I'm falling in love.. With a fat chick!

[diceman]

OK, It was Valentines day this year. I went to a club & there were some girls who i'd met in other clubs before & they had a friend with them. A slightly 'large' lady who i got talking to. We got a long quite well, i was drunk, it was Valentines day, so while we were dancing, i got off with her.

She left with her friends after a while, we exchanged numbers, etc.
The following weekend i get a call saying they're goin' to a club & if i'd like to go. As i was annoyed with my housemates that day (i actually wanted to go out, they didn't) so it turned out to be an ideal solution.

I met them there, & got talking to the 'large' girl again. It turns out we have LOADS in common. She liked the same kind of music i did, got my jokes, she even made me laugh (i've never met a woman with a genuinly funny sense of humour). We danced & made fun of other people's dancing & pulling attempts & got off with each other again.

I went back to her house & we had sex.

Anyway, we met up occasionally to get drunk, go out & do each other. She was meant to be a bit of fun untill i found someone a little thinner. I don't want to sound shallow, but looks wise, she's not the ideal woman.

But we spent more & more time together & we REALLY get on. Now, i'm starting to have strong feelings for her. She's said she wanted to get into a relationship a few times & i've said no (i didn't tell her, but it was purly because of her looks).

Am i just really shallow, or am i justified in my responce. & also, what should i do with this thing?

 

[Skel]

I dont care what anyone says, do what makes you happy. Dont worry about how you will be judged. Yes I think you are being shallow

 

[Charm]

I think you are being shallow also. If you are serious about this girl, you need to find a way tactfully of bringing up how her weight causes you to feel less attracted to her and you'd like to help her lose it. You do this by providing her with a diet+exercise plan that she can actually reasonably do. If she dropped 30-40lbs my guess is her body would be much tighter and you'd probably be more attracted.

 

[NickBe]

I hate people who call me shallow because I only sleep with beautiful women. It is an idiotic concept, you are not being shallow, bottom line is if there is no physical attraction the relationship will not last. I fail to see how thinking physical attraction is important makes you a bad person. Personally I can not get hard for anything under a 7. If you are not physically attracted to her do not pursue the relationship, let her know how you feel and if she has any sense she will drop the weight.

 

[Charm]

NickBe, I may be wrong but I think you are missing the point. This is not about his perception of beautiful women. It is about how other people perceive him. He already sleeps with this woman on multiple occasions.

 

[I.A.F.Y.B.]

I don't mind a heavy woman but not super colossal. If you are attracted to her and you are happy. I don't see whats wrong it.

 

[NickSCFC2000]

Picture her naked, cellulite, strech marks and all.

If you get a hardon, then date her, might be the best decision of your life.

If you feel floppy, don't date her, the poor girl needs someone who finds her attractive, don't waste her time or hurt her.

 

[NickSCFC2000]

...and then I read the rest of it.

Stop wasting her time!

 

[Skel]

how big is the girl just out of curiousity?

 

[Obsidian]

i think going out with a semi-UG is a rite of passage for all would-be DJs.

 

[diceman]

Yeah, Charm hit the nail on the head.

I personally don't mind her looks, but it is all about how others will percieve me with her. Reading that, it does sound like i am shallow. I never thought i was that kind of guy, but i guess it's different when it actually happens to you.

I mean, when i'm out in public with her, there's always something in the back of my mind PREYING i don't bump into someone i know. I don't want to feel this way, i really don't, but i just can't help it.

She's a smart girl, i think she's noticed my anxieties while we're out. I've never ONCE commented on her looks, but she knows she's overweight & she is on a diet atm without me saying a thing.

Someone asked her size.. well, Does anyone know the lead singer from The Gossip?

http://www.nme.com/blog/index.php?blog=10&title=pictures_sxsw_2007&more=1&c=1&tb=1&pb=1

Her body is VERY similar to that.

Anyway, do you guys think i should just go for it then? I get on with her more than some of my best friends, but i really can't walk with pride with her on my arm. Damn, i really do sound shallow!

 

[eko]

wow she is fat. haha sometimes fat girls have to be a lot nicer for people to accept them. some of the funniest kids i know are bigger and the most likeable. if u cant settle for it then dont. dont do something u would regret tho either.

 

[onyx]

haha i've done that a few times. Gone out with girls praying I don't bump into any one that I know. I stopped doing it though, I simply won't go out with them if i'm scared of being seeing with them.

 

[Holland]

I don't know man. It depends on what how fat I guess. And how much it bothers you.
But if you really get along well with this chick and you can get turned on by her looks than go for it. Heck, you might even get her on some self improvement and have an amazing girl

The whole thing about being shallow is BS.
If you want a quality chick, for me, that includes looks, nothing wrong with that.
Character is more important, but looks is also a prerequisite.

 

[Bonhomme]

Who cares what others think? If you're into her, all the more power to ya. Less trouble keeping her, too.

I've a friend who likes large women (and is living with one who's almost morbidly obese, truth to be told), and I'm almost envious of him.

 

[Bible_Belt]

http://www.nme.com/images/07316_152328_gossipsxsw2007_05.jpg

damn!

My ex-wife put on about 70 pounds when she got on anti-depressants. I tried to not let it bother me, but one time we were having sex, and it occurred to me that the room looked different. Then I figured out it was because I was higher up in the air when I was on top of her. It was like I was levitating over the bed. I felt like I needed some safety equipment or something...

 

[Gangster Of Love]

Everyone here is imagining you on top of that singer, even if her face is not the same as your girl.

With that being said, don't worry about what anybody says or thinks you should do. Do what makes you happy and make the most out of the girl you are compatible with. When it really comes down to it, nobody really cares who you are dating, it is mostly in your head.

If anybody actually cares, it is due to the fact that they, and most other people, go through this life looking and fail to find the one they are totally compatible with. You are way ahead of most in your situation.

The other option here is that you might be trolling to get a reaction here.

 

[lance135]

Fat bottom girls, you make the rocking world go 'round.

Here's how you can decide whether to keep seeing your big and beautiful woman:

If you found out she was pregnant with your child, how would you feel? Think about you going to birthing classes with her, and being in the delivery room. Think of raising a child together. How proud would you be? Meditate on this, and you'll find your answer.

 

[onyx]

Fat bottom girls, you make the rocking world go 'round.

Here's how you can decide whether to keep seeing your big and beautiful woman:

If you found out she was pregnant with your child, how would you feel when she put on another 5 stone and could no longer walk? Think about you going to birthing classes with her, and being in the delivery room. Think of raising a child together. How proud would you be? Meditate on this, and you'll find your answer.

.....

 

[Bible_Belt]

If you found out she was pregnant with your child, how would you feel?

That's the criteria I use with every woman. I think as men, we have to, because the woman controls all of the decision over abortion .