I'm going to date a bpd chick

[RichardTheFrog]

They want to trade sex for something. Sex. The most important thing in life. The thing that heals you and extends your energy and years. It's worth something.

Women exploit men for resources the way children exploit women for resources.

Instead of complaining about what they take, I give them 10% of the additional proceeds their energy brings me and call it a deal.

Yea that's why I just **** prostitutes, which I've been doing for years, but that's not fulfilling and you definitely can't have children with a prostitute.

 

[btownbuck2012]

LMMFAO

She even has the purple/bluish BPD hair! Great pic!

 

[TheFixer14]

Women with personality disorders are academy award winning actresses. You don't know what is happening to you until you're sucked in too far to eject.

The best way I've seen it described is in a book I'm currently read called "The object of affection is in my reflection". This book specifically deals with Narcissistic PD, but these disorders often run comorbid with one another. So it's not uncommon for someone like this to exibit traits of all the different cluster B disorders. But here's what it feels like being wrecked by one of these women:

"The ability to simply switch off is painful and startling to those who have witnessed it. Those on the other side of this phenomenon feel almost as if they had been standing under a shower of incredible love and adoration, then one day the water is turned off without notice - and they are left feeling bare, cold and bereft. The narcissist moves from expressions of care, love, intense interest, involvement, commitment, protection, and overvaluation to total disregard, disgust and lack of any interest or emotional involment."

The difference between the NPD and BPD is that the BPD will cycle you back quickly, but sometimes they won't. It could take years before you hear from them again just like the Narcissist.

What's truly ironic is that it is the guys who have their act together who are the primary target of these women because it'll take longer for them to "switch off". If you're a supplicating, beta chump she'll discard you within weeks, maybe a month of meeing you. But if you're high value in her eyes, it won't happen until you're hooked. Your bank account, your pesonality, your body, your d*ck, how many times you've made her ***, your status, your power, etc. MEAN NOTHING. This woman's only objective is to control you and the higher status you are the harder she hits you. She only feels satisfied once you're completely ruined.

So yeah, go ahead and try to "date" one, tough guy.

OMG, you just described a recent situation that I had with a girl. I was like "man one week she is singing my praises on how amazing I am and is supportive and the next she thinks that I'm not enough and wants nothing to do with me.". And I felt so ****ed up afterwards then I realized that all she wanted was to control me and have me fit into her mold.

Though, it's tough to just say that someone is mentally ill, and this is coming from a guy who suffers from bipolar. I'd say more than likely women like these are just emotionally manipulative.

 

[Serenity]

"Unaware" of what specifically? Common sense?

Unaware of how I was being manipulated. It's easy to say "common sense" when you know how. Common sense takes on a different meaning when you're in this type of situation. You still haven't got a clue what you're talking about.

How exactly did you get ****ed over?

And what exactly was her BPD behavior?

How? Scammed out of money, threatened with murder and having to witness violence at a very young age. Yes that fucked me up.

Her behavior? Love you one moment, hate you the next moment and if I didn't do as she asked I was attacked. I was too young to know what to do, so I lived in constant fear. A fear that took a couple of years of intensive work on myself to get rid of.

If you want the more vivid stories I suggest you dig into my post history from the time I joined this forum.

 

[Billtx49]

OMG, you just described a recent situation that I had with a girl. I was like "man one week she is singing my praises on how amazing I am and is supportive and the next she thinks that I'm not enough and wants nothing to do with me.". And I felt so ****ed up afterwards then I realized that all she wanted was to control me and have me fit into her mold.

Though, it's tough to just say that someone is mentally ill, and this is coming from a guy who suffers from bipolar. I'd say more than likely women like these are just emotionally manipulative.

Doesn't matter what she is or is not. You just described an easy to spot, very unstable rapidly cycling woman that is better to stay away from. It's not exactly normal healthy well adjusted behavior is it ?

 

[sosousage]

its probably tough but considering games and manipulation its no difference. nowadays women are manipulative. bpd or not

i dont know why. probably theres shock in their heads at the moment when they install tinder for the first time and they start to think they can do anything they want and men will su*k their feet anyway

 

[QuadDeuces]

It's possible to date a BPD, just don't make her your girlfriend or main chick.

 

[051AV]

Fly at it if you want to date a BPD you will see what its like. I will never get involved with a mentally ill woman again you only do that once. BPDs come across as a very nice warm and friendly woman, the high functioning BPDs like my ex you wouldn't ever know what is wrong with her. Once they feel comfortable with you watch out you've just opened pandoras box there is no turning back. My ex caused me a lot of stress, when I tried getting her out of my life she made my life even more stressful she was pissed off. I worked with her so I had to see her on a regular basis she hated the fact I rejected her even thou she found my replacement. Things escalated she turned vicious I really had to watch out I could have had the cuffs slapped on me she was making up stories that I was being abusive and intimidating which were all lies. People seen who she really was she aired all the dirty laundry people seen what kind of nut she truly is. She's latched on an NPD guy who is a few bricks short of a load like her, she's convinced him to let her move in now they live together. She can continue the train wreck she calls her life I jumped off the train banged up and bruised.

She was so proud she destroyed her ex's life before me he didn't bounce back health wise he's aged and fat, I bounced back I'm healthy and happy that pisses her off. The guy she's with he's aging fast he's in his mid 30s looks nearly 50, hair falling out in clumps, gaining weight he's got to be sporting 42-44 inch waist pants. No way in the hell he will bounce back he's damaged his health severely he will die of a heart attack, his blood pressure is through the roof his face red as a tomato. I'm older than the guy she replaced me with but I look 10 years younger and a good 100 pounds lighter. The big difference is he's grossly insecure she loves insecure guys, she thought I was one when we met I'm not insecure, she found I was not. I do feel bad for the guy she's with he gave everything up for her. He was working hard at furthering his career to bump him up to a 100 grand a year job, he was so close to doing that then he "fell" in love with the BPD its his first girl friend the first girl that ever gave him attention. Today he's well......... what can I say screwed.

 

[bigneil]

How? Scammed out of money, threatened with murder and having to witness violence at a very young age.

Her behavior? Love you one moment, hate you the next moment and if I didn't do as she asked I was attacked. I lived in constant fear.

Any one of those behaviors should have caused you to leave her.

Hurt me ten times, shame on me.

 

[bigneil]

What the BPD men here are saying is: "I had a terrible girl who did awful things to me over and over and it's because she was CRAZY!!"

 

[btownbuck2012]

It's possible to date a BPD, just don't make her your girlfriend or main chick.

This is what guys don't understand. You don't have a choice in the matter. They fool you into thinking they're quality. You have no idea what you're dealing with until it's too late. A-lot of non disorderded women have similar red flags. The only way you can truly know if you've been involved with one is by going through the full cycle and coming out permanently changed. You have to next the red flags that are typically seen with these types all the while not knowing if she really was a cluster b or not.

 

[TheFixer14]

This is what guys don't understand. You don't have a choice in the matter. They fool you into thinking they're quality. You have no idea what you're dealing with until it's too late. A-lot of non disorderded women have similar red flags. The only way you can truly know if you've been involved with one is by going through the full cycle and coming out permanently changed. You have to next the red flags that are typically seen with these types all the while not knowing if she really was a cluster b or not.

Exactly, that's why it's so critical to not get caught up in the fantasy, be honest with yourself and really see who you are with.

There's no issue with dating a flawed woman. We are all flawed in our own way and even BPD women deserve unconditional love. However, someone who is not doing the self work that is needed or hasn't even heard of it and continued to play these bull**** games deserves to be left at the wayside.

 

[btownbuck2012]

However, someone who is not doing the self work that is needed or hasn't even heard of it and continued to play these bull**** games deserves to be left at the wayside.

Yep, and some times you won't see this with cluster b's until after they've split you black.

 

[btownbuck2012]

What the BPD men here are saying is: "I had a terrible girl who did awful things to me over and over and it's because she was CRAZY!!"

Except that's not what we're saying. For Christ sake man, change your tune.

 

[Serenity]

Any one of those behaviors should have caused you to leave her.

Hurt me ten times, shame on me.

It was my mother, that option was unavailable for a good time. By the time I technically had the option I was mentally broken.

Self-shame is a large part of being victim to this, so fuck off with your "words of wisdom".

 

[bigneil]

It was my mother, that option was unavailable for a good time. By the time I technically had the option I was mentally broken.

Self-shame is a large part of being victim to this, so fuck off with your "words of wisdom".

No, self shame is being a man and owning up to the fact your mom turned you into a pansy. I'm here to help kick your sorry as-s back to reality the way your father would have.

 

[Pandora]

What the BPD men here are saying is: "I had a terrible girl who did awful things to me over and over and it's because she was CRAZY!!"

To the OP and Bigneil, there are certain very identifiable criteria for a women to be BPD. This is not something that we men are making up. This is not just sour grapes. These women are objectively ill. There is a medical checklist that they have to go by in order to diagnose some one as BPD. It is not that hard to do. I dont think most of the men on this forum are making this up. When you run into a BPD you definately know. They are very similair. They self mutilate, they have episodes of raging over trivial things, they take some things to personally and get angry over them, they are sexually reckless, history of substance abuse, history of stripping/ sex work, no real identity etc etc. This is objective stuff. It is not just men having a bad girlfriend and then saying she was crazy. This is coming from someone who had to do clinical rotations in mental health. But I learned the most about BPD when I actually dated a full blown one. It serious bro.

 

[bigneil]

To the OP and Bigneil, there are certain very identifiable criteria for a women to be BPD. This is not something that we men are making up. This is not just sour grapes. These women are objectively ill.

Then you're a moron for dating her.

Every time one of you sissies wants to come here to whine about how you were victimized, I'll be here to kick your sorry as-s back to reality. Hit the gym.

 

[wifehunter]

LMMFAO

She even has the purple/bluish BPD hair! Great pic!

sexy too? :

 

[Pandora]

"Unaware" of what specifically? Common sense? What possible legitimate excuse could you make to ignore things that seem off or "too good to be true"? And what behavior did you learn from these types that you were unaware of previously as if you'd never experienced toxic behaviors in any other person you've ever crossed paths with, saw on TV, the news, heard from others etc? Were "victims" of BPD or toxic chicks living under a rock? I'm not trying to make light of it but I can't see any legitimate excuses for willingly being a victim.

If a man has no idea that BPD exists, then it it understandable that he would fall for the trap. A man falling once for a BPD is not an abnormal thing. Men are supposed to be the protectors and fixers of women. It is just in this society that this natural male instinct is maladaptive. The ony time I blame a man is if he keeps getting in relationships with BPD's over and over again after knowing the true nature of their mental illness.

I think you are exhibiting youthful arrogance with all do respect. You bash on guys that have dated BPD's but yet you stated that you want to date one? Atleast the guys who initially dated BPD's had no idea that BPD existed. This mental illness is still so obscure that most men dont know what signs to even look for. They dont even know that its a thing. You know exactly what it is but you still want to date one. That reeks of desperation and no abundance mentallity.

Dont be so judgy unless you have walking in another mans shoes. BPDs are masters at love bombing and being chameleons. Its like being in a fist fight. You dont know what its like until you have been through it. The girl you want to date may not be a true BPD. But if she is a true BPD, then you are in for a horrible ride. I hope for your sake she is not. You know how I know that you are going to get taken to the cleaners if she is....its because you want to date her in the first place. If you were truly unaffected by BPDs you would simply pass. I hope this post isnt coming off as insulting. I mean it in all respect. I am just saying dont judge until you been through it bro.

These BPDs are not just moody. You have no idea what you are talking about from a clinical perspective. They are actually products of EXTREME trauma ( most of the time). They exhibit real destructive tendencies based on this trauma. They also have emotional regulation issues. Saying that they are just moody is like saying a schizophrenic is just moody. It is ignorant and arrogant.