I'm leaving my job, should I send her an email?

[latino158]

I have feelings for a coworker, and I'm leaving today, because I found something better I couldn't pass up, I cannot say goodbye to her in person, because she doesn't work today, so I won't get to see her anymore

I'm 31 and she is 45 and married. We are friends, and had good times together, we've known each other for 6 months now, but she doesn't know that I feel something for her, and even if I never tell her anything, she may still be hesitant to meet me outside the workplace, but who knows, maybe she would. I have her on facebook, whatsapp, but we have never met outside the job.

I already have a goodbye letter prepared to send to her email, but I'm having doubts, my fear is that any little chance that I have to keep her as a friend, and maybe have a coffee with her, may vanish after i send my letter, who knows how she will react, is not really a love letter, but i tell her that i really care about her, and how much she means to me, im not literally telling her that i love her

at the most, i would like to send a friendly goodbye letter, since i didn't get to say goodbye to her

but i also feel like either way, i will probably won't get to see her anymore

 

[Alpheta]

shes married. Just gtfo and move on. Catching oneitis on a woman whos married and youve only known for 6 months, just lol.

 

[Willard]

She's married, your probably just infatuated, you should really just let it go, no good can come out of it. You'll forget all about her in a couple of weeks.

 

[latino158]

how would it fuk me over? i dont see the problem, is not a love letter, more about expressing how much i care about her and our friendship

more than likely i wont see her again, very unlikely she will want to meet in person

 

[Building_and_Loan]

Say nothing more than "Sorry I didn't get to see you to say goodbye, take care with everything here and best of luck! "

Keep it strictly platonic. She's married. Do not express feelings for her, especially over email

 

[Yewki]

You've been in the friend zone with a 45 year old married woman co-worker for 6 months... my head hurts just thinking about that sentence.

Delete the letter you prepared. Immediatley. This isn't some high school secret admirer bullsh*t. You send some something like that, you will lose whatever respect she has for you.

You're barking up the wrong tree, but if you really want to pursue her (not smart), then e-mail something very basic... "Today is my last day, surprise! I'm pursuing a new opportunity elsewhere. We should stay in touch, what is a good number to reach you?"

 

[Laharl]

Expressing your feelings in person is a sign of strength. Expressing them in a mail is a sign of weakness. It just shows you're not confident enough to write s short note you want to meet, meet her later and say what you have to say to her eyes.

I also agree with the previous posters this seems like a stupid crush but if feel you have to follow through on it it at least you do it properly.

 

[thatfeel]

Agreed with Laharl.

 

[marmel75]

No need to send some long, sniffly goodbye email, only thing that's going to do is ruin your chances. If anything, send something like:

"Just wanted to let you know I've accepted a position at another company, but think you are a really cool person and wanted to keep in touch. Hit me up sometime at xxx-xxxx and we can talk more."

That's it. If she is interested in continuing things she will contact you. If she isn't she won't. She knows why you are telling her to contact you. Now if she does contact you, then set something up and get at her. It's not your job to police her morality. Maybe the husband is some fat slob that needs viagara to last 5 minutes and she needs someone to tear her up every now and then...

 

[Willard]

This has bad idea written all over it, I don't have a morality problem with it either. If you banged her at a work party after drinking that would be cool.

A few weeks ago I was laying in bed after banging a chick and she was sleeping, I heard a pounding on the door, I was hoping she wouldn't wake up, then she did, I had no idea what to expect. It turned out to be her tenants, they burned up the kitchen and couldn't get her on the phone. For about 5 minutes I was thinking this isn't going to be good.

This is just a crush, forget about it.

 

[latino158]

Expressing your feelings in person is a sign of strength. Expressing them in a mail is a sign of weakness. It just shows you're not confident enough to write s short note you want to meet, meet her later and say what you have to say to her eyes.

I also agree with the previous posters this seems like a stupid crush but if feel you have to follow through on it it at least you do it properly.

i already have her phone, facebook, whatsapp lol

i dont want any chances, i dont want anything from her, i just want to say goodbye and how much means to me, i dont even tell her that i have feelings for her or anything, i dont see whats wrong with it, but i can understand why you guys say that because i think so too, that it will come off too strong, like i dont have the balls to say it in person, that i would sound like an immature kid, but at least i wanna say good bye, and tell her how much she meant to me, not necessarily that i have feelings

you mention 1 or 3 short paragraphs, that's not enough for me

 

[SeymourCake]

This is beta as fuk brah. Don't ever write letters or poems to girls, especially if you're 31.

If you send it through email, then she can show her coworkers and they'll all laugh at you. Even worse, her husband can see it and it'll cause problems between you and them, and their relationship.

 

[latino158]

This is beta as fuk brah. Don't ever write letters or poems to girls, especially if you're 31.

If you send it through email, then she can show her coworkers and they'll all laugh at you. Even worse, her husband can see it and it'll cause problems between you and them, and their relationship.

she would never show a personal email to others

but, yeah, her husband could see it, who knows, but i feel like i need to say good bye, what is a good message to send, where i can express how much she meant to me as a friend, and also keep it short, not romantic, etc

i feel like, oh i found something else, lets keep touch good luck ... is not enough, i feel is too cold, and that i should say more

 

[piranha45]

If you mean anything to her, SHE will go out of her way to give YOU a goodbye.

If she doesn't, then at least you'll know she thinks NOTHING of you.

Be a fvcking man and let women worry about the feels.

 

[Yewki]

she would never show a personal email to others

Honestly if her husband saw your 1000 word essay on why you and her should be best friends he'd probably just laugh and feel sorry for you.

i feel like i need to say good bye, what is a good message to send, where i can express how much she meant to me as a friend, and also keep it short, not romantic, etc

i feel like, oh i found something else, lets keep touch good luck ... is not enough, i feel is too cold, and that i should say more

So... even in your long letter to this woman you still just want to come across as friends? Who knows maybe if you write letters to her for 6 more months she'll kiss you.

 

[latino158]

If you mean anything to her, SHE will go out of her way to give YOU a goodbye.

If she doesn't, then at least you'll know she thinks NOTHING of you.

Be a fvcking man and let women worry about the feels.

how would she give a goodbye when i just left and she is not even working right now lmao she dont know where i live, except for my facebook, phone, whatsapp, so if i dont tell her anything sooner or later, she is gonna realize im gone, and will probably text me asking what happened

 

[Alexandar]

did you seriously just say 1-3 PARAGRAPHS isnt enough for you? what in the phuck is wrong with you. there is no hope. i dont even know why people are posting in this thread. thats like trying to help someone like yannick. good luck.

 

[latino158]

did you seriously just say 1-3 PARAGRAPHS isnt enough for you? what in the phuck is wrong with you. there is no hope. i dont even know why people are posting in this thread. thats like trying to help someone like yannick. good luck.

not enough to express what i need to say

i don't want to sound cold, but i don't want to sound like i'm in love either

 

[latino158]

Honestly if her husband saw your 1000 word essay on why you and her should be best friends he'd probably just laugh and feel sorry for you.



So... even in your long letter to this woman you still just want to come across as friends? Who knows maybe if you write letters to her for 6 more months she'll kiss you.

i wouldn't give a **** anyway, i know if i had a wife, and some 19 year old kid wrote her a letter, i would laugh at him as well

so what do u want me to do, not say ****, and simply ignore her, don't say a decent good bye to her as if we never met

you don't know the circumstances and what we are like, therefore your advice is very general, based on the little information i have given you

i created this thread, because deep down, i know is a bad idea to send such letter, but i also want to say goodbye, and hopefully keep in touch

 

[Trump]

i wouldn't give a **** anyway, i know if i had a wife, and some 19 year old kid wrote her a letter, i would laugh at him as well

so what do u want me to do, not say ****, and simply ignore her, don't say a decent good bye to her as if we never met

you don't know the circumstances and what we are like, therefore your advice is very general, based on the little information i have given you

i created this thread, because deep down, i know is a bad idea to send such letter, but i also want to say goodbye, and hopefully keep in touch

As was mentioned, you can't say anything in a letter or in a person. She is MARRIED and has a HUSBAND. You say or write anything to her, and her husband will come down and re-arrange your face, and you will get fired from your new job as well.

You guys sure like playing with fire. You should ask out single, available women, not women who are having sex with their husband every night.