her money and her whole life, she doesn't love him and shouldn't marry him
Do you agree with this statement?


Wyldfire
”During my marriage, if I had not of worked the bills would not have been paid, the kids would not have gotten school clothes or Christmas gifts. The final straw that led me to leave my ex husband was him going into my purse and taking all the money I had for bills and Easter shopping to go out and get falling down drunk, buy alcohol for him to drink at home and gave his weed peddler the $500 he owed him. When I confronted him about it he said he'd go buy Easter stuff for our 3 childen. He came back with 6 plastic eggs and 2 bags of Andes Candies...one of which he had opened and ate half of before he got home. Needless to say, I was furious. When I told him what he had gotten was unacceptable he smashed the toilet, put about 20 holes in the wall and killed the kid's finches. Then he left for work. I packed the kids up with what we could carry and went to a shelter and left the state. The shelter provided Easter baskets for my kids. My father paid for train tickets with a sleeper car and meals included for the kids and I and we came up here to start over.”



Brother Rapp
You choose poorly. That doesn’t mean that my theory is wrong.

Wyldfire
“There is NO WAY IN HELL that I would ever turn over my paycheck to a man and in light of my past experience I would insist on the finances being a cooperative responsibility. If the guy wanted to write the checks, that's fine, but I damn well am going to be the one that makes sure they actually get sent out or delivered to where they are supposed to.”

Brother Rapp
Now that you’ve been burnt, you won’t ever trust a man again? All men are not like that. You once made a wrong decision. You should move pass that. Everybody makes poor decisions on a lot of things in life. That only makes you human.You are not special. You're a human being also.

 

[Brother_Rapp]

~ªêQµïTª$~
“Dude.... I'm not getting into another discussion... if you want to talk about "Why do people, generally speaking, get a divorce?" .... I gave u my opinion, and thats that. But all i can say, is that a divorce occurs for many MANY reasons, so i cannot give u an answer to your rather broad question without writing out a rather long reply, which i do not intend on doing.”


PRACTICALLY all the reasons for divorce are addressed in my main argument. Poor choice of a mate and money problems are at the top of the list. You said that there are many reasons for a divorce. I’m saying pick one. I’m in the batter’s box. Strike me out.

 

[Wyldfire]

Brother Rapp...you are going to have to find yourself a deaf, dumb and mute woman or purchase yourself a blow up doll, because the likelihood of you actually finding a woman willing to put up with the living conditions you are expecting is pretty much nil. Back when women weren't able to support themselves they really had no choice but to accept being treated like a possession instead of a partner in life. That's not the case anymore, and it's why you don't see many women wanting to live the kind of existence you are touting. Women do NOT like being treated in the way you are promoting here. If they liked and wanted that it would be the norm.

Now it's not a bad thing to be traditional in some respects, but NOT if it violates the rights of either of the two people or causes one to feel hurt or mistreated. Your obsession over control of money leads me to wonder if perhaps you are married and are having a conflict over this issue with your wife. Or perhaps she left you over the issue. I just think there is more to this broken record you're on here than meets the eye.

So tell us...WHY are you so focused on this issue?

 

[PRMoon]

Originally posted by Wyldfire
Brother Rapp...you are going to have to find yourself a deaf, dumb and mute woman or purchase yourself a blow up doll, because the likelihood of you actually finding a woman willing to put up with the living conditions you are expecting is pretty much nil.

Or create a time machine and go back to the mid 50's 60's when such things did occur...also very unlikely.

The day's of your "traditional" relationship are definately on the way out. Womens liberation has definaty driven some significant nails into that coffin. Your theory really only applies to a time long forgotten, or can only be applied to people who live very basically. Now days with everything getting exponentially more expencive (Landprices, Gas prices, Cost of children, Groceries etc etc.) you'd really have to be quite thick headed not to have your wife be more of your partner rather then some submissive person who you just toss a few bucks to so they can do basic daily activites... Unless you're STINKIN rich (also not very likely). And since your modern wife will have to be in the work place, she'll definatly have a different sense of power. With that sense of power there's very little chance they'll be willing to give up their entire check to their husband or significant other cause "it's the right thing to do". That's just stupid, i mean if you're married and you split both assets, then why can't a woman be equally involved in deciding where the money goes? It's not like the two of you are deciding which way the world should rotate, you're just paying bills. And if you have savings, then you should both decide equally what you should jointly spend the money on, because you both earned it.

Hell my soon to be girlfriend has way more money then me and probably always will. Her folks are rich and she's gonna be a lawyer, so unless I land a job as a CEO at a fourtune 500 company, there's very little chance that I'll be the number 1 source of income in our household (If things get that serious). Why should I waste time arguing with her as to why I should be making all of the decisions about where her money gets spent? Gotta face it your traditional marriage is on the extinction list and a new type of traditional marriage is coming to light.

 

[ShortTimer]

Originally posted by Brother_Rapp


If a woman can't trust a man with her money and her whole life, she doesn't love him and shouldn't marry him

Would you two gentlemen care to comment on this?

I shall comment thusly:

You're an idiot. Women aren't any fun when they act like robots. You're acting like a child and trying to control everything because you can't deal with reality.

Don't you have a dead wife's grave to be crying over? Either show some wisdom for your age or stick a gun in your mouth and STFU.

 

[Wyldfire]

Originally posted by ShortTimer
I shall comment thusly:

You're an idiot. Women aren't any fun when they act like robots. You're acting like a child and trying to control everything because you can't deal with reality.

Don't you have a dead wife's grave to be crying over? Either show some wisdom for your age or stick a gun in your mouth and STFU.

That's a bit harsh...

He IS older and grew up in a time where things were different...so it's a tough adjustment for him. Yes, he's being totally unrealistic, but your comment was out of line, too.

 

[Climax]

ENOUGH ALREADY!!

Ok..... we need to do 2 things...

One:

*GROUP HUG*

Two:

Close this thread.


Laterz...

 

[Wyldfire]

Originally posted by Giovanni Casanova
Define older.

Although his age marker claims he's 58, his profile says his birthday is December 31, 1969. That would make him 35 years old. So he's either 58 or 35, he's not really sure which.

Either way, since slavery was abolished in the 1860s, and both ages are too young to have experienced that, he is full of sh*t.

I don't look at profiles. If an age is listed by their name on the posts, that's what I base any assumptions of age on.

If he is 58 he would have been born in 1947 and would have grown up in a time when the women more often than not didn't work and things worked in the way he's talking about. I think that generation is the roughest for men because they look to the marriage of their parents to model after, because that is what is normal for them. At the same time, that generation of men became adults right amid the period of time when things began to drastically change with women, work, and the onset of the significant changes in the traditional family. Many of the men of that generation have a really hard time meshing what they view as a normal marriage with the reality of things.


I wouldn't go so far as to call what he touts "slavery"...because he at least seems to be saying that the man has to do right by his wife. Of course, that doesn't make the control factor any less demeaning and insulting. Again...my guess would be that he's simply wanting to model after the marriage he saw his parents have in a world that such a marriage no longer fits into.

 

[Brother_Rapp]

Wyldfire
Brother Rapp...you are going to have to find yourself a deaf, dumb and mute woman or purchase yourself a blow up doll, because the likelihood of you actually finding a woman willing to put up with the living conditions you are expecting is pretty much nil.

Brother Rapp
That’s argumentative. In your particular marriage, you choose poorly. If you knew then what you know now about him, you probably would never have gotten involved with him. All that’s Monday night quarterbacking now. You can’t just base everything on that one experience. If you do, you’re not being fare to yourself. You came to the guy with an open heart. You basically wanted to trust him. You gave him every opportunity to live up to that trust that you surrendered to him. You’re not special. What you did is what all women want to do.


Wyldfire
Back when women weren't able to support themselves they really had no choice but to accept being treated like a possession instead of a partner in life.


Brother Rapp
I keep hearing this crap about women being the possession of men. I do not adhere to that in any way. I say that they are equal. A woman should be paid the same as a man for the same job. A woman should be allowed to compete for any job she wants. I got no problem with none of that. I do say that a woman is better at her job in the home then a guy is and a guy is better at his job in the home then a woman is. Problems arise when the two of them deviate in a measurable way from those traditional roles.

People only do so much as they have to do to get what they want. If the woman does his job, the man will sit on his ass every time. If the man does her job, the woman will sit on her ass every time.

The woman is the natural caregiver by way of biology and tradition. The man is the hunter by way of biology and tradition. GENERALLY speaking, when couples go and/ or have gone against their traditional roles there were problems.




Wyldfire
That's not the case anymore, and it's why you don't see many women wanting to live the kind of existence you are touting. Women do NOT like being treated in the way you are promoting here. If they liked and wanted that it would be the norm.



Brother Rapp
This is were we really differ. The feminist movement has played a big part in the brainwashing of women. I believe that women are shamed by the feminist movement into rejecting the role of the traditional wife. There will always be marriages that will fail. Those marriages that failed gave steam to the feminist movement. The whole shyt kept snowballing after that. I think that you would call that a self fulfilling prophesy. It’s sort of like we have violent crimes because we have guns, therefore we need guns to protect ourselves. But if nobody had guns, would we have violent crimes and would we therefore need guns to protect ourselves? The more guns that a gun manufacturer sells the more guns he will be able to sell. The more feminist are allowed to brainwash the heads of women, the more they will be able to brainwash the heads of women.


Wyldfire
Now it's not a bad thing to be traditional in some respects, but NOT if it violates the rights of either of the two people or causes one to feel hurt or mistreated.

Brother Rapp
I didn’t say that a woman doesn’t have rights in a marriage. Everybody has rights. Marriage shouldn’t me entered into by means of intimidation. Nor should marriage be held together by way of violence by either party. I do say that it is in the best interest of the woman to allow the guy to exercise his traditional role in a marriage.


Wyldfire
Your obsession over control of money leads me to wonder if perhaps you are married and are having a conflict over this issue with your wife. Or perhaps she left you over the issue. I just think there is more to this broken record you're on here than meets the eye.

Brother Rapp
My wife of 12 years past away in ’96. I stated that earlier. I also said that I wanted her back. That’s as far as I’m willing to go on that subject. Please respect my wishes.



Wyldfire

So tell us...WHY are you so focused on this issue?

Brother Rapp
I could have choosen any issue. I believe that failed marriages are the main causes of single parent homes and poverty. It ain’t easy being a single father raising kids either. I am so focused in my discussion on this issue, because it’s the topic.

 

[Wyldfire]

I didn't catch the part about your wife passing away. I'm sorry for your loss.

Perhaps you don't mean to come across as sounding like you view women as a possession, but in reality...that is exactly how you are coming across. No two women are exactly the same and no two relationships are, either. You are not going to find a carbon copy of your deceased wife or a mirror image of your relationship with her.

Feminism HAS contributed to changing a lot of things...but in order for it to have an influence on women to the extent it has there HAD to be dissatisfaction among women about how their lives were. That's the bottom line. An ideology cannot take a foothold where there is no unhappiness with the status-quo. Women wanted more choices...and there is nothing wrong with that. Yes, Feminism has gone way too far with the male bashing and giving women an unfair advantage legally, among other things...but in the grand scheme of things...if women were truly happy with how their lives were back in the day they would still be embracing that kind of lifestyle. To see proof that women were not satisfied or happy all you have to do is take an honest look at how they are utilizing the choices they have now. Perhaps that reality is hard for you and others to swallow...but truth be told...it's still the reality and like it or not, it's what you are going to have to accept and deal with. Sure, there are a very limited number of women who would be tolerant of the conditions you talk about...but again, the likelihood of finding one is virtually nil.

 

[SheDevil]

Because somebody may not agree with you, you say that their mind is closed? Have you found any thing in any of my posts that you agree with in even the slightest way?

SD: It is your universal PREACHING

“I think you are too proud to admit it and too proud to ask, but I think you have come here to try to learn a way to be with a more complex woman.”

I like for my beliefs to be challenged. A person should always try to say what he or she believes and be ready to defend their beliefs.

“I feel your skills with women are very limited, this is fully based on the 'stuff' you are preaching. You want more in a woman, dont you?”

What I want is my wife back. We were married 12 years and she passed away in ’96. She was truly a wonderful woman. I want my wife back [/B][/QUOTE]