I'm tired

[STR8UP]

Meant to wake you up. Too much thinking! Cut it out. Too much focus on someone who deserves it not.

I agree with this, however, it's only because it is in my nature, not because I'm all into this particular chick.

Don't you find it interesting to figure out the reasons why a woman's behavior is inconsistent? I wasn't upset when I heard it. i was like "ahHA!"

Just goes to show you that there can be a million and one reasons for a woman behaving strangely.

 

[grinder]

A million and two reasons. I just don't have the mental energy to try and do it. It feels like diving into a rabbit hole and you never get the rabbit.

I'm serious when I say I stop myself the moment I sense I start to analyze them. I can't tell you the times recently I have just ignored something that used to bug me and dammed if it was not smooth sailing over what previously was a ravine.

I will change my focus purposely to another one or two I have been working. Really, it is a mental trick to turn off those laser beams on any one and focus on another or two.

This is my version of plate spinning. I seldom am actually dating two at a time but my MIND is almost never on only one at a time. This has made my life so much easier.

 

[aliasguy]

Str8UP wrote---


I've said it before. A woman usually has one man she "wants", another man she shares intimacy with if the man she "wants" is not available, and numerous AFC orbiters that serve to prop up her fragile ego with any attention and validation the two "main" guys don't provide for her.

Umm. ---- "dittoes", man. But so what --- that's life. We accept, and move on


Also, I'm a little concerned for you about this Lebanese chick. I'm not saying "oneitis," but you seem a little too "into" what she's all about. Why try harder to figure HER out than any other? Who cares if she's into her ex? That's gonna be an on-again, off-again thing for MOST of these chicks. Let her go. You've got enough other stuff in the pipeline.

 

[John-467]

I seriously looked up to Str8up when he made those KICK AZZ Wealth Threads, Str8up was an inspiration, I was JUST starting out in sales back then, very young (even younger than I am now).

I have no idea wtf happened to this guy, he has a new post every day and he's just.....I don't know.

Even he flamed me in the previous discussion joining with all people KETO, the Str8up I first read about 2 years ago was WAY MORE ALPHA AND DON JUAN THAN THAT.

Str8up you have become a straight bytch

(<< Laughs to himself, maybe he's getting old)

 

[STR8UP]

Also, I'm a little concerned for you about this Lebanese chick. I'm not saying "oneitis," but you seem a little too "into" what she's all about. Why try harder to figure HER out than any other? Who cares if she's into her ex? That's gonna be an on-again, off-again thing for MOST of these chicks. Let her go. You've got enough other stuff in the pipeline.

I just feel as if I have gained such valuable insight over the past couple of years that every time I experience another situation I want to go even deeper and extract more.

To be honest, I was going to post some more observations about the AW, but I just think that too many people get the idea that I'm obsessing over these women when I'm really not.....it's all in the name of learning. I've trained myself to try to be a third person observer during my interactions with women.

You're probably right though. I had a drink the other night with Deep Dish and we were talking about how he hasn't been posting much lately and how it's a welcome break. I've been saying I need to give it a rest for awhile. Eventually I'm gonna have to, but this is really my only hobby with having so little free time.

 

[STR8UP]

Str8up you have become a straight bytch

Sorry to disappoint you.

 

[STR8UP]

I'm serious when I say I stop myself the moment I sense I start to analyze them. I can't tell you the times recently I have just ignored something that used to bug me and dammed if it was not smooth sailing over what previously was a ravine.

I will change my focus purposely to another one or two I have been working. Really, it is a mental trick to turn off those laser beams on any one and focus on another or two.

This is my version of plate spinning. I seldom am actually dating two at a time but my MIND is almost never on only one at a time. This has made my life so much easier.

That's a good way to keep things in check.

I just know that I'm not doing it because I am concerned with the outcome nearly as much as LEARNING from the experience.

 

[ketostix]

OKaaaayyyyy........

Called up the AW today, as this was my first day off in awhile and i was looking for someone to get some dinner with. chilled with her for awhile and she started talking about the Lebanese girl. Interestingly she was able to shed some light on the subject for me.

I don't bring up this other chick around the AW. One reason is that I just don't talk about stuff like that to most people. The other reason is that I was still unsure of if she was cool with it or not, despite the fact that she would have no reason not to be.

Anyway, soon after I got to her house the AW says, "Sooooo.....I hear you have been hanging out with my friend lately. What's up with that??"

I didn't really answer, just tried to feel her out for what SHE had heard, but doesn't look like it was anything more than a passing convo the two had about her hanging out with me.

I blew it off, but later on in the night she again brought up her friend.

This time she talked about how she was upset that she didn't show up to her birthday party that was planned specifically around the friends schedule.

She then proceeds to tell me that this chick seems to be hung up on her ex husband FROM LIKE 7 YEARS AGO, who used her to get a green card, left her for some other woman who could have children (I guess the Lebanese girl can't have kids) and ran up her credit cards and moved out of the country.

Interesting!

So I guess when she was out of town a couple of weeks ago she met up with the ex husband, and now she thinks he is going to leave his current wife and kids to get back with her!

Are chicks REALLY that stupid??

Wait, don't answer that....I already know.

So.......there's the reason why I couldn't put my finger on what was up with her. Hot then lukewarm.

I've said it before. A woman usually has one man she "wants", another man she shares intimacy with if the man she "wants" is not available, and numerous AFC orbiters that serve to prop up her fragile ego with any attention and validation the two "main" guys don't provide for her.

See, all along I got the feeling that there was another man involved, but I didn't get the impression that she was necessarily dating someone else. Turns out I was right on the money.

So now one part of me says "Ah HA! Now I know what I am dealing with and what good can come of it! WALK AWAY!"

Another part of me says, "Okay, no reason to give up. This chick is living a FANTASY that will never come true. Proceed forward, get what you can, and take it one step at a time".

Another thing she said, which she sort of mentioned in the past, is that you can't make plans with this chick cause she's unreliable. It all falls into place....

Any thoughts?

AW was a good source of intel. Yes it all makes sense now. In a way we were both right and it's always about other guys. But Lebanese girl wasn't really choosing another guy that came into the picture over you per se. From her faulty perspective you're the other guy. He was always in the picture. Like AW said she's unreliable. I think the decision is clear. Give maybe one more attempt for a meet up and if she doesn't deliver, walk away and it is up to her to come to you. AW seemed a little jealous, but she is a AW afterall.

Str8up, you have to ignore some of the posters on here. Anytime you discuss a particular girl, they invariably come out and say, "You're an AFC with one-itis!" . This is a site about discussing women. And how many times have you explained it that you are just analyzing things for fun and there's no emotional investment? I for one want to hear about your stories and hear your analysis. I shouldn't be punished for the sins of others .

I've said it before. A woman usually has one man she "wants", another man she shares intimacy with if the man she "wants" is not available, and numerous AFC orbiters that serve to prop up her fragile ego with any attention and validation the two "main" guys don't provide for her.

No truer words have been spoken. It's valid to say walk away and there's always a point in time it needs to be done. But if you walk away every time a girl doesn't do everything the way you'd like her to do, you're going to be walking away from desirable girls and screwing a lot of lower quality ones. I can walk away mentally but still keep my fishing line out for a particular girl and pursue other girls, and Str8up I think you're at the point you can do that as well.

 

[grinder]

I just know that I'm not doing it because I am concerned with the outcome nearly as much as LEARNING from the experience.

We care about that on which we focus.

This is a universal.

IMHO stating you are analyzing for the sake of learning or edifying others is a form of rationalization.

I’m just not buying that you can expend huge amounts of your precious time thinking and writing about a girl and state you are not concerned with the outcome with her.

However, given your argument, then are you saying that all your current relationships mean less on a personal level than the learning experience; nothing but fodder for reaching some distant goal?

If this is so then you’ve split yourself down the middle: a present self learning and striving to be some type of future self; and that future self which remains ever in the future.

I think you have the wisdom to understand the present self and the future self need to meet. The Lebanese woman is not just a learning experience, she’s real, she’s now, and face it, she matters.

And keto, I’m not saying analyzing for the sake of learning is a mistake, I’m looking at our own processes, the way WE think as well. Self examination is painful.

Many of the things STR8UP has posted on this woman we have ALL done, we’ve all been there or are there right now.

 

[STR8UP]

When she said she wanted to buy you dinner and would call you, she might've meant it at the time at least. And when Saturday night rolled around, she might've still meant it but she didn't really mean she'd be the one to call you. She very well could've been sitting around wondering the same thing, wondering why you haven't called her. I know she said she'd be the one to call, but it's rare that a girl has been the one to call and finalize the plans even if she said she would IME.

Keto-

Are you clairvoyant? Do you have a crystal ball or something?

I swear, you have a sixth sense for stuff like this. You were right on the money.

Shot her a text saying "Did you forget about something?" She calls me a minute later asking what it was that she forgot. As far as I could tell she was serious that she had no clue. She was asking if she forgot someone's birthday or something.

So we were talking a little more and she said something about Saturday, how I was supposed to call HER but she figured I had gotten tied up, and she had a bunch of stuff going on as well, blah, blah.

I know chicks can be loopy like that, but I don't think I remember having had that happen before.

So the interest still seems to be there. Like you said, I need to get her in my zone and really step it up, then from that point I should be able to kick back a little and let her do some of the "work".

 

[ketostix]

Keto-

Are you clairvoyant? Do you have a crystal ball or something?

I swear, you have a sixth sense for stuff like this. You were right on the money.

Shot her a text saying "Did you forget about something?" She calls me a minute later asking what it was that she forgot. As far as I could tell she was serious that she had no clue. She was asking if she forgot someone's birthday or something.

So we were talking a little more and she said something about Saturday, how I was supposed to call HER but she figured I had gotten tied up, and she had a bunch of stuff going on as well, blah, blah.

I know chicks can be loopy like that, but I don't think I remember having had that happen before.

So the interest still seems to be there. Like you said, I need to get her in my zone and really step it up, then from that point I should be able to kick back a little and let her do some of the "work".

Str8up, thanks for the update. I don't deserve that much credit though because there is still the posibility this girl is a master gamer. This is actually a masterful way to get out of a flake, or actually to get out of anything when you're clearly in the wrong, play dumb, then blame it on the other person. However, having said that it's still something basically only a chick would do, so it's just as valid that she really was thinking you were suppose to call her. And I still think she is probably interested in you.

It's just that she is being difficult. Like you said you do need to get her to meet up and escalate and step it up, before it becomes a friends situation. Enforce your agenda over hers basically. Also I think it was perfect how you texted her with the question, "Did you forget something?" and kept it simple, straight, yet vague. That was a lot better than giving any hint to what she had forgotten IMO.

 

[jophil28]

Don't you find it interesting to figure out the reasons why a woman's behavior is inconsistent? ----
Just goes to show you that there can be a million and one reasons for a woman behaving strangely.

Straitup- I am a lot older that you and more experienced because I have walked around on the planet A LOT. I am a student of human nature and women in particular.
Trying to figure out WHY women do what they do is a HUGE waste of good quality male neuronal energy.

They do what they do BECAUSE, to a woman, their behavior just happens. The majority of women are utterly devoid of self awareness and even less interested in taking resposibility for their actions and the consequences.

I lived in Dallas TX for a while in the late 70's and the weather there is unpredictable and rapidly changing- reminds me of women's emotions and their actions.
Women act on their feelings and justify it later ( you have said so in a post) ). THeir actions ,to them are a natural follow-on to their feelings, and their feelings swirl and tumble hourly sometimes. THis process is spontaneous and impulsive and usually is driven by the emotion IN THE MOMENT.

The question is NOT why a particular woman did whatever she did, it is whether her behavior is OK with you or NOT.

I learned a long time ago not to try to make sense of nonsense.

 

[jophil28]

Don't you find it interesting to figure out the reasons why a woman's behavior is inconsistent? ----
Just goes to show you that there can be a million and one reasons for a woman behaving strangely.

Straitup- I am a lot older that you and more experienced because I have walked around on the planet A LOT. I am a student of human nature and women in particular.
Trying to figure out WHY women do what they do is a HUGE waste of good quality male neuronal energy.

They do what they do BECAUSE, to a woman, their behavior just happens. The majority of women are utterly devoid of self awareness and even less interested in taking resposibility for their actions and the consequences.

I lived in Dallas TX for a while in the late 70's and the weather there is unpredictable and rapidly changing- reminds me of women's emotions and their actions.
Women act on their feelings and justify it later ( you have said so in a post) ). THeir actions ,to them are a natural follow-on to their feelings, and their feelings swirl and tumble hourly sometimes. THis process is spontaneous and impulsive and usually is driven by the emotion IN THE MOMENT.

The question is NOT why a particular woman did whatever she did, it is whether her behavior is OK with you or NOT.

I learned a long time ago not to try to make sense of nonsense.

 

[KontrollerX]

"I learned a long time ago not to try to make sense of nonsense."

Well said.

 

[joekerr31]

They do what they do BECAUSE, to a woman, their behavior just happens. The majority of women are utterly devoid of self awareness and even less interested in taking resposibility for their actions and the consequences.

the only thing (most) women really spend any time and effort on is making themselves attractive to men.

if you gave most women a choice, beauty or brains, 98% of them would choose beauty.

theres a reason they sell cylinders of lipstick for like 20 bucks. i don't know what the markup margin is on beauty products, but i bet you its outrageous.

women will pay ANYTHING for something that makes them look better.

 

[ketostix]

I lived in Dallas TX for a while in the late 70's and the weather there is unpredictable and rapidly changing- reminds me of women's emotions and their actions.

I lived in Dallas in the the 80's, but not currently. Small world. The weather is even more changeable a few 100 miles North of Dallas.

The question is NOT why a particular woman did whatever she did, it is whether her behavior is OK with you or NOT.

This is the bottom line true. But women's behavior will never be completely OK with you. Sometimes you get info that tells you it might be worth the trouble. You just got to know when to cut your losses and move on.

I learned a long time ago not to try to make sense of nonsense.

I actually agree but isn't that what we do on this forum. Try to make sense of nonsense? Or at the least debate how to best deal with it and plan are moves.

 

[STR8UP]

I actually agree but isn't that what we do on this forum. Try to make sense of nonsense? Or at the least debate how to best deal with it and plan are moves.

That's what I don't get about some folks here.

This is a forum to discuss the ins and outs of dealing with women. But any time you try to look a little deeper that the surface, any deeper than what we already know, you automatically get told "you think too much".

THAT'S WHAT THE FUKK I'M HERE FOR!

I have known the basic mechanics of this stuff for a long time. I come here nowadays to polish and fine tune my ideas and theories because 1) It interests me, and 2) Who knows, maybe one day I will write something?

I was going to post some recent observations of my AW friend, but every other reply to the thread would be that I need to "forget about her", so i don't even bother.

Sh!t, I probably refrain from posting 30% of the material I would like to discuss for this very reason

 

[joekerr31]

Sh!t, I probably refrain from posting 30% of the material I would like to discuss for this very reason

if its any concelation i'll take an interest if you post it.

 

[STR8UP]

if its any concelation i'll take an interest if you post it.

I appreciate that man. It helps me out a lot to divert my attention to something as pointless as trying to understand women.

That said......Lebanese chick sends me a text later tonight that looked like something one of her friends sent her that was forwarded.

It said something like "I finally graduated! We are celebrating saturday night at xxxxx at xxxxxx. I have reserved tables for 9:00. Hope to see you there. Julie"

What the fukk was that?

I'm assuming it was an invite to a dinner party, but I didn't call her and she didn't cal me to follow up, so I have no idea.....

It's seeming more and more that this chick is only willing to do the minimum to ensure that I stick around and wants me to make all the moves. Even when SHE suggests something or even ASKS ME OUT, she expects me to be the one who follows up and makes it happen.

Maybe she's just one of those chicks who grew up thinking that the man needs to do the pursuing. I dunno.Is it the Muslim upbringing? I'm close to the point where I don't want to put any more effort into it. I'm used to interested women taking a little more initiative.

 

[Last Man Standing]

Str8up. I applaud you for sharing your personal dilemmas with us - it shows your openness - and this is admirable. Your problem is that you do not see things/people for what/who they are - not because you lack knowledge, but it is because you lack understanding!

This woman is not what you take her to be - but she sees you for who you are!!

The question is NOT why a particular woman did whatever she did, it is whether her behavior is OK with you or NOT.

I learned a long time ago not to try to make sense of nonsense.

You are starting to sound like me - or is it that I'm sounding like you?